-;-.!\.-;-

Chapter Three: Emotions and Apologies

-;-.!\.-;-

Legolas groaned aloud as he sank down onto the bed of pine needles in the chamber above the fire room. His wounds ached fiercely, but right now he was just too exhausted to even try to treat them. He had dozed off for a few moments earlier in the night, but had woken when the wind had blown the window open. After that he had kept himself busy to avoid the temptation of sleep by bringing up firewood from the store below. Now that the human was awakened and well, he could finally let himself rest.

Speaking of the human… He groaned again and rolled onto his side, shivering in his wet clothes. He hated himself for the way he'd treated the man. He'd had no right, and yet he'd let years of pent-up anger, frustration, and bitterness leak out, if only slightly, towards a curious young human who was nothing like the men who had blinded him so long ago.

And as his chest tightened, he knew he'd hit the mark right on. It was the fact that Strider was a man.

For some reason, he'd been too much of a coward to let the human know that he was blind. He'd deceived him, and although he'd often wondered if he'd be able to pull it off, the man had never suspected his sightlessness. For that he almost felt guilty. And yet, the very thought of anyone else knowing, now, after so long and everything, terrified him.

And most of all, the man was just that: Human.

At one time, he'd never had anything against men. The elves of Mirkwood did business with the wine-makers up in Esgaroth occasionally, and although he found them rough and uncouth, he had yet to see any real harm in their race. Until the battle that had cost both his sight and his mother's life.

It had been men. A man had struck the blow, as he had watched, that had pierced his mother's heart. It had been a man, as he struggled to reach her, that had lashed out with a jagged, poisoned sword, cutting from one temple across his eyes, and slicing all the way to his jaw line. It had been a man that had shattered every piece of his life forever.

His mother's death, his own blinding. The two simultaneous, joined events that played over and over again in his mind, filling every waking moment of every day, all the more vivid because it had been the last thing he had ever seen.

And as he curled into a ball, gripping the worn-out blanket as he fought to hold onto his pain inside in silence, he tried to block out those memories. He groped blindly in the darkness for a shred of something good. Of light, of trees, of birds, of Mirkwood. Of his father. And yet always it returned the image that had seared itself into his mind for life. The one thing he could always see with perfect clarity.

Death.

-;-.!\.-;-

"Roaming through this darkness,

I'm alive but I'm alone

Part of me is fighting this,

But part of me is gone."

-Three Doors Down

-;-.!\.-;-

It was morning. Outside, the storm had found a rhythm, and the snow swirled through the valley in slow, easy cadence. Aragorn had been awake for hours, and truth be told, he was a little worried that he hadn't seen the elf that day. He knew he wasn't highest on the woodland being's like list, but he never would have thought that the elf would simply ignore him now. Aside from that, he really wanted to apologize.

But as of yet, he had no-one to apologize to.

He'd already helped himself to some berries and dried fish, and had even warmed extra in case Legolas was hungry. He definitely wasn't going to mention anything, but the elf was far too thin, even more than was usual for one of the firstborn. But, he supposed, if this was the way Legolas had been living for any amount of time, it was no wonder. Although great care had obviously been taken to preserve every infinitesimal resource the valley had to offer, it was just barely enough to keep a lone human through the winter. Aside from that, even close to the fire the room was chilly, and Aragorn could only imagine how it must feel in the chamber overhead.

There was so much he wanted to know, so many questions he wanted to ask. And yet, he felt that if he posed one more inquiry about anything, the elf would explode. He hadn't been of the best temper the night before, and yet, when he thought back, he hadn't looked very well either.

Ceasing his pacing long enough to glance worriedly up at the closed trapdoor above, the ranger wondered how he'd missed such obvious signs. He was a healer, trained by the wisest herb and lore-master in Middle Earth, and yet his own curiosity had clouded his perception. Legolas had been exhausted, barely able to stand upright, and his answers and curtness of tone were clearly automatic. His tunic had been bloody and torn, and when Aragorn thought back, it struck him that there was a good possibility that Legolas had been wounded by the wolves before he'd rescued him.

He paused, once again looking upwards. If that were true, and he was too tired to treat himself, the elf might be very sick right now, which would be one explanation for his absence.

He should do something, he told himself.

As a healer it was in his nature to wish to heal, but he also felt he owed the elf. So decided, he picked up the torch Legolas had left on the table for him, and lighting it, ascended the ladder.

-;-.!\.-;-

"Legolas?" Aragorn called softly, holding the torch up to illuminate the small quarters. The elf was motionless on the bed, turned onto his side with his back facing the ranger. There was no response. Two wooden brackets hung by the door holding burned-out torches and Aragorn swiftly lit these, extinguishing his own.

