'These dreams go on when I close my eyes, every second of the night, I live another life ...'
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In case you hadn't figured yet, the first chapter was Kara's POV, the second Lee's. This chapter swings back and forth - separated by OoOoOoOo. Hopefully it should all make sense. Let me know if it doesn't. Thanks."You know we can't," Kara said, looking up at him through half-closed lids.
"I know, but I hate all this sneaking around, pretending it isn't happening." His fingers fanned her hair out across his lap as it shone like gold in the hazy sunlight. "I want to be able to go places with you and announce to the world that you're mine and I'm yours."
Kara's hand crept up over his leg, twining her fingers in his. "I know, I do too, but you know what people will say about us. You know what will happen to me if they find out." She closed her eyes. "I love this job Zack, it's perfect for me. It's everything I've ever wanted but never dreamed I could actually have." Green eyes suddenly stared up at him, begging, pleading. "I don't want to lose it. I can't lose it."
"I know sweetheart." Zack's other hand caressed her face. "I can wait until the class is over and I've graduated. As long as I know I have you, that's all that matters." He smiled and Kara's heart melted. Those blue eyes ... so very, very blue ... and that smiling mouth ... lips just begging to be kissed ...
She leaned up on her elbows and put those beautiful lips out of their misery. The warmth that flooded to the core of her very being had nothing to do with the late summer sun. Zack loved her - but even more, he understood her. He knew what made her tick, and he respected it. He was willing to put his own wants aside in order to make sure she was happy. He was the first person ever to do that, and it made Kara giddy. She felt like her heart would burst she was so happy.
"Kara, Kara, Kara ..." Zack chanted softly, fingers tracing over her swollen lips ...
"Kara! What the hell is going on? Answer me please!"
She became vaguely aware that the grass and trees had disappeared. The sun too , was gone, taking it's warmth away and leaving her shivering in the darkness.
"Frak! Starbuck, pull up! Pull up dammit!" The voice was familiar sounding, but it was full of panic. Her eyes wrinkled. Why would someone be in a panic? What could possibly be ...
"Kara!" the voice screamed. "Pull up or you're going to crash!" Suddenly it all came to her. Lee! Lee was yelling at her - Lee was telling her she was going to crash!
She shook her head and the reality of the situation hit her instantly. She was going to crash. Her hand flew immediately down to the joystick, leaving her lips behind. She yanked it furiously backwards and felt the familiar pounding sensation as her ship pulled seven G's.
"Gods no Kara! Don't die on me!" Lee yelled, a split second before her ship changed trajectory suddenly.
Her head hit the back of her seat and the wind was knocked out of her lungs briefly, but she barely missed the ship she'd been aiming at. Holy frak, that was close, she thought, taking a deep, shuddering breath.
"Kara, what the hell happened?" Lee's voice was softer now, but she could hear the fear in it plain as the August day that had been warming her not a minute earlier. "Are you okay?"
"I'm fine," she said, knowing she didn't sound it. "Let's go home Apollo."
"You won't get any argument from me. Hot Dog, Apollo. Take the CAP back out on it's rotation. I've got Starbuck."
"Aye aye sir. Galactica, Hot Dog. Resuming CAP. Come on guys, let's go." Three vipers peeled off and headed back towards the Libran Moon, continuing where they'd left when the emergency call had come through.
The Blackbird and Mark VII flew side by side - so close they could almost see into each other's cockpits. But they flew in silence - uncharacteristic for them. Kara knew Lee was upset; he had every right to be. She'd be upset if the situation were reversed. But she knew he'd want answers and she had none to give him. Frak, even she had no idea what was happening to her.
OoOoOoOoOoOoOoo
Lee flew silently beside Kara, wondering what had gone wrong, why, and how could he possibly have lived with himself if she had crashed. He'd noticed she'd been a little different lately - more aloof, but until yesterday, he'd ignored it. She was moody - that was a fact the entire crew was all too well aware of - so he hadn't really thought much of it. But after seeing the look in her eyes, he knew. She was hiding something.
But what? Did she have a death wish? Was that why she almost crashed? Did she want out of the relationship but was too afraid to tell him? Had the stress of their lives finally gotten to her and she'd gone round the bend?
He didn't know. The one thing he did know what that he had to talk to her - and make her talk back - and find out what was wrong. If not, it could kill both of them next time.
As they approached Galactica, Lee called in. "Galactica, Apollo. Starbuck and I are ready to come home."
"Apollo, Galactica. You're both cleared to land in the port hangar." As if he needed to hear that. The starboard hangar had all but been destroyed in the last battle and wouldn't be ready for use for weeks yet. But procedure was procedure, and so Dee (or whoever was at the comm) had to tell everyone which bay to land in.
"You want to go first Starbuck?" he offered.
