Hold on 5
(Mariposa)
Author's Note: another part of my multi chaptered story entitled "Hold on". This chapter is titled 'Mariposa'; 'mariposa' here in the Philippines is a butterfly as big as two joined human palms.
Disclaimers: I don't own Card Captor Sakura and any of the characters on this story. Card Captor Sakura is owned of Clamp.
-----
"Paging Dr. Isumi you are needed at the ICU, Dr. Isumi to the ICU please…" said the nurse on the public-address system.
Nobody knows what happened to one of there patients but last night was the most terrible night for her. She moaned with pain, which was the loudest moan she ever omitted. It haunted everyone on level 6 of Tokyo Hospital.
While the hospital bed was being brought to the ICU, she saw nothing but flashing lights.
"Hold on…" she heard a very familiar voice that she really loved hearing.
She needs blood transfusion, they never knew that this will come to the extent of sending her to the I.C.U and be confined for weeks.
She can't feel anything; she was so tired that she drifted off to a long comatose.
-----
Tomoyo's mother didn't know what happened she just came from Osaka for their monthly business report and had only Syaoran and Sakura to look for her daughter. Eriol was unable to make it to the hospital since he flew back to England and will be back for a couple of days.
She went out of Tomoyo's room with the white robe which was assigned for the visitors of the ICU patients and a face mask.
She can't hide what she saw. She was so sad that Tomoyo experienced this much pain which she doesn't deserve at all.
"How is she?" Syaoran asked her.
"Fine… I guess" her voice expressed sadness.
"I want to take a look at her…" Syaoran wore the white robe then the face mask.
-----
"I know you can hear me…" Syaoran begun.
There was no response but the sound of those machines on Tomoyo. Before the only thing installed on her was a dextrose, but now there were artificial respirators and an electrocardiograph which created the beeping sound.
She just laid there unmoving. Her glowing skin changed into a pale flesh skin and her before slim built was now skinny. It was now very evident that she is suffering from a very fatal sickness.
Syaoran sat on a chair situated beside the bed. He stared at her for awhile then gently held her left hand.
He felt the urge to shed tears but stopped it because Tomoyo never liked to see someone crying for her. He just closed his eyes then composed himself for a couple of seconds.
"I'm sorry…" he said in a deep soft voice.
Syaoran lifted the hand he was holding then gently placed his lips on it as if giving it a kiss.
Of course, Tomoyo made no response. Syaoran didn't wait for her to move or speak, but he wanted this time to be his time to tell her what he wanted to tell her not so long ago.
"…I know I failed to make you happy…" he admitted it, well on the first place he never voiced out the feelings he has for her.
"I never told you how much I love you, and I really regret that every moment that I never showed you what I really felt for you…" he bit his lower lip. He really felt so guilty. Oh, how he wished that he could have the power to turn back time and to grab the opportunity to show his affection.
"I know that I have let all those chances to pass but I was really coward to tell you. I am so sorry when kept I you waiting on one of our dates and let you just stand on that place under a heavy rain…" a teardrop rolled on his cheeks.
"… I remember one night, when we weren't still together you came crying to me telling that your ex-lover left you… I hope I came to him and killed him…"
"I really wondered you have many suitors and you chose me. I'm one of those lucky people who have someone to love them and yet I just ignore your love. I don't deserve it anyway. But you shared every dream you want to have and want it to happen with me…"
Syaoran felt the hand give a light squeeze. Then Tomoyo's eyes fluttered open. Her eyes articulated exhaustion and pain.
Syaoran felt overjoyed.
"Are you alright?" he asked as he hid the tears he shed by wiping it.
Tomoyo tried to muster a smile and enough energy to raise her voice, but still her words came as a whisper.
"Better than ever…"
Syaoran knew that she was lying. How could you expect someone almost knocking at death's door be fine?
"Please don't speak…" he said but Tomoyo managed to give him the 'see I'm fine' look.
Tomoyo whimpered a little when she felt her whole body throbbing. Syaoran couldn't take the sound of Tomoyo's cries and so he gripped the girl's hand.
Syaoran was now torn into telling Tomoyo to survive or let go. But if her surviving means that she'll still grieve and experience pain then why not let go and lessen the pain that she is feeling.
"Tomoyo…" Syaoran was so unsure but before telling her his opinion he took some time to tell her something unusual. Unusual in the sense that he never told her this words in front of her breathing body.
"Yes…" her voice pure of love pierced through his heart.
"I love you…" Syaoran said. "Unusual ne?" he asked.
"I forgive you…" she responded. All the while that Syaoran was talking she heard his every sincere words. It is true that the boy never speaks those words but now that he did, it was all true.
"I'm really sorry…" he sobbed. " I want to thank you with all those good times you shared with me and I'll treasure those. For all those impossible dreams that you told me would be possible with my help…" he sobbed again.
"Does that mean goodbye…" Tomoyo said with her soft eyes on him.
"I know you can't anymore hold into your sickness. If freeing you means your happiness and satisfaction, then why not. And please do remember that I never did this because I hate you, but because really love you."
Syaoran stood up still holding her hand. "I can't bear to see you face the torment of trying to survive, even if it is for me. The pain you put yourself through is too much. I want two things in my life Tomoyo, first one of lesser importance is you, but the most important thing is your happiness…" Syaoran embraced Tomoyo tightly; his last words for her stabbed him on his chest. "Even if it means losing you forever."
Tomoyo unexpectedly hugged back but now a little tighter. She cast tears on Syaoran's embrace then kissed him softly on his tousled hair.
"Is that what you really want me to do, Syaoran?" She asked gently.
"Yes, be free Tomoyo gently spread your wings and enjoy the beauty of heaven and the scent of freedom…" he gripped tighter again.
Syaoran smiled lovingly at Tomoyo as he gently laid her on her bed. He again gripped her hand. Tomoyo gripped back.
"Aishtemasu… Syaoran…. Sa.Yo.Na.Ra." came the soft reply as Tomoyo gazed deep into the eyes and the face of the one she loved, closed her eyes, loosened Syaoran's hand and smiled as she left forever.
beeeeeeeeep!
owari
A/N: This isn't the last part of the story. Please be guided that the next part of this story pertains to the lives of the characters after the death of Tomoyo.
R&R