Catalyst

by tempest-races

A catalyst is not consumed by a reaction, only precipitates it; remaining itself unchanged and yet instigating momentious change in the reagents. Like a catalyst, will they fall out of solution unscathed or will the reaction consume them both?

3. Citadel

AN: To answer a few questions that have been asked, this story is coming after the film and Jesse is dead. Sorry but the whole point of this story was to get away from my sort of larger than life style and write something more real, and I think from the way it looked at the end of the movie Jesse is dead. I guess he could manage to survive but in reality life often isn't that fair. The whereabouts of the rest of the team is unknown at this time. They'll be back at some point, don't worry. The story is mostly about how Mia and Vince come to terms with what happened, their new life, and the fact they figure Dom, Letty, and Leon will never return. The plan is to have twelve chapters, one sort of prologue one, which was 'Break Away' and one for each of the songs on the album 'Wreck of the Day' and trying to tell the whole story in twelve chapters is why the chapters are so long. As you might have noticed each chapter deals with one week of their lives, from one song to the next. Anyway, any more questions feel free to ask.

Catalyst

By - TempestRaces

Chapter Three – Citadel

Gem drove home sedately, status quo for her. She was scared the one time she pushed the Honda would be the time it finally just gave her the old one finger salute and died on her. She knew that she was going to need to add save for new car to save for moving into own place on her list of things to do with her tip money.

She pulled into her parking spot at home and went to her room, flopping back on her bed the moment she had her shoes off. As soon as she lay down she started to mentally deconstruct her performance on the stage. There wasn't a lot she could have done differently and she knew it. The song had come straight from her heart and her performance had been like letting people into her soul. It was hard to do that sort of thing any other way than all the way.

When she'd gotten the phone number from Vince he'd looked happy to give it to her. She wasn't going to have to worry that her calling Mia would tick him off. She felt a bit guilty her interest in Mia wasn't just in the girl herself, but in the insight she might get into Vince from her. She rationalized her feelings by telling herself she did like Mia, and did need some friends in Los Angeles.

Gem knew she had a need to take care of people who seemed to need it. Both Mia and Vince looked like they could use a friend. It had just seemed to Gem like Vince was better at making do on his own than Mia. She figured she'd call the other girl over the weekend and see what was up.

Her time on stage had left her tired out, an after effect of the adrenaline, she guessed. She was never quite as tired coming home from the Cobalt as she was this night and the fact it had been open mic night was the only discernable difference. She yawned hugely and got off her bed with some difficulty. She was getting ready and going straight back to bed, no staying up all night writing this time. She could hardly keep her eyes open as it was.

She arrived at work the next day feeling pretty good after a contented night's sleep and a relaxing day spent doing not much of anything.

"There's my resident superstar." Barry called as he watched Gem push through the door. "Ready for another fantastic Friday?"

"You know it!" Gem called back with a smile. She enjoyed her job. She liked dealing with the public and she really liked Barry and Barbara.

"Good. It's looking like its going to be a busy one."

"Why's that?" Gem asked, wondering what was so different about this Friday from the last one.

"That bar down the street, Barney's, got shut down for letting minors in. Most of the bars in this area will end up getting a piece of his customers since we're in the same area. Not to mention that we got Crazy Horse booked for tonight and they always go over really well."

"Well, busy just makes the night go by fast so bring it on." Gem started off toward the back area to ditch her stuff and get her apron on.

"So," Barry looked at her speculatively. "You and Grumpy Bear, was it? What's up there? You sweet on him?"

"No." Gem stammered and blushed slightly. "He felt bad about things is all and offered to let me use his guitar for my song. I talked him into playing it for me too since I couldn't play any guitar, no matter how nice of a guitar it was. Heck, even if it was Hendrix's guitar itself I couldn't play it well enough to go out on stage and try."

"Ok." Barry held up his hands. "I was just curious. It looked like he was giving you his number last night is all."

"His friend's number. Something about the girl he lives with," Gem trailed off and blew some stray hairs off her forehead in a huff. "She's so sad. I'm just going to call her sometime."

"Alright," Barry looked like he had more to say but thought better of it. He changed his mind again. "Gem!" He called after her as she was finishing her path to the back room.

"Yeah?" She turned to face him, pausing on her way.

"It's just that," Barry sighed. "I get the feeling this guy could be very bad news. There was some trouble a while back and he looks like one of the guys that was involved. I don't know if he was or wasn't, but I want you to watch out for yourself ok?"

"Sure. I only want to talk to Mia. It's not Vince I'm going to get involved with."

"Ok sweetheart, but still, be careful. Remember what I told you about L.A.?"

Gem's forehead wrinkled as she thought hard about the first night she'd met Barry. "That it can be a harsh place?" She asked, not sure.

"Yeah, with some harsh people, so just please be careful."

"I will." Gem walked away again, lost in thought. There had been some trouble a while back and Vince looked like a guy who had been involved. What kind of trouble? It would sure explain a lot if it had been some activity gone wrong.

She tied her apron on and turned to leave the back room which doubled as their staff room still lost in her own thoughts.

"Whoa there sugar." Barbara grabbed Gem by the shoulders to stop them from having a collision. "You look like you're on the moon."

"Not quite that far away, but close." Gem smiled at seeing the older woman who was fast becoming one of her only friends in L.A. "I'm just reflecting on Barry's 'L.A. is a harsh place' speech.

"Well, he's right. But he does tend to be overprotective of his ladies." Barbara smiled. "You just have to be careful who you run into here. Not everyone is who they seem to be on the surface."

"I know, and that's what scares me."

"Why, did something ha-"

"No, nothing like that. It's just that I need to find a new place to live soon and it's looking like I'll have a roommate. I don't know how to find one who's not a psychopath."

"Try the UCLA wanted bulletin boards. If you find a house of young ladies looking for one more that would be safer then moving in with some stranger."

"You're right. I'll hit the campus tomorrow and see who's looking for what. It's the best idea I've heard yet. I'm so sick of living in the rooming house."

"You live in a rooming house? Those places aren't safe!"

"This one is totally above board. I've been there three weeks now and never had a problem."

"That's now. You don't know who'll move in tomorrow."

"I said I was trying to move." Gem grinned, trying to reassure her friend. "I'll be ok. I'm careful about who knows I live alone and the people in the house don't know my folks don't live close."

"Ok, but I definitely second the opinion you need to find a new place."

"I'll get looking tomorrow." Gem put an arm around Barbara's shoulders and headed toward the main room of the club. "We got work to do woman."

"Yeah, look! It's your favourite customer!" Barbara said with a slight gesture toward the dark corner. "He's all yours honey."

"He's not so bad. Just don't let him intimidate you and he's not hard to take."

"You can have him Sugar. The fact he likes you was like music to my ears."

"He doesn't like me."

"Of course not sugar. Get to work." Barbara pushed her young friend off into the crowd.

"You shouldn't be encouraging her." Barry admonished as they both watched Gem smile in her genuine way at a table of young men.

"Encouraging her how?" Barbara asked in confusion.

"By encouraging her to take an interest in that man. You know he's likely one of those guys who got out of that thing on a technicality last year. Is that the kind of person you want Gem hooked up with?"

"Now Barry, you don't know he had anything to do with it. It was all kept pretty hush hush anyway. It could have just been a rumour, or it could have been played way out of context."

"Even still, he's too rough around the edges for Gem. She needs a nice artistic type, not some rough whatever he is."

"Mechanic." Barbara said absentmindedly as she contemplated the crowd.

"Come again." Barry asked, not getting the reference.

"He's a mechanic, he fixed Gem's car last week when it broke down. That's how she knows his name."

"Oh, well even still. She needs someone like her, artistic and musical."

"He played the guitar pretty well for a guy who isn't musical."

"You know that metal, head banger stuff isn't what I have in mind when I say musical."

"Umm." Barbara said with a small smile for her friend and moved off into the crowd. Barry watched her go with a frown. Barbara could take it into her head to play matchmaker. If she was going to play those games with Gem he wished she'd pick someone other then the man in the dark corner to be on the other end. He wasn't sure about why but the idea of Gem in a relationship with that man was very unsettling.

Gem slowly made her way around the room, delaying her trip over to Vince as long as she could. She didn't know why, since he wasn't drunk yet and they hadn't fought lately, but for some reason she didn't look forward to talking to him. Maybe it was because she thought now that he had come down from his performance with her he'd be upset she'd talked him into it.

As was the norm, it came to the point where if she didn't go see if he wanted anything it was going to be obvious she was purposefully not going over to his table. She took a second to find her smile and walked over.

"Evening." She greeted him.

"Uh." He grunted back for a reply.

"Get you anything?" She asked, making sure her smile came across in her voice. He only pointed at his bottle. So we're back to this. She delivered his drink and took a few more orders. She had just finished delivering a big tray of drinks to a table of young people when she heard Barry calling her.

