Well, everyone, it's here. The long-awaited final chapter of "Paranormal Events". I'm already planning a sequel to this, since it garnered such an audience. Partial credit goes to Rocksunner (unless he changed his penname) for inspiring this story and this series. I'd also like to thank all of those who reviewed and helped me make this story better. Before we dive into the last chapter, I'd just like to say that I'll be posting some more ASOUE fiction this summer and fall before moving into a different fanbase. (I'll still be posting ASOUE stuff, just not as frequently.) Planned ASOUE stories include a Hooky romance story (sort of), A songfic of Violet's life if Olaf's marriage plan had worked, a series of four Christmas stories, A story of what truely happened to Ike, A story based on the board game by Viacom and Mattel, A future life tale involving the return of Olaf and Violet being seriously hurt, and more. The aforementioned different fanbase I'll be working on late this Fall and Winter is "The Nightmare Before Christmas", so Tim Burton fans have something to look forward to as well. THAT little area of work will contain the story of a girl (I didn't say FANgirl.) entering Halloween Town and helping Jack out with something (You'll see...), A Jack/Sally Songfic, and A reflect fic that shows the possible origins of our favorite skeleton. For now, however, just sit back, relax, and enjoy this last chapter. Oh, and Happy April Fool's Day!
"Aunt Josephine!" the children shouted in unison. "You're alive!"
"Oh, Children, I knew that you'd figure out my note! You're all so brilliant..." She paused to wipe tears from her eyes. "Now, come along, we must get the supplies out of your boat."
"Supplies?" Sam asked.
"What supplies?" Danny asked.
"You wanted us to bring supplies?" Tucker quieried, which is a fancy word for "asked."
"Well, of course," Aunt Josephine said matter-of-factly. "How else do you expect us to live here if we don't have food?"
"Live here!" Sam asked, confused and annoyed. " We can't live here! You have to come back to town with us so everyone knoews that Vlad is lying!"
"I don't think so," Aunt Josephine replied, shuddering at hearing that vile man's name. I'm not going to have anything to do with that terrible man, and neither are you! I'm staying right here." The orphans sighed. Their aunt's mind was clearly made up, and when her mind was made up, she could be as stubborn as a mule, a phrase that has nothing to do with donkeys but instead meant that she was simply not going to do what the children had asked. Danny, however, had a trick up his sleeve. It was not a nice thing for him to do, but at this point, it was necessary, and of course 'nice' and 'necessary' are two totally different words and things.
"You know, Aunt Josephine," he said, knowing that his aunt would be scared out of her wits, "Curdled Cave is for sale."
"So?" their aunt said.
"So," Sam continued, picking up on Danny's idea, "Soon, people will come to look at it, and some of those people will be..." Here she paused for dramatic effect, then said in the most menacing voice she could muster "Realators."
Aunt Josephine's eyes grew wide with terror. "Okay," she said. "I'll go."
"Oh, dear," Aunt Josephine said, staring down into the lake's murky depths.
"My God, Aunt Josephine," Sam said in an exasperated - the word 'exasperated' here means "thoroughly tired of her aunt's ridiculous behavior" - tone, "What could possibly be wrong now?"
"We've just entered the territory of the Lachrymose Leeches."
"The WHAT?" Tucker's robotic voice asked in the most confused tone that it could.
"The Lachrymose Leeches," Aunt Josephine exlpained, "Are the number one killers of swimmers in this area, and how i became widowed."
"But leeches usually feed on blood, don't they? They normally don't hurt people.
"Not the Lachrymose Leeches. They eat flesh. They have several rows of very sharp teeth and an even sharper sense of smell, and if they smell food on a swimmer, they'll swarm." At this, Aunt Josephine shuddered.
The orphans glanced into the water nervously.
"I'm certain that the storm's driven them away," Sam said, sounding braver than she felt.
There are times when people can be correct, but this was not one of them. For as soon as Sam finished her sentance, there was a rippling on the smooth, glassy surface of the lake, causing the boat's occupants to gasp in terror. Aunt Josephine was too frightened to speak, but Sam yelled "Oh, my God!" as a large cluster of writhing, worm-like creatures surrounded the small boat.
