AN: I find myself thinking more about Logan's side in this story - how he thinks, what he's doing and feeling. Not sure why, but I'll try to focus more on Rory too, though mostly I feel now we've seen her life more through the stories she's told. Today we'll stick to Logan, however.
October 5th, 2022
On Wednesday afternoon Logan was at the sidelines of Em's soccer game once again, and he was beginning to sense what Rory had said when he'd asked about whether they kept the outside practice up also in October and had gotten an answer containing the phrase 'rain or shine'. It wasn't pouring or anything, but there was definitely a drizzle - which actually kind of reminded him of London.
The misty rain that covered his raincoat gave him glances into his past - not just Odette - there were plenty of London experiences that went beyond her. He'd moved to London on his own, twice, after all. There were memories of late night walks home after hitting the pub with the guys, a few early morning walk-of-shames for him too, barely recalling the names of the women. Not something he was proud of. Beyond the reckless - if it could be considered that - there were also a lot of memories of exploring London with more inncent type of youthful curiosity - each antique bookstore, old movie theater, theaters and cabarets, off-the-beaten-path restaurants - making him feel alive, even in the rain. That was what every time Rory had been to London to see him had been like, both back when she'd still been in college and later. Being together back then, regardless of the label they used - or didn't, had been like a time machine.
Em, who was running around, her head in the game, didn't seem too bothered by the rain though. And Logan really didn't know whom the girl had inherited that trait from, neither him or Rory had ever been particularly outdoorsy even if he had done a few more outdoorsy sports than Rory.
The whistle noted the end of the practice and the kids all made their way towards the bleachers. Em's nanny was there too, but today Logan hadn't talked much to her, being more in his own bubble.
"You looked good out there," Logan commented casually.
"Thank," Em replied.
"I was hoping to take you out for ice cream, or I don't know - hot chocolate or something… tonight but after weather like this… it doesn't quite seem like the best idea with your clothes being all wet," Logan said, feeling relieved he'd brought a decent rain jacket which had kept him dry.
"I'm going to change, silly," Em chortled.
"They have changing rooms back there and everything," Catalina, the nanny replied, who was in charge of picking Em up after school and taking her to soccer practice on most Wednesdays. Technically Logan figured he could've done it, but he got the gist - the nanny was also particular about not losing her work hours and he certainly didn't want to get on her bad side, realizing that he too might in the future be requiring her services.
"Oh, good. So maybe burgers? Hot chocolate?" Logan suggested hopefully, having already cleared things with Rory.
Cataline nodded, smilingly, at the girl, having been kept in the loop about the liberties Logan had with the girl.
"I'm starving," Em exclaimed and hopped over towards the changing rooms with the bag Catalina handed her.
Logan struggled to hide his smile, and that made Catalina smile at him in return. While the woman had never been let in on the whole background of what had happened and why he was there now and not before - the woman at the very least seemed to approve of the current developments.
Strangely enough the sky began to clear as Em finally made it out of the changing room, and Catalina made sure the girl was fine and then handed over her backpack and gym bag over to Logan. It was sort of symbolic even, handing the girl over to him. Just Logan and Em, alone, for the first time.
It almost seemed like child's play now - what could possibly go wrong?
Yet, five minutes later Logan found himself laughing at himself as he struggled adjusting Em's car seat to the right height, not wanting to take any chances.
"I'm hungry, can we go yet?" Em whined, not appreciating his perfectionism.
"Just a minute," Logan said and exhaled from relief as he announced - "There..," as he finally got it adjusted to his liking.
As he'd thought about the plan earlier concerning where to take Em to, he'd struggled, being a little unsure if a restaurant with a pub setting in the evening was really appropriate for a little girl. But eventually he'd found a slightly classier diner that offered a variety of things he believed might be to a child's liking. Still, he was strangely nervous.
"So what do you feel like eating?" Logan asked.
"I thought you said burgers," Em said.
"I did, but you can have something else if you want," Logan suggested, and opened the door of the diner to Em, who was now dressed in a casual pair of jeans and a wool-fleece sweater.
"ANYTHING I want?" Em asked and the way she did, certainly made him a little cautious.
"Um…," Logan hesitated, but honestly he struggled to think of anything too outrageous. He'd seen Rory eat pounds and pounds of junk food in one sitting, and surely Em had been subjected to that at least a few times in her life - despite healthy eating being honored a lot more in that household these days. "As long as it's not wasteful and you promise to eat something nutritious too, I guess so," Logan replied.
"And I can pick it myself?" Em asked.
"Sure," Logan agreed, loving the fact that this seemed to be something important to her. Maybe Rory didn't ask her opinion often enough? But that didn't really sound like Rory, but either way he was enjoying the moment and humouring the girl.
What he hadn't realized was that this meant reading her the whole menu - and that meant the WHOLE menu - not just the kid's section and the desserts. Logan, however, didn't mind one bit, enjoying every second with her.
Logan settled for a simple turkey burger and a salad, and Em had gotten herself some chicken pasta, a jumbo sized hot chocolate with marshmallows and a huge chocolate chip cookie. Sure, a carb-bomb, but the girl had just spent an hour running around in the rain. Surely, there were worse meals.
"So, how was school today?" Logan asked, after they'd made their order. Thinking up subjects to talk about, beyond observations and things about whatever they were doing, was still not the most natural thing for him.
"I don't wanna talk about it," Em mumbled, hiding behind the gigantic hot chocolate cup in front of her.
