A/N: Safaris are fun, and they never work out well for us. Such is the case in our latest chapter. Please review!

Chapter Twenty-four

Finally…The Laughter

SAFARI

"As long as we don't meet someone creepy like Dennis, I'm fine," Sara said. Hiei nodded in agreement and Faythe shuddered.

"First up," the guide was shouting, "is the gazelle. Notice how gracefully he jumps."

"Actually," Taro said quietly, "I'm noticing that thing sneaking up on him."

"That's a lion, dear," Kurama told him.

"He's still maturing," the guide continued, completely oblivious to what was going on behind him.

"Look out!" Taro shouted.

FIVE MINUTES LATER

Faythe patted Taro on the shoulder. "It's alright. He couldn't understand you anyway."

Taro nodded sadly. He smiled at Faythe. "Mai shing toke."

"Translation, please?"

"He said, 'That's life sometimes,'" Sara told them.

"Next up," the guide shouted over the crowd, buzzing with excitement. "We have the hippo! This is my favorite animal. Did you know that hippos' sweat is pink?"

"Did you know that hippos could destroy a boat, or car, in a matter of seconds?" Sara shouted.

The tour guide was quite for a minute. "Now, now, young lady. No need to scare the other people here."

"Honestly, Sara," Faythe said.

"Sometimes you scare me," Hiei added.

Sara just smiled.

The tour guide cleared his throat. "Ahem, yes, well, next we have the lovely and graceful giraffe. This animal is one of the most practical specimens on the plains. Their long necks help them reach leaves, their long legs help tem escape predators, and their unique coloring helps them blend in with their environment."

"So…what's up with the little knobs on their heads?" Jake asked skeptically.

By this time, the tour guide was reminding them of a bleated tour guide in another type of Animal Kingdom. "Maybe we should lay off," Faythe said cautiously.

Sara rolled her eyes. "He's not going to be like Dennis."

"How do you know?"

Sara gave Faythe a look. "I just know. Besides, the guys wouldn't let him take us." She looked at Hiei. "Right?"

"Of course."

"Can I please continue the tour now?"

The group looked at the guide. "Alright, alright," Faythe said. "No need to be so rude."

Haldir was about to start another speech, Aragorn could tell. "Haldir…don't."

Haldir nodded.

"Good," the guide said. "This…is a…"

"It's a unicorn!" the little girl next to Faythe shouted. "See, Mommy? I told you they're real!"

The guide was beginning to look like he wanted to throttle someone. "It's a ZEBRA! ZEBRA are some of the most MAJESTIC CREATURES I know of! No one knows why the ZEBRA have their unusual markings, but no two ZEBRA have the same stripes. ZEBRA!"

Jake snorted. "Wow…he's lost it."

Taro smiled. "I know this one! Zebra have stripes so that they can blend in with each other! That way, a predator can't tell one zebra from another!"

"Taro, that was probably not the thing to say," Kurama said quietly.

"The one time he knows what the hell we're talking about…" Hiei muttered.

The guide was staring at Taro. This just wasn't his day. "Shut up! I swear to God, I'll…"

"Give us candy?" the little girl asked.

Sara smiled at Faythe. "Ten bucks says he leaves us here."

Faythe declined the bet.

The tour guide had a…mild meltdown. He started laughing manically and jumped off the bus/jeep thing. The driver, luckily, still had his wits about him, knew where he was going, and continued the tour.

Sara jumped up and grabbed a mike from the rack of back-ups in the front. "Welcome to the African Serengeti! Now, we're going to be doing things my way." She took swift control of things.

The drive decided it would be in his best interests to stay alive, so he did everything Sara told him. Her first order was, "Go back to the lions. And get me a gazelle."

AFRICA…SARA'S WAY

"Are any of you squeamish?"

Taro started to raise his hand.

"Put your hand down. You don't even know what that means."

"You don't have to be rude, young lady," an elderly woman next to Taro said. "Treating such a nice young man like that. What is this world coming to?"

Sara looked surprised for a moment. "Right…we're gong to see this place the real way. None of that avoiding stuff. Stop the car."

The car stopped and Sara hopped out. "Well? Come on."

"This is madness!" someone shouted. "You can't expect us to all get out of the car!"

"We'll come back for it," Sara said calmly.

"Sara!" Taro shouted. "Look out!"

MINUTES LATER

"That was the correct way to escape a lion," Sara said, brushing herself off. "Were these normal conditions, I, and possibly all of you, would be dead." She smiled.

"She's so brave," the same woman from earlier said to Taro. "Do you two know each other?"

"Yes, ma'am," Taro answered.

Haldir rolled his eyes. "Yes. Very brave."

Sara smiled at him evilly. "Now, children, we'll see what fire ants do to human flesh."

"Ha! Shows how much you know! I'm not human!"

Sara just raised an eyebrow. Taro looked at Haldir, horrified. "I thought we weren't-"

Kurama covering his mouth cut him off. "Shh…"

Faythe decided now would be a good time to intervene. "Sara…let me run it for a while."

Sara shrugged and handed over the microphone. "Knock yourself out."

AFRICA…FAYTHE'S WAY

"Let's go look at the antelope again!"

"We've seen the antelope already," a little girl said.

"It was a gazelle, stupid," the boy next to her said.

"Bobby, stop being mean to your sister," their mother scolded.

Faythe smiled at everyone cheerfully. "Well, we're seeing them again."

Behind the group, a herd of gazelle, or antelope, was grazing peacefully without a care in the world.

"The gazelle are, as you can see, quiet animals," Faythe continued.

"Antelope," the little girl muttered.

Faythe smiled. "Or antelope. But we're going to see those next." Faythe continued. "The gazelle are an important fabric in the tapestry of life. Behold! The majesty of nature's doings! Even though the lion eats the gazelle…as Sara showed us…the lion dies, his body decomposes and becomes the grass you see these delicate creatures grazing on now."

Taro wiped a tear from his eye. "That was beautiful."

"Did you understand what she said?" Hiei asked.

"…Some of it."

"Now we're going to see the antelope?" the little girl asked.

"Yes."

The little girl cheered. "Antelopes!"

THE ANTELOPE

"The antelope are quiet creatures. They…"

"A lot of the animals here are quiet!" someone shouted. Faythe ignored him.

"They raise their young in herds. Oh my God! Their young! My kids!"

"They're fine!" Aragorn shouted. "They're asleep!"

Faythe sighed in relief. "Okay. Antelope are herbivores. That means they eat plants."

"Well, duh. Everyone knows that, lady."

Faythe glared at the little boy. "You are beginning to annoy me."

"I can solve that problem," Sara said.

The boy's mother looked at them horrified.

"She was kidding, she was kidding," Haldir assured the lady.

"No, I wasn't," Sara grumbled, glaring at Haldir.

Faythe cleared her throat. "Let's get back to the town, shall we?"