"You got a phone call." He said as Gem approached the bar.

"I do?" Gem asked, puzzled. No one knew she worked at the Cobalt aside from people who were already in the bar. She sure as heck hadn't told her dad, who would have flipped out at her.

"I don't know any other Gems so yeah, you do." Barry held out the phone.

"I'm sorry for getting calls here. I never gave out the number or told anyone where I work. I don't know who it could be."

"It's fine, just answer the phone. She's on hold on line one."

She? "Hello?" Gem answered.

"Hi." An unsure female voice replied. "Well, this is strange." The voice giggled before continuing. "This is Mia, we met last Saturday."

"Oh yeah." Gem was surprised to get this call. She'd planned on calling the other girl herself the next day. "How are you?"

"I'm ok. I'm sorry to call you at work. I remembered where you said you worked and got the number out of the phone book."

"It's ok. I meant to call you. I got your number from Vince but I haven't had time to call."

"You did?"

"Yeah." Gem sighed. "It's just that I don't have a lot of friends here and you seemed nice."

"Thanks. I don't really have a lot of friends here anymore either. We'll get together sometime then. When's good for you?"

"I have work tomorrow at eight but I don't work on Sunday or Monday."

"Why don't you come over on Sunday and we'll make dinner?" Mia asked, the idea of having someone to cook for who might just appreciate it made her unreasonably happy. It was just that it had been so long since she'd sat down to a meal with someone who was both present and looking forward to her cooking.

"That sounds great! I'm getting so sick of takeout and I just can't bring myself to cook in a kitchen I share with ten males who can hardly clean themselves and their rooms let alone a kitchen."

Mia laughed. "That sounds familiar. Just come over around 3 or whatever's good and we can hang out while I cook."

"It's a date." Gem and Mia said their good-byes and hung up.

Gem stood staring at the phone for a minute after she'd hung it up. It had been strange to hear Mia's voice on the line. She'd intended to call the other girl but had kept putting it off out of nerves. It was like something was trying to tell her she was meant to talk to Mia and it wasn't going to be put off simply because Gem didn't have the courage to pick up a phone and dial.

The end of the night finally came. The bar had been packed just as Barry had predicted. However, Gem noted she still wasn't as tired while she escorted the last stragglers out the door as she had been the night previous. She locked the door and then leaned on it with a tired sigh. Busy meant lots of tip money. Her pocket of her apron was filled with it.

"Ok, I'm out of here. Someone want to lock the door behind me?" Gem called in the direction of the office.

"Sure honey. Drive safe, ok?" Barbara said as she came to let Gem out of the club.

"Always. See you tomorrow."

"See you then."

Gem headed off around the corner of the building with a wave for Barbara. As she rounded the corner she looked up to find someone sitting on her car hood. She jumped back in shock. The last thing she'd expected to find was someone waiting on her car. She couldn't decide if she should run back into the bar for help or just walk over and find out what whoever that was wanted. She leaned out and peeked at her car again.

It was about then she realized she knew the physique and shaggy hairdo. Vince. What's he doing on my car?

"Car won't go?" She called as she walked up.

"Just wanted to make sure no wierdos waited for you."

"So, did any?" Gem asked, a smile flirting with the corners of her mouth. Would he get the poke at him?

"Just one." He smirked back as he reclined onto his palms back on her hood.

She laughed. "Should I run and tell Barry to dial 911?"

"Not all wierdos are dangerous. Some just want to make sure your car starts and you aren't left in a parking lot alone with a car that won't run."

"I see. Well, in that case, I better see if the old girl is still alive so you don't have to sit on her all night."

"You know this car isn't going to last much longer right? The valve seals are shot on three out of four intake valves, the radiator is missing so many fins I don't know how it isn't leaking like a sieve and the tires are almost bald."

"All those things can be fixed." Gem answered tightly, defensive over her car even though she knew it was tired out.

"All those things would cost more to fix than this car is worth, even if I give you the labour at half price. Fuck, even if I do it all for free. The parts alone will cost you more than anyone would pay for this."

"Well, I'll just have to live with not driving fast in the rain and seeing the peals of blue smoke behind her for awhile."

"I hope you ain't due for a smog test any time soon and you don't hit any roadside checks. They're towing this puppy if you do. Make sure they tow it to my shop."

"I'm sure I'll be fine. I don't plan on doing any highway driving anytime soon." Gem slid into her car but left the door open so she could continue to talk if her new 'carsitter' was so inclined.

"How much could you spend on a car now?"

Gem pulled a wad of bills out of her pocket, the sum total of her tips for the night. "About this much."

Vince frowned. "Seriously."

"That is seriously. I need to find a new place to live and that means security deposits and utility deposits and groceries. I cannot afford another car right now."

"Ok, I get it. What about a car payment. What could you afford month to month."

"That's going to depend on where I end up living and how much it costs. I guess I could take the bus instead of having a car."

"You can't take the damn bus home from this area of town at this hour."

"Ok." He was so angry at the idea Gem agreed with him just out of principle. "I'll let you know what I could swing when I have a permanent place to live, ok?"

"Fine," He turned and started to walk away.

He is one of the rudest people I know, Gem thought. "'Night!" She called happily after his retreating back and grinned as he paused a moment, back going stiff. He only raised a hand and did a flippant little wave without turning around.

If he's so rude why are you grinning like a mad woman in the parking lot over some of his attention, even though it was to yell at you about your car?

She played Devil's advocate with her own mind. Because it's fun to bait him.

She started her car and turned on her lights before sliding it into drive and pulling out of the lot.

Vince watched her start her car and waited until she actually moved out of her space. Her transmission was going too but he didn't have the heart to dump that on her. She needed a new car. Even if she didn't he didn't know how she stood to drive around in that dusty little Honda. Slower then molasses flowing uphill in January, he thought with a smile. Until thinking of slow Hondas made him recall Hector thinking his Civic was fast. A fond smile crossed his face. Thought he could run with anyone in that ugly thing. Wonder what in the fuck he's up to now. Did he ever make the NHRA circuit? The smile quickly turned to a sneer accompanied by a roared expletive and slap to the top of the steering wheel.

Racing was over and done with. Thinking about it would just bring back the desire to go back to the warehouse. To go see Hector and Edwin. Shoot the shit and see what everyone was driving these days. That wasn't who he was anymore. It wouldn't be the same without the team. It was a chapter in a closed book.

So why do you want to fill the nitrous and go remind those guys who use to rule their world?

Dom use to rule their world. It was never you and it never will be so start the fuckin' car and go the fuck home!

Deciding he had simply been without female company too long and a certain part of his anatomy knew that the warehouse would be the easiest place to end the dry spell; he started the car up and squealed out of the parking lot. He didn't need an organized race to fulfill the desire to drive too fast. He could do it from any stoplight in the city.

He wasn't lucky enough to catch any reds until he'd driven around aimlessly for about half an hour. Then he hit one that had just changed and waited. Sure enough when a car pulled into the other straight lane the kid behind the wheel revved up his engine and looked over at Vince, the driver and all his friends laughing.

Laugh it up now, Vince thought. Soon as the Stillin spools I'll wipe the smile right off.

The light went green and both cars took off. It was mere seconds later when the kid who'd been so confident at the light switched lanes to get behind Vince and slowed down.

"Pussy." Vince said irately. He'd been hoping for a bit of a challenge. He turned the car for home with a sigh. Only a half day tomorrow, then he could spend all day Sunday hiding from Mia someplace. Something had to give.

Saturday night passed in a blur. Gem couldn't believe how many people showed up to the Cobalt. She wasn't surprised to see that Barry had hired a bouncer. Just for the really busy nights, Barry told her. Someone had to check ID's and kick out the rowdies and Barry said he knew 'his girls' had enough to worry about without worrying about carding people and dealing with real a-holes.

The pace kept Gem run off her feet. The Saturday crowd ordered a lot of shots and that always kept her busy. Gem watched as yet another drunk young person was escorted out of the bar to a taxi and wondered if people knew it was far harder to keep track of how much you'd had to drink when all you drank were shots. They didn't fill up your stomach like mixed drinks did, and you didn't have to go to the bathroom as often so you had less ways to gauge how much you'd had.

As she watched Billy, the new bouncer, escort yet another drunk young lady to the curb-a drunk young lady who Gem knew had been drinking Tequila shots all night-she figured the answer was no, they had no idea where their limits were. That was one of the big reasons why she rarely drank and mostly stuck to wine when she did. A glass or two of wine with a nice meal was the extent of her alcohol consumption for the most part.

'Her' mechanic, as everyone now called Vince behind the scenes-and that included Tamica and Elliott-was busy getting totally loaded for bear again. Gem saw another night of driving him home in her near future. There was no way they could let him drive in the state he was in. She hoped that he had his keys and didn't pass out this time. She'd hate to wake Mia up again. Mia looked like she needed all the sleep she could grab.

