Disclaimer: I don't own Futurama so do not sue as I wrote in my previous story; all I own is my sacred irregular Oreos. Except Now I traded them for my barrel of tangled Christmas lights. Whatever just don't sue. Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaase!

Diary of Amy Wong

I woke up at Mars in my parent's house with Betsy licking my face.

I got up and picked up my precious ambergris perfume and slipped on a banana peel that got under my foot somehow and the ambergris smashed and my butler told me told me off for swearing in Chinese.

I didn't know he knew Chinese!

But then he told me that my parents could easily pay for a clone of a sperm wale, and then make it vomit to get more ambergris.

Anyway at work, Fry came late and said something about Bender half killing him but I said to threaten him about telling the people of Osiris 4.

We had pickle sandwiches for breakfast, when I was opening mine, the professor tried to take some of my blood. I threw my sandwich at him and his nose melted of.

He cloned another nose for himself and attached a laser gun too his chest while he was at it. But Leela cut it of when he accidentally fired it at nibbler.

Fry, Leela, and Bender had to deliver some toilet seats to Urectum.

Hermes power stapler stapled him to the roof but luckily; the professor spilled a box of glowing noses from his machine on it. I programmed it to work properly and then Hermes fell onto a barrel of toxic waste and then said it tasted like pudding. Bender, Fry and Leela had a delivery of petrol to Oxide, the gas planet and they destroyed the entire civilisation. Zoidberg got an evil extra head that ate up everything in the building, but the Professor took it of. Zoidberg gave me $20 for my toenail clippings he thought they were potato chips, but at least I got $20. I used it too by some raw meat that I chucked at it at Zoidberg's chicken lawyer at the social security office when I was paying them and he threw his fake hand at me. When I got back, Hazuzu ate up Zoidberg and me, Leela, Fry, Bender, and the Professor shrunk us to get him out. I slipped on some gunk in his lower intestine and landed on his appendix. Anyway, we got out all right and it was a pretty normal day.

Signed, Amy Wong.

One free Christmas light to anyone who reviews! (Maybe.)