Chapter Thirteen
Foothills of the Ephel Dúath
As the night wore on, there were moments where those on opposing sides found themselves working closely together. Practicality and speed were their main concerns. Thus Darien lifted one end of a heavy piece of wood then looked up to see Gubbitch taking the other end. They exchanged almost imperceptible nods.
Manipulating the log so he could carry it behind him, Darien asked, over his shoulder, "You are the orc leader who offered himself in place of ... Sev?"
"Aye," was Gubbitch's only response.
No more was said until they reached their destination, lowered the log and turned to fetch another.
Darien looked down at the orc. This was, he realized, the first time he had stood this close to an orc without weapons between them and death a step away - and had he ever been so mad as to speak to one?
Frowning, he asked, "So you work here to rescue the woman, as well as the little uruk?"
"Aye. And tha works to rescue tha men."
"We would rescue anyone in these circumstances," Darien protested.
"So would we," Gubbitch stressed. "If none were in that cave besides tha men, we'd still be diggin'. If none were in that cave besides orcs, would tha be?"
Darien did not reply. They delivered a second log in silence, and walked back for the third. The tall man seemed deep in thought as he asked quietly, "Is there good, then, in all orcs?"
A loud cackle of laughter from Gubbitch brought Darien to a sudden stop. The orc leader controlled himself and replied, "Tha daft chuff. Don't go from one extreme to other. Orcs were bred to be evil, an' most of 'em do it reet well. But my lads are good uns, and they've fought plenty that weren't since war ended. Not all that looks pretty is fair, not all that looks foul is evil."
This time it was Darien who replied with a monosyllabic, "Aye." But his thoughts dwelt on the orc's words.
As they reached the third log, Darien stared Gubbitch directly in the eye. "Since the war ended, you say. And before that?"
"Afore that, our hearts and minds were not our own." Moonlight glimmered briefly in the orc's eyes. "More than can be said for men who chose to fight alongside us."
Darien nodded. The orc had a point.
xxxxxx
Later in the night
The smoke from the torches had gradually cleared and the temperature within the cave had dropped steadily as unseen fissures allowed small drafts of cold air to filter in. There had been a brief moment of boisterous joy when the silence was broken by the dull, measured clang of metal on stone beyond their prison of earth and rock. Whatever had transpired outside, now they knew that people labored for their release. Their own efforts had met little success, for the one section stable enough for excavation was found to be blocked by a boulder that resisted even the strength of the orc. Finally, the exhausted men had wrapped themselves against the cold to huddle in groups of two or three and seek what rest they could find. Nik had accepted a blanket from Horus and curled up alone against the wall.
After draping another blanket over Evan, who had slipped into a restless sleep, Sevilodorf returned to her seat beside Landis and pulled her cloak tightly about her shoulders. Her face was deeply etched by lines of weariness and the grey fog that had earlier clouded her mind hovered once again on the edges of her conscious thoughts. Scattered images and words flitted through her mind without order or reason. Erin's anxious face, Celebsul with that eyebrow of his climbing upward in gentle rebuke, Halbarad's voice urging the caution she had so neglected. And ever and again, Anardil's smoke grey eyes and wry smile.
As hot tears threatened to overflow, Sev was startled to hear Landis say gruffly, "Now, don't you give up hope."
Sev found Landis staring at her gravely. Wiping away the tears, Sevilodorf said in a tight voice, "You should rest."
Landis shook his head. "I'll be getting all the rest I need soon enough." Twisting his head, he looked over at Evan and asked, "How's the boy?"
"He should be fine," Sev replied. "It was a clean break and he's young."
"Aye." Landis' face tightened briefly as he attempted to push himself into a seated position. Sev reached over to lay a hand on his shoulder and gently push him back down. With a grimace, Landis lay back. Before Sev could remove her hand he reached up and clasped it tightly with a hand made warm by the fever that now coursed through his body. "I want to ask a favor of you, lady."
Sevilodorf nodded and said, "If it is within my power."
"Do you think you might be able to extend some of your forgiveness to the cap'n and the men?" Landis paused and swallowed heavily, then went on resolutely. "He's not a bad man, the cap'n. He never meant for you to get hurt. He's just doing his job as best as he is able."