Logan wasn't sure if this was something to worry about or she just didn't feel like going over it. Either way, it made him a little cautious.
"Nothing bad happened, right?" Logan asked.
"No," Em replied.
"You know I ran past your school this morning, it looks like a cool school," Logan pointed out, having begun reinventing himself by finding the best jogging routes for starters - but so far he wasn't a fan. The Boston Common didn't quite measure up to Hyde Park and not all of the coast was as accessible as he'd hoped. But there were still trails to try out and he'd joined a few groups on Facebook to try to see what people recommended. Naturally, on social media he never went by his full name.
"Why were you running? Was someone chasing you?" Em asked, causing Logan to chuckle.
"No, no one was chasing me," Logan laughed. Clearly jogging wasn't a fashionable work out in the Gilmore-Hayden household. "I do it for sport, like you have your soccer…," he explained.
"Yeah, but I am running to take the ball away from the other team," Em found more logic in her sport.
"Well… I've always thought it's better than running on a treadmill at least," Logan replied.
"What's a treadmill?" Em asked. Apparently Logan's statement had gone a bit over her head.
"It's when people work out at home. It's like a machine, where you run in place?" Logan tried to explain it simply.
"Oh, like in a gym, right?" Em inquired further.
"Yeah, like that," Logan replied.
"Sounds boring," Em announced nonchalantly. "Running, that is," she elaborated.
Logan chuckled lightly.
"Kind of," Logan said, not bothering to explain how people sometimes made it interesting by listening to music or podcasts while they ran.
"Do you do any other sport?" Em inquired.
"I swim sometimes, haven't in a while…," Logan admitted. "I've tried a bunch of different things," he decided to add but hold off on going into the details of his love for extreme sports. He wouldn't want the girl getting any ideas about jumping off of high places or things like that.
Their food was brought to the table and the two dug into their meals, eating for a bit in silence.
"What do you do all day?" Em asked all of a sudden, her mouth full of pasta.
"Well.. I work a little. But I work from home, so that's mostly pretty boring. Meetings or writing something," Logan shared. Between his run this morning and working he'd organized a moving company to pack up about half of his belongings at his London house, mostly winter gear and essentials for now, deciding to leave Odette's things just waiting there, unsure what to really do with them.
This week had been a little slower because Rory had a busy week at work, so they'd postponed their lunches - in part Rory's way of assuring him she wasn't in a hurry. But that was fine - he was not only living for the stories now, he was making his own with Em.
"That's it?" Em raised her eyebrows expressively.
"No…," Logan mused. "I like to read books, sometimes watch a movie or just go take a walk. I don't know a lot of people here yet, so it's been pretty boring really," he added. Mostly what he'd done here was shop this and that for his apartment, and try to locate places he liked for dinner or lunch, not really feeling like cooking for just himself in the evenings. But eating alone really wasn't much more fun either, but recently he'd found a pub close to his apartment where the bartender at least offered a half-decent conversation with his meal.
"Where did you live before?" Em then asked, causing Logan to stop breathing for a second. Was this it? "Mommy said that house was your new place," she added.
"I lived all the way in London. Do you know where that is?" Logan said along with a mild sigh, seeing no sense in lying to her.
"That's where the Queen lives," Em said.
Logan found the connection rather odd, but could easily imagine Rory telling the girl about the Royal family - the little girl liked castles and princesses, right? Logan didn't have the heart to tell the girl that it was past tense - 'live' now, and he simply nodded, adding, "It is."
"It's far, right?" Em inquired.
"Yeah, it's almost as far as where Gigi's mom lives," Logan tried to bring in an analogy. Logan was so sure, the question - THE question - was so close now. But the question never came, as Em got extremely excited about her cookie that was served with a scoop of vanilla.
Seeing the girl happy, even if it was for something as trivial as a cookie and ice cream, made his day, and he breathed heavily, for having dodged the question he wasn't yet quite ready to answer.
They soon finished their meal, with some light banter, feeling more and more relaxed around each-other. Logan drove the girl to her home, with the sun already set.
"Hey - did you have fun?" Rory asked, sliding her hand over Em's head casually in greeting, as she stood there on the doorway in her leggings a wrap sweater around her. It was this image that surprised Logan with its bitter-sweetness, however. This was what it could've been - him not just dropping the child off but going home to them - both of them. This was what he'd time and time again dreamt of, an idea he'd suggested and toyed with, but Rory had never been ready for. It still hurt that he hadn't been enough. But he was now smarter, knowing that it was not a direct measure of his adequacy. She hadn't been well, and under the circumstances it had been the right thing. So what if he now desparately wished things would've been different.
"Yeah, it was great," Em replied, wiping away a decent chunk of Logan's lingering pain and replaced it with a deep warmth within him. She was almost about to slip in through the door, but stayed with her mother for a bit.
"Yeah, it was really fun - I hope we do it again soon," Logan said, and then experienced something he hadn't quite expected.
The little girl rushed down a step and hugged him, essentially his legs, but didn't seem too bothered by it. The motion was quick and with a quick wave she hopped off inside, adding a casual "Bye".
Rory didn't say anything at that - but smiled, clearly knowing how much this meant to him.
"See you Saturday, I guess?" Logan said.
"Uh-uh, bye" Rory replied, slipping inside with a brief glance in goodbye.
AN: not terribly aciton packed... but I think step by step - needed. If you have any ideas (I have a few already but more beyond going to have dinner at a pub to speak to the bartender) how Logan would make himself more home in Boston, reinvent himself, I appreciate suggestions.