Title: Heaven's High
Author: Etsuki-chan
Summary: Sarah is killing herself slowly after her return home. Will Jareth be able to save her? Is his love enough to fill her shattered soul?
Pairings: Um…Jareth/Sarah
Warning: This is a pretty dark fic. I don't really know why I wrote it. Just in a dark mood. Anyway, rated M for drug abuse and just in case I decide to make it into an actual story.
Disclaimer: I do not own Labyrinth or, for that matter, David Bowie's super fantastic song Ashes to Ashes. Though, obviously, I am a fan of all three. (That is to say Labyrinth, David Bowie, and Ashes to Ashes…)
She hated herself, for everything she had ever done to hurt him. One more time, she would sit and she would breathe in the toxin. She would die… waiting for him to return.
Do you remember a guy that's been
In such an early song?
I've heard a rumor from ground control
Oh no, don't say it's true.
"Jareth," Another un-answered call. Another silent plea. God why was she doing this to herself? Why was she killing the heart that had broken his?
"Jareth," she begged to the night, "I wish you happiness Jareth…a happiness I could never give you. My love…forgive me." Another pill. Another poisonous memory that floated by in her dreams.
They got a message from the action man,
"I'm happy hope you're happy too.
I've loved all I've needed to love.
Sordid details following."
"Sarah, you silly girl," Jareth whispered into the shadowed room. His Sarah lay silently upon the floor whimpering in her sleep.
"My Sarah, I could never find happiness with you in such pain," gently he swept the girl into his arms and placed her upon the bed. "My dear girl, why? Why would you break me, then kill yourself. Is it truly worth this misery, my love? Is my pain worth your death?"
"Jareth," she whispered her eyes opening to stare into his own, "It doesn't matter anymore. Nothing makes sense. This silence…this loneliness…I can't fight it anymore. I miss you. I have nothing to hold onto. Nothing to pray for. I have…nothing."
The shrieking of nothing is killing
Just pictures of Jap girls in synthesis and I
Ain't got no money and I ain't got no hair
But I'm hoping to kick but the planet it's glowing
"Stop this nonsense, Sarah," Jareth said disapprovingly standing above her. "It is not you who has the right to die. You are the one who hurt me, love. I am the one who should need consoling."
"But…" Sarah began, "I…I didn't mean…I'm useless, Jareth. I know I'm not worth anything. I've never been."
"And who told you that?" Jareth demanded.
"My father…and my step-mother," Sarah began hesitantly, "and…well it's true, isn't it? I mean I proved it, didn't I? By hurting you I just proved their point. I'm not worth it. All I'll ever do is hurt people."
"Please stop feeling sorry for yourself, Sarah," Jareth said on a sigh, "We all know you have your issues to deal with. Congratulations, but here's news for you. Everyone does. Everybody has been there before. We all know that it's wrong, but what does it matter at the time? We just want out. And we find our own ways. Different, yes, but in the end…they all lead to the exact same place."
Ashes to ashes, funk to funky
We know major Tom's a junkie
Strung out on heaven's high
Hitting an all time low
"I suppose," she whispered, staring down into her lap, "but…but I do try, Jareth. Every time…I try a little bit harder. At least that's what I tell myself. I say, 'no more, Sarah. You're worth more then this.' But it never holds true. I always give in…when I remember your face."
"Oh, no you don't," Jareth said angrily, "Don't go putting this off on me. This is your own fault. You've had these issues buried inside of you long before I came along."
"Yes," she said softly, "You're right. I just…it gets worse whenever I hurt someone. It gets…un-bearable. So I try and drown it out. It only works for a while, and when it's over, all I ever end up doing is killing myself. Slowly."
Time and again I tell myself
I'll stay clean tonight
But the little green wheels are following me
Oh no, not again.
I'm stuck with a valuable friend
"I'm happy hope you're happy too"
One flash of light but no smoking pistol
"And is it worth it?" Jareth asked looking her in the eyes, "You do this to yourself time after time…and you drive yourself further and further away from me. Sarah…no matter what you've done I love you. I'll always love you. So…I don't understand why you're doing this!"
Because I've done nothing Jareth!" She shouted jumping to her feet in anger, "I've never done anything to deserve your love! I am nothing! Don't you see? I want it to be over. I want to be able to be happy. But every time I try…I don't know! I just can't get through. There's like…a barrier that stops me."
"Then break it," Jareth whispered into the silence.
"What?" She demanded.
"Break the barrier then, Sarah," slowly he rose and approached her, "I'm waiting right here for you, love. Break the barrier and then you'll be happy. Just get rid of what stands in your way." He pointed to the bag of 'toxins' on her nightstand.
I never done good things
I never done bad things
I never did anything out of the blue,
Want an axe to break the ice
Wanna come down right now
"I…" she began, "I don't know if it's really that easy, Jareth." Jareth cocked his head slightly and raised an eyebrow.
"Okay then," he made for the window.
"Wait!" Sarah grabbed the bag and held it out, "Take it."
"What?" He asked startled.
"Take it, and throw it out. I don't want it anymore," she continued to motion for him to take the bag.
"No," he stated flatly.
"No?" Sarah asked in shock, "But you…you just told me to…I thought you want me to…"
"Exactly, Sarah," Jareth said very softly reaching up to stroke the side of her face softly with one leather incased finger, "I said I wanted you to get rid of it. I'll be right here. Throw it away Sarah. Get rid of the barrier."
"It'll hurt, won't it?" She whispered.
"Yes," he answered honestly, "but it'll help in the end. Choose Sarah. The drugs…or me?"
"Jareth," she breathed as he looked down upon her with hopeful eyes. "I…I've never been without them."
His eyes darkened and once again he made for the door.
"Wait!" Once again she grabbed the bag and moved to the window. Taking a deep breath she opened the bag and watched as he beautiful poison blew away in the breeze.
"That's my girl, " Jareth whispered in her ear. Smiling she turned in his arms and pressed her lips against his.
"Please Jareth," she begged as he began trailing kissed down her throat, "I've waited so long…"
"Yes my love," he whispered as he swept her once again into his arms and towards the bed, "Now Sarah…let us find that happiness."
Hours later Sarah lay in the darkness listening to the sound of her Goblin King breathing in his sleep. Rising she walked slowly to her desk and slid open the top compartment. Sighing heavily she lifted out a small plastic bag. Glancing towards her sleeping lover she smiled as the tears began to fall.
"Forgive me, my love," she whispered as she exited the room.
Ashes to ashes, funk to funky
We know Major Tom's a junkie
Strung out on heaven's high
Hitting an all time low
In the silence that followed Sarah's confession two mismatched eyes stared darkly at the ceiling above.
"You've made you choice, Sarah. Live with it, my love, for I…cannot." With that the figure vanished and the girl that returned was left to kill herself in both silence and loneliness. Her savior…had gone. And it was all her fault.
My mother said to get things done
You'd better not mess with Major Tom…
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Okay, that was a super dark one, wasn't it? Do you think I should make this into a story, or just leave it as a one shot? Hmm…I don't know. Review and let me know. Thanks!