AN: I've finally decided to set a schedule for this fic! I'll be updating every Tuesday and if I'm far enough ahead I'll post another chapter on Saturdays when I can. I hope you like the chapter!
"What's this?" I ask as I look down at what just came out of the scroll.
"Don't talk with your mouth open, mija." I roll my eyes at Ichika's scolding and turn my focus from my food to the new scroll in front of me. I finally decided to move onto the next things in the scroll mom left, but this scroll is different. It's a white scroll with red flames. I hold up the scroll so Ichika can see it from her spot on the floor beside me.
"This doesn't look like an Uzu scroll."
"No, it looks like a Konoha one," Ichika says as she looks at it closely. "Maybe your father's?"
"Dad's?" I almost drop the scroll. Ichika snorts and lays her head back down. And she calls me lazy. I move my food to the side, as well as the larger storage scroll. I unroll the scroll with flames to find it to be another storage scroll. I put my hand over the seal in the center and a piece of parchment comes out immediately.
"I'm getting déjà vu," I say as I look down at the old parchment. Ichika snores. I snort and turn back to the paper.
Hey Tadpoles,
I immediately feel my throat tighten. I rub my hands over my thighs quickly trying to ground myself. A technique that Ren suggested the last time I had a panic attack. I take a deep breath before continuing to read.
Don't tell your mom I called you that, she'd kill me for it.
I smile at the line. Dad sounds exactly like Shikaku whenever he does something that could make Yoshino mad.
I'm sorry if you're reading this, it means that I am no longer with you. I wanted to teach the things included in this scroll to both of you when you were old enough. I read your mother's letter first, I did not know how or what to include in my own. Despite my status of being the Hokage, I have to tell you this: follow what your mother instructed you to do if you feel unsafe in Konohagakure.
If you cannot stay in Konoha, I suggest going to Kumogakure. Despite what the elders say about the Raikage, he will provide protection for you if you need it. He's a strong leader, and is loved by his village. From our fights it was easy to see that he is also the brother of Killer Bee, the jinchūriki of Gyuki. He will treat you both with respect. We suspect that the jinchūriki of the two tails also resides in Kumogakure.
They will be able to teach you how to work with the nine tails. I'm sorry that your mother or I may have had to put the responsibility of being a jinchūriki onto you. But it is my belief that you are both heroes. You both will become the future of Konohagakure, should you decide to stay here.
I know you will change it for the better.
The will of fire is what has kept me fighting for so long. To me, the king is the future generation of the village. It has been my duty since I realized this, to save as much information as I can to pass my will of fire onto you. Included in this scroll are various techniques I've learned from barrier seals to chakra sensing. I've also included some of my kunai with my Hiraishin formula on them. There are also notes on some of the jutsus I use with the toads, and my notes on the tailed beast ball and eventual creation of the Rasengan. If Jiraiya-sensei is in the village, bug him about it. If you need to find him, he'll probably be at the bath houses.
I can't help but laugh at that. Jiraiya will never change.
If you need assistance with learning Hiraishin, you can ask Genma Shiranui, Iwashi Tatami, and Raidō Namiashi. They were a part of my protection squad and I taught them how to use the Flying Thunder Formation Technique.
In addition to all of this, I've included in this seal the keys to enter any of my safe houses in the village and outside of it, as well as a map to get to them. In my safehouses I keep extra kunai, clothing, robes, and texts that may help you in your studies. I also keep a copy of your mom's cookbook in each of them as well. Her cooking is the best.
I trust both of you, Naruto and Kikuko, with carrying my will of fire to the next generation. I am so proud of you both.
With all my love,
Dad
I take a shaky breath as I put the letter back on the table. I reach back over for my plate of food and pick up a taco. I take my time eating, digesting what I'd just read. I play with my beans and rice a little before Ichika opens an eye to give me a look. I quickly finish my food before pushing my empty plate away.
I grab the scroll once again and place my hand over the seal in the center. This time a weapons pouch comes to the surface. Instead of being a regular weapons pouch, this one is bright yellow and is covered in narutomaki. I put that pouch to the side, assuming it's for Naruto. I put my hand over the seal again and this time a new weapons pouch comes out.
This one is an off white color and is covered in chrysanthemums.
Specifically white chrysanthemums.