Seeing Sev begin to shake her head, Landis squeezed her hand. "He's always looked after his people real well, and it just tore him up that he wasn't able to stop so many from dying The only way we could think to make it right was to try to cleanse the world of orcs so they could kill no more. We were mistaken this time, I know that now. I want to live long enough to explain that to the cap'n, but if not, let my death pay for all, please."
Sevilodorf felt her throat closing. How could she promise forgiveness; but then how could she refuse to grant a dying man's request? Darien and his men did no more than many others. She knew only too well the feelings of surviving the deaths of family and friends and wanting only to strike out at something in an attempt to make things right.
Slowly, she nodded and murmured faintly, "For my part, I will try."
"Good." Landis smiled and a tenseness left his body. With another squeeze, he released Sev's hand and motioned toward the water bottle sitting nearby. "I'd appreciate a drink of water."
After helping him to drink and tucking a blanket around his shoulders, Sev gave him an inquiring look as he once again cleared his throat.
"If you don't mind me asking, how did you come to be here? Rohan is a long way off."
Sev's eyes slid away from his. "There was nothing to keep me there."
Landis nodded and in a voice filled with understanding said, "We have much in common, lady."
Sev nodded without looking at the man. In a low voice as if speaking only to herself, she said, "A friend told me, 'The past never lets us go. It is part of us, the good and the bad.' I've been trying to focus on the good."
Lifting solemn eyes to meet Landis', she added, "Maybe we both should."
Landis held out his hand. "Agreed."
For the next hour they exchanged quiet words; fond remembrances of past events before the shadows of war had fallen upon their lives. In other circumstances, Sev thought as she listened to the dying man reminisce, they may well have become friends. But as the night passed, Landis' eyes closed and his words came less frequently, then he fell silent, his skin paling almost to white while tremors started to run though his body. Finally, Sevilodorf simply sat holding his hand.
From time-to-time men ventured to the back of the cave to see how Landis and Evan fared. Horus appeared on a regular basis, his piercing eyes seeking first Sev's silent opinion, then examining the ashen, shivering features of his commander. Horus was there again when Landis' deep breathing finally changed. Sev heard the series of rapid breaths followed by an agonizing silence. Then the quick breaths came again. It was a sound she had heard more times than she could bear to recall. She looked at Horus, as he knelt beside the stricken man.
His eyes glittered with more than reflected lantern-light as he acknowledged the inevitable. "He's going."
"Yes." What else was there to say? Let it be fast now, Sev wished, for Landis had lasted longer and suffered more than he should.
Three more sudden breaths followed again by silence. Then an unexpected, whispered word from the dying man, "Darien." He had clung onto life so long just to see his captain again, but it was not to be.
They awaited the next breath in vain. Instead, a trickle of dark blood leaked from the corner of Landis' mouth, announcing that he was no more.
Horus reached a strong hand made oddly tender and Sev watched numbly as brown fingers touched the dead man's forehead, then drifted down to brush the graying beard. Horus bowed his head and whatever words he whispered in his strange, liquid tongue escaped her understanding, but grief was its own language. Sev gently released Landis' hand and used a cloth to wipe his face. She had said all she had to say in the long hours of the night, so now she carefully arranged his hands upon his chest and stroked the hair from his face.
Climbing awkwardly to her feet, Sev gave Horus a brief pat on the shoulder before walking stiffly to stand near the rubble that barred the entrance. She wanted to reach out and claw at that mountain of mud and stone. To do something, anything, that would get her out of this place and away from the three still bodies. Grady, Landis, the unnamed man caught in the debris - she was surrounded by death again. Anardil had said, "Our part is to do our best with the present, until there is enough road between us and the past that its claws are dulled." But she feared there might never be road enough to dull the memories of this day.
How long she stood staring with unseeing eyes she did not know, but gradually Sev became aware of Nik sitting hunched behind her. His orcish features shadowed by the low light of the single lantern caused her insides to knot into an icy ball. A face out of nightmares she had hoped were laid to rest. Nightmares filled with death and the ache of loss. An image of Nik's fiercely determined face as he snapped Grady's neck overwhelmed her and she turned away from him. Were these men right, that there was no way orcs could ever be 'rehabilitated?' The rage and evil bred into them was so strong. Would not the world be better off without them?
