C26: Right, I may already be out of ideas after the first word but in this chapter you will see me insulting rap music (I wouldn't even pay 50 cents for it) ba doom boom chi! Crap pun I know but then again, I listen to metal. I have spoon stapled to my ear right now (ba doom boom chi!) AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! THE PUNS ARE COMING!

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How to get a Dalek to lay an egg & 33 other things to do with one, 28 of which are impossible even if you had an actual Dalek

Part three: The stuff that could have been fun if it wasn't so crap

Activity thirteen: (This one involves the numbers 666, 667, and 7, the master, PUNS! And playdough)

Funnily enough this does actually centre around playdough (OH MY GOD! HE DECIDED NOT TO LIE TO US! - my fictional readers) ……………..Just kidding.

In this activity I will be torturing queer people who think that Little Britain is still funny (I laugh at Matt Lucas and his hilariously bald head!) Tom Baker deserves better.

Now then, where was I? Ah yes, you will require the following things that should have died ages ago: Lost the TV show (Criticise me! OH I'M SO SCARED! IT'S SOOO BORING!), now, really, you will require: The Master's head, Davros, George bush, biscuits (Ideally hobnobs), a cup of tea, some crap songs (anything by Beyonce will do, and I don't care if I spelt it wrong, bloody paperclip) cheese, a sponge and some giant (CENSORED) up space spiders fro metebilis 3, oh yeah, your dalek.

Right, what was I writing again? Oh that's right, the last chapter of George Bush's autobiography.

And so next month I will invade Iran, they must have some oil somewhere. Then there's that school fundraiser I have to organise. Now I have to remember that the school thing is not about oil. HAHAHAHA! It's so hard not to giggle when you say that….what? Oh the pink space pigs are calling me BWHAHA!

And so ends the life of a miserable failure

Right, let's get on with it (I dare anyone to count how many times I have used the word "right" so far in this entire fic)

Kidnap George Bush and feed him biscuits for hours until he begs for mercy (they must have been digestives then) once he is crazed feed him to the master's head and then weld that onto Davros' shoulder. This has no point in the activity, I'm just talking endlessly so to fill up the rest of the space left. Right, about 200 words left, oh here's a new paragraph!

Now play the crap songs while your Dalek and Davros battle in big arena type thingy until the giant spiders invade the planet in 3245, I know this doesn't actually happen in a Doctor Who episode, I'm just making it up. (HENCE THE WORD FICTION! DUHH!)

Once both Dalek and Davros are crushed the spiders will rule the world and everything will die! BWHAHAHAHAHAHA!

And the cup of tea? Well that's for you to drink after performing all this weird (CENSORED) I've forced you into doing so far.

I know I said I would do another 200 words but seeing as I've only done 104, so I'll just repeat the next 89

Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why,

Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why, Why,

Why, Why, Why, Why, Why,

There, I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M ASKING WHY BUT, WHO CARES?

Thank you, you hateful people and good outnike to you