"Sure thing," she replied, but Lee could hear the uncertainty in her voice. This was not his Starbuck. Something was very definitely wrong.
OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo
Kara was still very shaken. She sat in her cockpit for a moment before opening it up and facing the music. Lee and his father stood at the bottom of the stairs waiting for her, matching anxious expressions on their faces. What the hell am I going to tell them? she wondered.
"What the hell were you doing, were you trying to get yourself killed?" Kara knew it was Lee's fear talking, but his accusatory tone played havoc with her already frayed nerves. She stood on the bottom step, feet refusing to take her further.
"Are you crazy?" Lee spat out, stepping forward to grab her, but Adama's hand came down like a vice grip on his shoulder. Kara could see the whiteness of his knuckles as he struggled to hold his son back.
"Let me," he said gently. Lee let out an angry puff of air, but obviously stopped struggling.
Adama stepped forward and held out his hand to her. "Come on Kara, you're safe now. You're home." Strength flowed into her from his reassuring tone. She put out her hand tentatively and placed it in his. His hand closed over hers and it warmed her like the August sun. She stepped forward hesitantly and he enclosed her in a tight bear hug. Kara closed her eyes and hugged back, a few tears squeezing out the corners of her eyes. They held each other for a long moment.
"What happened out there Kara?" he asked softly. "Tell me."
They broke apart and Kara blinked back tears. "I don't know - I just blacked out or something. One minute I was flying home and the next Lee was screaming at me to pull up."
"We'd best get the doc to take a look at you then, and figure out what happened." She nodded slowly. "Has this happened before?" Kara shook her head, but she knew Lee could read her like a book. He wouldn't be fooled. She stepped towards him.
"Lee," she said faintly, tears filling her eyes again. This time it was he who pulled her into a hug, burying his face in her hair. She held him tightly, crushing his body against hers. "Thank you for saving me," she whispered.
Lee pulled his head back to look her in the eye. "Just don't do it again, please?" he asked quietly.
"Come on, let's get you to lifestation. After the doc takes a look at you, we need to talk about what you saw out there."
OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo
Lee held Kara's hand as they walked down Galactica's corridors. Frak the rules, he thought, I've just about lost the woman I love - I'm not letting her go now! Kara squeezed his hand, as if reading his mind.
His father explained the situation to Doc Cottle when they arrived, and was then told to continue with his duties. As was Lee.
"Don't worry - I'll take good care of her. Got a few tests to run then I'll send her back to you." Cottle puffed on his cigar. "Scoot," he said finally, impeccable bedside manner as always.
"See you soon Starbuck," Adama said, touching her hand briefly. "Captain."
Lee and his father walked the halls back to CIC, not talking. Suddenly Lee's arm was grabbed and Adama stopped him in his tracks. "What's wrong with her?" His eyes felt like they were penetrating Lee's very soul. He shrugged.
"I don't know," he said honestly. "She's been acting a little ... different lately. Last few days or so, but she hasn't said anything. I thought she was just moody ... you know PMS or something so I didn't ask."
"Obviously there's something serious going on. Unless the doc can come up with a reasonable explanation and a way to fix it, she's grounded. I don't want this happening again." His voice was charged with emotion. He may never have told Lee he loved Kara, but he didn't have to. Lee knew.
He nodded. "I'm with you."
"Let's get ready to put that plan of your in action. I have a hunch Starbuck's not going to have good news for us."
"It'll need a little modifying - I was counting on having her with us."
"Do what you have to. She won't be flying today, I can guarantee that." They resumed walking.
"You know she'll fight tooth and nail to go."
"I can handle it." Adama smiled briefly. "I've been dealing with her longer than you have Lee."
Lee nodded, a smirk crossing his face. "Yeah, I guess you have."
"And I'm still here to tell about it," Adama quipped as they turned the corner and headed straight for the war table to plan their attack.
OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo
Kara walked impatiently down to CIC, frustrated by the lengthy delay in lifestation. She had loads of important information for them, all of it not good, but necessary in order to ensure their survival. It was vitally important that she get it to them as quickly as possible in order for Lee to put his plan into action.
She knew the Commander wouldn't let her go on the mission, but she didn't intend to take no for an answer. She was fit, able to fly and there was no reason for her to stay back. He couldn't afford to have his best pilot (Lee would argue that!) sitting around when there was work to be done.
Meanwhile back at lifestation, Cottle surveyed the results of the blood test.
"Well I'll be frakked. I don't believe it. Starbuck ... of all people ..." The cigar dropped from his mouth. "No one's going to be happy to hear about this," he said to himself, leaning over with a groan to pick his cigar up off the floor. "The gods help us all."
'... every moment I'm awake, the further I'm away ...'
(Heart - These Dreams)