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Chapter Eleven


The eleventh thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me:

Stale TV Specials

(Batteries Not Included

No parking spaces

Dad, I gotta go to the bathroom!

Charities

She's a witch; I hate her!

Five months of bills!

Oh, I don't even KNOW half these people

Oh, who's got the toilet paper, huh?

Get a flashlight! I blew a fuse!

And finding a Christmas tree)


Beca flops down on her back and closes her eyes. What was that? Her bedroom is a thousand degrees right now. It's hotter than Hell – which is where she belongs as her mind travels back to Aubrey pinned beneath her and Chloe in the doorway watching. Thinking about one of them like that is bad enough – but both of them? At the same time? She's definitely going to Hell.

She tries to think of something else. Grabs her phone and pulls up one of Jesse's dick pics. But her mind keeps wandering back to Aubrey's lips. No doubt they're soft. Everything about Aubrey is perfect. Everything about Chloe is perfect too, just in a different way. And that's why Aubrey and Chloe are perfect for each other. That's why Beca should have just given them that battery and let them go for it. Apparently, they've already had sex! They're probably having sex right now. Without her. Which is good. It shouldn't be with her.

Beca doesn't want to have sex with them. Either of them. She has…photos of Jesse's penis. And half the point of nudes is to get off on them, right? Only as her hand creeps below the waistband of her pants, even staring at Jesse's photo, her mind keeps coming back to Chloe watching her pin Aubrey to the bed.

xxxxx

Don't think about Aubrey and Chloe. Don't think about Aubrey and Chloe. It's not helpful, because telling herself not to think about Aubrey and Chloe causes her to think about Aubrey and Chloe – but 'just think about Jesse's dick' wasn't helping much either. G1 Omega Supreme stabs her in the side. Seriously? Beca yanks her hands out of her pants to move him aside just in time, because the door swings open and Amy walks inside. "I thought you left." She should have locked the door. She needs to learn to lock the door. She was at least smart enough to keep her pants on.

Fat Amy doesn't answer. She just stretches her arms with a loud yawn then collapses face first onto her bed.

This is awkward. Beca sits up, blankets bunched up over her lap, and stares at her tree. This is her cue to just go take a shower. Of course when they have warm water again, she now needs it freezing cold.

xxxxx

"Beca!"

Beca pauses halfway down the hall on her way back to her bedroom with a cringe that she hopes can't be seen through Chloe's cracked open door. "Yeah?" she asks and backtracks a few feet.

"Come watch a movie."

"I was actually going to bed," Beca says – even though she's contemplating walking straight past her room to go downstairs.

"It's Christmas Eve Eve, Beca," Chloe replies, "It's meant for staying awake."

Christmas Eve Eve

"Come on, Beca. Aubrey's falling asleep."

"I am not," Aubrey replies indignantly, "I was resting my eyes, waiting for you to hurry up and start the movie."

"I was waiting for Beca to get out of the shower," Chloe says.

"She doesn't even want to watch it, Chloe. Just press start."

"Come on, Beca, we always watch It's A Wonderful Life on Christmas Eve Eve," Chloe tries to convince her.

Do they? They definitely watch it every year, but it never occurred to Beca that it was always in the same night. "Isn't it supposed to be Aubrey obsessed with tradition?" she asks, pushing the door open. She can't even look at Aubrey, but she's sure if she could she would see Aubrey glaring at her.

Chloe pats the spot beside her.

Beca sits near the bottom of the bed, only for Chloe to grab her arm and pull her closer to wrap an arm around her. Still, it's better than sitting next to Aubrey. She sneaks a glance at her – and, whether Aubrey is accepting it on not, she is indeed falling asleep. Her head is on Chloe's shoulder and she's barely holding her eyes open even as Chloe starts the movie. Beca gives her fifteen minutes max. Good.

"This is great," Chloe says, "The three of us, together, wearing matching Christmas as pajamas, watching a movie."

"Why can't our Christmas tradition be watching a happier movie?" Beca asks.

"This is a classic," Aubrey snaps.

Beca presses her lips together to stop herself from saying anything else.

"What were you thinking?" Chloe whispers in her ear, "One of those cheesy romantic Hallmark movies?"

Beca had been thinking something more like The Grinch. She just gives Chloe a tight smile then turns her attention to the TV.

xxxxx

Beca and Chloe had been right about Aubrey falling asleep. No more than ten minutes after the movie starts, she lets out a tiny groan and lays down with her head on Chloe's lap.

