Volume 2 chapter 6

As Deyna and Blackpaw filed out of the room, Sixclaw remained as One-Eye made his way back to the desk. The wildcat sat down with a sigh, then glanced up as he adjusted his large overcoat. "Need something?"

"Not really. Wait, scratch that, I was wondering-" said Sixclaw. "-How things have been in my absence."

"Oh, decent." said One-Eye, slowly moving his paw to unplug the security camera. "Ok, cameras off."

Sixclaw immediately rushed forward and embraced the wildcat, burying her face in his suit jacket, as One-Eye rested his chin on her head. " 'missed you." muttered the warlord

"Me too."

"How was Redwall?" asked One-Eye.

"Shitty." replied Sixclaw. "They're somehow more technologically inferior than the Flatlands, if that's even possible. And the creatures were a bunch of tinpot fools."

"Eh, I don't think that'll last for long." said One-Eye, a grimace crossing his scarred visage. "Things are changing all over."

"You're the one who's changing." said Sixclaw, a playful smile flitting across her face. "For the better, I think.

"Maybe," said One-Eye.

The two cats sat in the office and talked for a while, about life, the universe, and everything, before the subject inevitably came to the matter at hand, and then to Deyna.

"You're going to have to let him go, One-Eye." said Sixclaw.

"I really don't," replied the warlord "and I'll beat him like a cheap rug if he tries anything."

"All due respect, I doubt you could. You're still going to rehab a month after the incident." said Sixclaw. "At this rate, you would be the cheap rug in that scenario."

"Oh, come on, I'm not that weak." Protested One-Eye.

"Whatever you say."

Meanwhile, Deyna had run out of alcohol, and so, he decided, it was time to go get some more.

He stood up, wobbled a bit, and walked out the door of his apartment, the one he vacated only 6 months ago, and ran square into Crabfang and Red, who were both dressed fairly nicely, with several medals adorning their bodies.

Deyna and Crabfang weren't acquainted, but Red recognized the otter from a game of Five Finger Fillet a while back.

Crabfang immediately pulled a short pistol from the inside of his jacket. "Fucking pervert, I ought ta shoot your fucking head clean off your shoulders."

"Hey, calm down, Crabs." Said Red. "I know this guy."

"Oh? I always knew you were other people's side piece!"

"Says the 5'1 motherfucker who faked his own death and didn't even invite me!" Red shot back.

As the couple sniped at each other, Deyna made the rational decision to back away slowly. As he made his way down the hall, the otter heard Crabfang rasp out a "Hey!"

"Yes?" Replied the otter.

Red and Crabfang ran up to him. "We like your vibe. Do you want to go out for drinks?"

Deyna deliberated for a moment. Ah, to the gates with it. "Sure, not like I've got anything better to do."

"But you can't really go out dressed like a male stripper." Said Crabfang, gesturing at the otter.

The otter glanced down at his kilt. "My outfit is fine. And what even is a stripper?"

Crabfang and Red exchanged a look. "You've got a lot to learn, now get some fucking clothes on."

Ten minutes later, Deyna walked out of the room, wearing a suit that appeared to be two sizes too small, and walked behind the two Skullians to an elevator.

"Afternoon, Dmitri." said Crabfang, addressing the liftman, a large weasel, covered in tattoos.

Deyna noticed a grimy silver circle on the liftman's belt. "You fought in the war too?"

Dmitri laughed. "Who didn't? Now buckle up, it's going to be a bumpy ride."

Deyna let out a laugh. "It's just a simple elevator ride, why would I need to-"

The elevator's clamp released, and it dropped at 95 KMH, a ride during which Deyna threw up somewhere around the halfway point.

A/N

Sorry for my absence, I had a lot of issues pop up in my personal life, so I decided to go on a hiatus to deal with them.

R&R!