Incubus offers Satan some extravagant advice on how to win over Arle. Requested by a tumblr anon!

Making A Date Night

"This is...not what I was expecting when I asked for help."

"Nonsense! This is one of the best ways to woo a lady!"

"I think I would've had better luck asking Schezo, and he still can't fix his awful colloquialisms."

Incubus burst into laughter and covered his eyes with his hand, appearing painfully dramatic to Satan. He held a rose in his mouth, his tiny fang overlapping the thorny stem. Before them was a candlelit dinner with elegant red wine in glossy, floral patterned bottles. The tablecloth was a fine linen, and the silverware sparkled like stars underneath the deep red mood lighting illuminating every corner of Satan's private dining room.

"When I asked you for romantic advice to impress Arle, I wasn't expecting for you to take over my dining room," Satan deadpanned, narrowing his eyes at his smirking companion.

Incubus tutted and waved his finger. "Don't get so stingy especially when I didn't do anything you wouldn't do to make Arle swoon. All of the beautiful women in the world would kill to be treated like this! Indulging in the fanciest of dinners and-"

"I'm telling you that Arle would not like caviar!" Satan snapped, leaping to his feet and pointing at his plate.

Frowning, Incubus shifted his gaze to their meal. On porcelain plates were delicate portions of caviar on top of freshly buttered pancakes. Dolloped with sour cream and chives, it certainly appeared like a meal Arle Nadja would not eat even if she was starving in a dungeon.

"Arly loves spicy curry hot enough to melt her tongue off!" Satan snatched a tiny tablespoon and jabbed it into his modest helping of caviar. "She certainly wouldn't like eating fish eggs! I wouldn't even feed this stuff to Carbunny, and he's a glutton!"

"Oh, but to try new things is the epitome of romance," Incubus countered, and he spat his rose into his hand; Satan wrinkled his nose and rolled his eyes. Rolling his wrist, he stuck the rose behind his pointed ear. "Your fiance is adventurous. New things bring out her passionate side. As much as I would love to woo her, that fiery girl would be eager to eat something new if it tickles her interest."

"Don't even think about flirting with Arle. You're definitely not her type." Satan sighed and sat down, resting his elbow on the table. He dug his tablespoon through the caviar and watched the tiny eggs mesh into the chives.

Incubus chuckled. He leaned forward and cupped his cheeks, a mischievous glint playing in his eyes.

"What's that look for?" Satan grumbled, unevenly cutting through his pancake.

"Well, it almost feels like we're on a date. Mood lighting and wine and all those nice, fuzzy feelings."

Snorting, he broke into a wry grin. "I think I'll pass. If there ever comes a time when I'm open to a relationship, I may consider you if you were the last man in Puyo Hell."

Pouring himself a glass of red wine, Incubus snickered. He leaned back in his seat and swirled the scarlet liquid around, watching in blank fascination as it passed over the rim. As the cool wine trickled down his palm, he took a quick swig and uttered a satisfied sigh.

"Here's what you should do since this clearly isn't suiting you," he said, setting his glass down. "Invite Arle and Carbuncle over for a curry dinner. Even she wouldn't pass up the chance to eat curry."

Satan chewed and swallowed his last bit of caviar, squinting at his friend. "I already said that earlier."

"No, no, no." He shook his head. "Make the setup the exact same. Some nice mood lighting and elegance all around. Make it fiery and passionate with some hot and spicy curry." Snapping his fingers, Incubus summoned a second rose and shot it at Satan. It stabbed the table, and one of the velvet petals shuddered, falling off into Satan's open palm. "That, my friend, is how a date night works!"

Satan let his explanation settle into his mind. With burning curry representing his passionate love for Arle and mood lighting for obvious reasons, it seemed like the perfect plan. He would sweep Arle off her feet, expressing his devoted love and adoration for her with each spicy bite. He could even imagine similar follow-up dates following the same pattern, and it made his lips stretch into his cheeks.

"Perfect! It sounds like it could actually work! Thank you, Incubus! This wasn't a complete disaster after all!" Shooting to his feet, Satan clenched his fists and broke into a wild grin. "Yes, yes, yes! Arly and Carbunny will swoon right into my arms!"

Clapping Satan's shoulder, the equally passionate Incubus shouted, "That's the spirit! Let's get those two wrapped around your finger with the best curry and lighting Puyo Hell can buy!"

As they laughed and plotted, Arle shuddered in the safety of her own home. She had a strange feeling she would be rejecting some curry in the near future, and it left her revolted.