"We seriously need to rethink our policy on cutting people off." Gem said to Barry and Barbara as they surveyed Vince in all his soused glory after the Cobalt was closed.

"I think I finally see it your way." Barry answered on a sigh. "What're we gonna do with him?"

"Get him up and I'll get his keys and drive him home." Gem said after a moment's thought, ending on a sigh of her own. She really didn't need the extra hour of driving, tired as she was.

"We can just call him a taxi. You remember his address?" Barbara joined the conversation.

"I'll never hear the end of it for leaving his car here all night."

"It's hardly your problem." Barry said hotly, glaring at Vince. Not that the latter would ever know, not passed out leaned back in his chair like he was.

"I know, but I have a funny feeling when he's annoyed he makes life hard for Mia."

"Who's Mia?"

"His," Gem hesitated, unsure how to define the relationship Vince had with Mia. "His friend. I'll see if I can wake him up again."

"If you need a hand just holler." Barry turned to walk away and Barbara when with him.

"Vince, you have got to stop doing this." Gem said as she dropped into one of the other empty chairs at his table wearily. "Come on, wake up."

"Jesse, fuck off. It's Sunday. I ain't doin' shit to that Jetta on Sun-" He cut himself off on a snore.

He had a horrible habit of slurring his words, Gem thought as she tried to figure out what he'd said. "I'm not Jesse Vince. I'm Gem. Come on, wake up." She shook his shoulder, fighting a deja vu flashback to last Saturday night.

"Wha?" Vince woke up with a shake of his head and a grimace for what that did for his orientation of the room.

"Time to go home. Come on, up." Gem stood up, hands pushing off her thighs. "Let's go." She was glad when he listened. "Now hand over your keys." He gave her a belligerent look. "I know you aren't going to make me go through the whole speech again."

He handed over his keys with a sigh.

"You ever heard of gum?" Gem asked as she wrinkled her nose. "Your breath could take paint off walls." All she got was an even nastier look than the one over surrendering his keys. "Ok, we are out of here." She started for the door. Barbara handed over her purse as she walked past on her way to the door.

"Night sugar. See you Tuesday."

"See you then." Gem called back with a smile as she watched Vince almost trip over the doorsill on his way out. She shook her head with a sigh and a rueful glance at Barbara before following him out the door. She heard Barry lock the door behind her. "Ok, you need to tell me which of these keys opens your door."

"Why?"

"So I can make sure you get in the house without waking up Mia."

He looked like he was going to argue telling her which key was the house key on his chain but relented when he saw the look on her face. "It's this one." He pointed out the appropriate key unsteadily.

"Thank you."

The trip to the parking lot and rest of the ride home to Vince's house went by without incident. Of course, Vince was sulking. Gem did wonder if you could call it sulking when an adult man pouted, but since she really didn't have any other word for it, that was what he was doing in her mind. She knew he drifted in and out of awareness over the course of the ride home. She knew when he passed out because he talked to people in his sleep. He had imaginary conversations with several people but most of it came out too garbled for her to make heads or tails of.

She pulled up to his house and stalled the car by mistake as she was getting ready to turn it off.

"Holy fuck! You still don't know how to drive?"

At least it woke him up, she thought. "Sorry. Can you walk yourself into the house or should I go with you?" She asked with a sugary sweet smile.

"Take the fuckin' house key off the damn chain."

She complied and held the key out. "Sleep tight." Her smile became a huge grin at his expense as he tried without a lot of luck to get out of the low slung car. He must have caught her smile because once he was on his feet he turned back toward the cabin of the car and flipped her off.

As he listened to her enthusiastic laughing after he flipped her off Vince had to fight a chuckle of his own. What could he do that wouldn't simply goad her into being even nicer to him? Her laugh was honest and open, not forced or artificial.

He wondered briefly what she'd say if he asked her in before some pocket of common sense he hadn't known he still had made him slam the door. He watched as his own tail lights drove off and turned down a side street out of his sight.

He started up the front walk. "Don't wake Mia." He said out loud in a snobby, unflattering impersonation of Gem. "Yeah, heaven fuckin' forbid we wake Mia." He snarled as he used his key to open the house door. He continued to curse in his head even as he went out of his way to stumble quietly through the house, brushing his teeth with a vengeance instead of just passing out like he was inclined to do.

He woke up around dinner time the next day and dragged himself down the stairs. He set the coffee maker to brew a pot and sat at the kitchen table with his head in his hands. His head felt like someone was using an air chisel right behind it-it normally would have been Leon, Leon enjoyed using loud tools for extended periods just to piss off the other people in the shop around him-and it also felt like the room was spinning at two thousand rpm. He groaned, wanting to look at the coffee maker to see how close to ready the pot was, but he was scared if he moved his head he'd have to try and run upstairs for the bathroom and he didn't know if running was within his current abilities.

"Another one of those nights V?" Mia asked as she walked in the back door.

She sounded happy. Vince looked up and winced. Yep, definitely happy.

"When did you get home last night? I swear I didn't hear you."

"Dunno." He grumbled back and figured since the damage was done he might as well check out the coffee.

"Yes it's ready. I'll get you some." Mia said, smiling and crossed the kitchen to the mugs. She set the steaming black coffee in front of him seconds later.

"Thanks." He grumbled.

"No problem." Mia went back into the kitchen and started taking out pots and pans.

"Do you have to do that so loud?"

"I'm not being loud."

"Ok, sure." He clearly didn't believe her. "Do you have your new friend's phone number?"

"Who?" Mia asked in mock confusion.

"Gem. You have so many new friends you don't know which one I might mean?"

"Since you know her name why didn't you just use it? There's no need to be snippy and sarcastic with me because you got stupidly drunk and now you're facing the morning after. What do you want her number for?"

"Want my car back."

"You know V, she's not your taxi service."

"Never asked her to be."

"No, you more or less asked her to let you do something stupid that could have gotten you and God knows how many other people killed. She's too nice to let that happen. If you're going to drink that much, and lord knows I'd never dare tell you not to, the least you could do would be take a cab to and from the place so you don't have to drive."

"Jesus fuckin' Christ!" Vince roared, realizing after how stupid a move it had been when his ears started to ring. "Do you have the phone number or not." He asked through clenched teeth when his vision cleared.

"No I do not. It hardly matters because she already called this morning. She's coming to visit me later and I told her it hardly made sense for her to make a trip over here twice since you weren't even up yet anyway. She's going to drive over here for two and I will take her down to get her car then. That is if I have this lasagne ready to go into the oven by then."

"Is that your scratch lasagne?" Vince asked, perking up a bit and almost forgetting Mia had given someone permission to keep his car even longer than they had to.

"Yes, and if there is any left after Gem and I have our dinner then you can have it tomorrow for your lunch."

"What'd ya mean tomorrow?"

"I mean that for tonight you are officially kicked out of this house. I'm having a friend over and the last thing I want is you here being rude to her and scaring her off."

"If she was gonna get scared off she would have already. I met her first." Vince grumbled.

If Mia didn't know better she'd almost swear he sounded jealous that Gem was coming to see her and not him. "Maybe so, but either way, tonight is a girl's night and you are not invited. Go hang at the garage, go hang at Cory's-I'm sure he's having some sort of party you can fry your brains out at-or just go drive around the city all night. I don't really care which but you can't stay here."

"Fine, Jesus. I didn't know I wasn't welcome in my own house."

Mia had finally decided she was finished playing nice. It never got her anywhere with Vince anyway. "I was beginning to wonder if this was still your home anyway. You're never here. It's like this is your bed and that's about it. You sleep here. You could almost as happily live in your car. The bathtub taps still leak, you promised to pick up the back yard and mow the front but none of it ever got done. You never do anything and I never see you so it's not like you're all that attached to the place. It won't kill you to find someplace else to be tonight."

Vince looked taken aback at Mia giving him what for. He didn't know if he should be glad she was finally getting some backbone or upset she was doing it at his expense. "Fine, I'll go to Cory's tonight. I'll just stay there and head to work from his place tomorrow."

"Good. Soon as Gem brings your car back."

"You think you're going to like her don't you?"

"Yes. Why? Scared that I'll fill her in all about you?"

"Mia." Vince started in a warning tone of voice. "No matter how much you like this girl, and how nice you think she is, there are some things you can't tell her. You know that right? Just because nothing happened after doesn't mean something couldn't if the right people got wind of details of certain happenings."

"I know Vince. I'm not stupid. Just tired and lonely. I think I deserve a chance to have a life again don't I? You got your second chance, much as you're throwing it all away every day and night."

"I surrender Mia. You deserve to have friends." He stood up. "I'm going to shower and pack a bag before she gets here."

"Ok." Mia didn't look up from her cooking. Vince left the room with a sigh.