"Legolas?" He tried again, a little louder, as he knelt beside the cot. With the light's aid, he now had full view of the elf's lacerated back, the jagged edges and pairing of three slashes confirming his suspicions. The wolf-inflicted wounds were infected.

A wave of guilt washed over him as he reached toward Legolas' neck to feel for a pulse. He should have realized the elf was in pain! It was what he had been trained to do as a healer, and yet he had still been too preoccupied with his own questions to notice. Then again came the question of why the elf had tried to hide it in the first place. Elves were proud creatures by nature, but it was rare for one to go so far as hiding an injury altogether.

He made a quick trip back to the fire room for water and rags, and was glad to find some basic medicinal herbs there as well. Most of them had painkilling properties, and he briefly wondered why Legolas kept them.

Upon his return, Legolas had not moved a muscle. His eyes were lightly shut, a sure sign of illness, and his breathing was slow and uneven.

Sighing once more, the human stripped the elf of his wet tunic and washed the cuts on his back, which were now red with infection and hot to the touch. He cut long strips from the worn cloth he had found in the lowest chamber, and used them to wrap the injury securely. The bite marks on Legolas' leg, however, were less serious. The wolf's teeth had torn deeply into the flesh and ripped muscle, and although it would be painful and slow to heal, Aragorn knew it would be fine eventually.

Tying off the bandage around the elf's calf, Aragorn began to roll the woodland being onto his back for want of a more comfortable position. Without warning, Legolas' eyes snapped open, and with a cry he jerked away, throwing himself backwards as he scrambled away from the human.

"Peace, Legolas!" Aragorn tried to soothe, shocked at this reaction. "It is only I, Strider—"

"No!" Legolas cried out again as Aragorn reached out to him, pressing backwards until his back met the wall behind him. His eyes were glazed and unfocused, his entire body trembling with fever. His bright orbs shone with panic as his back touched the wood and he realized he was trapped.

Aragorn quickly drew back, astonished. The elf had seemed so strong, so sure and resolute. And now… New guilt assailed him. All this time, and the elf had been merely… afraid of him. That explained everything. His curtness, his uncomfortable manner around the human, his hasty departure. It made sense now, leaving the human furious with himself for his own stupidity.

He had felt… threatened.

"I'm so sorry Legolas…" Aragorn whispered to the lightly trembling elf, who still stared at him with grey, unseeing eyes, whirling with veiled memories as if he was caught in some unimaginable nightmare. The human knew it should not have taken this to show him the elf's hidden unease. He should not have to see these raw, open emotions while the creature before him was at his most vulnerable.

Aragorn was torn from his self-condemning tirade as the elf's strength gave out and he slumped forward, the human catching him before he could hit the ground.

Alarmed, instead of laying the elf back down, Aragorn hefted his insubstantial weight over his shoulder and carried him down the rope ladder to the hearth, where the fire was waning. Placing him on the same blanket the elf had given Aragorn to use while he had been unconscious, the man quickly boiled some water in a small pot from his own pack, and using what herbs that had not been soaked by his fall along with the ones he had found among Legolas' food, he quickly prepared a healing brew for when the elf awakened.

Glancing worriedly at the creature's pale face, he again berated himself. If only he hadn't been so stupid! Feeling his forehead, the man was relieved to find that some warmth and color had returned to the elf's body, telling him that it shouldn't take too long before he was awake once more.

-;-.!\.-;-

Although he had no way of knowing it, it was well into the night when Legolas finally came back into awareness.

The sound of roaring flames was close by his ear, and that was just the first of many strange things he sensed around him. Secondly, he was almost warm, a feeling which he couldn't remember having felt for some time. The next was by far the most prominent, and just as unpleasant. His entire body was numb, leaving his mind with a detached, floating sensation. And yet he could still feel pain. His skin was warm but his body was chilled through, and certain parts of him—namely his back and lower left leg—felt to be on fire.

"Legolas?" He started as the human's voice from nearby pulled him from his self-ascertainment. He couldn't repress a cold shudder as he felt the human near him, a hand sliding under his head as a wooden cup was pressed to his lips.

"Legolas, if you can hear me, I need you to try to drink this."

Legolas' heart was pounding furiously. Here he was, too weak to even sit up, and at the mercy of a strange human who he only wished would leave. He never would have admitted it to himself, but the gnawing dread clawing at his heart was more commonly known as fear. And Legolas, Prince of Mirkwood, could never show fear.

"N-no…" He whispered, involuntarily shrinking away from the man's hand. "just… leave me…" He couldn't stop the cruel, sneering faces of the enemy humans from long ago as they flashed before his sightless eyes. He just wanted it to end, all of it.

"No, Legolas, I won't do that. You were hurt by the wolves, and your injuries became infected. You need to drink this."

