Hey, I just realised I haven't done any disclaimers for this story! Or maybe I have. I don't remember. Anyways:

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, but Naruto owns a rubber spatula.

By the way, I have sooo many hits for this story, but sadly I only have one review. That does a lot to my self-esteem, you know.

Also by the way, I forgot all about this story for a very long time. I haven't edited it for how many months? No wonder no one reviews. Or maybe that's just because the story is dumb. Well, that was the point.

Naruto ran outside and saw Sakura. "Sakura-chaaan!" He sang. She looked at him with a scowl.

"What," she grumped. She still wanted French toast.

"I am invincible!" He informed her.

"Really."

"Yes, I tried to kill myself but I couldn't! I'm invincible! Now I have to go find Sasuke and beat him up!"

"NO!" screeched Sakura, and attacked Naruto, clawing his face. She had forgotten already that Sasuke was a jerk. (But she'd remember in a few more years.) Naruto started to bleed and cry.

"Why am I bleeding? I'm supposed to be invincible!" he sobbed, running away.

By the time the cuts on Naruto's face had scabbed over, he had calmed down and decided he'd imagined the whole thing. So he went over to Sasuke's house.

"Sasuke," he called, slamming the door open.

"What?" asked Sasuke from the other room.

"I'm going to beat you up! I'm invincible! Prepare to die!" Naruto ran into Sasuke's room and saw Sasuke playing with a wind-up chicken. Sasuke looked up.

"Don't kill me, I just got this chicken! Look, isn't it cute? You wind it up and then it goes across the floor and pecks and makes funny noises!" said Sasuke enthusiastically. Naruto looked at him like he'd grown another ear.

"Hey, you've grown another ear!" said Naruto.

"Yes, I know," sighed Sasuke, fingering the ear on the top of his head. All of a sudden, a cat jumped in through the window, and ate Sasuke's wind-up chicken. A gear dropped out of its mouth.

"NOOOOO!" Shrieked Sasuke supremely girlishly. "He ate Doffles!"

"Doffles?" asked Naruto in disgust. He looked at Sasuke like he'd grown another ear.

"Hey, you've grown another ear!" said Naruto. Sasuke sighed.

Sometimes I scare myself.