Chapter 4

The Marketplace

Jaden, Chazz, Luz, and Gumball came to the marketplace of Turquoise Island, not far away from Drift Isle. An island slightly higher up on the economic ladder, it got its name from the freshwater lagoon in the center. And next to that lagoon, Jaden sat with Gumball next to him while Luz was hanging around Chazz, who was reading a book she lent him. Jaden observed the crowd as more and more people gathered round, doing their business.

"So, what's the plan to get money?" Gumball asked, eagerly, as he climbed onto Jaden's shoulder. "Is it money pot? Rat food? Spider eyes? Prince and the pauper? Kingdom Hearts? Little Hellhound? Awesome Store? Futurama? Stinkbug? Get help? C'mon, gimme a hint here."

"You'll find out soon, buddy," Jaden said. "We just gotta wait until the crowd's big enough."

"Which gives us just enough time for Chazz to finish the book," Luz said, eagerly. "So, how ya liking it, Chazz?"

"IT'S STUPID!" Chazz shouted, chucking the book away, making Luz yell as she ran after it. "It's CLEARLY a rip-off, the songs are pointless and only extend the page count! All elements are clearly derivative! The climax lasts way too long! And it makes no sense! Why would a magic hedgehog marry a NINJA?! They're from two different worlds!"

"But the shipping!" Luz said as she put her book into a bag she had.

"Well, the shipping's stupid," Chazz scoffed.

"YOU'RE STUPID!" Luz shouted, storming over to Chazz. Immediately, the two got into a slap fight.

While this went down, Jaden looked around. More and more people fathered. And, when the crowd was big enough, he clapped his hand together. "Guys, we're gonna do this thing!"

"Awesome!" Gumball grinned.

"So, what's the plan?" Luz asked, enthusiastically, as she took advantage of the confusion and pushed Chazz onto his rear.

"We're gonna do a song and dance!" Jaden exclaimed.

"Why am I not surprised?" Chazz asked, flatly, as he stood up, dusting himself off.

"Ooh, this sounds AWESOME!" Luz cheered, giddily. "I always wanted to be in musicals!"

"I dunno. Us singing and dancing? Would people really be interested in seeing that?" Gumball asked…before looking at the fourth wall with a grin that said, 'you know what I mean'.

"I wouldn't," Chazz grunted.

"C'mon, Chazz," Jaden said. "Mom doesn't want us stealing, so we're gonna turn over a new leaf. What better way than this?"

"How about ANYTHING ELSE?!" Chazz shouted. "Us singing and dancing like a bunch of trained monkeys?! It's stupid! It's demeaning…"

"You can sing lead," Jaden said.

"It's showtime. FIVE, SIX, SEVEN, EIGHT!" Chazz said. The four lined up as they began tapping their feet in unison.

Unseen by them, a woman slunk through the crowd, face hidden by a mask and bandana. She looked around, looking for a place where she could get fuel, since her boat had run out. And those performers seemed to be drawing a crowd, meaning no one was present at the ship supply store.

Chazz: Good pals, blood brothers…

Me and three others…

The Chazz!

Jaden: Jaden!

Gumball: Gumball!

Luz: And me, Luz!

Jaden: Four friends, no closer!

Luz: Get mad? Heck no, sir!

Gumball: Not us, we're the four who's of who's!

Chazz: Four guys out hittin'

The waves of Lagoon Reef!

Four guys lookin' for an excuse…

Jaden: To just be lazy,

Or play like crazy!

Chazz: The Chazz!

Jaden: Jaden!

Gumball: Gumball!

Luz: And me, Luz!

Jaden: True friends, no phonies!

Me and my cronies…

Crowd: The Chazz!

Jaden!

Gumball!

And she's Luz!

Luz: Four bums, none better!

Not one go-getter…

Gumball: Why work when you can just grab a snooze?

Jaden: Folks say…

Chazz: "Hey, go earn a living in Lagoon Reef!"

Luz: "Grow up!"

Gumball: "Go and pay off your dues!"

Jaden: We say…

Gumball: "Tough noogie!"

Luz: "No way, let's boogie!"

Chazz: The Chazz!

Jaden: Jaden!

