AN: *crawls from under a rock, dusts self off and grins* NEXT PIECE POSTED! *crickets chirp* Aww, C'mon guys.. I came back.... a little sympathy for poor Phoe-chan? *crickets quit chirping*
Poo. ;_;
Disclaimer: I got a lovely bunch o' coconuts... that is all that I own. Holy Grail, Ruroken, neither do I own! Oh, I would never have to do this for *SACK*
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Rurouni Kenshin and the Holy Sakabato
Scene 17
----------
GUESTS: [crying; looting; graverobbing and calling insurance agencies]
KONDO: Well, this is the main hall. We're going to have all this knocked through and made into one big, uh, swimming pool.
SAITOH: Swimming pool?
KONDO: Yes. Much cheaper than the original idea for a labrinyth.
GUEST: There he is!
KONDO: Oh, bloody hell.
[exciting music, a little off key]
SAITOH: Ha ha ha! [dives forward, leaving his katana behind] Hey! Ha ha!
KONDO: Hold it! Stop it! Hold it! Hold it! Hold it! Hold it! Hold it! Please! First of all, if you're going to attack, you better take your sword with you, secondly, these are my guests!
SAITOH: Sorry. Sorry. You see what I mean? I just get carried away. My doctor says I have obsessive-compulsive-slashing disorder. Sorry! Sorry, everyone.
GUEST #1: He's killed the best dog!
GUESTS: [yelling; shrieking; howling; and squealing]
KONDO: Hold it! Hold it! Please! Hold it! This is Sir Saitoh from the Dojo of Kamiya, a very brave and influential samurai, although a bit scary with those eyes, and my special guest here today.
SAITOH: Um, hello. My name is Saitoh and I'm an alcoholic.
GUEST #2: He killed my auntie!
GUESTS: [playing twister]
KONDO: Please! Please! This is supposed to be a happy occasion! Let's not bicker and argue about who killed who. We are here today to witness the union of two young people in the joyful bond of the holy wedlock and drink lots of beer. Unfortunately, one of them, my student, Okita, has just fallen to his death. But, in that happening, I have gained two million dollars on that insurance policy I took out last week!
GUESTS: Oh! Oh, no!
KONDO: But I don't want to think I've not lost a studet, so much as... gained a lovely daughter! [clap clap clap] For, since the tragic death of her cat--
GUEST #2: It's not quite dead!
KONDO: Since the near fatal wounding of her cat--
GUEST #2: It's getting better!
KONDO: For, since her own talking cat, who, when it seemed about to recover, suddenly felt the icy hand of death upon it. [random guard strangles cat and tosses into a vat of mustard]
CAT: GURGLE!
GUEST #2: Oh, it's crispy!
KONDO: And I want it's only owner to look upon me as her old pappy, in a very real and legally binding sense. [clap clap clap] And I feel sure that the merger-- er, the union between the Moon girl and the brave, but creepy, Sir Saitoh of Kamiya--
SAITOH: Over your dead body, old man.
GUEST #2: Look! The dead shinsengumi!
GUESTS: Oooh! The dead Okita!
EIJI: He's not quite dead.
OKITA: No, I feel much better. [Kawaii grin]
KONDO: You fell out of the Tall Tower, you baka! And there were alligators, jagged rocks and a box of thumbtacks at the bottom of the tower!
OKITA: No, I was saved at the last minute. [smug grin]
KONDO: How?! What?! How?
SAITOH: Three excellent questions, genius.
OKITA: Well, I'll tell you. [cough]
KONDO: Not like that! Not like that! No! Stop it! I don't need them knowing
GUESTS: [gasp-shock] He's going to tell! Eww, he's coughing up blood!
KONDO: Shut uuup!
GUESTS: [gagging] He's gonna faint!
KONDO: Shut up!
GUESTS: [puking] He's making us sick!
KONDO: Shut up!
GUESTS: [deducing] He's gay!
KONDO: Not like that! I raised no gay student!
GUESTS: [staring] He's got TB! He's gonna DIE!
EIJI: Quickly, sir!
GUESTS: [panicing mob] He's gonna infect us all!
EIJI: Come this way! Before the contamination crew gets here!
GUESTS: [coughing] WE'RE MELTING! AHH, WE'RE DYING! HELP US!
SAITOH: No! It's not right for my idiom! I can run through a crowd of sickly people!
GUESTS: [collapsing] AIIEEE!
SAITOH: I must escape more... [sigh]
GUESTS: [dying] Oh, THE PAIN!
EIJI: Safely, sir?
SAITOH: Dramatically!
EIJI: ...
GUESTS: [twitching] gurglemumbletwitch...
SAITOH: [grabs a rope and swings out, crashing into a cactus, two ice sculptures and a cheese statue of Barney] ARGGHH!
GUESTS: [dead] 10! 8.5! 9! 9.5!
SAITOH: Excuse me. Could, uh-- could somebody give me some tweezers... please?
End Scene 17
----------
AN: After not touching this for months this was a little hard to get back into the 'feel'. ^^; Ah, well. Hope you enjoyed!
If you're wanting on my update list, I've started it over merely because I know it's been months since I updated an RK fic and some of the people who were on the original list don't even read these anymore. If you want to, just please leave me a note in your review, with your email address. Or send me a note at tenkensgirl@hotmail.com.
