Disclaimer: I do not own Yuffie and Godo Kisaragi, Vincent Valentine, AVALANCHE, all characters and concepts related to AVALANCHE, or, in fact, anything that is from Final Fantasy VII (that honour goes to the wonderful bunch at Square-Enix).
Claimer: I DO, however, own the concept of this story and all non-canon concepts seen in this chapter and previous chapters. Feel free to use my ideas and original characters, but please give me credit. If you don't give me credit, Tsen Li will turn into a Gary Stu, ruin your story, and then eat your liver.
And When that Day Comes
Dig my head down deep so I can't hear the cars
Outside on the street, and the stars are laughing
They get a kick out of my misery.
I've tried everything short of Aristotle,
Dramamine, and the whiskey bottle,
I pray for the day when my ship comes in
And I can sleep the sleep of the just again
—Insomniac, Straight No Chaser
Chapter Sixteen
City of Wutai --- Yuffie's House
As Godo had said, he was waiting in Yuffie's basement.
Vincent didn't bother trying to avoid whatever issue Godo had with him. Godo, like Yuffie, was so adept at dancing around the point of something that he could easily recognise attempts at evasion. And, unlike Yuffie, Godo had learned that letting things slide doesn't always work to your advantage.
"If you wanted to speak with me," Vincent told him. "Speak."
Godo looked at him for a long time. Neither of them moved.
"Valentine, I need to know why. What is your fixation with my daughter? Why do you look at her the way you do? How did you know to save her?"
Fixation? The way I look at her? Am I fixated on Yuffie Kisaragi? No. I'm a monster. . . My only fixation is Lucrecia. I deserve to love a dead woman, and a dead woman alone.
The world began to sway around him, a sure sign that Chaos was about to speak. No, not speak. Force him to dream.
His eyes closed and he found himself in the usual sea of darkness, a prelude to whatever nightmare vision Chaos wanted to show him.
And then the vision started. Chaos had no words humans could hear or understand, so he communicated with Vincent via images and emotions.
An endless stone hallway. The cries of an infant echo in a fevered pitch down the hallway. The stones in the walls form the words
THOU SHALT NOT FAIL
The altar to Da Chao. Someone has desecrated it. In human blood, someone has written
THOU SHALT NOT SUCCEED
A great wood building. Everywhere he looks, he sees wood painted red. And then the colour bleeds out. The walls, now grey, begin to splinter. Timber goes flying. Tapestries follow the walls.
Through the walls that are not there, he can see the great funnel storm rove in from the sea. The clouds above him read
THOU SHALT NOT DESTROY
His third uncle's wedding ceremony. The bride wears a lovely pink kimono, but she has no face. No one in the crowd that surrounds him has a face. Their clothes begin to rot, and so does their flesh.
Maggots writhe in and out of his hands. They write a letter in their passage
THOU SHALT NOT DEFEND
Lucrecia, lovely Lucrecia, whom he loved, and loves and will always love, lies rotting in Wutai's cemetery.
Her face is not contorted in agony. She does not reach out with pleading hands. She watches with a placid smile and decomposing eyes, one bloated hand to the doubly bloated stomach. Her left hand drifts at the top of the tank.
A fish with Hojo's face eats her toes.
He sees the last words written of nothing, on nothing. They merely flash into his mind.
BUT THOU WILT DO ALL OF THESE THINGS, BECAUSE I AM NOT GOD.
"Vincent?"
Vincent opened his eyes. "My apologies, Lord Godo. I am afraid I cannot explain myself at this time."
You never make sense, but this is ridiculous. I don't understand you at all.
But Chaos did not answer.
"If you are in love with my daughter, then you should know that you're far too late."
"Lord Godo, I am not a man capable of love. I lost the ability to love long ago. From what I remember of it, though, love is nothing like riding a bicycle. Once gone, this is not an ability that will return."
"Of course it isn't like riding a bicycle, you fool. You can forget how to ride a bicycle. You don't forget how to fall in love. How can it return to you, if it's never been gone?"
"Kisaragi, do not presume to tell me of what I am or am not capable. I would know better than you. You do not speak to a man. You speak to a monster. Are monsters capable of love? They are not."
"Then you saved my daughter out of selfish reasons?"
"I did."
"And what were those selfish reasons, Vincent Valentine?"
He had saved her because. . . Because. . .
Because he had made a vow? But that couldn't be the only reason. He was sure that wasn't the only reason. And technically, doing something because you said you'd do it is not a selfish act.
Vincent didn't answer.
"I thought so. You don't know why you saved her, do you? You know only that you had to act. And tell me, Vincent Valentine, in those moments, what did you fear?"
Godo Kisaragi watched him with narrowed eyes, a calculating expression on his face.
"That Yuffie would die."
Thou shalt not fail. Thou shalt not succeed. But thou wilt do all of these things, because I am not God.
