Welcome to my random little Hollyoaks spoof!
This is basically just a little Vent on my behalf against all the
stooped characters in Hollyoaks.

So, yes, random little spoof.
Please R & R!

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Louise wakes up one morning and decided she should take a holiday. A permanent holiday – never to return to Hollyoaks ever again. She takes Sean with her, telling him "It'll be a good laugh." Stupidly, he agrees. He'll suffer the consequences for the remainder of his days.

Justin goes on holiday with the other Burton's. Everyone is glad to get two minutes peace from Liz Burton.

Whilst Justin's gone, Becca is 'accidentally' pushed off a cliff by…uh…Mandy. Yeah, Mandy. Mandy announces, "Oops," and then begins to file her nails. Jake, because – let's face it – he's not exactly the brightest bulb in the pack; presumes he just saw his wife Becca bungee jumping off the cliff. He decides it looks fun (despite the fact that Becca was screaming) and joins her. He takes a running jump off the cliff – and then remembers he has no rope. Bungee jumping without a rope – try it and die.

Unfortunately for Hollyoaks viewers, the Burton's return to the completely fictional town. Liz is all "look at me" – us usual, but we love her anyway! Sophie's just plain normal – annoying, isn't it? Mel has 'rediscovered happiness' and has quit drinking – 'cos she deserves it, bless her! So she's all happy and stuff, lucky her. Justin finds out Becca's dead and he's all "Nooooo!" – but after about five minutes he gets over it, because, well, he just does.

Mandy goes to prison for life. And not "life" the way the police say is "life" – like, twenty five measly years. ACTUAL life. So, she's gone! Woo hoo!

Jessica, realizing she's a complete fool who thinks she is the Queen of everything, decides that she doesn't want to be herself anymore. She has a personality transplant. She is now an okay…ish character.

Craig, believing himself to be a 'gangsta' (what's with him!) calls up Robert DiNero – whom eventually gets a restraining order on the kid. Can you blame him? Craig tries to turn 'Hollyoaks' into a really bad version of a 'gangsta show' – but the writer of the show are like "Screw that!" and boot Craig off the show.

Clare runs away. No excuse needed, we're just all happy that Creepy-tall-lady has gone! Max is sad but OB's all like "Cheer up, mate" – so he does.

Mel and OB get married and everyone's like "Yay!" Awww!

Those two stupid kids – Josh and Fletch, is it? Yeah, well. They go on a class trip to…a random mountain somewhere. The rest of the class return, leaving them there – so we no longer have to listen to their insane ramblings. Woo!

Jack and…uh…what's her name?...Frankie! That's the biscuit! They…uhm…do nothing. I like them. They can stay un-spoofed. Darren continues as normal, too. But he's all like: "Awwwww…I want to do something!" But the writers are like: "Shurrup, fool!" Then they slap him. Ah, well.

Olivia, Jez, Gilly and Mark…if he is in fact even still in the program anymore…are just mind-numbingly dull. Joe – who's just weird – gives them a crash course in how to be interesting. Unfortunately, it doesn't work – so they are sent off to America, where they can be used as Lab Rat's.

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And so end's my little 'How Hollyoaks should be' story. Thanks folks for reading!
Please, please, please review!

Oh, yeah. One last thing…chances are I've annoyed SOMEBODY with this parody.
It's a JOKE dude's! Please keep that in mind!