The wormhole disengaged and she allowed a smile to slowly spread across her face. She turned and retreated from the gate room, responding with the appropriate nods and smiles to those who greeted her as she traversed the corridors on her way back to her lab. Her smile grew as she neared her door, making a mental list of the few things she needed to take care of before she escaped the base early. After sending a couple of e-mails and shutting down some experiments she was going to leave for an entire weekend at home alone.
The thought of a solitary two days with no one to interrupt the peace and quiet she was planning for herself was such an exciting prospect that she could no longer contain the grin that now took up her entire face. She entered her lab trying to think of various ways in which she could thank Thor and his buddies. A card? A fruit basket, perhaps? Oooooh, maybe mini-muffins, everyone likes mini-muffins, and quite frankly, when your normal diet consisted of brightly colored blocks that looked like something her three-year old nephew would love spending hours stacking together (what were they called again? duplex…no…duplos! Yeah that was it!) and tasted like a combination of burnt cheese, rancid meat, and congealed milk, you'd have to be appreciative of any sort of alternative food offering. Then again, maybe the Asgard liked the way their food tasted. Or maybe they didn't know it was bad. She had never actually seen an Asgard tongue; after all, they might not even have taste buds. But Thor had said he like the yellow ones which, would indicate some sort of ability to distinguish between the pieces of food, unless maybe he just preferred the color…
She continued pondering the apparent color preferences of everyone's favorite little gray man as she packed up her laptop and made her way to the door. Yes, she really would have to find a way to thank Thor. His intervention, albeit unintentional, was the reason for her upcoming carefree weekend. Thor had done what Sam had been unsuccessfully trying to do for two months- get Colonel Jack O'Neill, Dr. Daniel Jackson, and Teal'c off world and away from her.
From the moment they had found out she was pregnant, they had been nothing but "supportive". They catered to her every need, complimented her, indulged her, treated her like a princess. It had been fun, rather flattering, for oh, say, twelve hours. And then her patience had thinned and worn down, amusement turned to exasperation, exasperation turned to annoyance, annoyance to frustration, and frustration into mind-blowing fury. The constant hovering of her teammates, always watching over her, not letting her do anything for herself, preventing her from performing her normal duties, all the while with these sickly sweet expressions and tones of voices that were so patronizing she felt about eight years old.
The three had somehow managed to stay on-world for nearly two months to baby-sit her. The Colonel convinced General Hammond that he just had to be in charge of training new SGC recruits to test out the new entrance trials that were being implemented. Daniel insisted on being the one to oversee the creation of a new artifact cataloguing system, as he was the one who always ended up having to explain the significance of such objects to the higher-ups. And while his fascination with computers had never in the past gone any further than searching the Internet and spamming all SGC personnel with websites containing dancing hamsters and the like, Teal'c suddenly had a great interest in contributing his knowledge of the Goa'uld to the base's new software program designed for creating virtual reality simulations of Goa'uld technology. Thus, they were always with her. And there was absolutely nothing she could do about it.
Until the glorious day when Thor again appeared out of nowhere in the briefing room, requesting SG-1's presence for some highly important matter. The Colonel had argued, raged, begged, pleaded, and cajoled the General to excuse his presence from the mission but to no avail. If the High Commander of a race that had the ability to pop in and out of Earth's most top secret underground military facility whenever he damn well pleased wanted SG-1, then he was going to get as much of the team as possible. Jack had gone as far as to threaten quitting until the General reminded him of the rising costs of college tuition and if he wanted to be able to put his unborn child through school then he'd better say "Yes, sir" and gear up. Daniel's puppy-dog eyes were useless on the General, who had learned long ago to combat them when they came from his granddaughters, lest he find himself sitting with his chin practically on his knees in a tiny pink chair, with and purple hat on his shiny head while sipping imaginary tea from a chipped plastic cup. Teal'c did not argue but glared at the General, fixing him with a gaze usually reserved for those inhabited by parasitic snakes.
