A/N: There is nothing quite like a little inspiration in the morning! Actually, thismight not bethe best bolt of inspiration I've had, but hey—it was morning! Please enjoy this one-shot, and review if you would like to.

Disclaimer: Most assuredly not mine.

The Memorial Service Of Fredrich Von Houten

It was a celebrated and often looked-forward to fact that upon entering Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry each student was allowed to register one magical pet.

Indeed, both Gwendolyn Finch and Jeffery Fletchly had Boreal owls bred in the very cold country of Finland—a fact Mr. Fletchly gave as the founding reason for his deeply passionate relationship with a one Miss Finch.

Peter Pettigrew often laughed about his pet rat, although only a very select number of students had ever seen his so-called "Wormtail".

Sirius Black enjoyed the highly lewd joke that his only animal was his "John Thomas". It was a statement that often got him detention from Professor McGonagall.

Narcissa Black took great pride in her heirloom blue Russian cat, named, for all intents and purposes, "The Russian" (dubbed so in the third year by Mr. Sirius Black).

Even Argus Filch, the caretaker of Hogwarts and a suspected squib, was allowed the tenure of a small, timid kitten called "Mrs. Norris". He could be regularly found whispering menacing-nothings about "rotten" students into Mrs. Norris's fluffy, pointed ear.

Lily Evans, however, disdained the possession of magical animals, and could often times be found in the Gryffindor Common room giving a highly impassioned plea for the release of all animals, both magical and non-magical for, in the red-head's fervent tones, "One should be able to do magic without the help of a creature! Why it lends to one's creativity to figure things out by themselves! And plus, what're all those poor school-employed owls going to do with themselves day and night?"

And so it was, on a ruggedly gray morning, ten days after Bonfire night that the shouts ringing from the Gryffindor common room provoked the deepest sympathy amongst the students of Hogwarts, for what a loss it was to the wizarding world…

"LILY EVANS, YOU KILLED MY FISH!"

Lily Evans, sitting on a soft, red chair next to the roaring fire in the common room looked blankly at James Potter as he thundered down the dormitory stairs toward her.

Unlike many of Hogwarts' students, Mr. Potter's pet of choice was not well known. In fact, many of the Gryffindor students had never heard of James Potter's prize-winning magical fish.

Still, as Mr. Potter dragged a shaking hand through his already disgruntled, but fashionably-so, black hair, few students could dispute the fact that James had lost a little bit of his heart on that morning.

"What do you mean I killed your fish, Potter? You don't even have a fish," replied Lily, standing up from her seat and setting the book she had been reading down on the chair cushion. It was as if she were preparing for some sort of confrontation, which, given the two students' history, she most likely was.

Potter's mouth hung open as he whispered in a squeaky voice wrought with disappointment, despair, and disbelief, "Don't have a fish? Don't have a fish! 'Course I've got a fish! I should know! Especially seeing as you KILLED IT!"

And with this last cry, Potter turned toward a corner of the room, clapping a hand over his mouth and obviously too emotional to look his fish's killer in the face, no matter how pretty she might be.

"Oh? And pray tell—what was its name?" Lily asked coolly.

Lily Evans was all walls and barriers when it came to James Potter and his ludicrous out bursts. It had taken her years to become immune, but she had, in fifth year, finally succeeded.

She didn't bat an eyelash last year when James had announced to the entire student population that she was cold, heartless, and had an unwavering, and confusing fondness for the worst curry one could get in the London area. Neither did she waver in her cool aloofness from the boy when he charmed a banner to follow her for a whole day with the words "The Copper-coiffed One" written in loopy red letters on it. Instead, she had demurely replied that she was surprised Mr. Potter knew such astonishing words as "coiffed".

It was only now, in Lily and James' seventh year at Hogwarts that she felt as if immunity to Mr. Potter was not longer needed. He had become much quieter, and only picked fights and pranks under certain conditions.

Similarly, James Potter was quite adapted to the biting comebacks and cool interrogations from Lily, having devoted a good amount of time to experiencing them, all in the name of science, or so he once told Remus Lupin when asked just why he deliberately annoyed her. Lily Evans could say what she liked, but James Potter would never relinquish the acquired hobby of "Lily-bugging".

Until, that was, she killed his fish.

"His name was Fredrich Von Houten, Lily, and I'll ask you to have a little more respect for my poor marine animal!" Cried James, turning back to Lily.

Lily stared at James for a moment as he screwed his face up in what he must have thought to be a tortured look of anguish. "Er, right, James... Fredrich Von Houten is quite a name for a pet, isn 't it? But, nevertheless, I did not kill your fish."

"Your right. You didn't kill him. You murdered him," replied James dramatically.

A crowd had gathered around the two students, and at the last comment, many of the students clutched cats, mice, lizards, and unidentifiable magical species to their chests in obvious fear of Lily Evans—accused pet murderer.

Lily rolled her eyes. "Don't be a dolt, James. If I didn't know that you had a fish, then how could I have done him in?"