Gumball: Gumball!

Luz: And me, Luz!

The four then began dancing around. The woman looked around, seeing people gather around those four dancers.

"Excuse me? Hello?" she called, but they were all clapping and cheering along as Luz tossed a ball of light into the air. Jaden shook up a can before lobbing it at the light. The can exploded, sending out a shower as the light reflected into a rainbow. All the while, Gumball was passing around a straw hat.

Gumball: Now we're passing the cash hat in Lagoon Reef!

Crowd: Lagoon Reef!

For sailing on this musical cruise!

Jaden: That's our finale…

Chazz: Slackers, let's blow this alley!

The Chazz, Jaden, Gumball and who?

Luz: That's me, and now the cue's…

Jaden: Four guys sharin' the good neeeeewwwwws…

"We're…" Jaden said as the four stood in a line, thrusting their hands into the air with their index fingers pointed triumphantly towards the sky.

Chazz, Jaden, Gumball, Luz: The Chazz, Jaden, Gumball, and me Luz!

Chazz: The Chazz!

Jaden: Jaden!

Gumball: Gumball!

Luz: And me, Luz!

The masked woman, though, was unsuccessful in finding the owner of a shop that sold boating supplies. She muttered to herself as she found a tank full of boat fuel. She hoisted it up and began struggling to get it out.

"You'd better be able to PAY for that," said a voice. The girl turned to see a burly man with tattoos all over his arm. Clearly, this was the owner.

"Of course I can pay, I—" the woman searched her pockets. Nothing. She sheepishly laughed as she tried to explain the situation. "S-sorry, but I…"

Unfortunately, things took a sudden and dramatic escalation as the man grabbed her arm with one hand and pulled a knife with the other. "THIEF!"

Gumball, who had just gotten the hat back. Fairly full of money, too. He handed it to Jaden, who smiled at the amount in it. But then, he looked over and saw the owner of the boat supply store having cornered someone.

"Hey, what's going on there?" Jaden asked.

"Who cares? We got our cut, so none of our—" Chazz then noticed that Jaden was running over there, shoving the money hat into Gumball's hands in the process. "You gotta be kidding me!"

"Yo, knock it off," Jaden said, grabbing the shopkeeper's wrist and pulling it back.

"This thief was trying to steal from me! This is my right!" the shopkeeper snapped.

"I just forgot my wallet! If you let me go to the magistrate, I'll get it!" the woman shouted.

Jaden quickly thought how to get her out of this. He was irate, her excuse made no sense, and now, his friends were coming up. Right when Gumball and Luz got next to him, Chazz grabbed onto his neck. "WHAT were you thinking, you lousy slacker?!"

"I mean, almost spilled the money we got," Gumball said. "Who'd have thought pan-handling was that lucrative a career?"

"I know, it's amazing," Luz beamed.

That was when an idea hit Jaden. He took Chazz's hand and slowly lowered it. "Heh, sorry. You're right, Chazz. I should've kept a better eye on her. My bad."

"What?" the woman asked, perplexed.

"Just play along. Trust me, it'll help," Jaden whispered, giving her a wink.

"You know this rat?" the shopkeeper asked.

"Yep, we sure do!" Luz said. "Be crazy if we DIDN'T!"

"She's OUR sister!" Gumball said, hugging the woman from behind.

"Sister?" the man and woman asked, in shocked sync.

"Yeah, another one of us. Orphans adopted into one big, weird family," Gumball said.

"Foster sibs, all the way," Jaden said, giving the thumbs'-up. "But this one? She wandered off while we were singing and dancing. Crowds upset her. She's a little crazy"

"Excuse me?" the woman asked, offended.

"I tried keeping that from happening. Just wanted some…" Jaden said, looking around and seeing the tank. "Boat fuel."

"Yeah, but the boat's fine! So, we don't need it!" Luz exclaimed.

"She said she knew the magistrate," the shopkeeper said.

"Uh…" Jaden said before giving a confident laugh. "She thinks CHAZZ is the magistrate."

"Leave me out of this!" Chazz shouted.

