Hi! Thank you for reading my I feel sick/Invader Zim crossover fic.

All characters are copyright Jhonen Vazquez (except for the football player)

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Dear Diary,

I'm so miserable, I'm in my mid twenties, I live in a crappy little apartment, my life has been filled with nothing but idiocy and lunacy. Tenna's annoying, ugh, she's trying to play match-maker again.

"Devi, stop writing in your stupid journal!"

Ugh, Christ.

-Sincerely,

Devi 09/26/2000

"Please Dev', c'mon, go out with this guy, please" she asks me.

"Tenna, what pleasure does it give you to see me with a social life?" I asked her.

She ignored me, "C'mon!" and she pulled out that fucking toy, "do it for Spooky," she made this pouty face and squeaked it.

I said, "I hate you," and nodded in defeat.

Tenna grinned.

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What the FUCK was Tenna thinking!

This guy was the biggest jerk I'd ever met, a fucking dumbass!

The first thing he said to me was "Oh, it's some weird goth chick," and looked at me funny.

He played football or something. He just kept talking about how great last night's game was, and how he wanted to be a pro player, or something. I wasn't really listening, I was to bust thinking about wringing Tenna's neck.

We went to a carnival. He spent like $20 because of his stupid ego, trying to win me a stuffed animal, and eventually won me this goofy looking pink squirrel. Ugh.

The Ferris wheel was a disaster. Well, I didn't want to go on anyway, but he made me. So while its going up, he yawns-and-stretches his arm around me. What the fuck right? Then at the top, he shoves his fucking tongue in my mouth! And grabbed my boob! So I bit his tongue and ran off (as the Ferris wheel got off a few seconds after this happened).

"What the hell you bitch!" he yelled as he ran after me.

"What do you expect you dick! You raped you with your tongue!"

"Girls love that move!"

"Girls do not LOVE to be grabbed and have a mouthful of spit forced down their throats! Leave me alone!" I screamed.

Then out of nowhere, this guy stopped me and said, "Babe?" Then winked at me, "who is this guy?"

I gave him a small smile and said, "Oh please baby, don't hit me again!"

"Well I won't this time, but if I catch you with another man again, then Im'a whoop both yer asses!" he said with a hick accent.

"Oh, I love you Baby! C'mon, lets git home t' Heather and Joseph!" I said, copying the accent.

By now the football loser was gone, we must've freaked him out.

"Thanks," I smiled at him, "what's your name?"

This guy looked kind of nerdy, but cute. He wore glasses, and had the weirdest, most wild hair I had ever seen. It was black and had this weird…thing to it, well I'll show you a picture.

"I'm Bryon, you?"

"Devi"

"Um, do you wanna get a drink or something?" he asked.

I considered saying no, but I also realized he was really nice so far.

"Sure"

It turned out to be a nice date. No serious injury, or loss of bodily function control, or anything. He was a scientist, which was cool. He said he wanted to be a famous inventor. When I went home, we exchanged phone numbers.

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Dear Diary,

Tonight was great! Not the asshole football guy Tenna set me up with. But the scientist guy I met after him. He was the best date I ever had, and I plan on calling him. His name was Bryon Membrane.

-Sincerely,

Devi 09/27/2000

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Thank You! Please review.

I will update soon.