"You did not fear for yourself? You did not fear that she would be insane, or that this was a dream, or that you were going to die?"
"I have no fear of death. I seem to be incapable of it. None of the other options occurred to me."
"Liar."
Thou shalt not destroy. Thou shalt not defend. But thou wilt do all of these things, because I am not God.
Vincent said nothing.
Godo was silent for a while. But then he sighed, and said, "Vincent, be careful. Your uncle may seem happy to see you, but he is not the man you knew."
"He has not been my uncle for a long time."
"Just be careful. Yuffie values you. I think that whether you are here or you are gone, you will always be as much her right hand as Sho Tzu."
That should not have comforted him.
So why did it?
(Hr)
City of Wutai –-- Chekhov's House
Sometime after nightfall
Yuffie couldn't sit still. It was one of her eternal failings. When she had to sit still, she vibrated. Not literally, of course. But she would jiggle one knee, or she'd fidget. Generally, she bounced in her seat.
You do not bounce in your seat while you are in a futon. This is one of the basic facts of life. Sane people— and even the ones who could only distantly be connected with the word sane— tend to avoid bouncing while sitting on a futon the way they avoid spraying milk out of their noses.
So Yuffie eventually gave up on trying to follow Sho Tzu's suggestion (it had to be a suggestion, because the Second's employee does not give the Second an order) to stay in bed. If she stayed in bed, she was going to go crazy. Well, no. She was already crazy. But she would get crazier, and Yuffie had deemed herself crazy enough that if she got any crazier, she would be certifiably insane and drooling and foaming at the mouth and convinced that there was another person who looked exactly like her who was trying to ruin her life.
Instead of sitting in bed and meditating, Yuffie went through a countdown of her thirty-five all time favourite ninjutsu moves. And as she did this, she mused on the fact that she was alive. The fact that she was alive meant that Da Chao had seen her as worthy.
Or maybe she wasn't worthy, and Da Chao had decided to make her worthy.
In any case, her wish was coming true. It wasn't her dearest wish, or the wish she'd been wishing from her girlhood. Her dearest wish was a personal wish, a selfish wish, and Yuffie had realized, when Tsen Li had told her his wish, that personal isn't always important. She had realized that the Right Thing, in this case specifically but probably in most cases, usually consisted of sacrifice, and that the answer that pleased only her was not the answer.
It hadn't been an epiphany. She had been sacrificing for Wutai from the age of twelve. She could have killed the entire House of Shu, and effectively solved the problem, but she hadn't. She had chosen to sacrifice, even if only to save her pride. Obviously, she had grasped the concept at least vaguely.
It had been more the acknowledgment of a subconscious process. Like when you keep having nightmares about that physical training test until you finally realize, hey, I'm having nightmares about this, maybe I should go, you know, train, or something.
It had also been an acknowledgment that Tsen Li was a totally rotten bastard and she didn't want to be anything like him. Because he was a selfish condescending jerkface and it would be really hard to look in the mirror and not want to kill herself if she turned into a selfish condescending jerkface.
She was on her fourth rotation of Yuffie's All Time Favourite Ninjutsu Move Count Down (specifically, move number seventeen) when Vincent slid open the shoji door.
"Hey, Vinnie!" She said, not bothering to pause. If she worked quickly enough, she might be able count down to move number eleven before Vincent scolded her for being out of bed.
Move seventeen into sixteen into fifteen. . .
"What did the old man have to say?"
". . . "
Move fifteen into move fourteen into move thirteen into move twelve. . .
"You should be in bed."
She stopped, swearing. "I nearly got to move eleven, Vinnie! Did you have to ruin my fun? It's not like I'm hurt or anything. . . "
"You jumped off Da Chao. Your mental health bears watching."
"Says the guy who locked himself in a coffin for thirty years."
"Yuffie."
"Fine, fine. I'm getting into bed. Now tell me what the old man said!"
"He told me to be careful, and to make sure my intentions remained honourable."
Remained honourable? Like Vincent could have intentions towards her that weren't honourable?
Yuffie dropped back onto the futon. She pulled the ribbon out of her hair. "Well, there's a moot warning. Like you're going to have intentions towards me that aren't honourable."
Vincent raised an eyebrow. And she could actually see him raising his eyebrow, because he wasn't wearing the headband anymore.
"Don't give me that look! You're not attracted to me, and you damn well know it. I mean, how could you be? I'm not pretty."
And it was true. She really didn't have that much going for her, did she? A plain face, scrawny legs, and a bust that wasn't much to speak of. She was. . . Just your average Wutaian girl, really, when it came to looks. Her hair was kind of pretty, but it was nothing special.
Vincent's eyebrow went up a little higher, but he didn't say anything. He just looked at her with this totally sceptical expression, like he wanted to say, oh really? but just wasn't sarcastic enough.