Thanks! And feel free to leave me a review :D
**Ignore the grammar, I do**
Phoe-chan
Poo. ;_;
Disclaimer: I got a lovely bunch o' coconuts... that is all that I own. Holy Grail, Ruroken, neither do I own! Oh, I would never have to do this for *SACK*
----------
Rurouni Kenshin and the Holy Sakabato
Scene 17
----------
GUESTS: [crying; looting; graverobbing and calling insurance agencies]
KONDO: Well, this is the main hall. We're going to have all this knocked through and made into one big, uh, swimming pool.
SAITOH: Swimming pool?
KONDO: Yes. Much cheaper than the original idea for a labrinyth.
GUEST: There he is!
KONDO: Oh, bloody hell.
[exciting music, a little off key]
SAITOH: Ha ha ha! [dives forward, leaving his katana behind] Hey! Ha ha!
KONDO: Hold it! Stop it! Hold it! Hold it! Hold it! Hold it! Hold it! Please! First of all, if you're going to attack, you better take your sword with you, secondly, these are my guests!
SAITOH: Sorry. Sorry. You see what I mean? I just get carried away. My doctor says I have obsessive-compulsive-slashing disorder. Sorry! Sorry, everyone.
GUEST #1: He's killed the best dog!
GUESTS: [yelling; shrieking; howling; and squealing]
KONDO: Hold it! Hold it! Please! Hold it! This is Sir Saitoh from the Dojo of Kamiya, a very brave and influential samurai, although a bit scary with those eyes, and my special guest here today.
SAITOH: Um, hello. My name is Saitoh and I'm an alcoholic.
GUEST #2: He killed my auntie!
GUESTS: [playing twister]
KONDO: Please! Please! This is supposed to be a happy occasion! Let's not bicker and argue about who killed who. We are here today to witness the union of two young people in the joyful bond of the holy wedlock and drink lots of beer. Unfortunately, one of them, my student, Okita, has just fallen to his death. But, in that happening, I have gained two million dollars on that insurance policy I took out last week!
GUESTS: Oh! Oh, no!
KONDO: But I don't want to think I've not lost a studet, so much as... gained a lovely daughter! [clap clap clap] For, since the tragic death of her cat--
GUEST #2: It's not quite dead!
KONDO: Since the near fatal wounding of her cat--
GUEST #2: It's getting better!
KONDO: For, since her own talking cat, who, when it seemed about to recover, suddenly felt the icy hand of death upon it. [random guard strangles cat and tosses into a vat of mustard]
CAT: GURGLE!
GUEST #2: Oh, it's crispy!
KONDO: And I want it's only owner to look upon me as her old pappy, in a very real and legally binding sense. [clap clap clap] And I feel sure that the merger-- er, the union between the Moon girl and the brave, but creepy, Sir Saitoh of Kamiya--
SAITOH: Over your dead body, old man.
GUEST #2: Look! The dead shinsengumi!
GUESTS: Oooh! The dead Okita!
EIJI: He's not quite dead.
OKITA: No, I feel much better. [Kawaii grin]
KONDO: You fell out of the Tall Tower, you baka! And there were alligators, jagged rocks and a box of thumbtacks at the bottom of the tower!
OKITA: No, I was saved at the last minute. [smug grin]
KONDO: How?! What?! How?
SAITOH: Three excellent questions, genius.
OKITA: Well, I'll tell you. [cough]
KONDO: Not like that! Not like that! No! Stop it! I don't need them knowing
GUESTS: [gasp-shock] He's going to tell! Eww, he's coughing up blood!
KONDO: Shut uuup!
GUESTS: [gagging] He's gonna faint!
KONDO: Shut up!
GUESTS: [puking] He's making us sick!
KONDO: Shut up!
GUESTS: [deducing] He's gay!
KONDO: Not like that! I raised no gay student!
GUESTS: [staring] He's got TB! He's gonna DIE!
EIJI: Quickly, sir!
GUESTS: [panicing mob] He's gonna infect us all!
EIJI: Come this way! Before the contamination crew gets here!
GUESTS: [coughing] WE'RE MELTING! AHH, WE'RE DYING! HELP US!
SAITOH: No! It's not right for my idiom! I can run through a crowd of sickly people!
GUESTS: [collapsing] AIIEEE!
SAITOH: I must escape more... [sigh]
GUESTS: [dying] Oh, THE PAIN!
EIJI: Safely, sir?
SAITOH: Dramatically!
EIJI: ...
GUESTS: [twitching] gurglemumbletwitch...
SAITOH: [grabs a rope and swings out, crashing into a cactus, two ice sculptures and a cheese statue of Barney] ARGGHH!
GUESTS: [dead] 10! 8.5! 9! 9.5!
SAITOH: Excuse me. Could, uh-- could somebody give me some tweezers... please?
End Scene 17
----------
AN: After not touching this for months this was a little hard to get back into the 'feel'. ^^; Ah, well. Hope you enjoyed!
If you're wanting on my update list, I've started it over merely because I know it's been months since I updated an RK fic and some of the people who were on the original list don't even read these anymore. If you want to, just please leave me a note in your review, with your email address. Or send me a note at tenkensgirl@hotmail.com.
Thanks! And feel free to leave me a review :D
**Ignore the grammar, I do**
Phoe-chan