"Relax, Sam," Danny said in a rather panicked voice, "They can't even get in the boat. See?" He pointed to one leech who was trying unsuccessfully to leap into the boat and get at its panicked meal. Suddenly, the entire crowd stopped jumping and swam off.
"What are they doing?" Tucker asked.
"They look like they're leaving," Sam said. "Perhaps they've seen something else more appetizing than a small wooden boat."
I'm sorry to say that Sam was wrong yet again, and could do nothing but scream as she watched in horror at the swarm redirecting back towards the boat and ramming into it at full force with an almighty THWACK! A group of five leeches had been swimming so fast that they jumped clear over the side, landing in the floor of the vessel, except for one, which landed right on Aunt Josephine's arm and viciously began to chomp on her arm. She squealed in pain and horror, trying vainly to shake the leech off of her. Danny shot a searing blast of energy at the loathsome creature, burning it to a crisp and causing it to drop to the floor.
Aunt Josephine whimpered as the area where the leech had bitten her began to bleed profusely, causing the leeches outside and on the boat's floor to whip into a frenzy and swim off to ram the boat again. Danny took care of the remaining four leeches inside the boat, then prepared for the next attack.
"Good idea, Danny!" Sam said. "Keep blasting them. Maybe you can break up the swarm."
This idea worked for all of two seconds until the leeches wised up and simply dodged Danny attempts to get rid of them. "Crap," He muttered.
Suddenly, Sam yelled "Boat!" causing everyone to start frantically waving in the other boat's general direction.
If you have gotten this far in the story, I must assume that you know whatever happens next will not be pleasent, and you would, unfortunately, be correct, for as the boat reached the orphans, the group could see that the boat's sailor was none other than Count Vlad.
"Well, well, well," Vlad said, approaching menacingly. "Hello again, children. It would seem that you are in a bit of trouble. And Josephine, what a pleasent surprise." Aunt Josephine cringed as Vlad said her name. Without thinking, Danny stepped on board of Vlad's boat and pulled his aunt and siblings on.
The phrase "Between the Devil and the deep blue sea" is a common phrase which here means "Stuck in two troubling circumstances at once, and horribly terrified of both of them." Unfortunately, this phrase fits the circumstances of the Fenton orphans' predicaments perfectly, because between the devilish man that had tormented them for what seemed like their entire lives and the deep blue lake filled with hungry, annoyed leeches, the children and their aunt were absolutely terrified. Their aunt, however, was the only one taking her fear to the extreme.
"Please don't hurt me!" she whimpered. "You can have the fortune and the children, just please leave me alone!"
The children stared at her in horror, but Aunt Josephine was far too panicked to care what happened to the orphans at this point.
"I'll have to think on that," Vlad said, looking at Aunt Josephine as if he had already made up his mind. "I supposed I don't have to throw you to the leeches down there."
Aunt Josephine was terribly frightened, but was never too scared to correct someone's grammar. "It's 'suppose'," she said in a defeated tone.
"What?"
"You said 'I supposed I don't have to throw you to the leeches.' You should have said suppose."
Vlad became very livid for a moment, then smiled a chilling smile. "Thank you," he said, "For correcting me." With one hand, he sailed further from the Fentons' ruined boat, and, with the other hand, he pushed Aunt Josephine into the deep blue lake and the devils within its depths.
In all of my research - and in all of my near escapes with the leeches - I have never found Aunt Josephine's body or the lifejacket that wore, but the orphans did not know what was to become of her as they sailed away with Count Vlad in his boat, and all they could do was watch as their aunt became smaller and smaller and eventually shrank from view beneath the lake's murky waves.
"How dreadful," Mr. Poe said, shaking his big, empty head. "I'm terribly sorry that happened. Aunt Josephine seemed like a good guardian for you three."
The children had pulled up on shore and Vlad was about to drive off with them when Mr. Poe showed up to check on them. Vlad had told Mr. Poe a terribly phony sob story of how he rescued the children from the leeches (with much protest from the children, of course), but couldn't save their aunt. Mr. Poe, being the complete moron that he was, fell for this fish tale hook, line, and sinker.
"But he pushed her overboard!" Tucker protested.