"Why?" Legolas choked out, cutting off and biting his lip as dizzying waves of pain assaulted his senses. He tried to turn away to hide his grimace, but Strider's firm hand on his shoulder kept him still. Again, he attempted to quash down the nauseating panic building inside of him. He was really, truly helpless. Trapped.

"Legolas. Legolas, look at me." The human commanded quietly when the elf did not at first respond. Against his will, Legolas cracked his eyes open slightly, and moved them towards just above the source of the man's voice, hoping the human wouldn't be able to tell he was blind. The last thing he wanted to do was display one more way in which he was vulnerable.

Aragorn waited until the elf looked him in the eyes. "I wont' hurt you, Legolas." He said sternly. "I would never hurt you, do you understand? I want to be your friend. You don't need to be afraid of me. "

"I'm not afraid of you—" Legolas countered defensively, unconsciously compounding the point. "And you… You don't want to be my friend…"

"Yes, I do, Legolas." The man returned firmly without breaking eye contact.

"You don't know me… You don't know… what I am, you—" Legolas struggled to speak around breaths. Everything was just so hard to do—Even breathing had become a task.

"I know that you have a good heart Legolas." Aragorn spoke softly. "No-one is perfect, and no-one needs to be. You saved my life, and that alone tells me what you really are."

Legolas exhaled heavily without response, head lolling as awareness teetered dangerously. Again, the human cupped the back of Legolas' head and tried to get him to drink.

This time neither the man nor the elf's current situation allowed for argument, and Aragorn was encouraged when he managed to get Legolas to drink most of the cup before he passed out once more.

Setting down the cup and pulling the blankets up around Legolas, Aragorn sadly wondered what had happened to the poor creature that had driven him into seclusion and loneliness for so long, because obviously, the elf had been alone for quite some time. The way he had developed the place that was now his home attested to that, and again, questions barraged his mind. Glancing back at the silent elf, Aragorn stood and cleaned up the slight mess he had made on the table, and then made an extra bowl of the painkilling mixture for when the elf did awaken again.

And that, he hoped, would happen very soon.

-;-.!\.-;-

When Legolas did awaken, it was morning once more and Aragorn had just returned from an exploratory excursion out into the snow, which had ceased sometime in the night.

The elf, now rid of the fever that had plagued him during the night, was feeling humiliated and deeply ashamed of himself for both the way he had treated the human, and the deep emotions he had shown to him in his vulnerability.

Aragorn spread his wet coat out near the constantly blazing fire and sighing, took a seat across from the elf, who had managed to situate himself at the small table.

"I'm sorry."

"What?" Aragorn blinked, having not expected such a remark from a creature who had been deathly ill just the night before.

"I—I was wrong to treat you the way you did. I wasn't thinking clearly." The elf recited quietly.

"No, don't be sorry. We could continue blaming ourselves all day, but I also believe it was mostly my fault. As a guest in your home, I was rude to ask so many questions. In your situation, I would have been impatient with myself as well." He smiled. "But aside from that— Would you like something to eat?"

"And here I was supposed to be the one helping you." Legolas smiled softly as he shifted in his chair. "You don't even know your way around here—"

"I do now." Aragorn grinned as he slid a wooden plate of berries and dried fruit in front of the seated elf. "I took the liberty of acquainting myself with the place, since it seems we may both be stuck here for a while. I hope you don't mind?"

"No, no." Legolas said quietly, absent-mindedly picking at the food as he stared ahead into the fire.

It disturbed Aragorn more than he wanted to admit that the elf would never meet his eyes, although he didn't dare ask why. He didn't want to set back what little friendship might be beginning to form between he and the woodland creature.

"Legolas?" He called softly at length.

The elf glanced briefly towards him.

"I—" Aragorn hesitated when the elven eyes dropped to the plate before him as he picked apart a berry with long, deft fingers. "I meant what I said yesterday… I really do hope to become your friend."

"Strider…" Legolas sighed awkwardly, his voice quieting so much that Aragorn had to lean forward to catch the words. "You—you don't know me. Friendship is weak and faulty at best… a fleeting thing."

"It doesn't have to be." Aragorn countered firmly.

"I—perhaps it's just… I don't know what real friendship is.' He admitted at length, still looking away.

"Then you've truly been missing out on something, Legolas." Aragorn replied seriously. "Had you never a brother, or father?"

The human realized at once that this had been the wrong thing to say as a tangible shadow quickly passed over Legolas' white face. The elf shook his head, swallowing. "No." He whispered, looking quickly down. "No."

Silence prevailed for many long moments, and then, without warning, there came a loud crash from the room below that made them both jump.

Legolas, alarmed, began to stand, but Aragorn quickly stopped him with a hand on his arm. "Speaking of friends," He explained in amusement, "Wait here."

