Kim Possible and Street Hawk: A Hazzardous Sitch p 7
Disclaimer: I do not own Kim Possible, Street Hawk or Dukes of Hazzard. Wish I did though.
Wally's Arrival and Enos' Attempted Inquest
In Hazzard, the plane carrying President Wally of Rodeghan is about to arrive in Hazzard. Old man Smithers had agreed to allow the plane to land in his field, as it is large enough to allow a jet to take off and land.
On the ground, Boss Hogg and Roscoe are sitting in their vehicles. Boss Hogg in his white Cadillac and Roscoe in a new Patrol car with Flash by his side. Roscoe had told Enos that Hazzard needs some more patrol cars and Enos agreed, a smirk on his face.
Earlier in the day, Roscoe told Boss Hogg that he must have touched the battery in the drowned unit and lost his mind temporarily. Boss Hogg had countered that Roscoe had already lost his mind, for keeps. Yet he said it with caring affection.
Boss Hogg is looking through his binoculars when he sees the plane, as is Roscoe. Roscoe, ever the screwball, looks over at Boss Hogg, his smirk in place.
"Don't even think about saying it, Roscoe. Please, don't." But Roscoe wouldn't have it.
"The plane, Boss, the plane! Gyuk-gyuk-gyuk!"
Boss Hogg could only roll his eyes exasperatedly and chuckle in amusement. For only Roscoe could make him laugh at times when he's nervous. However, this is not one of those times, yet very welcome as he was feeling somewhat nervous. The plane then makes it's final approach and touches down without a problem on the still-hardened soil.
Once the plane stops, the door opens and both cars go out to greet the new arrival. Yet the President is not quite what they had expected. Young, about nineteen years of age and with an air of superiority around him. President Wally takes a look around and scowls lightly when he sees nothing but farmland.
In a whiny voice, he declares, "I've never seen this place before. Is this Hazzard, Ben?"
"It is, Mr. President. It's not what I expected either. I was hoping for at least a paved runway, not one made of soil."
"Oh well. No matter. I'm just here to sign a trade agreement, correct?"
"Indeed you are, Mr. President. I'm Jefferson Davis Hogg, the County Commissioner. This is my right-hand-man, brother-in-law and the Sheriff of Hazzard County, Roscoe P. Coltrane."
"It's very nice to meet you, Mr. Hogg and Sheriff Coltrane. Just out of curiosity, what does the P stand for?"
Roscoe sighs exasperatedly as he replies, "Purvis, Mr. President."
President Wally nods in sympathy as he says, "Well, I've heard and seen stranger before, Sheriff. I'll just call you Sheriff Coltrane for here on out. Deal?"
"I can handle that, Mr. President. Welcome to Hazzard, gyuk-gyuk!"
Perplexed by the chuckle, President Wally goes on. "In any case, my Father is deeply interested in the trade agreement and the finest liquor your county has to offer. It's pretty much the only reason I'm here now. Even though I don't drink, I'm also quite fascinated."
Boss Hogg nods in agreement as he says, "Roscoe, prepare the escort for our dignified guest."
"You got it, Boss, gyuk-gyuk!" As Roscoe prepares the escort, consisting of one Patrol car at the moment, President Wally steps down from the plane and smiles when his feet hits solid soil.
"Oh, good. I thought I was going to step into a cow patty while I was here. These Oxfords are not meant for being worn on a farm, you know." He then asks, "Why only one Patrol car, Commissioner Hogg?"
"Well, two reasons. One, the Duke boys. The other reason is our Patrol cars have a tendency to either get smashed in or go swimming. The Duke boys are often the cause of it, of course. Heh-heh."
Curious, President Wally asks, "Who are the Duke boys? Are they royalty of some kind? I've never met American Dukes before." At Boss Hogg's puzzled glance, President Wally explains further.
"You see, I used to be a Prince in the Kingdom of Rodeghan. I was then introduced to Democracy by some friends of mine. It's a long and crazy story, Commissioner Hogg. But I'll tell you all about it on the way to your office."
"Very good, Mr. President. Your explanation helped a long way. So, who were your friends?"
"Kim Possible and Ron Stoppable. I have heard rumors they had gotten married and had children." He then goes on to tell Boss Hogg all about the prophecy about the reign of rule ending with Wally and how some Knights had taken that prophecy a little too seriously. By the time he gets done, they have arrived at the County Office.
Inside, Enos is typing information into the NCIC system to get a match on Bonnie Rockwaller. Finding none, he scratches his head and elects to check her regular records. As the computer searches, he hears the door open and bolts up, knowing they'll be having an important visitor here in Hazzard.
"President Wally, this is Deputy Enos Strate, Roscoe's best and straightest Deputy. Enos, this is President Wally from Rodeghan."
"Possums in a gum-bush, howdy, Mr. President."
Slightly amused, President Wally quirks his eyebrow and replies, "Howdy, Deputy. What are you doing there?"
"Oh, just checking out a visitor to Hazzard. Name of Bonnie Rockwaller. So far, I can't find a ding-danged thing."
President Wally's eyebrows twitch up at the name. "Bonnie Rockwaller. There's a name I haven't heard in a while. Where is she at right now?"
"Well, she was at the Duke Farm when I left this morning. When I left, she was pretty well out of it still. How do you know her?"
"I spent some time in Middleton. She was vicious, snobby and rude. How badly did she treat you?"
"It can't be the same one, then. Because this one was very nice. The only one she was nasty toward was Carl Johnson, yesterday."
"Oh? What did she do to him? Call him a loser in front of his friends?"
"Nope. She shot him in his privates, confirming what he had told me. For the most part at least." President Wally's face visibly pales after hearing that.
"Ouch. That would be nasty all right. How did it get to that point?"
"Apparently, she felt that he had hostile intent toward her and she shot him. Clear cut case of self-defense, Mr. President." President Wally nods at that before turning around to face Boss Hogg.
"Would it be possible for me to see Miss Rockwaller before I sign anything?"
"Yes, of course, Mr. President. We'll take my car and Roscoe with Enos as our escorts."
Wally's face brightens as he replies, "Very good, Commissioner Hogg. Shall we?"
Enos sighs before nodding and logging off of the system. When he's done, the group leaves the county office and heads for the Duke Farm. Roscoe takes the lead position in his cruiser and Enos brings up the rear as the vehicles leave the square. Unknown to them, a beat-up brown sedan is starting to follow them.
As they ride through Hazzard, President Wally smiles as he says, "For a community so small, it certainly seems lively, Commissioner Hogg." Boss Hogg can only nod and chuckle in agreement as he drives his Cadillac toward the Duke Farm.
As he drives, he sincerely hopes that the 'General Lee' is at the house as he is sure that President Wally would find it interesting.
In the brown sedan, the driver is thinking, 'This is my big chance to finally accomplish a goal. Even more, "they" will not get in my way. After all, no one has ever heard of this community. It's so backwater and rural, it's a wonder I even found it.'