He was never mine.

What was there to be mad about? I have no right to be angry. And I'm not. I shouldn't be frustrated, I shouldn't be jealous every time I see them together. But I am. I shouldn't feel like killing myself because I never tried. But I do. Is that so wrong?

Everyone considered them perfect for each other. Opposites attract, they say.It started with people helping her get closer to him. I ignored it. I thought he wasn't interested in her. But I thought wrong. She slowly crept her way into his heart.

She started with gathering information about him. Like an obsessed fan, his favorite color, food, his type of girl… she all researched on. I thought those facts wouldn't change a thing. But again… I was wrong. I've been wrong so many times I wonder if I walked under a million ladders and got bad luck without knowing it.

Giving him something that he loves and at the same time would remind him of her was probably one of her better ideas.

But I don't think that's what made him fall for her. I hope that wasn't it. I think he's just looking for someone to care for him. I would gladly be that someone. But no, I had to be anxious. I preferred to be his friend rather than go for something that I'm not even sure he feels too.

Our whole gang now has their own special someone…leaving him and me alone. Or at least he was, before she came along. Now… it's only me. But then again, I'm always the friend, never the lover. Is me falling in love so hard to believe? I am only human after all.

I've already mastered this mask. A mask of indifference, I probably got it from him. His face always looks like that. And why do I know? Since I can't stop looking at him. He's just so... What does it matter anyway? Being indifferent is the only way I could hide all the pain I feel. I know it sounds so cliché, but when you're in love with the wrong person at the wrong time, it's the only thing you could do.

Why can't I stop thinking about him? It's over. They're together now. But why is there still this tiny, little voice inside my head that tells me that I still have a chance? Could this be true? Stop it. False hopes never brought anyone good.

I'm sick of this. I'm sick of always seeing them together. I need to be alone. I need time to think...

I've already packed my bags. Oh yeah, I better wear my green sweater since I heard it's going to be awfully cold tomorrow morning. Should I bring my phone? Nah, it's probably best for me to abandon technology during my vacation. Anything else? Hmm. The only thing left to do is to tell him.

"Hey, I'm going away for a while. I already arranged for a substitute. The train leaves in an hour."

"Well, this is kind of sudden. But sure, go ahead, you're probably stressed."

"Thanks, bye."

"Maybe you should change your sweater, no offense but green isn't really your color Quistis."

I know.

Author's note: Are they a bit OOC? Corrections in spelling and grammar are welcome. Constructive criticism and praise are also welcome. Questions, comments and suggestions are also welcome.