In the end, the three agreed to go as long as Sam promised not to work while they were off world. Hence, her weekend off. She hadn't even argued, knowing that this was exactly what she needed, time away from the watchful eyes of the guys and pretty much everyone on base. As she exited her lab and turned to lock the door, she allowed herself a little squeal of excitement, figuring if anyone heard, well, she was pregnant, she could blame it on a hormonal imbalance.
"Major Carter? Are you okay?"
Damn. No one was actually supposed to have heard. She turned and looked sheepishly at the concerned faces of Sergeants Harriman and Siler. "I'm doing great, actually," she replied. Their faces visibly relaxed at her response and she continued with her explanation, "I'm just leaving early for the weekend and am excited, that's all."
"Excited?" Siler pried further. "Big plans?" his asked, brow furrowing as though the thought of Major Carter doing anything this weekend was a problem.
"No, nothing big," she assured him. "I'm just going to enjoy a nice quiet relaxing weekend at home. But don't worry I will be just a phone call away if anything comes up that needs my help, okay?" she added, assuming his apparent apprehension resulted from the possibility of her being out of contact for a few days. Her conjecture was confirmed as the sergeants exchanged relieved glances.
"Well, okay then, have a good weekend, Ma'am," Harriman said.
"Thank you," Sam replied as she continued down the corridor. "I will see you both on Monday," she finished, shaking her head in amusement. Sometimes it seriously felt like the base would fall apart if she left for a few days. Well, let it fall apart. She was taking this weekend off!
By Sunday morning, Sam was bored. Friday night had been great; she'd curled up on the couch with a trashy paperback and a large mug of hot chocolate. Saturday had been spent shopping, baking some cookies, fooling around on her laptop for awhile, and spending the evening with a large bowl of popcorn and a few chick flicks. However, by Sunday morning, she was itching to get back to the base, and toy with her experiments. "No," she chastised herself, "I said I was taking a weekend off, and I am going to take the weekend off." Realizing she needed to relieve the excess energy that had built up over the past twenty-four hours she decided to go for a run. While she would cut back the normal five mile route she did while on downtime before she was pregnant, she figured a solid two and a half miles would tire her enough to keep her comfortably at home for the rest of the day. As she stepped out the door and breathed the late morning air, she decided that this was an excellent idea.
However, about a mile into her run she began to feel slightly unnerved. Almost the whole time since she had left her block, she had felt the tingly sensation of someone watching her. Twice she had glanced over her shoulder, once catching the sudden rustling of bushes. She had convinced herself it was a neighborhood cat or squirrel and kept going, but the tingling sensation remained. She brushed it off as paranoia until she noticed the white nondescript government-issue van traverse the cross-street in front of her.
Completely on guard now, she quickened her pace slightly and glanced surreptitiously about her surroundings. As she crossed the next street, she looked to her right and saw the same van approaching. "Shit," she thought, not knowing who they were, but understanding that she and her baby were in danger. There were various government agencies and private companies that would love to get their hands on her, especially now that she was pregnant.
"Shit, shit, shit." She repeated the curse in her head, scanning the area for options. It was a quiet residential neighborhood with the houses placed fairly distant from one another, a prospect she and Jack had found appealing when looking into buying a house. With their unusual occupations, the farther away from prying eyes, the better. Being Sunday morning, no one was out on the street and Sam racked her brain trying to remember if there was a store or gas station nearby she could make it to in order to find help.
She picked up the pace, almost sprinting now, and glanced behind her to see that the van had turned on to the same street she was running on, and had increased its speed to match hers. To her left, bushes began shaking and rustling; something much larger than a cat was obviously hidden within. Refusing to panic, Sam glanced desperately around one last time and saw it - on her right a wall had appeared, encompassing a local farm. It was about fifty yards off the road, and she knew if she could just make a break for it and hop the wall, she could evade the car and then deal with the individuals on the ground.
Gathering her last vestiges of strength and adrenaline, Sam broke abruptly to the right and made a beeline for the wall. She heard the bushes crash behind her and the van's tires squeal as it suddenly sped to catch up. She had about reached the wall when she realized that no one was chasing after her. She turned and saw the van screech to a stop and a figure jump out the diver side door and point something at the two figures that had come tumbling out of the brush.
