Disclaimer: I do not own anything off the show Inuyasha or the manga, nor do I own EIB or any of the talk radio hosts in this story or the people in real life I mention
The Three Things
Inuyasha was in a thoughtful mood ever since that lunch when he met Kagome. She was a sweet girl; if she weren't the daughter of a conservative senator his father might have praised him for meeting such a girl. Inuyasha wondered what he should get Kagome to do for him. He was pleasantly surprised when not long after he left her in a daze in the hall way she strolled in, apparently they had several classes together even though she was a junior and him a senior but that had to be because she was smart and they had some electives together.
They had first block together, which is where he first saw her it turns out and why she looked familiar before, and they had fourth fifth and sixth together. They spent all afternoon in school together and she was friendly to him. She told him all about everyone she knew and never said a mean word about anyone. She seemed pretty social which was no surprise, she was a nice girl.
Inuyasha told her a little about himself seeing as she seemed so willing to tell him everything that harbored in her soul, especially her opinions. Having grown up in a liberal atmosphere, Inuyasha had some liberal viewpoints but he didn't tell her about his opinions for the sake of their young friendship. He told her about his hobbies, like racing, sword fighting, and fixing up cars. Kagome was impressed by Inuyasha and she hung on his every word which gave Inuyasha a sense of importance.
After sleeping on it, Inuyasha decided what he wanted to ask of Kagome, three simple things that would shock the young girl.
Kagome was walking to the studio for her half hour of news, she loved talking on the radio. If she doesn't become a Congressman then she would want to be a radio host like her heroes: the Godfather, the High Priest of the Church of Painful Truth, and Baby Jesus. Kagome was reading over the papers for the broadcast when two strong arms wrapped in dark violet slipped around her petite waist. Kagome eeped and jumped slightly.
She stopped in an instant and turned to look up at a smirking hanyou. She felt her cheeks flush and wondered why he was off school grounds. 'Does he have a work pass?' she wondered.
"I've come to claim what you owe me for your debt." He said with a grin.
Kagome blinked a few times and turned in his arms to face him. "Why didn't you tell me in first block? I have to get to the studio." Kagome said with a slight frown. Inuyasha didn't bother asking what she meant by studio.
"I didn't want anyone hearing what I want you to do for me." He said simply. When Kagome looked at him suspiciously he pressed on. "I want you to do three things for me." He said holding up three fingers.
Kagome nodded and said without a second thought. "Whatever you want me to do I'll do it I promise." She said seriously.
Inuyasha blinked at her in surprise. "But you don't even know what I want yet…" he said with a frown. When Kagome shrugged he explained. "I could demand you come into that ally with me and let me fuck your brains out and you would have to go against your word." He said with a smirk as he indicated an ally they were standing in front of. Kagome's face went ten shades of red and she sputtered.
"I! Um…I-I…would d-do it i-if that's what you w-want, I wont go against my word." She finished sternly. Inuyasha gave her a feral grin which sent a shudder down her spine.
"Maybe some other time when I save your life but I have some other things in mind for this time." He said. "The first thing I want is for you to help me get a job." Said Inuyasha seriously.
Kagome looked at him for a minute and grinned. "Alright! Do you know anything about computers and electronics?" asked Kagome.
"Yeah I learn that stuff pretty quickly why?" he asked.
"Well the on call technician needs an assistant, he says he's willing to train one during my thirty minutes on air and you can start work right after school. Why do you want a job any way?" asked Kagome.
"I want my old man to get the hell off my back for once, which brings me to request number two." He said holding up two clawed fingers. "I want you to pretend to be my steady girlfriend while I date around." Kagome stared at him like he had lost his mind.
"WHAT!" she screeched.
Inuyasha rolled his eyes in annoyance. "My old man and mom have been harping on me to get a serious girlfriend or they will take my car away. Don't worry you wont have to sleep with me or anything just pretend to be my girlfriend at my house and when I go on "dates" with other girls you are the girl my parents see while really the other wench will be in the car. Understand?" he asked evenly, when Kagome nodded in agreement hesitantly he quickly added something. "But you have to use another last name though…maybe your mom's maiden name." Said Inuyasha, and when Kagome asked why he told her to not ask questions.
