Neon Genesis Evangelion
Disclaimer: Yes, I own Neon Genesis Evangelion. You believe me right? Well I DO! Of course I do...in an alternative life other than the one in which I'm a female Shinji. Anyways, what matters is this dimension, in which case, I DON'T own EVA. It should be obvious, otherwise this wouldn't be a fanfic, now would it?
If you haven't seen at least the End of Evangelion, then this may contain spoilers. However, that never stops me from reading this stuff, so enjoy.
Note: Edited...slightly. Maybe more people will read it! Not that it matters, since I never finish any of the fics I write anyways. Oh, and not to mention my limited net access. La la la la.
First Book - Genesis
The crimson waves crash against the shore. The world is dark and cold. Crosses of light stand as an eternal memoria to all that have died at the world's end, however, the number of crosses is two short. Where are these crosses? Could it mean that at the end of the world, as in the begining, there is two.
The end is the begining and the begining is the end. There is pain and suffering in childbirth, pain and suffering in life, and pain and suffering at death. Pain and suffering. Yet, we live. Or, they live. The two that remain behind after all humanity sailed off the edge of the world.
Yet, happiness can be found anywhere. Can too, happiness be found in a world such as this? A world left awash in a sea of blood, filled with glowing memorials to the dead. Why? Why is this so? What is God's purpose in this? It is not for us to comprehend.
Shinji looks down at his hands, the hands that wrung the neck of Asuka. She...she wasn't really alive, was she? But yet, she seemed to stir. Bandages cover the injuries she received by the EVA, but who tended to her.
"Why...why are we here, Asuka? Why are you here? WHY ARE YOU HERE! Why is it you that was left to keep me company? You do not speak. You do not move. Am I alone? How can I live like this!"
Shinji cries out, frustracted and unable to change his reality. He grabs his head in desperation trying to wish it all away, but away it will not go.
"Shinji...", a familiar voice calls out to him.
He turns to the endless sea of blood.
"Ayanami?", he inquires, seeing at first, a visage that appears to be Rei.
Slowly the image shifts into that of his mother, Yui.
"Okaasan?" (Mother?)
She nods, saying nothing. Shinji begins to stand, but thoughts enter his mind, paralyzing him.
His mind goes back to his childhood. Playing alone in the park.
(Evanescence - Hello)
Playground school bell rings again
Rain clouds come to play again
-He suddenly finds himself looking at Asuka and at the hands that had been around her throat.-
Has no one told you she's not breathing?
Hello
-He turns to his mother only to see himself.-
I'm your mind giving you
Someone to talk to
Hello
-The image of himself shifts into Rei. She smiles slightly at him.-
If I smile and don't believe
Soon I know I'll wake from this dream
-Rei slowly fades into an image of Asuka in her yellow dress and hands on her hips.-
Don't try to fix me I'm not broken
-Asuka slowly becomes Misato.-
Hello
I'm the lie living for you so you can hide
Don't cry
-Misato becomes Asuka again.-
Suddenly I know I'm not sleeping
Hello
I'm still here
All that's left of yesterday
-Asuka slowly becomes Yui, and Yui shrinks in size and becomes a child, yet Shinji is reminded of Kaoru.-
(End Song)
"She's not breathing. You took the breath out of her. You made an important decision, my baby. As much as it would hurt you, you decided to live with the companionship of another. I tended to her wounds, sent Death away, took away her pain, and let her drink the life giving milk from my own breast. I heard your heart Shinji, I know your mind. I restored her to you, so that you two may live together in this new world. And what do you do? Your hands, like the hands of those who came before, they shed blood. They kill. I tended her wounds...and you take her life."
"I...I...I...I'm sorry. I...I...", Shinji stutters.
"You were afraid. That doesn't justify it.", She remarks.
"I know it doesn't! Someone else should be here!"
"No Shinji, you belong here. You wanted to be here. You made an important decision, and I'm glad that you did. I'm proud of you for that. However, it saddens me that you hurt Asuka."
"I...I thought she was..."