Jaden gave the woman a nod. She immediately got the cue as she prostrated herself before Chazz. She then spoke in a loud, dramatic tone that Jaden knew was accompanied by the largest grin under her mask. "O' Mighty Magistrate! How may I serve you?"

Chazz glowered at Jaden, but then cleared his throat. "First, all your desserts for a month and ALL your rare cards…and I mean the GOOD ones! Not just the shiny ones!"

"Don't go too overboard there, Lord Magistrate," Luz snickered, patting his shoulder.

"But there's no REAL harm in her. So…no hard feeling?" Jaden asked as he handed the tank back.

"Just don't let it happen again," the shopkeeper scoffed, taking it back.

"We won't, trust me," Jaden said, taking the woman and helping her to her feet and gently leading her away. "C'mon, sis. Now we gotta go see the doctor…"

The woman then stopped in front of a poster of some event with the title "X92, coming this spring". She then said, in a light, dazed voice. "Hello, doctor, how are you?"

"No, not THAT ONE…" Jaden said as Luz and Gumball pushed her along. Chazz followed from behind, muttering darkly all the while.

They made their way back to the docks and, the moment they were in the boat, the woman burst out laughing. She was quickly joined by everyone except Chazz. Between laughs, she managed to wheeze out. "Tha-that was…THAT WAS GREAT!"

"Thank you, thank you," Jaden said with a bow. "Special thanks to Luz and Gumball for playing their roles so well. And, of course, Chazz!"

"Why didn't you make GUMBALL the magistrate?!" Chazz shouted.

"Gumball was magistrate last time," Jaden replied.

"Gotta get your role quick, Chazz. Or else yours gets assigned," Gumball said.

"How'd ya like to be buried at sea?!" Chazz shouted.

"So, where are ya wanting to go?" Jaden asked.

"Anywhere but here," the woman said.

"Anywhere but here, then," Jaden said as he started up the boat. In no time at all, they were speeding away, going back to Drift Island.

Doofenshmirtz panted as he ran on a treadmill, clad in a jogging outfit and sweating profusely. Between heavy panting, he managed to ask. "H-hey, Schmidt! Instead of this, couldn't we have ordered some double-A's or something?"

The reason for his exhaustion? The Fanmake-Inator. As he ran, power ran into it, causing it to warm up. Each successive rotation of the belt caused a crackle of electricity to pulse into the machine.

"Save your breath, Heinz. FASTER," Schmidt said as he placed the cube into the contraption. With a heavy whirring, the machine came to life as it glowed with eldritch energy.

"Sure thing, you're the boss!" Doofenshmirtz called before puffing and wheezing. "C'mon, Doof, feel the burn. You love the burn…"

As the machine powered up, a rod extended from it, crackling with magical blue light. Abeam then fired out, hitting the ceiling…or, more accurately, a large mirror on the ceiling. The refracted light then flew toward the floor, making it shine with an otherworldly light. Schmidt opened his arms in some kind of exaltation.

"Heart of the world," he said, speaking to the magical energy pulsating as it shifted into a large, transparent version of the massive, serpentine skeleton. "Reveal the one that can enter the Den of Tides…"

As soon as he finished speaking, the image shifted into a large, circular screen. It was of a boat approaching Drift Island, carrying five people—a blue cat, a girl with an owl-shaped staff, a young man with black hair, a woman with a concealed face, and another boy with brown hair. This made an evil smile spread across Schmidt's face.

"Yes…YES!" he said with vile glee. "There they are—the Treasure in the Tide!" The light began to slowly fade, but Schmidt's evil grin remained on his face. "I think Gantu's little search can be put on hold if he was to be given directions to his…favorite bilge rats."

"Oh, that's GREAT…" Doofenshmirtz said, his jogging pants having fallen to his ankles to show his heart-decorated boxers. His legs were slowing down as he was sweating up a storm. "Also, I'm burning through so many calories…and most of my hydration…"

At that point, Doofenshmirtz lost his footing and fell on the belt. After spinning through it for a few rotations, he was flung to the opposite wall. Slowly, he slid down with a dazed expression. "Curse you, Perry the Platypus…"

Schmidt, though, began to laugh maniacally. All the pieces for his ultimate design were falling into place…