One of the few topics I really paid attention to during the kunoichi classes was the flower classes. Ino and I never really got along, but she really liked flowers so I tried to learn more about their meanings, too. Ino freaked out when she realized I didn't know that my name means chrysanthemums, so I learned all of the meanings behind a chrysanthemum.
Normal chrysanthemums symbolize friendship, longevity, royalty, and rejuvenation.
White chrysanthemums symbolize death, grief, and truth.
Why was Naruto's weapons pouch nice and colorful? Why was my weapons pouch a literal symbol of death? I hear shuffling and look over to see Ichika getting up from her spot on the floor. She looks over at the pouch before looking up at me.
"Why aren't you opening it?"
"I don't know, maybe because it literally means death?" I ask. Ichika sighs as she leans over and rests her head on my shoulder.
"I forget that you're so used to Konoha's perception of Uzushiogakure and the Uzumaki clan."
"What do you mean?" I ask as I fiddle with the weapons pouch in my hands. It's heavy. A lot heavier than what I used to carry back in Konoha.
"While other villages associate the Uzumaki with their strong life forces, they forget where that comes from. They also don't know anything about the intricacies of your clan's associations with death."
"Huh?" Ichika huffs out a small laugh before bumping her head against mine.
"Your clan has a strong connection to the Shinigami," Ichika says.
"Like how dad used those seals to seal Kurama?"
"Exactly," she says. "While those outside of the Uzumaki clan can summon the Shinigami, those within the clan tended to use a different seal and mask to summon Izanami, the goddess of both creation and death."
"Of course Konoha wouldn't summon her 'ttbane," I mutter under my breath. Ichika laughs loudly, hurting my ear.
"That is why Uzushiogakure has so many rituals regarding life and death, and the importance of both of those things," the mountain lion says.
"It makes sense now."
"If you wear a mask like in the Uzumaki mask storage temple in Konoha, you can release souls from the Shinigami's stomach," Ichika says lightly. I shake my head at the abrupt change. I should be used to this with Ichika now. She likes changing things quickly to mess with others. Especially me.
"Why did they build a temple in Konoha?"
"Men," Ichika says as if it's the most obvious answer in the world. "Konoha did not recognize the matrilineal nature of the Uzumaki clan until after Uzushiogakure fell."
"Of course," I sigh. It is the most obvious answer in the world, especially when it comes to Konoha.
"Ashina Uzumaki was the clan head whilst in Konoha. Mito could make suggestions, but it was up to Ashina to make the final decisions."
"But wouldn't he face repercussions at home if he didn't follow her suggestions?"
"That's why he lived in Konohagakure," Ichika says. "He said that he wanted to have the storage building there in case of emergencies, so that there would be at least a few masks for the Uzumaki in the village."
"There's seals to protect it, right?" I ask. Ichika just glances over at me briefly and I feel a pit form in my stomach. "Right. That would make too much sense."
"The masks were never used in the end," Ichika says. "Well, at least as far as we know. Their spots in the storage temple here are still white. Should they turn green, that means the mask has been used."
"I'm going to have to put up a barrier seal as soon as I get back," I say as I rub my forehead. I can feel a headache coming on. Just the thought of Danzo being able to use one of those masks makes my blood run cold.
"That would be wise," Ichika says. "Now what was in the letter?"
"Dad talked about his will of fire," I say quietly. "And he talked about who to go to in order to learn certain techniques he used. And that he had safe houses I can go to when I go back to Konoha."
"That's good."
"I'm guessing his kunai are in here," I say as I hold up the weapons pouch. I open it and almost drop it. Those things are insane! I carefully reach in and pull out the kunai. There's writing on the handle, none of which I understand at first glance, and there are three blades.
"Well, we won't need to get you those kunai we talked about."
"Yeah we will," I say as I turn the kunai over in my hand. "These are the ones he used for Hiraishin." Ichika freezes as she looks at them.
"Don't even think about throwing them," she says.
"I wasn't!" And I really was not thinking about throwing them. There's no way I'm going to try to use a space time ninjutsu or seal if I don't know what the hell it's for.
"Good," Ichika says. "I don't want you getting lost in another dimension."
"That's a possibility?" I squeak.
"Of course it is," Ichika shrugs like it's no big deal. "Just wait until you start working with the masks when you're older. Then you get to deal with the barrier between the living world and the pure lands."
"What?" I ask, my voice even higher than before.
