First mate's log:

October 3, 1972

Marcia told me about her latest problem. No, it's nothing to do with a boy or a school club, although it does have to do with a school activity. The high school is going to have Family Night Frolics two weeks from Friday, as a fundraiser.

"Do you want me to buy a couple of tickets?" Maybe I could take Mary Ann. Even though we don't have kids, she knows all the teenagers from her pizza parlor, and I see a lot of them on the ferry. It wouldn't be a very romantic date, but it would be fun.

"That'd be great, but it's actually the middle school who's in charge of the tickets, so you can buy them from Peter or Jan."

"I will. So what are the high-schoolers doing?"

"Some of us are in the show."

"Well, that should be no problem for you, after being in Romeo & Juliet, and singing on TV."

"I'm fine performing myself, but because it's 'family,' I need to be up there with a family member."

"I'm sure Greg wouldn't mind singing with you. He could play his guitar."

"No, it has to be family who aren't in high school."

"Oh, well, Peter and your sisters were in the Glee Club." Of course, that was before Peter's voice changed.

"They really want us to perform with our parents."

"That's still no problem. Your mom is a great singer, and she did that church solo a few Christmases ago."

"I know, and I know everyone will love her. The problem is, I promised we'd sing a duet, and I didn't ask her first."

"Oh. Then you better talk to her soon."

"I know, I'm just trying to get my nerve up."

I wished her luck, as I always do with the Bradys when they confide in me.

Carol Brady's diary:

October 6, 1972

Oh, gosh, Greg and Marcia have talked me into singing at Family Night Frolics with her! I knew about FNF of course, because I'm on the PTA, and I agreed that it would be a great fundraiser. I just never pictured performing myself. Yes, I love to sing, but it's different somehow in church, or at home. I'll do it, but I'm not looking forward to it.

I've looked through some of Greg's music magazines that include lyrics. Honestly, some of their expressions! Of course, some of the singers are so incoherent, I never would've guessed at the words from listening to the radio. It reminds me of when the men were a deliberately bad rock combo, the Gnats. Even the modern music I like is mostly sung by men, so we'd have to change the lyrics, like for Davy Jones's "Girl."

Hopefully, we'll find a duet that works for us in time for the show, which is only two weeks away! Plus, there's rehearsals and costumes and I guess choreography. I know this is for a benefit, but I still want a performance that won't embarrass either of us.

October 9, 1972

I talked to Sam the butcher about Family Night Frolics. Yeah, Mrs. Brady is going to do the duet with Marcia, although she's nervous about it. Sam already took a bunch of tickets from Alice to sell at his shop, so I bought one from him instead of Peter or Jan.

"...But then she got mad at me because I can't take her to the show."

"Why not?"

"I've got bowling practice that night on Blenford and we're getting ready for a big tournament."

"Gee, that's too bad."

"Are you goin'?"

"Yeah, I'm taking Mary Ann. But I don't have any hobbies that involve teams."

I didn't mention that I'm a lot closer to the Brady kids than he is, since I'm like an honorary uncle and saw them all grow up. I mean, Alice is like family, so of course she wants to go, but I don't know if Sam understands that. I didn't say that though, because it's trickier getting involved in middle-aged people's love lives.

October 12, 1972

The talent show is a week from tomorrow, but luckily Marcia agreed to do "an old Broadway song." By that, she didn't mean the 1920s. She meant the late '50s, when she was alive but too little to remember the music. So we're doing "Together (Wherever We Go)," from Gypsy. Luckily, it's in the range for both of us. We've agreed to make it fun and funny, to hold the audience's interest, while still respecting the song.

We were talking about different costume possibilities, when Greg came home and said that not enough families had signed up yet. So he'd volunteered himself and Mike! My dear husband of course nudged me into performing as much as the kids did, but, well, I'm afraid he doesn't have any talent, at least not the kind for a variety show. But he does have a wonderful speaking voice, inherited (I've heard from Bobo and others) from his grandfather the judge.