Gem woke up late. It was her habit to sleep in on Sundays ever since she'd moved to L.A. Use to be she would have been up bright and early every Sunday to go to church with her mother, father, and brothers. At first she just hadn't known where there was a church to attend services at and once she did know where a few were she'd been working at the Cobalt and early mornings were not her friend.

She got up, had a leisurely shower, telling herself she was entitled to take longer than fifteen minutes in the bathroom every once in awhile, and got dressed. She didn't really know what to wear. She didn't know what Mia's style was like and she didn't want to show up overly casual or too dressed up. She eventually settled on a sky blue short sleeved shirt and a pair of black cotton shorts. She grabbed both her own keys and Vince's and headed down to the building parking lot. She left her hair down, telling herself she was doing it just because it was still wet even though she knew it was because she thought she might want her hair to hide behind at some point.

With a sigh of relief she saw Vince's blue car was still in the same shape she'd parked it in. She got in and started it up. With a guilty look around she ejected Vince's CD from the player and slid her own in. She hated to break it to Vince, but she hated his taste in music. The burned CD she removed from the CD player had given her a headache half the way home from his house to her own, before she'd figured out how to change the setting to radio instead of CD. His stereo looked like something straight out of a science fiction story.

She'd thought her own nice. Her brother had bought it for her as a gift. Second hand, but top of the line, he'd said. It was clear his idea of top of the line and some other people's were quite different. As she pulled out of the parking lot her CD started playing Gloria Gainer's hit 'I will survive'. Gem belted out the words along with the artist at the top of her lungs as she drove with the windows down, letting the air whip around the interior.

Her brother had told her anyone who lived for music the way she did deserved to have the best stereo money could buy, but that on what he made from their parents he couldn't afford that stereo. They'd laughed before he'd told her the one he had managed was very nice and in good shape, even used.

He'd set up the sub to just fill in the low end for her, not to rattle the teeth out of her head. She knew on the system in Vince's car if she really turned it up on a bass filled song she'd be in danger of rattling the windows right out of the car. She pulled up to a red light and downshifted into neutral to wait for the light to go green. She heard a funny noise and looked over to her left. Some guy was sitting in the next lane over revving his engine at her.

Why? Was his car going to stall? It was about then she realized he wanted her to race him when the light went green. She shrugged. It wasn't her car so she wasn't racing it, but it wouldn't hurt anything to take off as fast as she could if she didn't break the speed limit doing it, would it?

When the light went green she got it in first as fast as she could and took off. The force of the take off threw her back into the seat and she was suddenly glad for how close it hugged her body. By the time she shifted the car into third gear she realized she had passed the guy in the other car. She looked down and saw how fast she was going. "Oh boy." She said to herself as she let off the gas. The car made a strange popping noise as she did so and she worried she'd broken something. She finished the drive at or slightly above the speed limit. The car never made the noise again but she knew she was still going to have to mention it and dreaded doing so.

She pulled up to the curb of what she now thought of as Mia's house and parked the car. She put the windows up and put the CD player back the way she'd found it.

The door opened while she was looking down at the CD player and she gasped, looking up.

"Did you figure that out ok?" Vince asked from beside her, crouching down.

"It only took me 15 minutes to get the CD in." She answered, sensing he wasn't mad about her using the radio. He laughed.

"I take it you never made it do this then." He reached across her and pushed a button on the electronic device above the CD player proper and a 7 inch TV monitor slid out and flipped up.

"Wow. Is that TV? In the car?"

"Not TV. It's a DVD player."

"Really?" Gem asked in shock.

"Yeah. If you really looked around the car in daylight you'd notice the two extra screens in the back." Vince grinned.

"Why do you need TV in your car?"

"Because I can have TV in my car."

"I'll never understand male logic as applied to electronic accessories." Gem answered with a grin of her own.

"You didn't have any trouble with it on the way here."

"Not trouble so much." Gem pulled a face. "It made a funny noise when I had to let off the gas once though."

"After you were speeding?"

She looked chagrined. "Maybe a little." She held her first finger and thumb up a few centimetres apart. "It's just that I never had a car that actually accelerated when you wanted it to before and it went a bit to my head."

"Don't panic. It's ok and the noise is just the blow off for the supercharger letting off pressure. It always makes that noise after it goes into boost and then doesn't need the boost anymore."

Gem sighed in relief. "I'm so glad to hear that. I was worried I'd broken it."

"You'd have to really try to break it. I'll take you for a ride some time and show you that after the way I drive, the car thinks it's on vacation with you behind the wheel."

"I think I'd like that." Gem blushed after she made her admission.

"Well, it won't be today because Mia kicked me out so you two could have a girl's night in without me."

"Can't say I blame her." Gem smirked.

"Get in the house before I change my mind about the drive then."

Gem picked up her bag off the passenger side and stood up out of the car. "I'm going then." She started to head around the car toward the front walk.

"Gem?"

His call of her name stopped her. "Yes?"

"Nothin'. I'll see you around."

"Ok, see you around." She turned back toward the house and walked the rest of the way up the lawn, shouldering her bag.

Gem heard Vince take off from the curb with a squeal as she knocked on the front door hesitantly. Now that she was about to come face to face with Mia in daytime she was very nervous.

The door was pulled open, opening into the interior of the house. "Hey." Mia said, smiling happily. "Come in." Mia pushed the screen door open and stood back to let Gem pass her into the shady interior of the house.

"Hey. How are you?" Gem asked as she stopped in the hall.

"Good. Come on back this way with me." Mia led them through the house to the kitchen in the rear. It was small but had a breakfast bar across half the entrance with a couple of stools positioned in front of it. "Have a seat." Mia waved toward the stools. "I'm just going to finish this up and we'll go get your car."

"No rush. My car's not going anywhere."

"Is it broken again?" Mia frowned, thinking they should have sent Vince after it if it was broken down again.

"No. It's just so pathetic that no one is going to steal it. Heck, if they did and tried to speed away the thing would likely blow up anyway."

"That bad huh?"

"Well, Vince says the tires are bald, the valve something-or-others-whatever they are, three out of four of them-are shot, and the radiator is hanging onto its contents by its fingernails."

"Wow. Can't he fix it?"

"He can, but he says it wouldn't be worth it so I may as well get a new one. I just can't swing it right now."

"I bet driving the Maxima was a treat for you then."

"That might just be the understatement of the year." Gem giggled. "When I pushed on the gas and it took off I almost died of shock. I don't think I ever owned a car that did that before. Most of them sort of cough and sputter a bit before they move. I didn't want to give it back."

"You just might be the first person other than my brother who ever got to drive that car. Well, besides Vince, who acts like he raised it from birth, not slapped some aftermarket parts on it and let Jesse tune it for him."

"Can I do anything to help you?" Gem asked, realized she had been rude not to offer.

"No, I have it under control."

"I was wondering anyway, who are Jesse and Leon? Vince talks to them in his sleep." Mia gave Gem a curious look. "I mean when he passes out in the bar, not like sleep sleep. Not that I'd know." Gem snapped her mouth shut, realizing her embarrassed babbling was making the situation worse not better.

Mia's gaze lost focus and it was clear she was deep in her thoughts. She seemed to come out of it and met Gem's eyes again. "Jesse and Leon were friends of ours. They were best friends. Jesse was killed last year and Leon ran off on us. What does Vince say about them?"

"It's always about cars. Like 'Leon I don't wanna work on your car yet. Wake me up later.' Or 'Jesse, um, f off, I ain't workin on that," Gem coughed rather than repeat the words Vince had used, "car on Sunday."

"Well, the boys all use to run the shop together, them and my brother. I guess that's why he talks to them like that. He spent a lot of his time up until last year working on cars with them."

Mia looked sad when she talked about the loss of her friends and brother. Much as Gem wanted to find out more about how Jesse had died and where the rest of the people Vince talked about had gone she decided to let it go for now. She didn't want their first day spending time together to be about bad memories.

"Well, I didn't know what you wanted to do after dinner so I stopped at the video store this morning. I also didn't know what kind of movies you liked to watch so I got two. 'Under the Tuscan Sun' and 'Blade:Trinity'."

"That's a great idea. Which would you rather watch?"

"Under the Tuscan Sun."

"I might just be in love with you Gem Davis. I can't remember the last time someone picked the girlie movie to watch. I felt like I was the only woman living with five guys."

Some quick mental math on Gem's part came up with only four guys. She thought it out again. Vince, Leon, Jesse, the brother. "You lived here alone with five guys?"

"Almost. Letty was female by gender and male by nature, most of the time."

"Letty?"

"My brother's girl. She took off with him, where ever they went." Mia knew what she'd told Vince, but it felt good to finally get some of what she'd kept inside for so long out in the open.

"I get a feeling you'd rather not go into this right now." Gem said, giving Mia a way out.

"I think I would like to talk about some of it if you don't mind. I know we just met so I don't want to dump all my problems on you right off the bat."