Biting sharply on her lip to keep from screaming at the small uruk to get away from her, Sev took two steps closer to the mountain of debris blocking her escape.
"Be careful. That section keeps coming down."
The quietly spoken words pulled her to a halt. She whirled to face the uruk, her lungs filled with a harsh breath to shout at him to leave her be - but the look of sadness in his eyes caused the words to die upon her lips. Folding her arms tightly against her chest, she turned away again.
"The man is dead?" Nik's voice was hesitant, as his glance flicked towards Landis' body.
"Yes."
"He was a good fighter."
Sevilodorf shook her head as the meaning behind the words sank in. To Nik, calling someone a good fighter was high praise. What was more, in his voice she thought she heard a trace of regret.
Unable to look at the orc, Sev asked, "You are sorry he is dead?"
Nik moved restlessly then said, "I listened while you talked. He had reason to hate orcs."
"Yes." Sev hesitated. Turning to face the orc she said, "As do I."
"Me too." Nik shrugged his shoulders. "Most are as cruel to each other as they are to the enemy. The only other orcs I have met that know kindness are Gubbitch and his lads."
Sevilodorf studied the orc silently. Nik, despite his stature, might possess strength far beyond that of a man, but she knew only too well the brutality and strength of the hordes of Isengard. Not much taller than a hobbit, Nik would not have fared well in the company of the fierce Uruk-hai troops of Saruman.
"I was glad to get away," Nik added, with a grimace that made the dirty bandage around his forehead slip down.
Sev could see fresh blood trickling from one of the wounds on his head. He must have reopened the injury during the attempts to tunnel a way out of this blasted hole. All at once, she felt too weary to think.
Pulling her cloak tightly around her, Sev said, "Come, let me re-bandage your head, then I am going to lie down. I have neither the stamina of an orc nor the fortitude of an elf, and therefore must rest. It has been a very long day, what I remember of it."
Nik looked puzzled but followed Sev back to take a seat by the boy. Evan stirred enough to open bleary eyes, but settled back in his blanket at Sev's quiet word. Given all that he had seen this day, watching a human woman bandage a wounded orc was no longer a novelty. After suffering patiently through Sev's admonishments about keeping the wounds clean, the small uruk waited until she had wrapped herself into blanket and drifted off to sleep then stationed himself between her and the men.
xxxxxx
The five elves gathered together for a few moments to rest and share their thoughts. Celebsul could see that Aerio was still gripped with anxiety, guilt and anger.
"Calm your emotions, Aerio. They will drain you and we need all our strength."
"I cannot," came the reply. "There may be no one left in there alive. Sevilodorf ..."
"Don't fear the worst." Anbarad placed a hand on Aerio's arm. "Hope instead for the better."
Firnelin nodded agreement with his brother. "Why look twice for grief?"
Aerio scowled. "And my fury with these men. How can I dampen that until I see them meet justice? The King's own justice will probably not give them the fate they deserve."
"And what fate is that?" Celebsul asked his apprentice.
Aerio paused to think, and concluded that his statement had been perhaps a little excessive. "The leader, at least, should die for what he has wrought."
"Aye!" Gambesul stepped beside his friend Aerio to unite against their master's questioning. Sometimes Celebsul seemed too lenient in his dealings with mortals.
The grey eyes of the ancient elf regarded the two youngsters and a wry smile curved his lips. "So you judge this man wicked?"
"His deeds prove him so!" Aerio was adamant. "Do you judge him otherwise?"
"I do not judge him," Celebsul replied. "I do not yet know enough to do so."
Firnelin and Anbarad added their agreement to this. They had learnt well not to take things at face value, nor to confuse the nature of the deed with the doer. One of their other brothers had committed terrible acts when long ago he had fallen prey to the Shadow's evil, but he had not done so from free will, and he had been forgiven.
Gambesul was pondering hard on an idea that had suddenly occurred to him. He recalled that his master had the rare gift of being able, if he so chose, to see the thoughts of others. He decided to risk asking about it.
"If you want to know if the man is evil, why not look into his mind?"
Shaking his head, Celebsul responded, "I was wondering when someone would ask me that, and in what circumstances. Why not look into his mind? Because the mind of a man is a sacred and secret place, because he would know I looked and he would feel his innermost self invaded. I use the gift only when there is no other choice, and only when I am almost certain that it would be acceptable to the other person. Neither is true here."