Finally, the eyebrow dropped. He took a step towards her. "Who told you that?"
"I didn't need anybody to tell me that, Vincent. I figured that out for myself. I mean, look at me!"
"I see you."
"See? Can you honestly say that I'm pretty?"
He looked at her for a long time. Not one of those looks where he was trying to see if she met his standards. He wasn't inspecting her. Just looking at her, like she was the most interesting thing in the room to look at while he made up his mind about something.
"Yes."
"But you had to think about it, didn't you?"
"No."
"Don't lie to me."
"I didn't have to think about whether or not you were attractive, Yuffie. I had to think about whether or not admitting so was appropriate."
"Oh." And then she did what she always did. She recovered. "Well, I still think the warning was a moot one."
The corners of his eyes crinkled. He was smiling at her. He crossed the room. "Really."
"Really-really, Vinnie." She put on a chipper voice.
"Are you calling me a liar?" His voice was. . . No, it sounded the same. That was what she noticed about it. It sounded the same. Generally, when Vincent was accused of being a liar, he would sound angry.
But no, he didn't sound angry, not angry at all.
Yuffie blinked. "Uh, well, wait, what?"
He shook his head and oozed a three-beat silence.
He's gotta count that out in his head, she thought. Gotta.
"Yuffie. . . No, never mind. We should move on."
"Should we?" She looked up at him, made sure to make eye contact. "Why is that?"
"Yuffie."
"No. Vincent, do you know how often people call me pretty? Can you guess?"
He didn't say anything.
"How about never? Does never sound good to you? Cos 'never' is the right answer."
He took another step. "Find another topic."
"Fine. Do you mind opening that dresser over there? Top drawer." She pointed. "I'd do it, but I'm not supposed to get out of bed."
He went over to the dresser and opened the top drawer.
"Okay, if I remember right, there should be a box wrapped in dark green cloth."
He pulled out a box. "This one?"
Yuffie blinked. "Vincent, are you colour blind? That's dark blue. But you can keep it out, 'cos that one's for Cloud."
"Is it?"
"Yeah, Vincent. Most people learn their colours when they're really young, you know. I said the dark green one. It should be in the far left corner."
How. . . odd. Vincent had never really made a mistake quite like that before. So far as she'd always seen, Vincent had almost no weaknesses. Of course, one's ability to tell colour decreased in dim lighting, and it was night.
But still.
Vincent found the box on the next try. He brought it over to her, dropping to one knee so she didn't have to crane her neck to see him.
She took the box from him, unwrapped the dark green cloth. It slid into her lap to reveal carved mahogany. Her fingers trembled as she pulled the lid up.
As she had thought it would be, it was beautiful. All dark green beads, linked together with tiny white beads. . . It produced its own light.
"This one's for you." She placed the tip of her index finger on a bead, and began to name the materia.
"I cannot accept such a gift, Yuffie."
He was giving her such a serious look— kind of sexy, actually— and watching her with eyes that had to have just about all of his soul poured in them. The look tugged at her so well that she wondered if he practiced this one, too. The way he practiced his glares and had probably practiced his smiles.
And holy fucking hell their faces were way too close.
"Don't give me that! It's total bullshit. You're my friend, and I want you to have it. I know men don't normally wear necklaces, but it's not like the damn thing's girly or anything."
"Yuffie, it is—"
"Just take it, Vinnie. You're going to be the one to give AVALANCHE their stuff, cos I can't let them in until after the wedding, and I want them to have it frigging yesterday."
And with that, the discussion ended. She took the necklace from the box and slipped it around his neck.
Leviathan above and below, they were so close. So close, and he was sexy as hell— why had she never noticed that before? Just as she'd wanted to run her fingers through his hair, she wanted to kiss him.
She wanted it badly.
Bad idea bad idea bad idea. This is a bad idea if I've ever had a bad idea. But man it would just be a kiss, and they already think we kissed anyway and I hate Tsen Li and nothing would happen so what harm could it do. But ohmygawd I'll ruin my reputation—
And by the time she was trying to put on the brakes, she had already slipped one hand to his right shoulder and was leaning up, stretching just a little, her lips grazing his. . .
He didn't even bother pulling away. No, he kissed her back, and she kissed him back, and oh my GAWD I am kissing Vincent Valentine and it feels sogood.
She opened her mouth a little, scraped her teeth against his lips, and then his mouth was open, too, and she was pushing her tongue into him, and his tongue was finding hers, too and he tasted like tea and day-old sake and maybe even a little smoke.
His right arm wrapped around her, and she threw her right arm around him, and they were pulling closer to each other, her tongue trying to worm its way down to his spleen.
And then they heard the cough.
Yuffie looked past Vincent. There, in the door she hadn't heard slide open, stood Sho Tzu, with an irate looking Tsen Li towering behind him.
Oh fuck.