"AHA!" Cried James, swinging his arm out and pointing violently at Lily. "But you did know that I had a fish. I told you yesterday after charms!"

"After charms?" Said Lily, wracking her brain for any such conversation with James Potter. She distinctly remembered him trailing her after charms, asking her a question of some sort, but… "But you never told me about your fish—you asked me out again, like always."

Mr. Potter shook his head at her in stunned disbelief as, from the crowd of fearful onlookers, Lily's good friend, Amelia Urqwinn, stepped forward.

"That's not exactly true, Lily… James didn't ask you out—he asked you to feed his fish for him." Amelia said sadly.

Lily felt her stomach fall guiltily… Potter asking her out had taken a bit longer than normal… And wasn't he giving her instructions of some kind? She turned back to James, who was looking at her with a cold and knowing look.

"Potter?"

"Amelia is quite right, Lily. I haven't asked you out in ages. Yesterday I asked you if you would not feed my fish for me. You shouted 'No!' at me, which obviously meant that you would, indeed, feed my fish. Then I proceeded to tell you what you needed to do." James said.

Lily frowned and rolled her eyes again, trying to ignore the slightly guilty feeling she was getting. "James, you ought to know that it's a reflex for me to shout 'no' at you these days! Bloody hell—I see your shaggy head bobbing down the corridor toward me and mouth is already forming the word! And anyway, why'd you ask me if I wouldn't feed your fish for you?"

James was shaking his head at her once more. "Oh no, Lily, do not pin this on me. You killed my fish by starvation because you won't ever give me a chance."

And with that, James gave her a sad look, then turned around and walked back up the stairs to the boys' dormitories.

Amelia said to Lily, "Bad luck", and then walked toward the other side of the common room, cooing to her orange tabby cat, "Tangerine". The crowd around Lily gave her pitying and shameful looks before dispersing so thatMiss Evans was left alone next to her chair.

Lily stood there for quite some time…thinking.

What James Potter had said was quite true. Here a helpless animal had died because Lily wouldn't even give James the time of day, let alone listen to a thing he said to her. And when she really thought about it, James hadn't asked her out in quite some time. It was as if he had given up on her until yesterday when he had asked her to feed his fish.

If only unintentionally, Lily was, indeed, a pet murderer.

And how horrible! For now Lily Evans, the self-proclaimed friend of all creatures was a dirty hypocrite!

Lily looked at the floor for a moment before deciding that she could not live with herself if she just went back to her book and forgot all about James Potter and the fish she murdered.

Taking a deep breath, Lily looked around quickly at the students in the common room who refused to make eye contact with her. When she was sure they weren't paying attention, she walked resolutely to the stairs that lead to the boys' dormitories. It was her only chance to redeem herself, she knew, and so without further hesitation, she marched up them.

Standing in front of the door marked "Seventh Years", Lily knocked.

For a moment, no sound was heard. Then there was some shuffling, sniffing, a distinct gurgle of water, footsteps,and the door suddenly opened. James stared at Lily for a moment before opening the door wider and nodding his head.

"Look, James," said Lily, "I'm really sorry that I didn't feed your fish and all. I just… Well I never really thought… You see…"

She trailed off and James picked up where she left off. "You just never really thought that I'd ask something of you that's serious? Maybe that I wouldn't get over pulling pranks and all that?"

Lily nodded. James was doing a good job of making her feel bad, but he was right.

"Well," he continued, "I did. And, I suppose it's not your fault entirely, Lily. I should have checked on Fredrich last night, but I just assumed… Well, you know."

"Yes," Lily replied. "Yes I do know. I'm sorry for your loss, James."

James nodded again and looked at Lily uncertainly. "You wouldn't… Er…?"

Lily, having learnt her lesson, did not scream 'NO!' in James's face at the mere hint of a question. Even if he were about to ask her out, most certainly no more fish would die at the hands of Lily Evans. And besides, James asking her out no longer sounded so offensive to her ears. So, instead, Lily looked at James expectantly, waiting for him to continue.

"Well, I mean, would you like to come to Fredrich's memorial service?" James asked.

Lily nodded, smiling at Mr. Potter, who looked very sad indeed. "Yes, I certainly would. It's the least I can do, James. When is it?"

James looked a little relieved and a little less despairing. Reaching down, he took Lily's hand and said quietly, "It's actually right now…"

Asmiling Lily Evans let James Potter tug her into his empty dormitory room. They failed to notice that the stairs up to the dormitories, and in fact the common room below were silent and stuffed full with students clutching various pets. The students held their breath as they listened to Lily's apology and James's invitation, their furry, clawed, and scaled comrades shifting in their arms.

As the door clicked shut behind Lily, the students below exchanged looks with one another and smiled at their beloved magical pets.

It seemed as if perhaps that little piece of James's heart that was lost that morninghad also beenfound. For James Potter's prized magical fish, Fredrich Von Houten may no longer have a place in the wizarding world, but his memorial service would not be a completely unhappy one.