"It matters not," Aerio rejoined. "A man should be judged by his deeds."
"So a kindly intended action that ends in harm should be punished?" Celebsul asked and continued, "A mistake that hurts someone should be avenged? A wrong act carried out due to ignorance should be met with retribution? Don't be so quick to rush to judgment, Aerio."
"Kidnap and theft are not due to misguided kindness, nor mistake, nor ignorance." Aerio retorted.
Celebsul cast a despairing look at Firnelin and Anbarad. They were older and wiser than his apprentices. The elven brothers returned sympathetic grimaces. This argument was going in circles. It was time to return to the digging, time to discover how dire the consequences of the men's deeds might be. Only then could the true weight of punishment or forgiveness be rightly judged.
xxxxxx
Pulled from the depths of a dream that left her heart racing by Evan's moaning, Sevilodorf reached out to find the boy caught in the grips of his own nightmare.
Brushing his sandy hair back from his forehead, she whispered, "Evan, wake up. It's only a dream."
Evan's eyes opened, and he looked around wildly. "Neal. Where's Neal? I've got to find Neal."
Continuing to stroke his head lightly, Sev said firmly, "Neal is fine, Evan. He'll be here soon."
"No, he's dead. I saw him." Evan groaned as his thrashing caused his splinted leg to thump painfully on the ground.
"It was only a dream, Evan."
Sev hoped that what she said would turn out to still be the truth. Horus had told the boy that he had seen Neal alive just before the landslide. Who knew what had gone on outside since that time?
"A dream?" Evan said. His eyes blinked slowly with confusion.
"Yes, only a dream," Sev repeated.
The boy's breathing slowed though he did not close his eyes. Maintaining her calming rhythm across his forehead, Sev glanced up to find both Nik and Horus watching her steadily from a short distance away. The dark man was not much larger than Nik and with the shadows playing across their faces and almost identical bandages around their heads, Sev was struck at how close in appearance they were at that moment.
Ah, that was the point, wasn't it? That Nik was a person too. She had forgotten for a time, allowed her mind to become clouded with anger and grief. So few of the orcs had been capable of overcoming the evil, which had for ages guided their thoughts and actions, that it was easy to believe none of them capable of being better. But some were, and Nik was one of them, as were Gubbitch and his group. And it was not simply that she could turn a profit from their trade that made her think so.
It was almost a year since she had first arrived at Burping Troll and during that time, the orcs had proven time and time again that they wanted to leave their vicious past behind them. In the tunnels of Angband, it had been Gubbitch and his boys who had protected them from the soldiers of the Mouth of Sauron. Even the wizard, Gandalf, had acknowledged Gubbitch's helpfulness in that situation. Gubbitch and Hooknose and Titch had risked themselves traveling south to insure that Celebsul's boat The Rowan was properly launched. A whole group of them had helped Russ build his lodge. And anytime extra help was needed for harvesting, hauling or building, one or two of Gubbitch's lads would show up.
Not that they were entirely "rehabilitated" by any stretch of the imagination. Sev had treated enough of the wounds they inflicted on each other while "playing" around to realize that there was as yet only a thin veneer of civilization covering their behaviors. She had once been witness to Rackler erupting in a rage of awesome fury over a simple game of chance. But then, she had known men who were almost as foul tempered and several who had killed with less provocation than Nik.
Sev's hand stopped abruptly with that thought. Nik had killed a man. And though Grady had without a doubt deserved to die, it did not change the fact that Nik was an orc, and Grady had been a man. The chill of the cave deepened as Sev raised her eyes to meet those of the little uruk. 'Oh, blessed Eru, what is going to happen to Nik?'
Evan twisted his head slightly to look up at her and said, "Healer?"
Sev gave the boy a thin smile and repeated briskly, "It was all a dream, Evan. Are you all right now?"
"Yes." The boy pulled his blankets more tightly around him. "But it's cold."
"I know. But we can't light a fire. Too much smoke," Sev replied with a calm she did not feel. "I'll see if I can find you another blanket. And I need to have a word with Horus. Will you be fine alone?"
Evan studied the shadows on the ceiling and sighed. "You don't have to sit with me like a baby."
