Touched By An Ancient

By Ann3

Writer's note: Just the one chapter to come today, and one that links to the backstory I gave Carson in Hope ReBorn. It goes, I hope, a little further in explaining why he has such a deep fear of the Ancient technology, and why he not only became a doctor but also chose to specialise in genetic research. Hopefully, Tierney, it'll answer your question from your last review... ;o)

There's a reference to one of my favourite scenes from Rising in this chapter, but everything else is still the same.

So on we go - and for all those who just love their Becketts, here you get two for the price of one ! Enjoy !

Chapter 13

"I – I need to sit down…"

"Ye are sitting down, son…"

He was, too, but he was still too groggy, too fresh out of his faint, to remember how he'd got there – prompting a quiet chuckle of laughter, another gentle warning for their other hillside companions.

"There's still an awfu' lot o' sheep around, son…"

Glassy blue eyes suddenly regained their focus. The famous Beckett sarcasm regained its voice.

"Bugger the sheep, dad…! With what you've just told me, I need a bloody stiff drink…!"

"Aye, lad… yes, I imagine ye do… and a wee bite tae go with it, no doubt…"

Moments later, to Carson's fresh astonishment, a small glass appeared in one hand, while beside him – well, once he got back, he'd enjoy a smugly gleeful 'one up on you, son…' chat with a certain colonel.

Hungrily studying one of the biggest turkey sandwiches he'd ever seen, he then grew more serious – thoughts of home, his re-woken yearning to return there, causing his appetite to suddenly desert him. Instead Carson turned his head skywards once more, to the Pap of Glencoe's towering summit.

His gateway back to the real world, his real home, was still there. Still reassuringly waiting for him. It was all part of this incredible journey, he supposed, that he should be working so hard to reach it. And it was so close now, so tantalisingly close. In fact, if he reached out, his fingers could just…

…close around yet another handful of fresh and sweetly heathery but still frustratingly empty air.

Dropping that hand back into his lap, Carson sighed while glancing self-consciously sideways – managing a trace of an appreciative smile for his father's consoling pat on his shoulder.

"I know, son… aye, I know it must be frustrating for ye, to be so close to home, but still so far. God knows, I felt the same way. But your journey's almost done, Carsie. You're almost home…"

Already thinking ahead, to a part of that journey's conclusionhe was silently dreading, Carson just nodded – forcing his mind back to deal with a discovery, a revelation which, literally, had driven him to drink.

He'd long suspected that his father's frequent 'holidays' from home hadn't always been truthfully explained. A unique bond between them, one which, only now, he fully understood, had told him that. And with what Carson had seen over the past four years, along with his father's own medical brilliance, it hadn't surprised him to learn that he'd not been the first Dr Beckett to be headhunted by the SGC.

That brilliance hadn't saved Alex Beckett, though, from a freakish mutation of the Ancient gene within him. Not even the SGC's incredible resources had been able to reverse the cancer which had ravaged his body with such brutal speed. It had taken his son's fury at his death, his own natural desperation not to suffer the same fate, to find the cure that would safeguard not only his life, but also that of an entire generation.

Finding all this out while journeying through his Ascended subconscious had shocked him enough, turning his entire world, Ascended or otherwise, completely on its head. Finding out, too, that a lifetime of anger had no justified cause… well, it took some getting used to.

He'd just downed a straight shot of Glenfiddich, and he still couldn't believe what he'd just heard. On the verge of holding out his glass for a refill, Carson then sheepishly thought better of it. At this rate, he'd be so tipsy by the time he returned to Atlantis that he'd tap dance into the Gate Room

When he finally spoke, though, his stunned, still disbelieving voice was one hundred percent sober.

"And – And you still took the mission…? Even though you knew about the cancer…? You – You knew that continuing to use the Ancient technology would – would make it irreversible…? And – And you still did it anyway…?"

"Aye, lad…" his father nodded, sadness and regret etched in his eyes as they met those of his son. "I'm just sorry it was so hard on ye, son… and on your mother, too, but… well, I had nae choice. I had to do whatever it took, to keep ye both safe… and just hope that in time ye'd understand…"

After all the tears and outbursts of anger, a stricken nod told him that understanding had finally come – prompting another gentle statement to release the vital process of healing which had to come with it.

"Ye can understand it now, son. You're a father yoursel' now, with your own family to protect…"

He'd spoken quietly, looking directly into his son's eyes without a trace of anger or criticism. Yet those words, however gentle, still shook Carson's heart with the force of their significance.

Yes, he'd understood. He'd understood, with breathtaking clarity, every word that his father had said. For the first time in his life, Carson understood the sacrifice he'd so selflessly, and willingly, made.

So much more needed to be said. A tide of pure, unstoppable emotion stopped him from doing so. All he could manage was another helpless, stricken nod before that tide rushed in to overwhelm him. Yet even as he gently pulled his distraught son into his arms, Alex Beckett was smiling. He knew the fear and anger which had haunted his mind for so long was finally loosening its grip.

Not that Carson could appreciate this vital moment of healing. He was in no fit state to even try.

Unseen by tear-filled eyes, another pivotal stage on this incredible journey was also passing unnoticed. Set against the horizon above them, another chevron on his gateway home had flickered into life.

"Aye, son, now ye understand…" his father said at last, soothingly stroking the back of his head. "Aye, now ye understand…"