Greg's teacher has given him a poem for Mike to read, accompanied by Greg's guitar. Mike is dubious, but of course he couldn't refuse.

October 15, 1972

Poor Skipper got caught up in Sam and Alice's fight, but it wasn't my fault. Jan and Cindy decided that the way to get Sam to take Alice to Family Night Frolics was to make him jealous. So they told him about selling two tickets to the Skipper, which is true, but he's taking a Blenford lady he's been seeing lately. They made it sound to Sam like the Skipper was taking Alice, without actually saying that. So Sam went over to the Bradys' house and he was real mad, but he insisted that Alice was going to the event with him. She of course accepted, but she was very confused.

Then Sam wanted to get in a fistfight with the Skipper, who was also very confused. They didn't actually hit each other, but they got real personal, insulting each other's appearance and intelligence, and the Army and the Navy!

I finally managed to say, "The Skipper doesn't like Alice that way, just her cooking."

"Oh, not good enough for ya, huh?"

The Skipper said, "She's a fine woman but she belongs with you, Sam."

That calmed Sam down enough that he asked why Jan and Cindy made him think the Skipper and Alice were an item. The three of us all had a good laugh about it when we figured it out. And the two of them shook hands. We've agreed we won't mention this to Alice, and Sam said he forgives the two girls.

October 18, 1972

As busy as I am getting ready for Family Night Frolics, I've entered a contest my art club is having. Mike is also busy, although he and Greg are keeping it a secret exactly what they're doing with their "spoken word and acoustic guitar" piece. Nonetheless, I've drafted him as my model.

I've been learning about sculpture, particularly since coming home from Hawaii and seeing their local art. But I'm doing a more European, sort of Greco-Roman style. It won't be a full statue, since I don't have the time and Mike doesn't have the patience. It's just a bust. And, yes, Mike has joked about "boom or bust."

I had to compliment him on his head, neck, and shoulders, but I meant it. And now that he's been growing his hair out since summer, it's very curly and classical-looking. I was speaking the truth when I said he's the most handsome man I know. I just hope I can do him justice.

The talent show is this Friday, and the art contest is a week from Friday. So I'm mostly making sketches this week.

At least Alice and I are done with the costumes for me, Marcia, Greg, and Mike. The fellas will be in tuxedos, while we will be hoboes, but very cute and classy Broadway hoboes. Yes, we'll have to dance in baggy pants, but we'll do our best.

October 21, 1972

We all had fun at Family Night Frolics. Mary Ann and I agreed we'd like to do something like that with our kids in twenty years or so. Yeah, we're not as talented as Ginger, but most people aren't. And sometimes it's nice to see what ordinary people can do onstage.

Mrs. Brady and Marcia did a fun song & dance as hoboes, which Ginger said was from Gypsy, but they weren't Gypsies. And I thought that was about a stripper anyway, but they didn't strip of course.

Mr. Brady and Greg did a thing where the father read a serious poem and the son played guitar, but the other two Brady boys tossed down silly props from the rafters. That was probably the funniest act of all, and it was the finale.

Oh, and I finally met Skipper's Blenford girlfriend, Joyce. She's a pretty blonde widow, about forty years old. I don't know if it's serious, but it might mean something that he brought her to a school event when neither of them has kids.

October 24, 1972

It's been a few days since Family Night Frolics, but I've been too busy to catch up. It all worked out and I really enjoyed myself, despite my butterflies. We've gotten so many compliments, Marcia and I, but just as many for Mike and Greg. The guys took a humorous approach, with the help of Peter and Bobby on props. It really was a family event for us. Jan and Cindy were in the audience of course, with some of the childless couples we know. The event met the fundraising goal, which is good, because even though the high school isn't very old, it can use an upgrade.

I've been spending more time on Mike's bust of course. It's really coming along, and I hope it'll be ready on Friday night.

(I won't tell you about the very naughty pun Mike made about my bust, but I have to motivate him somehow.)