The human departed, leaving the elf in obvious confusion, but after a few more moments of noise from below and selected muffled expletives on the part of the ranger, he reappeared at the hatch.

"Surprise." The man shrugged sheepishly, and a moment later Legolas was again startled as something warm and wriggly was deposited in his lap.

"What is it?" He asked, mystified, as his long hands came up to contain the squirming ball of fur.

"I think it's a "he", actually," Aragorn admitted hesitantly, "and I know it's a wolf."

"A wolf?" Legolas exclaimed in alarm as the pup gave a short whine and struggled to lick at the elf's face.

"Relax!" Aragorn defended himself laughingly. "It was half-frozen when I found it, and I couldn't just leave it out there! Besides—" His eyes sparkled mischievously as he took a seat across the table from the elf. "Wouldn't you have done the same?"

"Well, yes but—" The elf was cut off as the puppy nearly flipped out of his arms and over onto the floor in his antics. "A wolf cub?" He carefully set the energetic puppy down, its legs pumping mid-air in it's enthusiasm to be off. "They—they grow! And then they eat more, including things—and people— that you would rather they not."

"Oh, you're being too serious." Aragorn taunted. "Besides, I can tell that you like him. He likes you."

It was true. Although the furry bundle departed several times to dash headlong around the room as if to assure itself nothing had changed since it's last lap around, always it would return to Legolas' chair, rubbing at the elf's legs as if for reassurance before he set off again.

Legolas sighed in exasperation, but Aragorn did not miss the new light in the elf's eyes and the gentleness with which he patiently handled the tiny wolf cub.

Progress, at last.

-;-.!\.-;-

A gajillion thanks to:

silvertoekee

twilla

Psycho Demon-Witch

Tatie-Valie

silverkonekotsukari

AND:

Aisu Dragoness: Legolas will (of course!) eventually be reunited with Thranduil, but I'm afraid you'll have to stick around a while yet! I don't let my characters off that easily, lol! Thanks for reviewing!

Redleef: You've got it—Legolas is a hermit, and Aragorn a wandering recluse at the moment. ;-) lol Thanks for dropping a line!

Shireling: Thanks again for another fun review! ;-) I'm glad my scenarios were believable—my sister thinks my stories lack variety, since they're usually about one or more lonely heroes, etc., but It's what I do, lol. Also, I find it easy (probably a little too much so) because I feel the same way a lot of the time. I'm usually too deep for people to talk to, so I end up not talking at all, which can wind up being pretty lonely. It's why I love to write. :-) (Uh-oh! That alone was probably too deep, lol!) Still loving your reviews, and hope you stick around!

Setrinan: Hey, who said anything about straying from canon? ;-) No-one knows what Legolas went through before FotR? And who's to argue, especially if I don't keep him blind? Lol (Uh-oh… you're learning all my secrets!) Glad you liked the story so far, and thanks for the review!

MsyticNight: I have you hooked? Wow, I can now hold my head high as an author, Lol! I have officially "hooked" a reader! Thanks, and keep reading!

Legolass Q: I promise, no sad ending! But it's good to know you still would have read it. I know I wouldn't have, lol! I hate sad endings!

It sounds like I know wolves well? Wow, thank you for the compliment! I like to think I know at least a little about them, since they are one of my favorite animals, but I wouldn't call myself an expert. ;-) I do try to study up on anything I write about, or at least shy away from those topics I don't know very well—all for realism's sake, of course.

Agh! You're right, I accidentally signed my last chapter as Skande! Guess I'm a little too use to my other account, lol. Glad you like the tale so far, and thanks for reviewing!

theo darkstar: Wow, you sure are easily amused, Lol! Here's your name again. :-) Does it sound like Legolas can see? I hope not—he does have highly advanced senses aside from sight though, so sometimes it may sound like he knows what's happening a little better then he should. :-) Hope it's not too confusing! Glad you like the story!

Kyra1: Yeap, Aragorn's sure going to live up to his warm-fuzzy-feeling-human reputation and play little-Elrond to everyone's favorite elf! Thanks for reviewing!

Amon-ra1996: Thanks for mentioning it, I did not know the anon. reviews were disabled. That's all fixed now, thanks! So glad you like the story this far! Keep reviewing!

Elflingimp: Did I say he saw Aragorn's face? Whoopsie! I'll have to go back and look for that, thanks for mentioning it! Thanks for the review!

Twilight Shadow: Yep, this whole story is already complete! It takes so long between updates simply because I usually don't have time to respond to all the reviewers, Lol! But I love y'all anyways! And don't worry, you got your message across! Glad you like my writing and the story!

Until next time, everyone! Namaarie!

-Glimpse