Sev smiled at the boy's indignant tone. "Thank goodness. You keep that leg still, and I'll go find you another blanket."
After picking up her own blanket and spreading it over Evan, she walked over to where Horus and Nik sat.
"How is the boy?" asked Horus rising to meet her.
"Evan's fine. He had a nightmare."
Horus nodded. Evan's nightmares were a regular occurrence. Memories of the past often plagued the sleep of many in this band of men.
Sev frowned and eyed the man carefully. His dark features could have been carved of marble for all they told her of his thoughts. There was no use dilly-dallying over it; she had to know, so she might as well just ask.
In a voice made harsher by her inner turmoil than she meant it to be, she said, "I want to know what you are going to tell people about how Grady died."
Nik shrank in upon himself as he determined the reasoning behind Sev's question. He had killed a man. Never before had he killed a man. He had been considered too small and weak to be a warrior, so had spent the battles working in the caverns deep beneath Isengard. But he was stronger than a man, much stronger. And the man had needed to die. He had stabbed Landis, and was going to attack Sevilodorf next. But he was a man. Orcs who killed men were evil, and evil orcs were to be killed. Nik moaned. He did not want to die.
Horus looked from the dark haired woman who stood so defiantly before him, to the small orc who now quivered at his side. "What would you have me say?"
Sev chewed on her lower lip. "I will not ask you to lie. But I do not want Nik to face a punishment he does not deserve."
"Does not deserve?" Horus questioned. There was no guessing what thoughts lay behind his impassive face.
"Of course he doesn't." Sev concentrated on keeping her voice low. She did not know how the other men thought and would prefer to deal with Horus alone first.
Landis had said he wished for his death to pay for all. Would his men see that as meaning that Nik's actions were included?
"But a man is dead." Horus' voice was implacable.
"Two are dead," Sev paused, then said, "No, three and maybe more. But it is Grady's death that concerns me now. Nik should not be hurt because he did something that I was only moments away from doing myself."
A faint gleam appeared in his black eyes as Horus tilted his chin in agreement. "As madam, I also was willing to do."
"I know that. So what will you tell them outside when they ask?" Sev motioned to indicate the other men. "What will they say?"
"I ask again, 'what would you have me say?' For you two are the key to our freedom."
Without replying to Horus, Sev sighed and knelt before Nik. The small orc was a picture of abject misery. "Nik, do you understand? I can not lie for you, but I will do everything I can to keep any harm from happening to you."
Nik moaned again and covered his head with his hands. Sev patted the orc's arm in an attempt to provide a reassurance she was uncertain she felt.
Regaining her feet, she said, "We tell exactly what happened. Grady killed Landis and turned to attack the two of us. Nik jumped between, and Grady was killed. He would be dead anyway, it's just that Nik got there first."
Horus regarded the woman steadily. "That is what happened."
"Yes. The only fact that will cause any problem is that Nik is an orc." Sev stared into Horus' unreadable eyes. "Are you still of the belief that he should die for that reason alone?"
Horus' gaze flicked over Sev's shoulder toward the men along the opposite wall. None present had been particular friends with Grady. During the past hours, Horus had listened as they discussed his death and the murder of Landis. For murder, it had been. He had also watched them carefully while working with the orc… no, while working with Nik to clear a path out.
Horus shook his head. "No, he does not deserve death for killing Grady. Only one of the men might think differently."
Sev cast a quick look over her shoulder to the shadowy figures across the cavern. "Let me guess. The one who wouldn't let me tend to his arm?"
Horus gave a slight nod. "Osric is one who suffered greatly at the hands of Nik's kin."
Sev took note of Horus' use of Nik's name before answering harshly. "So did many of us. But Nik is NOT going to suffer for Grady's stupidity. I will not allow that to happen. Will you speak to this Osric or shall I?"
Horus' white teeth flashed in his dark face. "Madam, I think it would be best if I speak to all of them. Osric still believes you to be a witch."
"A witch?" Sev and Horus turned to find Nik looking at her with wide eyes. "Sev's not a witch. She's Rohirrim."
Sev gave a short laugh while Horus struggled to control a smile. Kneeling down, Sev said, "One and the same to people like Osric."
Nik frowned. "Well, they aren't the same."