"Fine fine, that all seems reasonable. What is the last thing you want?" asked Kagome.
"I want you to be my queen bee." Inuyasha said with a grin.
"Your what?" Kagome bawked in confusion.
"My queen bee! You know, the girl that knows every other girl in the school. You hook me up with your hot friends and help me seduce them." He said dropping the mother of all requests on the poor girl.
"WHAT! You want me to help you get my friends in bed with you?"
"Well…yeah." He said with a shrug. "A guy's gotta get laid." He said off-handly. Kagome looked down at the sidewalk with a blank stare and felt a strange tugging on her heart strings. 'Why do I care if he wants to sleep with other girls…it's not like we're dating…we're just friends…'
"Fine, but only girls that I am acquaintances with, not my close friends you hear?" Kagome threatened not too convincingly. Inuyasha gave her a fanged grin.
"Yeah sure! Now are we going to the station to get me that job now?" asked Inuyasha. Kagome nodded and began to walk towards the station again with the hanyou right behind her.
"Hello Kagome." Said the Godfather as she entered the studio, Inuyasha eyes the older man before him suspiciously. "You missed your starting time so I'm having another intern do it. They aren't as good as you though." He said with disappointment in his voice. Kagome laughed nervously.
"Im sorry. My friend here wanted me to bring him along. He wants to apply for the assistant technician job." Kagome said indicating the hanyou. The Godfather looked at Inuyasha and reached out to shake his hand with a smile. Inuyasha took his hand and gave it a firm shake.
"Im Rush Limbaugh."
"Inuyasha Sano." Inuyasha said, automatically recognizing the man from his experiences with his father. Rush Limbaugh was absolutely HATED by the Left. Inuyasha then recognized another man who came in followed by a man dressed in the uniform for a technician. The handsome man he recognized was Sean Hannity.
"Hey Baby Jesus!" Kagome laughed hugging the man who laughed and hugged her back. Kagome introduced Inuyasha to Sean Hannity and then the technician, Tototsai. "So can he have the job?" asked Kagome hopefully.
Tototsai scratched his balding head for a minute, his large eyes seemed confused by what was going on. "Yeah, he'll do. Come with me young man I have just enough time to give you the tour before you have to go back to school. Later on today come here to fill out paper work and to get started." Said Tototsai, leading the scowling hanyou out of the room.
Kagome watched them leave then turned to her two heroes. "He looks familiar…" said Baby Jesus with a speculative look.
The Godfather gave a hearty laugh and nodded. "He looks a tad bit like Senator Takahashi doesn't he?" Kagome listened to them curiously but wasn't really sure who Takahashi was, she wasn't that knowledgeable.
"Well I'm going to go do some research for you since I have some time before lunch ends." Kagome said and bowed to the two men as she departed to a deeper room in the studio.
"That was Takahashi's son wasn't it?" Baby Jesus said to the Godfather. The Godfather nodded sagely and sighed.
"That poor girl is going to get her ears yelled off by her father for fraternizing with the enemy." Said the Godfather.
"Should we warn her or her father?" asked Baby Jesus.
"Neither for now, let's tell F-Lee Levin." Suggested the Godfather, referring to an infamous lawyer named Mark Levin. Baby Jesus nodded and proceeded to the control room to talk to the people who ran the show.
Inuyasha learned a lot about the studio from Tototsai. He learned that it started up more than 10 years ago and that they took on the Godfather as a talk show host, not knowing he would become the number one listened to host on all the air waves. The EIB network was famous for Rush Limbaugh and occasionally had Sean Hannity also called Baby Jesus by other hosts, F-Lee Levin, and the High Priest of the Church of the Painful Truth, a man named Neal Boortz who wasn't a Republican but a Libertarian.
Inuyasha also learned more about Kagome's passion for politics and about how she came to be at the studio as an intern. Inuyasha didn't ask Tototsai to talk so much but the man was a little out of it and seemed to be rambling. Inuyasha got the tour and promised to show up after school for the paper work and his first day. Kagome saw that Inuyasha was done and they went back to school, with Inuyasha carrying her on his back.
