I recently witnessed many students in my school…and by many I mean close to 100…chase someone. I won't get into details. But afterwards, I was talking to my friend about a chase I made up. She suggested I write a story about it.

Guess what I'm doing now. Go ahead, take a guess.

Marth was at a fancy restaurant, eating fancy food at a table outside. He was by himself, the way he liked it. The day was pleasant; warm, sunny, breezy, and…yeah. Nothing interesting happening. Just good fancy food, a nice tall glass of iced tea, and no craziness.

Until…it happened. Marth stood up because he had to go to the bathroom. He walked toward the door leading to the lobby of the restaurant. Though he thought nothing of it, he scraped someone's foot with his own.

"Hey! Hello, you stepped on my foot, bitch!"

Marth turned around in confusion.

"Excuse me?"

"My foot, jerk-off. You stepped on it."

"Really? Oh. Sorry." He continued walking to the bathroom. Then he got hit in the head with a slice of pie. He stopped walking. The guy that yelled at him chuckled. Angered, Marth picked up a nearby chicken wing and chucked it at his head. Unfortunately, that guy ducked and it hit the back of a woman's head.

"Oops." Marth tried to run to the bathroom, but he tripped. When his view changed from the floor to the customers, there was a massive food fight occurring. Tables had been overturned and waiters were being thrown. For some reason, there were explosions too. Marth took this opportunity to slowly crawl away, towards the short gate. He reached it with no trouble; no food hit him or his precious cape. He jumped over the gate and walked away, pretending he was minding his business. Then…it happened.

"There's the guy who started this! Get him!"

"Damn her…"

Everyone in the food fight jumped over the gate and started chasing Marth, who was running for his life. As the wave of people passed through the streets, more and more people joined in. Or got trampled. One or the other. Marth was only slightly quicker than these people, and only a few got pretty close to catching him.

Marth ran around a corner. The wave followed him.

Marth ran across a street. The wave followed him, stopping all cars.

"Oh, come on! I gotta find a hideout."

Marth found a hotel and ran inside. The wave broke through the two front doors. Marth unsheathed Falchion and ran toward a room door. He sliced it in half and went inside. There was a couple in the room, naked in the bed. The woman screamed as Marth jumped over the bed and out the window he tackled through. The wave of people still followed him, which now, for some reason, included the naked couple. They ran covered with a towel.

Marth spotted a playground. Maybe he could lose them there.

"Maybe I could lose them there."

I just said that. Anyway, Marth went in the playground, heading first for the swings. He picked up speed and jumped on the swing. That speed carried him up to a tree, which he jumped into. Now he could catch his breath as the angry mob surrounded the tree. He sighed when he regained it.

"I'll take care of this."

Marth, curious, looked down. The tree began to shake. For some reason, somebody had an axe and was attempting to chop the tree down. Marth had to think. He knew if the tree fell, it would fall right into the crowd, and he'd be done for. Why today, of all days? He looked around frantically. He spotted some power lines behind him. Yeah, power lines. That'd work.

"Yeah! Chop it down!" the mob roared. The tree fell. The empty tree fell, and the mob of 50-plus people was confused. They looked around. And then it happened.

"He's up on that pole! Get him!"

"Damn her!"

Marth slid down the wooden pole and continued running away. When he turned another corner, he spotted a bicycle. Victory. He jumped on it and sped away, running over its owner. Then the owner got run over by the angry mob, all of which mysteriously had bikes.

"You cannot be serious," he said, watching the mob and not where he was going. He crashed into a baby carriage, falling off of his bike. The mother of the shrieking baby screamed in horror. "Sorry miss!" Marth yelled, back on his bike and speeding away once more.

"What have you done to my-" Then she got run over. The baby disappeared.

Marth rode several blocks, then crossed another corner. The wave followed him, but the baby, who was also riding a bike (and didn't know how to turn) rode into the street and got hit by a truck. Marth winced. Then he stopped caring and headed for the train station. He went in, jumped off his bike, jumped over the turnstile, and got on the escalator. The mob did the same, trampling several people. As they endured the slow ride up, Marth turned around nervously.

The mob now contained 80-plus people. All of them were holding various weapons: slingshots, hammers, popguns, moles, red rubber balls, frying pans, pitchforks, green shells, etc. Marth looked up. The ride was almost done. He whimpered as the platform approached. As soon as his toe touched it, he took off and headed for the train. The angry mob, realizing they could just run up the moving stairs, followed him.

Marth ran into the first train car. The mob followed him as he ran in between cars. There were 15 of them. When he reached the back of the last car, he quickly jumped up to the roof, narrowly avoiding a pitchfork stab. Marth looked down.

"I hate suspended tracks."

He couldn't jump off even if he wanted to because the train was moving too fast. But this was a subway train, and it would have to go underground soon. Suddenly, an airplane flew overhead and dropped a bomb in front of the train. The entire front half was obliterated, and now, the train was plummeting into the street. Marth jumped onto the wooden side of the track, not looking behind him and covering his ears. The train landed with a thunderous thud, and several people below screamed. Marth unplugged his ears and turned around.

The mob was still there.

"He's still alive! Get him!"

"Shut up!"

Marth jumped off the track and onto the roof of a pizza shop. Where there was, for some reason, a motorcycle. He jumped on it, revved up, and drove into the street below. He began cruising. This motorcycle was pretty awesome. And blue. He would definitely take this back to the mansion. Wait, are they still behind him? He turned around.

Yep. All of them had motorcycles, too.

"This is f*cking ridiculous…"

Ooh, motorcycle scene. Next chapter. Sorry.