"I'm a pretty good listener and to be honest I knew from the first time I saw Vince drowning himself that something wasn't right."

"I can't go into all the details. I wish I could."

"I don't want to pry Mia. If you want someone to talk to I'm here. I must have seen this coming." Gem smiled reassuringly at the other woman before fishing in her bag again. She pulled out a bottle of red wine. "Technically to go with dinner, but if you want to break it open early," she reached back into the bag. "I brought two since I didn't know if Vince and anyone else would be here."

"Ok, marry me." Mia said, giggling. Gem laughed. It was obviously a jest made to illustrate how grateful Mia was to have someone else female around.

"If I'm not married by the time I'm thirty I'm all yours."

"Deal. Ok. I grew up in this house with my dad and brother. My mom died when I was like a year old so I don't remember her at all. My dad was a pro stock car driver-which is where Vince and my brother got into cars from-and he was killed in an accident on the track about five years ago."

"I'm sorry." Gem really was. She couldn't imagine growing up without both a mom and dad since hers had been so active in her life.

"Thanks. When dad died Dom was twenty and I was sixteen. They were going to let me stay with Dom until I was eighteen. My father's accident wasn't as straight forward as he made a mistake or his car had a mechanical issue. Another racer clipped his bumper and sent him into the wall of the racetrack. Dom saw the guy who did it a few days later and beat him half to death."

"Oh my lord." Gem breathed. Mia's life read like a soap opera and Gem had a feeling the tale was only beginning. No wonder the girl gave off an aura of sadness. She had certainly seen enough of it.

"They sent Dominic to jail for two years for it and I had to go stay with a distant relative while he was in. We owned the house and store outright when dad died because he had insurance in the mortgages. Vince looked after the places while we were all away and it wasn't ok but it worked out."

"Then Dom got out of jail."

"Yeah, and I came home and life was good for awhile. Dom didn't only get sent to jail for what he did though. He also got banned off the tracks for life. So much of where we all are today is because of the fact my brother couldn't do the one thing he wanted to do more than anything; race professionally."

"They banned him for life?" Gem asked, almost outraged on this stranger's behalf. "He was only barely more than a kid!"

"I know. I think it was because he was so young, he should have had his whole career ahead of him, that he took it so hard. We've always had a strong underground street racing scene in Los Angeles and when Dom found out about it he started to work on this RX-7 dad bought him to see if he could get it ready for the races. I know Vince got him a lot of the parts hot but the car was crazy fast and Dom started winning at these street races."

"So people take their cars and race down some street someplace?"

"Yes but it's highly organized. You put up money to race and the winner gets all the money that was put in. Dom was a natural. Vince helped him with is car. We had a good time honestly. At least, at first we did." Mia kept working on dinner while she spoke. It was like by keeping her hands busy it let her mind be free to tell the story. "Then Dom started wanting parts-claiming he needed them-that Vince couldn't get him by getting them as they 'fell off the back of a truck'. He needed money for it all, plus the garage was suffering and needed a cash influx for the boys to turn it back around."

"He did something silly for the money didn't he?"

"Yep. He got involved in a business deal with the school rich kid, Johnny Tran. It was always suspected at school that Johnny's father was involved with Asian organized crime but nothing was ever proven. I do know that what Johnny and Dom were up to was not above board but it was getting Dom the money he needed for his car and the shop. Me telling him I thought it was a bad idea didn't deter him at all."

"This Johnny sounds like bad news."

"That's a serious understatement. Business went sour between them for a few reasons, not the least of which was Dom slept with Johnny's little sister."

"Wise." Gem shook her head, starting to like this Dom character less and less.

"Very." Mia replied sarcastically. "So our team and the Trans ended up in something of a feud. We were fine as long as they stayed off our turf and we stayed off theirs but Dom owed Johnny money and he couldn't get out of paying back and he didn't have it. So he mortgaged the house to get it. So then we had the cars to keep up and a mortgage payment to worry about. Not to mention worrying about running a café and a garage. I was in school, premed, but I had to drop out after the events of last summer."

"If you were smart enough to be premed you should go back. There's no way you should let anything stop you. I wish I was smart enough to pull off college but it just wouldn't happen. Besides I guess I taught myself all I need to know about music. But anyway, did you want to tell me what happened last summer?"

"After the thing with Johnny fell through and we still needed money Dom decided we couldn't make enough off the stores. He and Vince cooked up another plan to get the money. It wasn't legal and it backfired on them one day. We have this big thing in the desert every year in the summer called race wars. Jesse was the baby of our team. He threw down the slip to his father's car and lost. Against Johnny. He panicked and ran. Johnny found him later and gunned him down outside the house. He died in my arms on the sidewalk waiting for the ambulance." Mia started to cry.

"He was the baby and just a big kid. He never did anything to anyone and they shot him over a stupid Jetta. The Jetta wasn't worth as much as one of Johnny's outfits but he killed Jesse over it. Over it and the stupid shit with my brother. But neither of them had to pay for it, innocent, sweet Jesse did. He died while I held him and there was nothing I could do!" Mia was inconsolable and Gem got off her stool and rounded the counter, pulling Mia into a hug.

Mia latched on and sobbed on Gem's shoulder. She'd never had a third party she could share her guilt with. Everyone but Vince had abandoned her and even Vince had been laid up in the hospital out of his mind on painkillers and drugs at the time. Then afterward he'd felt guilty enough and had been going through too much on his own for her to burden him further.

"Shush." Gem made unintelligible words of comfort as she just let the obviously grief stricken Mia cry on her shoulder. After a few minutes Mia started to calm down. Gem got her a tissue.

"Thanks. You know I never got to tell anyone that before." Mia sniffled and gave Gem a watery smile. "I think I feel better already."

"I'm not surprised! Holding something like that all bottled up inside for over a year."

"I want to finish the story, if you don't mind." Mia said with resolve. It had to come out. She'd keep the incriminating parts out as much as she could but Vince had no right to ask her to keep all her feelings inside. She'd done it for almost a year and it had almost killed her. "Jesse died. There was an accident. Vince was hurt pretty bad and had to be airlifted to the hospital. That happened before Jesse ever even came back. Dom sent Vince to the hospital all alone and came back here to go looking for Jesse. He never found him. Letty and Leon took off as soon as they left Dom home with his car. I never heard from them again. Dom took off in the end to follow them."

"Why didn't you go with him?"

"He never offered. Never came home to tell me. He just took off. Knowing Dom he thought he was protecting me, like if I didn't know where he was the cops couldn't touch me. Fine, but that doesn't explain why he hasn't found a way to contact us since. He doesn't know Jesse is dead, he doesn't know if Vince lived or not, not unless he found some way to find out without contacting us."

"I," Gem was flabbergasted. "I don't know what to say Mia. I wish I did. I can't imagine how I'd feel if my brother just took off on me one day and never called or wrote or came to visit. Did you ever try to find him?"

"At first I was too angry and later too tired and just done with the world to care to try. Now it's been too long and I'm not sure I want to find him. I don't trust myself around him after all this time. After what he left me and Vince to face alone. Does that make me a horrible person?"

"No. Gosh no. You have every right to be angry about it all." Gem was quick to reassure Mia. They both realized around the same time that Mia had finished assembling the lasagne while she'd finished her tale.

"There's one more piece of the puzzle though. There was a cop sent in under cover to try and figure out who was doing the thing the guys were doing. He hooked up with our team because Dom was the king of the scene. Came to see me every day for three whole weeks and had me make him a tuna sandwich with no crust. Every day. Always wearing these really worn tee shirts and washed out pants. Had this blonde everywhere hair and baby blue eyes. We all thought he was another down on his luck racer working for Harry when he was really a cop trying to bust someone for the thing that was going on." Mia gave Gem an apologetic look for her inability to elaborate beyond the point she was. Gem waved her off.

"I fell for him, hard. Dom even liked him. And then on the night of Race wars when Jesse was out scared and alone and the guys were planning another job he drops the bombshell on me that he was a cop all along. I got some of the details that he's the reason why Dominic is running free somewhere instead of locked up for what he was doing but then I never heard from Brian again. He said what he felt for me was real and that he never lied about his feelings but he just took off. I never heard from him since either."

"You really had the year from hell. I don't know how you did it. I don't know if I could."

"We all cope in our own ways I guess. Vince drinks, all the time." Mia took a deep breath. "And I've been practically starving myself to death. I've lost about twenty pounds and I was always getting flack for being too thin before. That was my coping method but it stops today. Life is going to go on."

"We are so going out for ice cream after dinner." Gem said and slapped the countertop with both hands.

"With hot fudge?"

"And whip cream."

"And sprinkles."

"And extra cherries." Gem finished and both girls laughed.

Mia looked up at the clock and saw it was already four. "Wow. Time flies. This takes about an hour to cook through."