"Inuyasha?" Kagome whispered harshly as she poked the sleeping boy. Inuyasha grunted and shifted away from her a little. Kagome rolled her eyes. "Baka…" she grumbled and decided on another way to wake the young man. Kagome leaned up a little to a doggy ear and lightly blew breath into it, making it twitch slightly. "Inuyasha…" she whispered in the more enticing voice she could. Inuyasha murmured something and shifted a little. "Inuyasha, want to watch me take a bath?" Kagome whispered seductively. When Inuyasha jerked awake and looked around in alarm Kagome burst into giggles.
"What! Don't tell me you were joking! I was dreaming about joining you in the shower and so I wake up hoping for the real thing but you deny me? Youre such a fucking tease Kagome!" Inuyasha said with a smirk. Kagome blushed crimson and lightly smacked his arm as she stood up. Inuyasha looked around and saw that most of the class had already left to go home.
"Inuyasha, want to come to my house again and do homework after work?" asked Kagome hopefully, even though it was pretty much a given that he would seeing as he'd come over every night since they met 6 months ago.
Inuyasha nodded as he packed his books. "Yeah, I dumped Eri today so you'll need to figure out what girl I'm going out with next." Inuyasha said with a smirk.
Kagome flinched a little at his words. 'Right, just a queen bee.' Kagome thought bitterly. She forced a smile and quickly strode out of the class room leaving her best friend to follow behind.
Inuyasha landed in front of the large house Kagome lived in. It wasn't that far from the studio but it was an excuse to carry the petite girl on his back. Inuyasha let her slide off, enjoying the feel of her soft curves on his hard muscular back. Kagome reached into her side bag and pulled out her key. They went inside and after greeting Mrs. Higurashi they went to Kagome's room.
"Alright, so who is the next victim?" asked Inuyasha with a fanged grin. Kagome glanced up at the hanyou and began to take out her homework. Inuyasha noticed that she was upset about something and plopped down beside her on the bed, "What's wrong kitten?" he purred using his nickname for her. Kagome blushed and looked away. Inuyasha always knew how to get her blood pumping.
Kagome gulped loudly and tried to shift away from him, but he just shifted closer again. "I don't want to set you up with any more people…" Kagome whispered with a frown. Inuyasha observed her silently and nodded.
"No problem, I'll just fuck Kikyo." He said. Kagome looked up at him sharply.
"What?"
"Some girl at school came up to me and hit on me. The slut looks easy so I'll date her. You've repaid the debt overall so you don't have to keep setting me up." Inuyasha said with a smile. Kagome felt a cold feeling in the pit of her stomach.
"You just don't understand!" she shouted in frustration. Inuyasha stared at her in surprise as she stood up and stomped out of the room. Inuyasha followed with a slight frown on his handsome face.
"What? Why are you mad?" asked Inuyasha, he had a hunch but he wanted to hear her say it.
Kagome flinched and glanced at the clock, it was 10:00 pm. "It's getting late you need to go." Kagome grumbled.
"Why cant I spend the night again?" asked Inuyasha.
"Because." Kagome glared.
"Because why?" growled Inuyasha back.
Kagome groaned in frustration. "Because I don't want to talk to you." Inuyasha stared at Kagome stunned as she forced him to turn around and pushed him out of her room. She slammed the door and flopped on her bed. She didn't want to cry in front of her best friend, she didn't know that Inuyasha was still just outside the door and could smell her tears.
Inuyasha let out a defeated sigh, it wouldn't be much of a walk to his house seeing all he had to do is jump over the house behind Kagome's and cross the street. By the second day of knowing Kagome he discovered how close they lived to each other. Inuyasha decided to wait outside her room until she wanted to talk. He sat against the wall with his arms resting lazily on his knees. His head rested back against the wall as he continued to listen to Kagome inside the room.
Mrs. Higurashi walked by with a women's dress suit on and her hair done up elegantly. "Hello puppy." She teased as she gave Inuyasha's ear a slight tweak. Inuyasha tried to suppress a growl as he pulled away from her hands.
