A/N: Sorry that each one is a little short! Again, thanks for your wonderful reviews , SparkyTAS, Andy the willow treem jshaw0624, Guest, dreamer, Woman of Letters, Amateur Bacon Cook, WyomingCowboy15, and middleagemanager. They were very encouraging. :)
"There's no other way!" Kristy said the next morning. It was cold out. Frost clung to the windows and wind buffeted the walls. "You have to go."
Legolas sat at the kitchen table, awake again, but still brooding over the 'doctor' incident. Hot air breathed from the vent in the wall and warmed his hands.
"I'm sorry. You just have to leave." Kristy was trying to explain. He had to be out of the apartment by evening. She was taking him to the shelter Reiner recommended. "My land lady has a monthly inspection of the apartment. You can't be here when she gets here. I'm not allowed to live with anyone but my dog."
Legolas looked at her, trying to decide what she was apologizing for. Kristine said 'sorry' so many times to him that morning, he'd somehow managed to guess its meaning. He appreciated the clothes she'd fit him with though. They fit nearly perfectly, and Legolas folded his hands on the kitchen table, dressed in a loose, dark cotton shirt and jeans.
"Here, eat some breakfast." She came over with a plate of pancakes.
"Lle hannon," he murmured.
Legolas stared at her as he chewed the strange, sweet cakes. Kristine was pacing constantly. Her face was flushed, and the messy bun on her neck kept coming undone. She was shoving pans and clattering dishes uselessly, like she wanted something to throw and could not. She was upset.
"Listen." Kris spun around, clutching a spatula dripping oil on the floor. "I-I really don't think you're a criminal or a serial killer, anything like that. I really don't. I…just can't help you anymore. Understand?"
Legolas paused.
Morning sun streamed into the kitchen. Lacy whispers of frost froze to the windowpanes and dripped from the eaves. Kristy was still in her pajamas. She'd slept in eyeliner, and there were now black smudges under her eyes. Tangled hair the color of bleached elm fell down around her face. Something was wrong, something happening today.
Somehow, Legolas had a feeling he knew what it was.
"I-I just don't know what else to do." She turned away. "I mean you can't stay here! My sister would think you're my boyfriend. My land lady, she already doesn't like me. She'd kick me out. I…"
Kris shook her head, pushing the hair out of her face. She tried to cook and wash dishes at the same time. It made a sudsy, sloppy mess.
"I'm sure you'll be fine at the shelter. Maybe they'll find a job for you. I don't know. Something. I j-just can't-" Kristy covered her face, breathing fast. She couldn't stop shaking. Why? Why did it feel like so much depended on this one decision? He was just someone, an anyone. It shouldn't matter! But-
But it did.
Legolas got up. "Kristine."
Kris spun around…before looking up in surprise. Legolas was there. She stared at him through her hair.
"You have done much for me, more than you know. I thank you for that."
"I-I don't understand you," she sniffed.
So Legolas reached up and cupped her flushed face in his hands.
Her turmoil was his fault. Legolas knew that without a doubt. He didn't know how, but he knew she was trying to say farewell. The thought of it…wandering strange city streets, knowing he didn't belong here, knowing nothing but his name and a language no one understood…it made a sick pit in his stomach. There were no trees, no stars. Legolas felt panic rise, uncontrollable fear. He felt sick. The thought made him want to vomit. But he didn't show that.
His face was a mask.
"Namaarie, Kristine," Legolas murmured.
"I…I guess that's goodbye?"
Legolas thought about it. "Goodbye."
And she nodded a little. He dropped his hand from her face and they regarded each other.
Somehow, days of caring for him, stroking his hair, worrying for a stranger she knew nothing about…it made Kristy feel attached to him. It was ridiculous. She shouldn't worry about him. He would be fine. He'd be happy. He just needed a little time, a little…
Oh, why bother? The guilt ate at her like a monster.
Legolas had no friends here. He had no place to go. He was going to be alone in the city. Somehow, the man knew what she was going to do, too. And yet he accepted it. He didn't want to be the cause of her troubles. It was selfless and heartbreaking.
Legolas tilted his head slightly, enough to look in her eyes. She was a strange little she-human. But hers was the only face he'd managed to imprint on his mind. She was familiar. He'd listened to her voice in a sick delirium for days.
"It seems I have little choice but to trust you, Kristine." He said more to himself than her. "I pray you make the right decision."
"I wish I knew what you were saying," Kristy mumbled in response, staring at the floor. "I guess I'll never know now."
Legolas just looked. The girl wouldn't meet his eyes.
"I-I should go get dressed."
And she finally made a move to leave. Legolas shifted aside. It was a very slow walk to her bedroom. She turned the stove off, wiped some spilled oil. She looked back once, twice, watching him stare after with a hollow, empty expression. It was all he could feel.
"I won't be long."
And she was gone.
Legolas collapsed into the nearest chair. Or fell. He didn't know. He didn't care. It felt like he lived this again and again, over and over. His emotions were confused and over-tossed, his past life like a dream. A dream you knew you had, yet just couldn't quite remember. It was growing increasingly frustrating.
And worse yet, he was leaving. He didn't know where, but he could stay no longer. What would happen to him then?
"Um…come on, I guess," Kristy said when she came out, buttoning her coat.
Legolas looked up. The black was washed from her cheeks and a tangled braid fell down one shoulder. The hair so often in Kristine' eyes was tucked neatly behind her ears. He sighed. Maybe wherever the woman planned to take him, they knew where the 'Woodland Realm' was, maybe how to get there. Maybe he could finally go home.
"We'd better get going. Want a good seat, right?" Kristy half-smiled. And then it faded. Oh…what's the use?