"Are you okay?" Chloe asks.

Aubrey nods.

Beca has to hand it to her; she's a lot better at holding her alcohol than she is at holding her anxiety. She looks away as Chloe slides her hand under Aubrey's shirt and the small of her back becomes visible. And then Chloe is suddenly rubbing her arm along with Aubrey's back, and the movie becomes a bit of a blur. "Do you need water?" she asks and moves to get up, "I need a cup of water."

"Aubrey, hey." Chloe helps her sit up then ease herself down onto of the pillows. She covers her up then gets up to join Beca on her way to the kitchen – which is not what Beca had meant. But she can't exactly tell Chloe no. She should have told her she had to pee. …but there's a slight chance Chloe might have tried to follow her there too. "So what's going on between you and Aubrey?"

"Nothing. I tripped and she happened to be there."

"So you tripped and your hand just fell into her vagina…"

"Yes."

"And your lips just sort of stopped centimeters away from each other?"

Okay, that may have taken some deliberate effort on their part.

"Maybe I should have given Tom the benefit of the doubt when he said he accidentally had sex with another woman."

"Are you enjoying yourself right now?" Beca asks as she pulls two glasses down from the cupboard.

Chloe leans against the counter and nods. "I just don't understand why Aubrey gets to have all the fun."

"I'm not sure that constituted as a good time for Aubrey." Beca offers her a glass of water.

"But it did for you?"

Chloe is drunk too; Beca is sure of it. "I mean – who wouldn't want to top Aubrey?" she deadpans.

"I prefer it when Aubrey is on top."

"I'm sure Aubrey prefers it too." Were they really discussing this? "Why am I still holding both cups of water?"

Chloe leans forward and kisses her – not hard, just enough that their lips barely brush together, just enough that Beca can feel it. When she pulls back, she gives Beca an inquisitive look.

"Am I supposed to rate who was better?" Beca jokes in the immediate panic, "Because Aubrey touched my boob and let me put my hand between her legs."

"If this is a competition with Aubrey, I'm definitely going to lose," Chloe says, "But if you just want to do some casual comparison, you know where to find me." She winks.

"I don't feel comfortable casually comparing in your bed while Aubrey is unconscious," Beca calls after her, "She needs to be awake for that. Oh my god, stop talking, Beca."

The kitchen light turns on and Beca spins around to see Stacie standing several feet away.

"I took one of those Buzzfeed quizzes asking which Christmas Hallmark character I'd be," Stacie says, "And it said I would be the Magical Matchmaker. Do you ever think about how creepily on point those things are?"

"The only thing creepy right now is you sitting in the kitchen in the dark listening to my conversations," Beca replies.

"I came down here for water." Stacie plucks one of the cups from Beca's hand, "Thanks." She turns to walk backwards so she's still face Beca. "Everyone placed bets on which one would be your gay awakening. Imagine when I tell them it's both."

"Well, you try choosing between them!" Damn it. "Because it's not either! I don't wear nearly enough flannel to be a lesbian."

"Most of your closet is plaid."

"Joke's on you, because plaid is a pattern and flannel is a material – which is a fact many, many straight people know."

"You're welcome!" Stacie turns and disappears up the stairs.

xxxxx

"We're going to forget this happened." Beca sits back down on the bed and passes Chloe the glass of water she originally poured for herself. "This entire week was never real. I feel like I'm going through the Twelve Days of Christmas, but every day is a new trauma."

"Next year, it'll be A Christmas Carol," Chloe teases.

"I will die."

"I thought you were ready to be a ghost hunter," Chloe replies, "The ghosts of Christmas Past, Present, and Future don't count?"

"I'm going to die so I can be one of the ghosts. I see no reason I have to be Scrooge."

"I don't think you can die and just become a ghost of Christmas."

"My dad said I can be whatever I want as long as I have a college degree first. So if that happens, yes, I will die and become a Christmas ghost."

"See, this is why you would have to be Scrooge," Chloe says.

Beca settles back against the wall, "It's torture enough that I have to watch these movies; the last thing I want to do is live them."

"At least you'd have an idea about what happens next." Chloe rests her head against Beca's shoulder. "How things end."

Beca isn't even sure how whatever is happening right now started – but she blames that stupid tree.

"You know we're so watching A Christmas Carol after this."

"I figured that."