"Dead? Ye of little faith, my son. She's not breathing, but she's not dead...yet.", She remarks.
"But you said!"
"I know what I said. You took her life, but her soul is still inside. Else you would see the cross of her memorial. She can live again. All she needs is the Breath of Life. First, I have something important for you to do."
"Why me? I'll probably fail.", Shinji degrads himself averting his gaze.
"You and Asuka are the only ones who can do this. You are the last humans alive. This is how it should be.", She comments.
"How it should be? Why the HELL SHOULD IT BE LIKE THIS! IT'S HELL!", Shinji protests.
"Happiness can be found anywhere, even in this hell on earth, if you will let it. Please, have faith in me, my boy. I love you very much, and I have lived in your pain. This is how it will be. The begining and the end are one. This world will breath again. The crimson sea will receed and clear water will flow, and grass will grow, animals will graze and mate and bear young. Trees will bud and blossom and bear fruit for you to eat. When the world was created, in six days, man was created on the sixth. Man needed a companion, so from man came woman. And out of woman, man will be born again. Even in the end, there will be two. I have chosen you, Shinji, and Asuka. My Adam and Eve. The task that I appoint to you, is to live. Ne, not merely to live, but to replenish this land. I want you and Asuka to come together and replenish each other and this world. I give her to you, and you to her. Fill this land with life, cover it once more with your kind."
"You...you...you're tell...telling me to...Asuka...bu...bu...but!"
"Together. Of your own will. Both consent. You have my blessing and favor. She will wake soon. I will be watching, my children. I have much that I must do before you can enter the Garden.", She speaks and begins to fade away.
"WAIT! Are you --?", Shinji cries out, but she is already gone.
Shinji shakes his head.
"I can't do it. I can't do it. I can't do it. I...I'd...maybe I'd...uh...uh...ugggghhh."
Shinji wipes the blood from his nose.
"I'd like to...it...might be nice...but...Asuka."
"I want to be just like Misato."
"NO!"
"It can be beautiful. Let it be beautiful, as it was in the begining."
"Beautiful? It's hideous!", Shinji protests.
"That was hideous to you, to them, it was a temporary fullfillment. It wasn't beautiful, but it wasn't ugly to them either. Man deserves a woman, and woman deserves a man. Formed from one body, to one body they return. It was beautiful in the begining. Shinji, it will be beautiful again. Don't rush it. You have time. Let it happen if it happens. Don't stop it."
"..."
Shinji lays down, seeing nothing else that he can do.
(Evanescence - My Tourniquet)
I tried to kill the pain
But only brought more
I lay dying
And I'm pouring crimson regret and betrayal
I'm dying, praying, bleeding, and screaming
Am I too lost to be saved
Am I too lost
My God
My tourniquet
Return to me salvation
My God
My tourniquet
Return to me salvation
Do you remember me
Lost for so long
Will you be on the other side
Or will you forget me
I'm dying, praying, bleeding, and screaming
Am I too lost to be saved
Am I too lost
My God
My tourniquet
Return to me salvation
My God
My tourniquet
Return to me salvation
My wounds cry for the grave
My soul cries for deliverance
Will I be denied Christ
Tourniquet
My suicide
(End Song)
Slowly into slumber, on the beach of the crimson sea, Shinji finds himself entering the realm of dreams, away from the harsh cruelty of his reality.
At the same time, Asuka finally stirs to consciousness and sits up.
"I'm...alive?", she asks in disbelief.
She looks out at the illuminated crosses and the endless ocean of blood. She covers her mouth in disgust.
Examing herself, she notices that her wounds have been tended to and that she has been bandaged.
"Who...tended to me?", she wonders out loud.
Asuka turns and sees Shinji.
"Did...Shinji baka (idiot)? No, not Shinji."
She struggles to stand, her legs wobble and waver, ready to give way and collapse. Looking around, she finds only death and destruction.
"No! Everyone! They're gone! They're gone!"
The bitter red head collapses in on herself mourning. She fought so hard and for nothing. Her tears trickle and roll off her form and soak into the ground. Grass slowly sprouts from where it lands.