Sam stood stunned as she heard one of the masked bush-men shout rather uncertainly, "You hurt her and I'll…uh …kill you?"
The other bush-man jabbed his compatriot in the ribs with his elbow and asserted with attempted bravado, "Yeah I've got a zat and I know how to use it!" He pulled the already disclosed weapon from its holster and pointed it at the masked man, who had gotten out of the truck.
The man from the truck seemed to pause in confusion almost, before replying, "Well I've got a tranquilizer gun and I'm not going to let you hurt her!"
The weapons remained raised and pointed towards their targets as Sam approached the scene.
"Major Carter, stay where you are, I've got everything under control!" squeaked the man from the van, sounding not at all like he could control a cocker-spaniel, much less a potential shoot out.
However, his high-pitched declaration had been all too recognizable to Sam. Realization began to dawn on her as she marched forcefully towards the one holding the tranquilizer gun.
"No, Major Carter!" the other two shouted in unison.
Ignoring their pleas, she swiftly yanked the mask off the head of the man from the van and then crossed to the other two and pulled off their masks. She returned to the middle point between the two sides, crossed her arms over her chest and directed her best patented officer's glare at both parties.
"Dr. Felger?" the two men covered in leaves and twigs said incredulously.
"Sergeant Harriman? Siler?" Jay Felger replied, just as shocked.
"We saw the van-"
"I was watching the bushes-"
"We thought you were-"
"I thought you-"
"Enough!" exclaimed the fed up major. "I sincerely hope that this morning we received intelligence that a death threat was directed at me, or the Goa'uld-du-jour is approaching with a hand device that has my name on it, or you are all going to be in a world of trouble!"
Felger found the ability to speak first. "It wasn't my idea Major. Before Dr. Jackson left he said he was counting on me to watch out for you in his absence, and if anything happened, well, he didn't really say what he'd do, but he implied that my job wouldn't be the only thing I would lose, and well, ever since he descended he's gotten all…muscle-y and, well, scary and I just-"
Sam held up her hand motioning for his silence. She turned to the dirt-covered sergeants and raised an eyebrow. "I assume the Colonel made it an order for the two of you?"
The sergeants nodded miserably.
"At least Teal'c had the decency-" she began, more to herself than to the three dimwits in front of her.
"Actually," Siler interrupted apprehensively, "the Colonel brought Teal'c along when he, um, informed us of our mission. He didn't really say anything he just sort of, loomed…" Siler trailed off as he noticed that Sam's lips had all but disappeared as she pressed them tightly together.
"So let me get this straight - you were instructed by various members of SG-1 to look out for me while they were off-world, and you decided following me on a Sunday morning, armed with alien weapons and government firearms was the way to do it?"
"Actually we've been camped on the hill behind your house since Friday night, right after you told us you were leaving early…" Harriman explained in a voice barely above a whisper. Siler glared at him and he responded, "What? She would have figured it out anyways…"
Sam closed her eyes as she replayed the conversation from Friday in her head, realizing her error in the assumption that the sergeants were worried about how the base would fare without her. They were just concerned about how it would affect their standing orders from her soon to be ex-husband!
She fixed Felger with a stare. "Um, since Saturday morning," the Doctor replied dubiously. "I must say, though, that blouse you purchased was an excellent shade, it will go beautifully with-" he began hopefully, looking to get back into her good graces through flattery. He stopped short when he saw the actual steam begin to billow from her ears.
"I suggest the three of you return everything you apparently 'borrowed' from the base before somebody discovers its missing and the three of you get in more trouble. Because I certainly won't back up your story. In fact, should anyone ask, I saw the three of you sneak off into the night carrying government labeled crates, and I recommend your permanent removal to Leavenworth! And I don't care if you're not military!" She all but shouted the last bit at Felger, who had opened his mouth to protest. With that she turned and began the mile walk back home, trying to come up with various ways to torture her teammates upon their return. She knew Jack wasn't being allowed back in the house for at least a few days…
"I guess we probably shouldn't tell her that General Hammond authorized the use of base supplies…" she heard Harriman whisper to Siler, assuming she was too far to hear.
It was going to be a long seven months.