E t e r n i t y
Hell's Doorstep
Beast Boy was stirring. A remnant of life was still fighting within him. A voice whispered to him. Garfield Logan. Garfield Logan, wake. He reached for the source of the voice to see if it was real, but he felt nothing.
Is any of this real?
It is real, the voice told him. And so he believed it. It was a shakey belief, but at least it was something, enough to rouse some feeling in him. His back tingled as if someone was running their fingers between his shoulder blades. His face felt wet with tears, or maybe it was blood. His fingers, arms, legs, and feet were numb. Perhaps he had ran a thousand miles. It didn't matter as long as he had somewhere to sleep now. But…to remember the pain, to remember was enough to make him cringe. Hell was real. As real as his curling legs, and his opening eyes. The room wasn't blindingly bright, and he could keep his eyes open. It was plain with nothing in it save for the bed that he was on. Steel acted as a poor mirror for him, and he winced at his reflection. Dried tears covered his face, and blood, still warm, dyed his hair a matted black. His green eyes, that would normally be clear, were red in the corners. He turned away from his reflection, feeling repulsed and disgusted at his current state.
"I'm safe. I'm safe," he mumbled, recoiling into a tight ball. "Safe." He felt as helpless as a kitten. Feathers ran down his back like rain. What was this? He tried to reach back, but his arm seared with pain, and he had to withdraw it. He ran a tentative right hand over his left arm, expecting the worst, but surprisingly nothing seemed wrong with it. He couldn't feel any breaks at least. Well, there was nothing to do now but sleep. His eyes closed, but sleep eluded him. Energy was coursing through him like electricity, like sparks would fly from under his fingertips. He wanted to jump up and run, or life weights, or something. His shifted in the soft bed, and held his breath. Beating, beating, beating. He was seeing himself die while the electricity warped through him. He was watching the heart in front of him keep beating, beating, beating. A million lines extended from him. Memories. And they were connecting him with a million other people. Around him swarmed a hoard of demons, small impish creatures with nasty little black wings that reeked of their own blood, and eyes that shone yellow in the darkness, fingers that dripped slime, fangs that dropped saliva, and a wicked smiles that revealed a wicked thirst for chaos. Each demon was messily cutting a line, cutting a memory. Beast Boy pressed his knees closer to his chest.
"It's over, done. You're safe now BB," he reminded himself. Still, the reminder of Hell would always be there, a demon in itself, and memories would always be lost if they had been cut. The thought was unbearable. If he had just stayed a little longer, he would have nothing left to remember.
"Garfield Logan," he said to himself. "My name is Garfield Logan."
"Well Garfield, glad to see that you're all right." A cheery, grinning angel said, appearing suddenly in front of him.
"Who-?"
"I am Kaizoku, Angel of Revival," he said, pronouncing the title with emphasis. "I was told to search for you, and those like you. I hope you weren't it the Pit for too long," he said crypically. Beast Boy seemed ready to ask another question, so Kaizoku just went ahead with what he thought would be a decent answer. "You've been rescued from Hell, because you asked for help, something humans rarely do. Demons cut off all memories of how to be meek, and forgiving, and, well, just a good person really until the person they're attacking becomes little less than a demon themselves. I am glad that I got to you in time." He shrugged. "The Higher Power set me to the task of rescuing and finding those, like you, that could be Heavenly Warriors. Not quite so high as angels, you understand, but some still are able to make it into the Host."
"The- the host?"
Kaizoku's smile grew, and he shook his head. "You wouldn't know would you." He didn't sound condescending at all, only amused that he could have left out such an important explanation. "I would have thought that The Higher Power put it in the Books, but maybe I'm mistaken. The Host is a gathering of Heaven's Soldiers, of course. They'll, well let's see, scout for demons, stand guard over the Followers, and the like. Although some, like Reasich, are assigned the gruesome task of sending the Doubters to Hell. Horrible job, that is. Do you understand now?"
Beast Boy said nothing, trying to recover from this sudden onslaught of information. The Host? Heaven's Soldiers? What?
"Well, I guess I need to start your training. Let's see if I can get you cleaned up first." He held one hand out, and waved it. Beast Boy's hair was righted to its normal color, and every injury was gone. No longer did dried tears cover his face.
Beast Boy nodded meekly to the jovial angel, and stood. His legs were trembling like he had gained another thirty pounds all at once, but he was standing and that was enough for Kaizoku. The angel beamed, and lead him down a hallway. It closely resembled the place where he had been before Hell. The resemblance made him want to cower under Kaizoku's large white wings like a child. His sneakers made soft pitter-patter sounds on the floor. It didn't take the pair long to arrive at their destination. A few strides down the hallway, and then there was another door. Kaizoku grinned slyly.
"When you're done with training, you'll be able to teleport. Right now the most you're able to handle is having someone else take you about a mile."
"You just teleported?"
"Yep." Kaizoku's hand found the handle, and he gently pushed the door open. His sudden quietness made Beast Boy uneasy. What was behind the door? He couldn't see over Kaizoku's broad soldiers. Both were enveloped in a light as soon as Beast Boy's foot hit the other side of the door. The light was too much for his eyes, so he had to cover them. When he cautiously opened them, he was standing with Kaizoku on an impressive mountain. Clouds drifted lazily only a few miles away. The sun was just setting, melting into night with shades of purples. The brightest stars were already visible in the sky. Beast Boy looked around at the dark hills while there was still some light to see by. Even where the shadows fell he could pick out small shafts of light and moving creatures, trees, and streams. Funny. As if became darker, his sight improved. It wasn't as if it remained bright from his point of view, but without light he could sense the moving animals, bedding down or waking up. Maybe this was an ability of the Host? Kaizoku made a strange sound in his throat.
