Chapter 2

Sonic's babysitter

Sonic and the rest of the gang were still on the football field. A guy came up. He had a big mustache, and two bags of money. He moved every time a Giant pair of dice moved. He walked up to Knuckles, and looked at him.

"What's your name, little one?" The man asked.

"POOP!" baby Knuckles replied.

"Well then, poop, where to u live?" The man said.

"Me go potty!" Knuckles said.

"So your name is poop, and you live in the potty." The man said.

"Me hungry." Sonic said.

"Here's a million dollars." Uncle Moneybags replied. Sonic took off at super speed, Crashing headfirst into Big the cat. He was still young. He was so stupid, age came slower for him.

"You tubby." Sonic said happily.

"You're little Sonic. Did you watch Honey I shrunk the kids again?" Big said stupidly.

"You fuzzy." Sonic replied, feeling his fur.

"Whoa did you get hit over the head?" Big replied, pushing Sonic away from his Giant fat rolls. The pair of dice hit Big in the stomach, and hit the moon. The moon exploded, And meteors shot at the planet. Big farted, shooting himself into the sky. His stomach shot the meteors away from him, hitting Knuckles.

"Oh my god, they killed Knuckles!" Tails yelled. Knuckles started burning to death. Shadow pulled out the popgun and shot Knuckles again and again. Rouge flew around and around until she got dizzy and crashed into Tails. He ran into Knuckles burning body. Tails crashed into Omega, short circuiting him. Omega accidentally shot Big, but the bullet bounced off of him and hit chili dogs stand. Baby Sonic ran around cheering as chili dogs rained from the sky. One hit him in the eye, temporarily binding him. He fell down on his little diapered butt, but the magic powers of Huggies saved him. A three ply cushion absorbed the shock, along with the layer of poo he made from the excitement of raining hotdogs. Big landed on the meteor, putting out the fire on Knuckles. Unfortunately, Big was so fat that he smothered Knuckles.

"Oh my god, YOU killed Knuckles!" Tails yelled. Rouge, who had just woken up from falling on the ground, flew headlong into Big's stomach. She flew off into the distance, propelling a couple of stars into each other. The stars flew into Knuckles.

"Oh my god, The stars killed Knuckles!" Tails yelled. Amy, mad because I hadn't added her that much, Swung her Mallet. It was tiny and made of plastic, though. It squeaked as it flew up towards me. (I'm referring to myself as a higher being.) She ran around with her fist in the air, only to be hit by the mallet I shot back at super speed. She saw little stars and birdies. Tails, still shocked from the loss of Knuckles, stumbled around sadly. He looked at Big, who had just gotten off of Knuckles' body.

"You did this, you naughty boy! BONZAI!" Tails yelled, pulling out a bunch of GI Joe weapons. They were real however, and Big ran for his life as bullets went flying at him. He fell down. The bullets shot over him. Shadow, always knowing when to come in, flew at Big's side with his 3-wheeler. He hit Big's side, and Big flew down the hill he was atop of. He rolled at great speeds towards Sonic, who was still enjoying the chilidog rain. He held his tongue out, hoping to catch a chilidog on one. Big came rolling, causing chilidog's everywhere to shake towards the hill. Sonic caught a chilidog, and stuck three in his diaper where they wouldn't get stuff on them. He turned just in time to see Big rolling towards him. Sonic ran, and looked like Indiana Jones running from that giant boulder. All of a sudden, a pair of dice landed between Baby Sonic and big Big. Uncle Moneybags came running at Sonic. He scooped up the midget, and waited for the dice to roll again. They rolled, and he landed on Jail. Two policemen came and arrested him.

"What did I do?" Moneybags asked.

"We assume child molestation." The police officers said, noticing the number of babies surrounding him. Moneybags threw Bags of money at them, and took off running. Police aimed guns and fired. Most missed, so Shadow and Tails helped out. Tails gave one officer all of the guns to one, while Shadow gave his 3-wheel to the other. One took off on the 3-wheel, which I hope you never see, while the other fired billions of sweet guns.

"Me miss chilidog." Sonic said grumpily. Then one fell out of his diaper. Smiling, he took the chilidog and looked at it.

"Me call you Billy!" He said to Billy the chili. He stuffed Billy into his mouth, smiling still.

"Me miss Billy." Sonic said grumpily.

Another Chilidog fell out of his diaper.

"Me not going there again." Sonic said, putting it back. The chilidog fairy came flying out of the sky.

"Knuckles says hi." The fairy said. The fairy threw a billion chilidogs at Sonic, and flew away.

"That weird." Sonic said. He tucked the Chilidogs away, and moved on. Amy ran up to Sonic.

"You're funny! I like you." Amy shrilled.

"You scary. Want chilidog?" Sonic said. He threw a billion chilidogs at Amy. Crushing her. While she was down, Sonic took about a million dogs and ran off. The police came running by, knocking All of Sonic's chilidogs out of his hands. He got mad and snapped the first one's neck. He did a slow-motion flip, dodging like 100 bullets. He kicked The cop in the bad place and jumped through the air, landing on his face. He went crazy, scratching and clawing the cop's face. He pulled away the guns, and melted them together, forming a wagon with rockets.

"Tails have weird guns." Sonic said. The wagon was just big enough to fit the chilidogs. He tied the Wagon to Shadow's 3-wheel, and took off. Uncle Moneybags was hiding in the bushes. The dice flew, crushing the wagon. Sonic turned back slowly, pretending he hadn't just heard it. The wagon was crushed, and a pile of chili resembled a pool of blood.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Sonic yelled. He cried, trying to dig a dog or two out.

"BILLY!" Sonic yelled. There was a single chilidog unharmed amongst the pile. He picked it up, and stored it carefully in his diaper. Big just recovered from the hillside encounter, and ran away.

"YOU GUYS ARE FREAKS!" Big yelled, running as fast as his fat butt would carry him.

"Bye tubby fuzzy buddy!" Sonic yelled. Then Amy came out of the pile, and rouge shot to Earth. She hit Big while he was running, and landed on Uncle Moneybags. He died, leaving a bag of money to the gang. They caught a taxi, and returned to their apartments.