"True," said Horus, the smile now in his voice. Sobering, he nodded to Sev. "I will speak to the men."
"If necessary, remind them of Nik's more powerful friends," Sev said gravely pointing toward the wall of debris blocking their exit. "I'm not certain I know how to reason with a bear."
With another slight nod and unreadable look at Nik, Horus crossed the cavern to begin a low voiced conversation with the five men who now remained.
"Teach won't let anything happen to me, will he?" Nik asked with a wavering voice.
Sev knew that 'Teach' was the title Nik used for Russ. "No, and neither will I. Neither will Celebsul."
Almost Sev added neither will the Rangers, but of that she could not be certain and would not give the little orc false comfort. The Ranger's duty was to maintain the King's peace and Sev was unsure of exactly how an orc who killed a man, no matter how much the man deserved to die, would be viewed by them.
On the other side of the cave, Horus' low voice was now intermingled with the voices of his men. Sev sighed. It would have been easier if she or Horus had killed Grady. No one would even think twice about it, for it would have been retribution of murder at the hands of another man.
Noticing Evan's attempts to twist about and see what the men were doing, Sev said, "Come with me, Nik. I can't leave Evan to roll around. He'll undo all my hard work."
Following the woman to the rear of the cave, Nik settled against the wall behind her. Now she stood as a shield between the men and himself as he had earlier stood guard for her. His mind occupied with his misery, Nik did not realize that Sevilodorf was speaking to him until she patted his knee.
"Nik, I want you to meet Evan."
Nik looked at the boy who now regarded him with wide-eyed alarm.
Pursing her lips and shaking a finger at Evan, Sev admonished, "Now, none of that, Evan. Nik won't hurt you."
"He's an orc," the boy said bluntly. "He killed a man."
"So have I." Sev's quiet words caused both orc and boy to look at her in astonishment. "Don't look so disbelieving. I could make a wager with you Evan that every man in this cave and outside digging for our release has killed other men. Would I win?"
Evan said sullenly, "But it's different."
"How?"
"It just is," the boy replied shortly.
His freckles stood out sharply in his pale face as he examined the woman before him more carefully. She didn't look as it she could kill anyone. As a matter of fact, she reminded him a lot of his Aunt Nirith. Short, plump and, just like Aunt Nirith had been, a little on the bossy side. But Aunt Nirith would never have put a bandage on an orc.
"Who did you kill?"
"A man who tried to kill me and my friends. I never knew his name." Sev did not bother to mention that there had in fact been more than one man's death she was responsible for; one was enough for Evan to understand, she hoped.
Evan said with relief, "Then that's alright."
"Isn't that what Nik did?" Sev knew she was pushing the boy toward an acceptance it had taken her months to reach, but she did not have the time to let him come to his own conclusions, nor did she have the patience of Celebsul to use in guiding the boy's thinking.
"But it's different. He likes to kill." Evan replied, with all the stubbornness of any person being convinced against their will.
Sev drew back and turned to the orc. "Did you, Nik? Did you enjoy killing Grady?"
"No," said Nik. Then he blurted out, "I never killed anyone before."
Now it was Sev's turn to stare in astonishment. "Never?"
"Not people. They wouldn't let me fight. They said I was too small and weak."
"Weak?" the word burst loose before she could stop it.
"For an uruk-hai. I am not very strong." Nik replied matter of factly.
"Strong enough," Sev muttered. She desperately wanted time to sort all this out, but knew that there was little time left. Facing Evan once again, she said, "Nik killed Grady for the same reason I have killed. To protect someone else."
Evan said, "But…"
"But what?" Sev felt the moments slipping by and a hint of exasperation crept into her voice. "Evan, the Rangers will ask you what happened to Grady. What will you tell them?"
Evan looked from the woman to the orc and back, then he turned his head and refused to speak. Sev's shoulders sagged. She had pushed him too hard. Nmad. She was no good at this. Reaching out to pat the boy, she felt him jerk away from her touch and dropped her hand.
"You think about it Evan. No one is asking you to lie, just to tell the truth."
Evan simply closed his eyes and hunched his shoulders. Sev sighed and moved back to sit beside Nik once more. Pulling her knees up to her chest, she leaned her head on them and thought, 'Will this night never end?'
xxx
TBC ...