He said, "Your eyes are glowing. Can you see out there?" Beast Boy nodded numbly, and wondered if the tone Kaizoku had used was one of disapproval. The angel sounded upset. Hey, he could be jealous, right?
After a calming silence, Kaizoku spoke again. "Your first trial is flight. It's hard at first, and you're probably going to fall." Beast Boy grinned. Flying. Easy... "NO shape shifting!" Kaizoku added. "There will be those that will steal your ability. You'll have to learn how to fly without changing your body."
"How am I supposed to fly without wings?" Beast Boy growled. He wasn't too keen on flying without changing.
Kaizoku chuckled. "When I'm done with you, you won't need wings." He shot Kaizoku a disbelieving look, but the angel only shook his head.
"Come," he said. Once again, the two were walking, this time through trees on the mountain trail. They climbed until both were shivering with every gently breeze; it was very cold this high.
"Here," Kaizoku said. "If we go higher, the air will be too thin." Their feet rested on rocky ground were trees feared to grow. Beast Boy could look down into a valley thousands of feet below, and sense a bear smelling through berry bushes for food. Behind her a cub yowled pitifully. He enjoyed just being able to "watch" them, but Kaizoku was sending sharp, hinting glances at him.
Reluctantly, Beast Boy asked, "So, what do I need to do?"
"Ever seen a bird fly? I'm sure you have. In fact, you've been a bird before, haven't you?"
"That's it?"
"Good luck."
"Sure." He took a deep breath, and looked over the rocky overhanging. "I think I'm insane," he muttered.
Kaizoku grinned. "Not insane. Trusting is more like it, I would think."
"They're one in the same, aren't they?" He didn't expect a reply. He tried to imagine wings identical to Kaizoku's wings on his back, and pretended they were snapping open. He almost felt a breeze hitting them. Almost. He ran forward, towards the edge, hands clenching, heart racing, mind freezing as he sped towards pure madness. There was no stopping now; nothing short of a miracle would help him stop. His feet lifted off the mountain's face, and he pretended wings flapping and fighting for altitude. For about two seconds he could hear the beating of air. For about two seconds he was really flying. But then, doubt filled him, and the swish of feathers were gone, and he could not pretend. He was suspended in air momentarily, but then he was falling.
"Aaa!" His arms spun frantically. Nothing worked. Would he die? I can't die, he remembered. That didn't matter. This would hurt. Right before he hit the ground, literally a half second before he hit the ground, he stopped. He sighed in relief, then dropped. It still hurt, but it was much, much better than what it could have been. He rubbed the arm he had landed on. Pins and needles shot through it.
"I suppose I'll have to walk back up there." He grumbled.
Hold on. You might as well try teleporting. Kaizoku.
Since Beast Boy didn't know how to use mind-speech, he said aloud, "How?"
Kaizoku gave no reply, but then he was next to Beast Boy. "Well, nevermind. That was quite enough for today, I think. You look hungry, and you still know nothing of the Host."
That was fine by Beast Boy. It was pure madness to fly without shape shifting. A flash of light later, and the two were back in the dull undecorated room as before, except now Beast Boy could see the mountains on the walls, life continuing as it had without them. He let Kaizoku lead him from the mountains.
Something weighted heavily on Beast Boy's mind, and he didn't think that he could eat until he got it out. His friends...where were they? In Hell? Had they also called out? Was it possible?
Timidly, he asked, "Kaizoku, would you mind if I saw, uhm, Cy or Star or Raven?"
Kaizoku did not look back at him as he answered. "I'm sure that you want to, Garfield."
"Of course I do."
Turning on his heel, Kaizoku said, "Cyborg and Starfire have lost too many memories, Garfield. Raven is the only one we might be able to retrieve...But...she has been in Hell, Garfield, is still in Hell, and once you're done visiting she will go back to Hell. You will be the one to send her back to Hell. It would be far better if you left her. Pain is only intensified by pleasure."
Beast Boy was flabbergasted. "I don't know." He wanted to see her, but at what price?
"You still want to see her, and so you shall." He did not look Beast Boy in the eye as he lead him the other way. They must have teleported again, because it didn't take long to arrive to Hell's doorstep, the place thatBeast Boyhad been right before he had watched his heart become torn from his chest. Now a bench rested along the wall.
"Sit." Beast Boy sat. Kaizoku closed his eyes, and raised his hands, holding them still for several moments before lowering them again. "And now," he said. "We wait to see if Hell will grant a 'visiting' period. They certainly will. I will leave you alone. When she leaves, I will know." Beast Boy's nerves were racing. Surely he wasn't going to hurt Raven. Surely he wasn't.
- - - - - - - - -
Robin had watched Trigon smash the city into dust beside the bodies of his friends. All feeling was being fed into a quiet whirlpool. It whipped all emotion into it, replacing it with something primal. Rage. Even so, even while he watched the city fall under Trigon's fist, he was in the eye of the storm.