"Why, Tucker, I had no idea that you could imitate a mechanical-sounding voice like that!" Mr. Poe said, clearly missing Tucker's point.
"Poor dears," Vlad said in mock sympathy. "They have been through quite an ordeal; it's no wonder they're dilusional."
"We are not dilusional!" Sam yelled, outraged. "Vlad pushed our aunt overboard and would've just as soon done the same to us!"
"You don't have proof of that," Vlad said under his breath.
"They don't," Danny said, "But I do." With that, he reached into his jean pocket and pulled out a tape recorder.
"What's that?" Mr. Poe asked.
"Danny sighed and shook his head. Adults could be so stupid at times. "This is a recorded conversation of Vlad talking to our aunt on the phone. Yes, I tapped the phone." He looked at Tucker and smiled. "On it is also a snippet of the conversation while we were in the boat of Vlad before he pushed our aunt overboard." Danny pushed rewind and then play, and vlad's unmistakable voice talked with their aunt's quite clearly through the speakers.
You WILL write this suicide note, or you shall be joining your husband at the bottom of the lake.
Oh, Al-al-alright... There was a sigh followed by the scratch of a pen on paper and the sound of Aunt Josephine tacking the note to the table.
You will NOT tell a soul about this, especially NOT those orphans.
Aunt Josephine whimpered, then responded with a single yes, sir.
Danny fast forwarded to the next portion.
I'll have to think on that. I supposed I don't HAVE to throw you to the leeches down there.
It's 'suppose'.
What?
You said 'I supposed I don't have to throw you to the leeches.' You should have said 'suppose'.
A long, awkward silence ensued for a few moments, then was broken by Vlad's chilling voice saying Thank you for correcting me.
Sounds of squealing, splashing, and chomping were heard.
Mr. Poe gasped and lead the children away from Vlad.
"You children were right!" he said. "I'm calling the police!"
"You're forgetting one thing," Vlad countered.
"And what is that?"
"You're forgetting, my dear Mr. Poe," Vlad spat, "That I can run faster than you."
With that, Vlad ran as fast as he could, Mr. Poe in pursuit, but the children soon found that what Vlad had said was true. Mr. Poe was just too out of shape and too heavy to chase down notorious villains. He collapsed onto the ground, panting heavily.
"I'll be back for you, orphans!" Vlad yelled. "I'll be back when you least expect it. Every good actor returns for an encore!" Vlad laughed cruelly and jumped into his car, driving like a maniac away from the scene of the crime.
The orphans sighed at the prospect of Vlad having escaped for a third time to return another day and torment them. Again, they knew, they would move, and again he would show up and ruin their lives. For how many more times, they did not know. But there was one thing that they DID know. They had each other. Danny had his powers, Sam had her talent with reaserch and words and her unbreakable spirit, and Tucker had his mechanical prowess. Together, they thought, we can beat anything. Together, they thought, we can beat the odds, and we will survive.
There are times, dear reader, when a person can be down on themselves and others, and there are times when everything goes very wrong, both of which the Fenton orphans knew all too well. But everyone has their strengths and weaknesses, and although Vlad seemed strong now, the orphans knew that inside he had an a Achillies' Heel, a phrase which here means "small weakness that could bring him down." The orphans certainly looked weak, but inside, they were superhuman. I have my strengths and weaknesses, and you have yours, and another person you have not met yet has theirs, and so on, and so on.
Of course, the Fentons knew this all too well, and, even though they were not the types of people to look on the bright side, they knew that somehow, someday, they would find their way out of this maze of misfortune and break the series of unfortunate events that was their own lives.
That's it. Hope you enjoyed my story. Sorry if the ending's a tad cheesy, but the original ending was even worse and FAR too lame to use as a proper ending to the story that has been my life's focus since the Summer of 2005. Stay tuned for a sequel that's coming out this Fall/Winter, or maybe even next YEAR. All I can say is "Phew!" I'm finally done and I can move on to other fanfictions! Writing something this big REALLY takes it out of you! So, since I slaved away over a pencil and pad of paper, and, more recently, a keyboard and Wordpad, please be considerate and review this final chapter. See all you ASOUE fans later, and I'll be seeing you NBC fans in Halloween Town.
Until next time,
Sugary Snicket.