"You made that totally from scratch didn't you?"

"How'd you know?" Mia asked.

"My folks run an Italian restaurant my family owns back in Frisco."

"You don't look Italian."

"We're a little bit of everything." Gem grinned.

"Ok, so do you want your wine chilled?"

"You don't drink cold wine-"

"-with Italian food." Mia finished and the girls shared a giggle.

They chatted about everyday things, likes and dislikes, over the first bottle of wine while the lasagne baked. Gem helped Mia make the salad then they set the table and sat down to eat.

"Do you mind if we say grace?" Mia asked hesitantly.

"Not at all." Gem bowed her head.

"Dear heavenly father, thank you for the many blessings you have given us and thank you for sending Gem to remind me that there are blessings in my life too. Please take care of Jesse and thank you for ball bearing turbos and four core intercoolers. Amen."

Gem gave Mia a strange look over the last part of her grace and Mia explained, sending both of them into wistful giggles. Mia for what she'd lost and Gem for what she'd never had-a close group of friends with a shared interest to grow up with. Mia had lost more than anyone her age ever should but she'd had a lot in her life to be thankful for too. Some things were worth experiencing.

As both woman pushed back from the table the surveyed the damage. "I can't believe we ate so much." Gem said as she looked at the lasagne, which was two thirds gone and the salad, which was demolished.

"I know. I don't know if I can move. But I still want that Sundae." Mia said and Gem groaned.

"By the time we drive someplace to get it I'll be ready too." She admitted with a rueful smile. "I haven't had a home cooked meal since I moved here from home."

"How long have you been living in L.A.?"

"Almost a month now. I still live in this rooming house over in Canoga Park."

"You live in a rooming house?"

"Couldn't afford my own place. Rent's cheap and it's only about 20 minutes from the Cobalt, which is over in Canoga Park as well."

"Vince drives half an hour to go drink in some bar?"

"I guess so. It's a pretty nice bar. Older crowd, mostly independent bands trying to make it, nice laid back atmosphere. I guess I can see why."

"I guess, but it's not like its Cheers or something."

"Can I let you in on a secret?" Gem asked, lowering her voice to a conspiratory level playfully.

"Sure."

"For Vince it sort of is like Cheers. They all know his name, only it's not Vince to them. It's grumpy jerk." Gem winked.

Mia started to laugh and once she got started she couldn't stop. "It sounds so much like what would really happen." She gasped out around her laughter. The sound was so infectious Gem joined her.

"They call him worse but I don't want to repeat it." She laughed. "They all make me wait on him because I've figured out the way to get under his skin is to be nice to him."

Mia wiped some tears off her cheeks as she tried to stop laughing. "Nice to him. Priceless."

Gem suddenly sobered up. "I think Barb, she's the other waitress, is trying to fix me up with him. Every time she calls him 'your mechanic' she gets this look in her eyes."

"You? And Vince?" Mia asked, her laughter stopping too as she cocked her head to the side, a speculative gleam in her eyes. "He has been happier lately."

"Not you too! Please don't start. I don't need a man in my life right now, let alone one with as much baggage as Vince. My grandfather was an alcoholic and I really don't want to see anyone else go through that, and gramps has been sober since I was twelve."

"I'm sorry to hear that. Ok, no more matchmaking dreams on this front. After putting up with Vince for the last year I totally don't know why I ever thought about inflicting him on you. And I wasn't even dating him."

"I like Vince. I'd love to be his friend because I think he needs one-and not the type of friend those guys in his garage are either-but I'm not at a point in my life where I can take on a serious relationship with anyone."

"I surrender. Let's go get those Sundaes. We'll come back, watch 'Under the Tuscan Sun' and drink the rest of the wine. How bout it?"

"Couldn't plan a better evening myself."

Mia picked up her keys and the girls headed out into the evening sun.

"So this is your car huh?" Gem asked as she slid into Mia's baby blue Acura.

"My brother got it for me."

"My brother got the Honda for me too but I think I got the short straw when it comes to whose brother buys a better car."

"Cars were everything to my brother. To most people they're a way to get to work or the store. To Dom they were life. He was a mechanic and a race driver. There was nothing else for him."

"Doug-that's my older brother-is going to law school. My other brother is Nick and he's going through the air force to become a pilot. He says when he's ranked high enough there he's going to take me up in a fighter plane."

"Cool."

It took the girls about an hour to get their treats and get home with them. The poured the rest of the first bottle of wine and popped in the movie. By the time the second movie was over they'd finished the other bottle of wine and were giggling at all the things wrong with Blade.

"She listens to music while hunting Vampires? I want to see one eat her. She's got it coming." Gem giggled.

"You have to admit Ryan Reynolds is hot."

"Yeah, ok, he is. But this is still a stupid movie."

By the time the second movie was over it was after twelve. Both girls were a bit less than sober, each having consumed a bottle of red wine. Suddenly Mia put a hand to her mouth. "Uh oh!"

"What's uh oh?"

"We never got your car so now you can't go home."

"I forgot all about my car but I couldn't drive myself anywhere right now anyway."

"You'll just have to stay here tonight. We'll get your car tomorrow."

"I don't know." Gem was hesitant. "I have nothing to wear to bed and nothing to change into tomorrow."

"I'll find you something." Mia got up on her knees on the couch and looked at Gem pleadingly. "I'll be just like when you were a kid. We'll have a sleepover."

"Ok."

"Great! Come on, I'll find you something to wear to bed and we'll change."

"Mia, I don't think your stuff is going to fit me."

"Yes it will."

But in the end it didn't. Gem tried on Mia's biggest shorts and tank top and still looked poured into them. "It's no good Mia. I look like this is body paint instead of clothes."

"Ok. One second." Mia turned away from the bathroom door and looked at the door to the right of the bathroom door. A door she hadn't opened in almost a year. Taking a deep breath, she prepared to push it open. She knew what she'd see, had an image of it in her mind's eye. It was totally devoid of her brother's presence, and Letty's too. They'd packed up all their stuff into boxes and put them into the closet. It was just another room in the house now, but she and Vince still ignored it.

At first they'd left it just the way Dom and Letty had, like some sort of shrine to them. But as the months had gone by and neither of them had bothered to call or come home the idea of a shrine to them had become obscene. Dom wasn't their god. Not anymore. So why did he deserve a pantheon in his memory? No longer was he the god of the Torettos. Mia had been raised strictly catholic so in her dogma your god didn't abandon you in your time of need. When you were in need was when your god was supposed to pick you up and carry you home.

Packing up their stuff was one of the only things she and Vince had done together. Mia had packed up Letty's stuff and Vince Dominic's. Then Mia washed the curtains and the bed clothes. And finally they'd closed the door. It wasn't like there had been a real point, not after they'd packed up all the personal belongings and washed everything else until not a solitary sign of the lives of their god and goddess had remained in the room. But it was just the principle of the thing. It was still like Dom's room to them. Vince could have moved into it instead of continuing to be a 'cellar dweller' as Mia had always called the boys, but he just couldn't. So the door remained closed.

It was still Dominic's room. It was still Dominic's house. Dominic still ruled their lives. He might be dead, at the very least he just didn't care that they had worried about him for months, but he was still controlling them from no place near them.

It ends now, it ends tonight, Mia said to herself with determination.

She pushed open the door.

Half an hour later both girls were seated downstairs with a big bowl of popcorn between them and a pitcher of frozen margaritas in front of them.

"So where did you find this stuff? Forget you were fat at some point in your life?" Gem asked, looking at the red tank top and men's style boxer shorts she was wearing.

"No, they were Letty's." Mia said and took a huge drink of her frozen drink. "They left so fast they never took any of their stuff. It's all packed away upstairs."

"Is it ok I'm wearing her stuff?" Gem asked, concerned for what seeing her in this Letty's clothes would do to her fragile friend. But now that Gem thought of it, she didn't seem quite so fragile anymore.

"It's been almost a year that she's been gone now. I don't think she's coming back to take exception to it." Mia said with a sneer. "I closed up their room you know. At first we left it all just as they'd left it, but later we decided they weren't coming back and we packed it all up and cleaned up the room like that was going to get their, just their presence out of our lives." Mia shook her head. "It didn't work. The door to the damn room was closed just like while all their stuff was still set out in it because it was still their room. No more. I finally realized for them to be gone from my life I have to let go. Tonight I'm letting go."

"That's good." Gem really didn't know what else to say. She took a drink to cover her awkwardness with the topic.

"You said earlier you wished you could go to college but that you didn't think it could teach you anything about music. Are you a musician?" Mia asked, turning to face Gem, her legs folded under her as she cradled her bowl shaped glass between her hands.

Gem turned to face her in a similar position. "I sing and play bass guitar. I'm starting to write my own songs and compose them too, but I've never been much of a song writer. Honestly I only have one that ever turned out well and I haven't been able to start another one since."

