A/N (Super Ceech) Heya, everybody! Wow, what a fast update! Look at me go! Enjoy the wonders of Sesshoumaru/Sango!
"WIND SCAR!" Inuyasha shouted as he brought down his transformed Tetsusaiga and felt it slice through the air, creating a massive energy blast aimed at the enemy. In this case, the enemy was an enormous hawk demon and the battle would have already been over, Inuyasha lamented in irritated tones, if the frickin' thing would stop flying out of the way of his Wind Scar. As it was in the process of doing now.
"Dammit!" Inuyasha cursed as the demon flew easily and tauntingly out of the way.
"I've got him, Inuyasha!" Sango cried as she wound up to chuck her giant boomerang. "HIRAIKOTSU!" Sango watched proudly as her boomerang seemed to be right on the mark. "Yeah! Take that, you overgrown bird!" Just as a smug expression was stealing itself across her face, the hawk demon drew back a talon and effectively kicked the boomerang aside; it flew wildly away and flew out of sight, into a distant forest.
As Sango stood gaping at her lost weapon, she was taken off guard by the demon who decided to take advantage of her distraction. As it swooped down at her, she turned wide eyes to it, knowing there was no escape...
"Sango!" She felt a hard jolt in her side and suddenly she was being thrown aside, out of the demon's path, with a heavy weight on top of her. When the motion had stopped, she blinked up in surprise into Miroku's concerned eyes.
Some may have seen the concern and been touched – he had been worried about her, he had put his own life at risk to rescue her, he did it because he loved her... But all Sango saw was that his concern was just another way of saying that he pitied her, that he thought she couldn't take care of herself, that he looked at her as nothing more than a pitiful annoying creature that always needed to be saved.
And then...and THEN he GROPED her. Right there, right then! As Sango felt his hand's caress on her bottom, she seethed. Not only did he think she was useless and something to be pitied, but he also regarded her as some sort of sex object – something he could just play with any time he wanted, with no repercussions. And when she did give him repercussions, he just took them – as if her strength meant nothing at all – and ignored them in order to grope her again another time!
Sango shoved the sex-driven, hormonal, dastardly devious, perverted and insensitive jerk-wad off of her in time to see Kagome shoot an arrow at the demon that invariably missed. "She's so useless..." Sango muttered. "And so is that pointless little fox retard..."
As Sango stood up, dusting Miroku cooties off of herself, Inuyasha made a mighty leap and finally managed to slice the hawk demon in two. Sango gaped and shouted, "Th-that was my kill! How dare he!"
The others looked over at her strangely. "Gee, calm down, Sango," Inuyasha said gently. "We're all in this together. Besides, this little bugger wasn't even worth your time."
"Oh, but I suppose it was somehow worth the Great Inuyasha's time?" Sango retorted and scoffed. "Oh, please! Don't you dare try to humour me! I see this for exactly what it is! You think I can't do anything on my own, you think you're better than me and that I'd be dead fifty times over if you weren't here to do my job for me!"
"Whoa, Sango, chill," Inuyasha cut in, holding up a hand in a placating gesture. "We don't mean any of that. You're a valued member of the team. You kill many of the demons we come across and you save us a hell of a lot more than we save you. We highly respect you."
Sango still looked furious, but she looked a bit panicked at the same time, as if she were grasping for an argument that was quickly slipping through her fingers. "Oh, yeah? Well, I think that you...! That you think that I...! That we–and–but–I NEED TO GO LOOK FOR HIRAIKOTSU NOW! DON'T EVEN THINK OF FOLLOWING ME!"
With that, she stomped off angrily in the direction in the woods that they'd seen her weapon fall into, Kirara trailing after her. The others watched them go with slightly frightened expressions.
"Wouldn't dream of it..." Miroku spoke up shakily.
..:V:..
"Where did that blasted thing get to...?" Sango muttered to herself in frustration. She had sworn she had covered the entire woods and yet there had been no sign of her beloved boomerang. She simply had to find it. Not for any particular sentimental reason, but there's was a nice little secret compartment in one of its tips where she liked to keep her special herbs...uh, for poison. Yeah, for poison. –cough–
"I can't lose this batch..." she murmured, disconcerted. "Kikyo gave me the package deal for such a good price, and this bit is the last I've got..."
Sango flopped dejectedly on a random boulder, Kirara small and coiled in her lap. "I'm so forlorn," she sighed forlornly. "Nobody in the group seems to appreciate me and now I've gone and lost my favourite weapon and special herbs... Life sucks. Every unfortunate event is like a dagger in my heart. I wish I could feel nothing at all...!"
"Did someone say something about feeling nothing at all?" a monotone voice broke through her reverie. Starting, Sango spun around and stood up to come face to face with...
"Sesshoumaru? What are you doing her–my Hiraikotsu!" For yes, Hiraikotsu was in Sesshoumaru's possession. In fact, it was tightly lodged in the depths of his fluffy.
"Oh, is this yours?" Sesshoumaru questioned, raising a finely shaped eyebrow and the intruding object. "It came out of the sky and got stuck in my fluffy and I've been too lazy to pry it out."