"Don't worry, you'll get used to it," she says. I roll my eyes before putting the kunai on the table. I look back into the pouch to find some kunai that don't have writing on them.
"Well, you were right after all," I say as I hold up one of the blank kunai. I immediately go to start sorting the kunai, causing Ichika to laugh at me again.
"What's so funny?"
"This is going to be the adamantine sealing chains all over again," she says. "I knew you would like those kunai, too."
"They're heavier," I say as I hold one of the blank ones. "And they seem more balanced for me."
"And they're the kunai that were used in different Uzushiogakure rituals," Ichika says. "And they were generally the go-to kunai for most shinobi from Uzu."
"That doesn't mean I'd like them," I say as I put the kunai I'm holding with the pile of blank ones.
"Mmhmm," Ichika hums. It reminds me so much of Jiji when I'd dismiss a piece of gossip he would share with me. "You're only allowed to work on it for an hour a day, if you fall behind on other training or chores you take a break until I think you're ready."
"Yes mom," I say as I turn my focus back to the kunai in front of me.
"Your mother would have kicked you thirty feet for saying something like that," Ichika huffs. I look over to the mountain lion to see amusement clear in her eyes. She's not angry at all. I smile a bit to myself as I turn back to the table and count all of the kunai.
I have four with the Hiraishin formulas on them, and fifteen without. By the disparity in the formula versus the no formula kunai, I feel dread pool in my stomach. I'm going to go through a lot of them before I'm ever able to make a somewhat decent formula.
"Can we make that an hour and a half?" Ichika pushes into my side, making me fall on the ground. I hear her walk out of the room and huff. "You could've just said no, ya know?"
Ichika has already taken my ability to study Hiraishin away twice in the few months I've been working on the jutsu. Dad's notes are more a stream of consciousness than anything else. I understand the basics of the jutsu. That you enter a dimensional void when you use it, that it requires more chakra if you try to send another person or object through it as well as yourself.
But I don't understand how to make my own formula.
Dad included his notes of Tobirama's notes. Those helped a lot. But it didn't solve the formula. Tobirama's formula is just a mixture of different kanji and hindi script, as well as other symbols. Something that's more common for a sealing technique.
But dad's roughly translates to "sword of a shinobi's love."
How the hell am I supposed to come up with a formula? Did they just pull it out of their-
"Kiku-chan!" A shrill voice calls. I look up to see a familiar hawk. The one to take my first letter to Jiji. He quickly became one of my favorites. Despite acting like a complete goofball, Haruto was one of the most reliable and fast hawks of those on the island.
"Hi Haruto-san!" I say as I look up to the sky, one of my forearms resting on my forehead.
"Ichika has you cleaning the docks again?" He asks as he swoops down. He lands on one of the posts on the dock, a scroll tied to his leg.
"Yes, and no water jutsus are allowed," I pout.
"You need to not work yourself so hard, hime!" The hawk chides.
"So I should do more manual labor to teach me that?" I ask as he extends his leg for me to take the scroll.
"Manual labor isn't a challenge for you," Haruto says. "You get so in your head so much that sometimes you're in the clouds. You need to learn to just be in the moment so you don't tire yourself out."
"I meditate for at least an hour every day for that," I say as I lay the broom I had been using on the dock. I plop down on the dock and dip my feet into the water.
"You need to have a clear mind for more than an hour a day, chica," Haruto says. "You need to rest." I look up at the hawk and feel my shoulders drop.
"I just have so much to do," I sigh.
"You won't be able to do anything if you're distracted in the field or run yourself into an early grave," Haruto says, a disapproving gleam in his sharp eyes.
"You're right," I mumble.
"I know I am," he gives a shrill laugh as he fluffs his brown feathers. "I'm going to go get a nap, the old man said you didn't have to respond to the letter right away." I nod as I play with the string of the scroll.
"Have a good nap, Haruto-san."
"You should take some naps yourself, sometimes chica!" Haruto calls as he flies away. I shake my head at the hawk before I turn back to the scroll in my hand. I'd just sent Jiji a letter and he normally takes a couple of days to respond. He must have responded in hours with the quick turnaround time.
I carefully unravel the scroll and as soon as I start reading I start to feel sick.
Kiku-hime,
This is not the letter I wanted to write tonight.