"Vince plays guitar. Or at least he use to."

"Oh boy, he still does." Gem sighed wistfully, wishing she had a tenth of the skill 'her' mechanic did.

"How do you know that?" Mia asked, the devious light from earlier returning to her black eyes.

"He played for me last Thursday at open mic night. I can't play any guitar but bass and he offered to let me use his electric for my song. I told him it was no good because I couldn't play it and I talked him into playing for me."

"On stage?"

"Yep."

"In front of people?" Mia asked in shock.

"Yeah. If I ever write another song I hope he'll play the guitar line for me again. He's pretty good."

"The best." Mia smiled in pride. Gem only fought a blush and lost out.

The girls went to bed around two am. Around two thirty Gem was still up. Mia had put her in Dom's old room, hoping to show herself it was just a room Gem knew. She was slightly uncomfortable over it but figured that it would be good for Mia to see it really was just a room after all.

It was just that Dominic and Letty did seem to be held up to a different standard than everyone else in Mia's life. Her brother had been the ruler of this castle for about twenty four years and no one had an easy time dealing with the fact that the master bedroom was no longer his throne room.

Since she couldn't sleep anyway she got up, crossed the room to her bag and got out her notepad and a pencil. She sat cross legged on what even she thought of as Dominic's bed and looked at her pad.

I'm sitting on a citadel, she thought. This room, this bed, it was the place where the king and queen of this castle lived. The stronghold, the solar, the castle keep. This room was the family citadel.

I'm sitting here wasting my time with my head in the clouds.

Was there a song in that?

"Did you stay up all night?" A deep voice asked from the door.

Gem snapped her head up to look, her mouth forming a startled o of surprise before it turned to a gasp of pain after her neck and back cracked. She saw Vince filling the doorway of the room as he leaned on the frame and she remembered just where she was guiltily.

"I guess I did. First I couldn't sleep then I started writing and I guess I got so engrossed I lost track of time." She looked out the window. "It couldn't have been all night. It's still dark out."

"For about another hour. It's almost five am."

Gem's smile turned sheepish. "I guess I should put this aside and try to get some sleep. If Mia finds out I stayed up all night she'll shoot me."

"I was just going to check on her before I turned in and saw this light on."

Gem watched as Vince's admission made him uncomfortable. She didn't draw attention to it. Clearly he wasn't comfortable with her knowing he worried about Mia enough to want to look in on her. "Ok, if you wouldn't mind shutting the door on your way out I'll try to catch a few hours before Mia wakes up. She talked about a big breakfast complete with pancakes and or French toast."

"Really?" There was a contemplative look on Vince's face that made Gem slightly nervous for some reason. "Ok, 'night."

"Night." Gem answered on a yawn.

Vince left, shutting the door behind him.

Gem woke to the smell of something delicious cooking and fresh coffee brewing. She didn't even take time to change her clothes, just padded to the kitchen in her borrowed shorts and tank. "That smells divine."

"Wondered if you were ever getting up." Mia chided gently, but there was a teasing light in her eyes and a lightness to her step. Vince was noticing it all from his seat at the kitchen table.

"Yeah, she wouldn't feed me until you came down. You don't sleep through the week or something Miss Davis?" There was a devilish look on Vince's face and Gem knew it was because she couldn't deny his claim without admitting she'd stayed up until five the night before.

"I guess it was just the quietness of sleeping in a house with only one other person around instead of twelve others." Gem was slightly self-conscious about her clothing now that she had been reminded of Vince's presence.

"What'd ya mean twelve other people?" Vince asked.

"Gem lives in a rooming house!" Mia said as though the very idea was so scandalous she could barely stand to say it.

"All you told me was you needed to move. Why didn't you tell me you lived in one of those damn places? It's not fuckin safe for you to live there!"

"For crying out loud!" Gem retorted to Vince. "I'm trying to move. I've lived there three weeks without any issues. It's not such a big deal."

"It's a big enough deal that you sure as hell can't live there no more." Vince almost roared back. He took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "Mia, Gem, take seats."

With a look at each other the girls decided it would be easier to listen than to fight with him. They each sat down. "You should not live in a rooming house." Gem opened her mouth to protest his statement but he held up a hand to stop her. "And Mia, you should not live here alone."

"I don't. I live here with you."

"But like you said, I'm never here. That's not gonna change Mia. I got other priorities and that ain't gonna change. But there is a perfect solution to the whole situation."

"There is?" Mia asked, her eyes narrowed.

"Yeah, there is. Gem can move in here, rent Dom's old room for whatever she pays to live at the boarding house. She doesn't have to live there anymore, you can have someone you like to live with and I won't have to feel bad if I don't come around here much."

"That might be the first good idea you had since," Mia thought, "well, I guess first good idea about sums it up."

"I don't know." Gem hedged. "You weren't looking for a roommate."

"I wasn't, but that doesn't mean I wouldn't like one. It would be nice to have another girl around the place. You said it was hard not being able to cook meals or have a bathroom you didn't share with ten other guys."

"I mean, this would be perfect, but I won't do it for what I'm paying to rent a room. That's not fair to you guys." Gem said, sitting back with her arms crossed belligerently. "We need to decide on fair rent."

"You're still only renting a room." Vince jumped in. He was thinking if she had a safe place to live that didn't cost her too much she would be able to afford to replace the Honda sooner than later and he wouldn't have to add worrying about her driving it to his list of other concerns.

"No, I'm getting a room in a house I only have to share with one other person. If I say I'll do it I want to pay my half of the bills."

"Third, technically, since Vince will still crash here at night. His room is in the basement."

"I won't be around much and I have my own bathroom down there. It's like a mini apartment now that I don't share with Leon and," He took a deep breath, "Jesse anymore."

"He eats here sometimes and that's about the extent of how much you'll see him." Mia said. "Oh please do it. Come on! We had such a good time."

"I work funny hours." Gem cautioned. "With what I work and what you said you normally work we won't see each other that much."

"You can come visit me at the café any time you get bored. You could even set up the extra room upstairs for your music."

"You're both sure it won't be an imposition?" Gem sighed, close to capitulating. It solved her housing dilemma neatly, plus she already saw a difference in Mia just from the one night of companionship. It was like having a reason to get up and cook meals was good for her. She wouldn't have to worry about getting normal people to rent from. She already knew how Mia kept house and had seen most of Vince's vices first hand.

"I really wish you'd say yes but I won't make you." Mia said as she got up to finish cooking the breakfast.

"Ok, I'll do it."

Mia squealed before running over to Gem and grabbing her. She almost jumped up and down with glee. Mia knew she had no words to say how grateful she was to end her unasked for stint of isolation from the world.

They moved all of Gem's stuff from her old address to the Toretto residence that afternoon, both Mia and Vince taking the day off work to help. With their three cars it only took one trip as Gem basically only had her clothes and her guitars, having rented her room fully furnished. There were some knickknacks and pictures to take down. The room was left as impersonal as she'd found it when she was done packing. She took one last look around. They moved the boxes containing all the personal possessions Dom and Letty had managed to ecru over their lives together in Dom's room down to the basement and put them in Jesse's old room.

Her room had been like her citadel in L.A. No matter what everyone seemed to think about the safety of rooming houses her room had been the one place she'd felt safe in the strange city up until everyone had started pointing out how unsafe they were.

Her life took on a new routine easily living with Mia. She didn't see too much of her on the Tuesday or Wednesday following her move. Mia worked days at her little groceria and Gem worked nights and slept in until late morning each day. When she woke up she worked on her song a little more, getting the music right to match the words.

Thursday came again and again she was ready but nervous. She was so sure she could convince Vince to play for her again she only brought her bass to work. She even talked Barry into letting her take off to get ready at seven instead of seven thirty. She found Tamica and Elliott already in the green room waiting.

"So you have our music oh great one?" Elliott asked as he pulled Gem into a hug.

"I do. I hope this isn't horrid." Gem answered as she handed over the drum score and piano music to her two friends.

"Where's your mechanic?" Tamica asked.

"Dunno," Gem gave up on protesting Vince wasn't 'her' mechanic. "I only hope he shows up. Otherwise we have no guitar music, just me and my trusty bass."

"Do we get to read the song before we go out there this time? It went over so well last week you can't honestly think you're no good this time, can you?" Elliott asked hopefully.

"No dice. I'm not sharing until I'm singing."

There was a knock at the door. "No one knocks on this door." Tamica muttered, curious.

"Come on in." Gem called. Vince poked his head in. "Um, I was wondering-"

"Yes." Tamica cut him off.

"Yes what?" Vince asked, irritated.

"Yes she wants you to play for her song again." Tamica retorted. Vince walked into the room and sat down in the armchair. Gem handed over the music without a word. It had been strange for her to live with a person who she saw more at work than she ever did at home.

