Disclaimer: I do not own Yuffie and Godo Kisaragi, Vincent Valentine, AVALANCHE, all characters and concepts related to AVALANCHE, or, in fact, anything that is from Final Fantasy VII (that honour goes to the wonderful bunch at Square-Enix).

Claimer: I DO, however, own the concept of this story and all non-canon concepts seen in this chapter and previous chapters. Feel free to use my ideas and original characters, but please give me credit. If you don't give me credit, Tsen Li will turn into a Gary Stu, ruin your story, and then eat your liver.

And When that Day Comes

Dig my head down deep so I can't hear the cars
Outside on the street, and the stars are laughing
They get a kick out of my misery.
I've tried everything short of Aristotle,
Dramamine, and the whiskey bottle,
I pray for the day when my ship comes in
And I can sleep the sleep of the just again

—Insomniac, Straight No Chaser

Chapter Twelve

The Next Day

—And there were white berries growing on the vines and it was like, oh my Gawd, so AWESOME. Man, you really should have come with us.

I AM THE GREAT NINJA YUFFIE!

—Just because he hanged me from First Face's hand doesn't mean I have to dislike the place! Actually, I kinda see it as a favour. . . Now I won't have to do Penance after Final Confession. I can just do Final Confession and ascend the Pagoda.

HAND OVER YOUR MATERIA AND YOUR GIL.

—oh, shut up, Cloud. Look who's talking about CRAZY. Anyway, did you know that if you jump off First Face's hand and survive. . . ? Any wish you make, (but just one, tee-hee, and no wishes for more wishes, 'cos Da Chao ain't stupid) will come true. Any wish at all. You can wish anything you want.

OH GAWD, AERIS! AERIS!

—I don't know. I don't think anybody's ever done it.

ARE YOU SURE YOU DON'T NEED YOUR MATERIA?

—I don't know that it's true. I think I'm gonna try it someday.

"Cloud."

Cloud woke up from the dream. He blinked, but his eyes were crusted with sleep.

He could vaguely make out a black and red figure.

"Vincent?" He asked.

"Yes."

"Did you get an answer out of her?"

". . . Yes."

Vincent's expression couldn't possibly mean anything good.

"What happened?"

"Too much."

Cloud's brain, having just woken up, was not able to deal with cryptic statements. And even for Vincent, that was a hell of a cryptic statement.

"What do you mean?" He asked, his voice sounding like something that had just crawled out from under a rock for the first time in fifty years. He didn't think there any real way for sludge to physically cover a sound, but if it had been possible, his voice would have been dripping sludge left and right. And not just sludge, either. It'd drip goopy-"I just woke up"-eyeball-gunk, too.

"It means that Yuffie and I were seen together in her bedroom. At night. With no Godo-approved chaperones. This event was naturally misinterpreted."

Cloud blinked. "So, wait. Godo thinks you were about to seduce Yuffie?"

"Something like that, yes."

"That's like. . . child molestation, Vincent. That's—" He couldn't help it. He laughed. In between puffs of laughter, he managed, "Oh god, you are (ha-ha-ha) so not a child molester (hee-hee-hee) it's not even funny (ha-ha-ha-ha)."

"I fear they will close down the city because of my actions."

"Vincent, that's crazy."

"Tsen Li banished me from Wutai. Permanently."

"You're kidding! Good god! And Yuffie let him?"

Vincent sighed. "No, she tried to stop him. There was nothing she could have done."

"Nothing she could do?"

Yuffie, helpless? That was weird. It was actually a disturbing thought. Part of him had recoiled at seeing her suspended from Da Chao precisely because he had never thought of her as helpless.

Of course, another part of him had smirked and said, Glad she's got what's coming to her.

"Technically, by being in such a position, I ruined her reputation. Her father had every right to demand reparation. Not even Yuffie could override it."

"That stinks."

"I suppose." He paused. "Cloud, if Yuffie were to approach you about a business deal, you wouldn't say no immediately, would you?"

"What kind of business deal are we talking, here?"

What an odd question for Vincent to ask. Since when did Vincent care about business? Or ask questions he deemed personal?

"Human advertising."

Human advertising? What the hell was happening now? Cloud repressed a sigh. Vincent was usually cryptic without trying to be, but this was just too cryptic too early in the morning.

"Well, what would I be advertising?"

But Vincent shook his head. "Say she didn't tell you immediately. Would you say no immediately?"

"Well, no. Of course not. If Yuffie wanted me to advertise something, it'd probably be okay."

Vincent's crinkled a little. That was the first sign of a smile. "No, it would be more than okay, Cloud. Years ago, before the Wutai-Shinra War, northern Wutai was famous for a process called materia beading. When Shinra defeated Wutai, they confiscated all of Wutai's materia."

"Materia beading? Is that like using materia as beads?"

Vincent shook his head. "I don't know. I'm not north Wutaian, so I don't know the process and nobody would tell me. The end result, however, is turning materia into tiny beads. Perhaps each bead truly is a fully-formed Materia. Again, not being from north Wutai, I cannot say."

"So, basically, it's beads. That are materia. Or the other way around. What's it good for?"

"Many, many things. Yuffie showed me a bangle made entirely out of materia. It survived a Fire3 attack from Sephiroth with no damage."

Whoah. Cloud blinked. "Heh, you're kidding, right? She'd want me to use this stuff?"

"You and the rest of AVALANCHE."

Cloud grinned. "Vincent, if this stuff is as powerful as you say it is, I can't wait to get my hands on it. I'd take her up on that offer in a heartbeat!"