Oh this can't be good. Most of Jiji's letters have been filled with gossip minus the one warning me to not come back to Konoha and to get my supplies from somewhere else. Had things really gotten worse?
I have no idea as to tell you this in a way that will not worry you, but I must ask you to not return to Konoha for you and your brother's safety.
Oh.
Oh.
It had always been about my safety before. Naruto was relatively safe because he is the jinchūriki. What the hell was happening?
We received intelligence that Sunagakure is preparing for a large scale attack. On who exactly, we do not know. But from the lack of interest from the council and other information that I will not burden you with, it seems as though they are aligned with my former student, Orochimaru. While we do not know for sure what his plan is or his motivations, I believe that he is coming after me.
My blood runs cold. I think hard, trying to bring up the vague memories I know are somewhere, or were somewhere in my brain, but nothing comes up. I still know that I knew things from my last life that affected this one. I know I stopped something bad happening to the Uchiha clan.
But I don't know what I stopped anymore. Or what I could stop if I had those old memories. Coming to Uzushiogakure was the best decision I've ever made. But I started losing the old memories when I got here. I know I need to get stronger because things are going to happen, but I don't know what.
And it's been causing me to struggle with my sleep more than ever before.
I put the scroll on the dock beside me and cover my face with my hands. I close my eyes and try to think, but I see nothing. Nothing at all. I try to picture my mindscape, a technique that I've read about extensively in the last few weeks, but I still can't access it. My head starts to hurt, but I keep trying. I need these memories to save Jiji.
I can't lose him, too.
I try to dive into the mindscape again and this time I can see a dark room. I try to go closer, to see what's inside, but I'm pulled out of the space so fast I think I might have whiplash.
"Stop there, Uzumaki Kikuko," Kairi says firmly. I open my eyes to see the seagull looking at me. I can't tell what she's feeling as she sits on the post beside me. "I had hoped you were one of the ones whose memories faded quickly."
"What do you mean?" I ask as I look back out to the ocean. The sun is starting to set. It looks as beautiful as it always does, despite the storm that rages inside of my mind.
"The Uzumaki regularly toe the line between life and death," Kairi says.
"Like the thing with the masks?" I ask.
"Like the thing with the masks," she says. "Although you will not touch them until you are of age."
"Trust me," I say as I look back up at her. "I won't." She shakes her head at me before she looks back out at the water.
"Like I said, the Uzumaki regularly toe the line between life and death. Some members of your clan are more associated with their strong life forces like Uzumaki Mito who survived the extraction of Kurama."
"So others were associated with death?" I pick the scroll from Jiji up and start fiddling with it again.
"They're not talked about as much," Kairi says. "Kahana was one of those who were more associated with death."
"Really?"
"She was, it was why she consulted the oracle. She had a bad feeling that she just couldn't shake, so she went to an in-between."
"An in-between?" I ask, looking up from the scroll.
"Someone who retained all their memories from their past life or lives," Kairi says quietly. "Those who were strongly associated with life never had conscious memories of their past lives although an in-between could access them for those individuals sometimes. They were constantly on the battlefield and often engaged in high profile battles. They were often chosen as jinchūriki as well."
"Was- was this one of the reasons Uzushio was destroyed? Because someone could access these past lives and be that powerful?"
"We don't know," Kairi looks down at the water in front of us. "It was a clan secret, as far as we know even Ashina didn't spread that information and he was even more of a gossip than the beetles." I can't help but snort. The beetles are the biggest gossips on the island.
"Those who were associated with death would help with funerals, passing over, childbirth, and more secret missions," Kairi says. "They often assisted in the transitions between life and death, they often felt that call at a young age. It's instinctual for them. They were called Guardians." I feel my throat tighten at the description. It reminds me of the night I decided to visit Hiroto-oji. The night he died.
"They were the ones who had their memories of a past life and acted on it at a young age. They often acted alone, afraid to tell those around them what was happening in their minds." I feel my heart start to beat faster as Kairi continues to talk.
"They were often too young to know the consequences for those decisions until it was too late. They were often away from the village, the children of merchants or migrant farmers. Unable to hear the legends and history of your people until it was too late."
"What do you mean consequences?" I ask. My knuckles have turned a bright white color and I can already feel the dull ache of clenching onto the scroll for so long.
"It's called equivalent exchange," she says. "Everything in life is a trade. To take something away or to bring something into the world you must give something of equal value."