She spent the night staring at the wall, hating herself for what she planned to do. She hated herself for finding something she couldn't understand…wanted to understand, and for throwing it away before she could. But it wouldn't do any good. She felt like an ungrateful, miserable wretch. Nothing was going to change that.
"Here's your coat," she whispered, handing it to him. Legolas took it. He didn't need her to, but she slipped the buttons closed and the zipper up his chest. He'd never seen a zipper…It was fascinating.
He watched her instead. He wanted to know how and why, what she was doing to him. Why wherever they were going was where he should be. He stared at her every moment as she carefully, reluctantly tied the belt around his waist.
"Kay."
They didn't take the elevator. The power was on again, but Kristy decided on the stairs…all twenty five flights. It was easier going down than up anyway, and she was stalling. She knew it and she didn't care.
"It was nice having you here," Kristy said quietly as they walked. It didn't matter that he couldn't understand. "And-and I'm glad I met you."
Legolas looked over, and at her solemn expression, nodded slightly.
They walked the two miles to the homeless shelter in rush-hour traffic. A gust of cold air hit his face and he breathed it in. Legolas looked at it all with a keen, more focused eye. He saw what he thought were steel giants, and they were in fact, great buildings poking at the cloud line. The machines-cars, Kristine called them-came from nowhere and disappeared again in a constant, busy swarm.
It was all very chaotic.
"See when the light's red, then turns to green?" Kristy said, pointing at the streetlights and the signs.
Then, watching the colors change… Legolas realized it was not actually utter chaos. Signals and lights regulated them, told them when to stop and go. The shining black windows in the cold sunlight, the faces walking past, their eyes straight ahead…revolving doors spitting people out and swallowing them whole again…It was fantastic.
But it couldn't distract him long. He didn't want to be here. More than that, he didn't want to be here alone.
It was bringing back floods of feelings. Panic. He didn't want that again.
"I guess this is it?" Kristy asked, peering at a sign nailed to the wall.
Legolas looked at Kristine. She refused to look around long, afraid she'd change her mind.
Inside, there was a mass of people. Not shabby, homeless people typical of movies in fingerless gloves, gray coats and ripped hats. They were all fairly normal. And yet they all had one thing in common. They were alone and destitute. They carried bedrolls with them, looked at the world with empty, forgotten eyes. Those with cars ate in them. Families stayed together.
This was who the man was. It was where he belonged.
Right?
Legolas went inside. Folding tables and chairs cluttered the hard floor. People were everywhere. A line of thirty shuffled on their feet at the food counter. The menu was chicken and white macaroni. They talked constantly. They moved constantly.
"Next!"
Legolas wanted to cover his ears at the din they made. The clattering trays and shouting voices were like a cacophony of confusion. He looked around, rooted to the floor and barely able to believe his eyes. Oh Kristine. Legolas thought in horror. This is where you're taking me? What was this place? Where humans came to live their last…? Cough out a few more days of meager existence?
Kristy glanced around, feeling the guilt consume her completely. But it was no use. There was nothing else to do. Besides, this was where the man would be if she hadn't run into him! Surely, she'd helped him when she took him in. That was enough.
Slowly, Legolas shifted a few steps forward. He made himself do it, accepting but not fully realizing what was happening to him.
"Legolas…?" Kristy whispered.
He turned at his name, a brief hope flaring. She wasn't going to do this to him. Not yet. Not until he could learn something, remember, know where he was? Not until he could claw his way back to the surface and find a way back home?
But she was.
"Here's… some stuff," she said. "Um…toothbrush and some food, a flashlight. Stuff."
Legolas didn't even move. He just stared at her.
"Here's some money. It-it might help, when you need it." She tucked the bills in his coat pocket. Her heart pounded in her ears and she couldn't stop.
Why does he look at me like that? Kristy looked up at him. It's because you're a heartless monster. It was because he wouldn't show it, not yet, but Legolas knew just how selfish she was. Kristy knew it too, and she hated herself for it.
And Legolas turned away. There wasn't any point prolonging this.
"Legolas, I'm sorry," she said an instant before catching him and grabbing him in a forceful hug. She did her best, but it only ended up choking him. "I'm sorry." She whispered into his neck, "I really am! P-please take care of yourself."
If she was apologizing so fiercely, why did she do this to him? Legolas wondered fiercely. He wanted to ask her this. He didn't want to hug the damn thing. It was the last thing he wanted. He wanted answers! Legolas wanted someone to tell him how to go home, how to get away from here as fast and as easily as possible.
And so, Kristy pulled back and wiped her nose, dropping her head. Legolas just stared at her, before gently pushing her away.
"Go, if you must," he muttered. "I will not burden you further."
"Goodbye."
And then, Kristy strode out the door and didn't look back.
Legolas stood alone, a miserably small pack on the floor beside him. He was taller than the crowd, making him feel even more out of place. The noise of these homeless, eating people was constant. They filled his head with what they had…no pride, no hope, no way of going home. And suddenly, Legolas felt forlorn and abandoned.
It was disgraceful.
Kristy cursed bitterly walking home. She cursed when she slipped on the ice, when her elbows crashed into the pavement and she wanted to cry. She cursed even harder when she waved down a taxi and road home…warm, safe, secure. Kristy was a rat, an ungrateful selfish rat. That's exactly what she was.
She didn't deserve the things she had. Yes, she worked hard. She got somewhere by using what she had. She took responsibility for others, school, work. But she never could have done it alone. She had people…parents, friends, co-workers. Help!
Legolas had no one. And Kristy left him that way.
. . . . . . .