"Hiraikotsu!" Sango shouted as if finding her lost puppy. She rushed over to the tall dog demon and quickly prised it out of the fluff, which just bounced up and filled the space as if nothing had ever been there. After cradling her boomerang for several minutes while Sesshoumaru looked on disinterestedly, Sango finally looked up and around. "Hey, where's Jaken and that little girl that follows you around?"
"I told them to count the number of grass blades in some meadow a ways back..." Sesshoumaru responded.
"Why?"
Sesshoumaru gave a slight shrug. "Seemed like a good idea at the time. And I ran out of rocks to throw at Jaken."
"Ah..." Sango trailed off. After a moment of awkward silence, she blurted, "Hey, you said something about me saying something about feeling nothing at all?"
Sesshoumaru brought up a hand and stroked his fluffy – Sango assumed it was the equivalent of anyone else stroking their chin. "Yes...I myself have ridded myself of most emotions. Life's much easier that way."
Sango looked at him eagerly. "Oh, you simply must teach me!"
Sesshoumaru shot her an irritated look. "That right there was way too much enthusiasm. Get out of my sight."
Sango coughed and schooled her expression into the most nonchalant one she could muster. "No...please give me another chance..." she said flatly.
Sesshoumaru regarded her once more. "Perhaps... You wish to know the secret art of ridding yourself of feelings then?"
Sango tried hard not to nod her head too eagerly.
"Fine then..." Sesshoumaru sniffed. "All you must do is gather all your emotions, pack them in a tight little ball and then shove it down into the pit of your stomach. If this causes discomfort, shove it down Jaken's stomach instead. Through physical force, if need be."
Sango's face lit up as realization came to her. "You minimize your emotions as much as possible and then take out any that remain on Jaken! That's brilliant! So now I just need a creature to take out my emotions on..." Sango glanced around and then her eyes lit evilly upon Kirara, who shrank back slightly in fear.
"No, no, not the cat demon – too strong and too much of a challenge when she's transformed. I recommend Jaken. He is slovenly and pathetic and, like a punching bag, keeps swinging back for more," Sesshoumaru said. "I suppose I would be willing to share. Even if it is with a mere human."
"Isn't that little girl who follows you around human?" Sango inquired.
Sesshoumaru's eyes grew shifty. "Quiet you... I gave you no leave to speak. You should be attempting to suppress your emotions."
"Oh, right!" Sango responded, quickly engrossing herself in the task.
"Oh...and never forget that severe laziness lends wonders to the cause," Sesshoumaru added.
"Gotcha," Sango acknowledged, sitting back down on her boulder.
After nearly two hours of Sango concentrating hard, and Sesshoumaru staring despondently at her, Sango finally stood once more and faced him.
"Alright, Sesshoumaru," she said in a flat, emotionless tone. "I think I've got it."
"It appears so," the silver-haired man responded, though he couldn't help but feel something was off.
"Do you know what though?" Sango asked in a monotone voice. "I think that through this experience, I've been able to suppress all emotions but one. You've taught me so much, and now I feel...I feel that I love you." Not once did her voice stray from the decibel level she started at.
Finally, Sesshoumaru was able to pinpoint what seemed so unnerving about the girl. Ignoring everything she had just said, in fact it was a mystery if he had heard any of it at all, he gave her a look that plainly showed he was disturbed. "Gah...you're way too much like that should-be-illegal Kikyo woman now... I think I would like to depart from your presence now," he said in a clipped tone.
With that, Sesshoumaru promptly ran away – well, walked away at a stately pace. He was doing a fine job at looking supremely aloof – that is, until he suddenly tripped on his shoelaces and stumbled a few steps. After he had quickly straightened himself and pretended like nothing had happened, he glanced down at his feet...only to freeze and gape at them.
"M-m-m-my shoelaces! They're...they're undone! I...I can get laid now! Th-this is incredible!" Ecstatic and forgetting all about schooling his emotions, Sesshoumaru looked around eagerly for someone to make his dream come true.
Sango was the only woman in sight – still gaping at him in astonishment. All reservations about her similarity to Kikyo forgotten, Sesshoumaru bounded over to her. "You are my new love! Come with me, and we shall consummate our...our...! Why does there need to be an occasion to consummate? There doesn't! I am Sesshoumaru and I have decreed it thus! Now come!"
Sango gave him a wry look. "Aren't you supposed to be emotionless?"
Before Sesshoumaru had the chance to respond, Jaken came bounding towards them. "Master Sesshoumaru! Master Sesshoumaru! I have completed the task – there is exactly two million, five hundred and thirty-six thousand, nine hundred and seve–" With two swift swings, Sesshoumaru and Sango had both pounded Jaken into oblivion.
Sesshoumaru stood up straight and adjusted the collar folds of his kimono slightly. "Ah...that's better," he said in a once more flat voice.
Sango rolled her shoulders and cracked her neck to both sides. "Wow...letting out your emotions on Jaken really does work. I feel loads less emotional. I'll gladly go with you now."
"Then let us go. Let us go like no one has ever gone before," Sesshoumaru said.
And so, together, the two new love birds happily – er, slightly contentedly – skipped merrily – well, walked at a steady pace – into the beautiful, breath-taking sunset – uh, it was alright...kinda generic, really. Sesshoumaru just needed to resolve one last little, niggling matter...
"What's your name anyway...?"
A/N (Super Ceech) Catch ya next time – look for the next update next weekend!