"No offense Mrs. H but only Kagome can call me that, and touch the ears." He quickly added as she eyed the furry appendages. Mrs. H gave a fake pout and nodded in understanding.
"So why are you out here?" she asked him.
"Kagome's mad at me." Inuyasha said jabbing a thumb at the closed door. Mrs. H nodded sadly.
"I knew this day would come…well I better be going Inuyasha, my husband has a big social event to attend for the NRA and I have to be there so I'm just going to leave you two alone so you can make up." Mrs. H winked suggestively and departed. Inuyasha felt his cheeks heat up a little but kind of wished they COULD make up like that.
Kagome got up from her bed and sighed. "I need to stop being a baby. Inuyasha hates girls who are whiney. I'll just have to accept that he doesn't like me like that…" Kagome forced the next onset of tears back and went to a mirror to make her look normal for when she went to Inuyasha's to apologize for over reacting.
Kagome sighed and went to the door. She opened it to see Inuyasha sitting there against the wall. She gasped when she realized that he had heard her crying and possibly what she said when she was talking to herself. Inuyasha looked up at her with a slight scowl which she knew meant he was concerned for her. Kagome forced a smile and sat down beside Inuyasha against the wall.
"I'm sorry puppy…" she whispered. Inuyasha's ears twitched on top of his head and he lightly nudged her with his arm.
"Why are YOU sorry…I'm the one that did something…" Inuyasha said.
Kagome gave him a flat look. She had the feeling that he didn't even know what he did. "What did you do?" asked Kagome.
Inuyasha blinked a few times and then looked away from her. "I don't know why you're mad…but I know that I SHOULD know…you're my friend…maybe even my best friend." Inuyasha said gruffly, trying not to sound all soft and mushy.
Kagome got a large smile at his words, she felt warmth fill in the coldness her body felt and she threw her arms around a surprised Inuyasha. "You're my best friend too! I know we've only known each other for about 6 months but I feel so much closer to you than anyone else!" Kagome said happily. Inuyasha looked at the girl and got a slight smile; he returned the hug and then stood up. As he helped her up she said something that immediately struck him with insane guilt. "You are so honest with me! Sometimes I feel like all my other friends at school are just pretending or something but with you everything feels natural. I know you'd never lie to me." Kagome said warmly. Inuyasha looked away and began to walk towards the front door of her house.
Inuyasha had told all his teachers to call him by his mom's maiden name, Sano but he didn't know how long he could keep his secret from Kagome. He knew that she wouldn't care now but knowing he had lied to her all this time…she might just stop being his friend. 'I'm the one pretending with her…she really is my best friend. Even Sango and Miroku in my grade aren't as close friends with me as Kagome.' He thought, Sango and Miroku being two people Kagome introduced him to and they sometimes hanged out when Kagome wasn't around to be with. They weren't too bad probably the only other friends he had besides Kagome.
"Kagome…there is something I need to tell you…" Inuyasha said seriously. He turned to face the innocent girl who stared up at him expectantly. "I…um…I" he stumbled as he looked at her, she was so happy after his confession that she was his best friend…he didn't think it was a good time to tell her. "My…parents won't be home tonight, they are going to some convention…" Kagome interrupted him excitedly.
"Oh! Are they going to the NRA thing my parents are going to?" she asked.
'No, they are going to some tree-hugging convention.' He thought. "Yeah I think that is where they are going. Anyway, I was wondering if you'd want to spend the night at my house…" Inuyasha suggested smoothly. Kagome blushed and nodded slowly. She had never spent the night at his house, he did at hers once or twice but it was never her going to his place.
"Sure…just let me pack some stuff and leave a note saying I'm at Sangos…I don't think my parents would like me staying at a boy's house…" Kagome scampered into her room happily leaving Inuyasha alone to think.
'I'll tell her tonight…I hope she won't hate me for lying to her…' he thought.
A/N: Hey, things are going to get interesting next chapter…shrug im too tired to tease you with a possible lemon so bye now.