When Mia said she'd only see him for the odd meal around the house she hadn't been kidding. He ate breakfast while Gem was still in bed asleep because despite the fact he was at the Cobalt drinking to some degree every night, staying until the same hour as Gem, he somehow managed to get up every day to be at work for 9am. He ate lunch at his shop most days, Mia said, and so far Gem had joined Mia at the café for lunch each day. Mia said that some days Vince would join them for supper but more often he'd eat over the sink before he went to get ready to go out for the night.

"I don't know how you do it."

"Do what?" Gem answered Vince's question, knowing instinctively he was speaking to her.

"Write for the guitar so well and be so bad at playing it." Vince picked out a few chords of her song as if to illustrate the point.

"I'm a composer. You don't need to know how to play every instrument in the orchestra." Gem shot back defensively.

"She still won't let us read it." Elliott whined.

"What?" Vince looked up in surprise from the page in front of him.

"You heard him." Gem's chin shot into the air. "No one is reading this."

"Again with this whole not letting us see the whole song thing. Gem, what's up with that?" Tamica griped.

"I don't know," Gem blushed. "I just don't think I can go out there and sing about this stuff if other people know what I'm going to say."

"Ok, lay off and learn your music." Vince said gruffly to Elliott and Tamica. They shared a look. Now he's standing up for her? Interesting, Tamica mused.

"Ok then." Elliott drawled and picked his sheet music back up.

Vince watched as Gem paced around the room with her music in her hands, reading it to herself, her lips moving along as she read the words silently. It was a trait he normally hated but found almost endearing when Gem did it with the frightfully nervous look she had on to accompany it.

"If we're going to keep doing this we need a name for ourselves. We can't go out there every week and be Gem and friends. It's not right." Gem said, pausing her pacing and looking around at the various people in the room with her.

"Why isn't it right? You write the songs, you sing them, we just go out and accompany you." Elliott asked.

"It just isn't. We're a band we should have a name for our band."

"It's not necessary." Tamica added.

"Yes it is so just think about it." Gem said before she started pacing again. After a few minutes, just as Vince was about to tell her to sit down before she made him dizzy, she did go sit down and pulled her bass out from under the couch. She got it out of the case and started to pick out a few notes.

Gem didn't know why she was still so nervous. After how well last week had gone she was fairly sure they weren't horrible. She thought-and was in fact fairly confident in fact-it had a lot to do with singing something about the life of a person on stage with her who didn't even know she was singing about him. At least indirectly about him. A lot of it was about her as well.

The call came over the loudspeaker for them to take the stage. Show time, Gem thought with a mental sigh.

They all took their places on the stage, Gem adjusting the microphone to her own height as Vince moved back into the shadows in the rear corner of the stage again and Tamica and Elliot found the seats behind their instruments.

"Please welcome back for their sophomore performance, Gem Davis and her accompanying band." Nalia said into her mic.

Gem laughed. "We promise to have a better name soon. We're working on it."

She's a natural, Vince thought as the audience shared her laugher, their chuckling spreading across their mass like a wave.

"Thanks for having us back again. I gather from the number of faces I see that were present last week too we didn't damage your eardrums irreparably and we will try not to do so this week either. Again, we're doing this in our spare time, we don't get a chance to practise together so forgive any mistakes we might make. This song is called Citadel and I hope you enjoy it." When she was finished speaking she turned back to the rest of her friends. "On three?"

They nodded. "One, two, three."

Vince started to play the guitar at the precise time Elliot started on the drums. The first of the song mostly showcased the two instruments. Gem joined them with the bass line and played a few measures before starting to sing.

"I'm sitting on a citadel, contemplating life, making a point to waste my time. I'm walking on clouds of white."

Her words really didn't make sense to him at first. Sitting on a citadel? What was that supposed to mean? He had a bad feeling he was going to think about it until he asked her about it and had it explained to him. The only part he could make any sense of was the part about the clouds. She did seem to walk around with her head in them often enough for that part to make sense.

"What if I fall? What if I don't? What if I never make it home? What if I bleed? What if I break?"

How many times had he asked himself those same questions? They were feelings that almost everyone in the world could relate to. He hesitated to think it was good but it was reassuring that Gem wasn't as perfectly unaffected by the world as she seemed on the outside. She rarely got mad or raised her voice. She didn't cry or scream. She laughed but most of the time it seemed restrained. She seemed so together that sometimes when he was home around her it almost made him mad because he was so volatile. All Mia had to do was say the wrong thing to him and he was flipping out at her, yelling and cussing. Of course that lead to her crying and calling him down. They'd had two such fights since Gem had come to stay with them. One over his time coming to the Cobalt and one over the fact he still hadn't fixed the things around the house he'd promised to fix

Always in the background, Gem watched with the detached calm look on her face. At least until after he left to 'calm down'. He assumed that Gem picked up the pieces he left Mia in after he was gone because when he came home Mia was always quiet again, yet still mad at him.

"And I find that I can't take, the city below the citadel holding my own. The city below…"

Gem found herself fighting her tears as she sang. She found the 'city below the citadel' almost impossible to take. The way Vince treated Mia half the time made her want to kill him. Couldn't he see Mia couldn't shrug him off or simply turn his bad mood into her own good one and kill him with kindness? She could only fight to keep her face neutral so she didn't seem to be picking sides and retreat to her room, to the house citadel. Had they always fought like they did now? How much of what had occurred last summer had Mia left out of her tale? Most of it, if Gem didn't miss her guess. Like how Jesse had died and why her brother and his friends had run off seemingly forever.

The idea they might return left Gem slightly on edge too. She hated Dominic Toretto and the two people who'd fled with him with a depth of feeling she'd never experienced before. She didn't know the whole story behind what had happened or why he'd left but she hated him anyway. She had never hated anyone in her life but she was sure she hated him. He'd left his little sister all alone with no one but a cranky, cantankerous drunk to care for her. Vince had his own issues and that was the only thing saving him from being filleted alive by the sharpest edge of her tongue.

"And I'm breaking on a balcony. Breaking window panes. I'm killin' the pain of broken hearts. Walking on clouds, walking on stars.

"What if I fall? What if I don't? What if I never make it home? What if I bleed? What if I break? And I find that I can't take…"

What if she fell? What if she was corrupted by the things she sensed Vince was into or had been into. What if she didn't, because the more she thought about it the more she thought perhaps she wanted to be corrupted, perhaps just a little at least? But what if either way the house, the citadel never became her home? What would happen? She might end up broken and hurting over things she had no control over. But perhaps the scariest thought of all was that she'd get her wish, become part of their family, become one of them, like them but that she wouldn't be able to handle what went on in the city below her citadel, in the house she found herself living in.

"The city below the citadel, holding my own. I'm holding on to something, it's keeping me from jumping. I'm so afraid to go it alone. I'm holding up this fortress, with imaginary horses. Longing for a life down below."

She had written the last verse over again only the night before, unable to get it right. What if she did find she couldn't take the life she was signing up for outside of her own room living with Mia? She felt like she was going it alone as the only sane one in her house but she felt herself longing to be one of the insane people. The way Mia and Vince fought made Gem wish she could yell and scream at both of them they were being juvenile. But she didn't yell, or scream. She stayed level headed through it all. She was again brought back to her thoughts that she might become part of their family and find out she couldn't handle the

"What if fall? What if I don't? What if I never make it home? What if I bleed? What if I break, and I find that I can't take…The city below the citadel, holding my own, yeah. The city below the citadel, holding my own, yeah. The city below the citadel, holding my hand."

There was no lingering note at the end of her song this time. The music died with her voice. Another glance at Vince assured her he still didn't seem to suspect a thing. He was unplugging the guitar from the club's amp, seemingly oblivious to the subtle undercurrents of her heartfelt song. She wasn't upset by this, far from it. She didn't know what she'd do if he ever figured it out.

They all walked off the stage after they received their round of applause. One thing was for sure, the audience sure received her songs better than they had her singing other peoples.

They gathered back together in the green room for a moment after the song. Gem saw Tamica first. The dark woman pulled her into a hug. "Girl, keep it up. If you keep pulling this sorta stuff outta your hat you might just have something with this whole band thing."

"I sure hope so." Gem looked around uncertainly. "I think I need to talk to someone about some things. Could we talk later?"

"Later, how later?"

"Later after a certain someone picks up his guitar case and goes to start tying one on."

"Sounds serious."

"You can't have a talk about guys without me." Elliot broke in. "You'll need a male perspective."

"As if you'd count." Tamica teased gently.

The door opened and Gem looked up, hoping it wasn't Vince. Her hope was in vain. "I've got to get back to work. I'll find you on my break, after you play your solo set, ok Tamica."

"Sure G. Find me back here when I'm finished."

Vince looked from one girl to the other. He could tell something was up but he wasn't sure he wanted to know what so he didn't say anything.

With a glance his way Gem escaped from the room, bass nestled in its case clutched to her chest.