A/N- a very long and (I think) tear-jerking epilogue for you guys. If you're one to cry in sappy films or don't like dark(ish) thoughts, I suggest you don't read this. Just view the previous chapter as the last chapter and imagine it as a happy ending (even though this is a happy ending)

'Now in life there's gonna be times
When you're feeling low
And in your mind insecurities seem to take control
We start to look outside ourselves
For acceptance and approval
We keep forgetting that the one thing we should know is

Don't be scared
To fly alone
Find a path that is your own
Love will open every door

See in your hands the world is yours
Don't hold back and always know
All the answers you will unfold
What are you waiting for
Spread your wings and soar!' Soar, Christina Aguilera

Hilary POV/My POV (your choice on who you want to think it is)

I don't know how to describe how I feel…

But I never knew how to describe how I felt before, so why should it be any different?

Well, I'll tell you why it's different… because I know that there are people out there who care… who care about me… I know that I feel better… I know I look better…

Heh, now I know what they mean when they say, 'If you feel good, you look good'… definitely describes me. Now, I may not feel 100 perfect, but I guess I do feel better about myself…

I look back on how I was… last year and previous… I feel stupid about how I acted. I wonder, 'why did I do that? Wouldn't it have been so much better to do that or that?'

But, I guess that all things happen for a purpose, don't they? Those sisters called destiny and fate that bind us to those we were born to be with…I guess you can say that they decide our soul mates… and I think I've found mine…

It's been a year now… a tough year full of mental bumps and bruises, trying to overcome my 'problem'; heh, except I get touchy when people call it a 'problem'. It ain't a problem! It's not a 'disorder' (only in scientific books, if ya wanna get technical). It's just another obstacle that life threw at me to overcome. But sometimes I think, 'Why me?'… but then, sometimes, I'm glad it was me, for some wacky reason. Because I was able to overcome it and I'm not sure if anyone else could do it if they were in my shoes. It makes me smile for another wacky reason…

But then… then I just wish that Sarah hadn't have been cursed, by the Sisters, with what she got. Her parents hated her, so did her brother… everything just ganged up on her and… and… it just makes me so angry inside. But I know that I can't change the past, so I have to look to the future.

I remember something… that day under the crying tree… Sarah said to me, '"Yeah, I do wish I was beautiful… have the perfect boyfriend… not necessarily the hottest and buffest on the block, but… he'd have a nice personality… he'd be really kind and thoughtful… looking after me and all… maybe one of those mysterious types, ya know?"' then she had said, '"You'll remember me and live a happy life for me?"'… that I have, Sarah. And those words you said? To live life for you? I took that to my heart and I found your perfect boy.

Okay, so now that he's with me, I think I've softened him up like a marshmallow by the fire, but he is kinda mysterious… in a way… and I can trust him… he has a nice personality, like you wanted, and… well, I missed out your 'not the buffest on the block' because, well, he is buff. Half a million girls are after him! Maybe even more!

Heh, talking to myself again…

But it didn't go all smooth sailing… even before that party, I had continued to… er… self-harm, though I don't like to admit it. But after everytime, I'd go running to him. Hehe, makes me sound weak, does it not? Well, I admit that during that time I was so weak it was untrue. But he understood; always understood. He didn't rush me in trying to overcome my obstacle but he prodded me to get over it; and that I thank him for; I'm glad he was/is understanding.

But now, weighing a total of 7 stone, I feel much better. You may think, '7 stone? Bloody hell, give that girl 5 big Macs a day to fatten her up!' (Please don't do that! I can just about eat one big Mac!) but I have a small stomach and a fast metabolism rate; way too quick. But it's who I am, ya know? If I didn't have this tiny stomach that I can only fit a small amount in at a time, I wouldn't be the girl who ate little but was healthy (after what I had been through, anyway) to my friends, would I? And I know that a few friends… when I wear… argh, it's hard to explain… But, I don't purposely wear tight tops, though when I do, my friends go 'oh my god, you're so fucking skinny! I wish I were you!'. Damn, sometimes I feel like saying, 'Fuck off, no you don't!' but, alas, I can't… for those friends do not know.

Actually, only a few close friends know. And I mean, they are close. To be precise, out of my gang of twenty-plus friends… three know. It's not that I feel ashamed (though I do a little bit…) it's just down to the fact that if I let it slip to those other friends, the whole fucking world would know in… 0.1 seconds flat. Trust me…

I mean, I'd love to just get on with my life and… and not live like any day, everyone would turn their backs on me for being anorexic (heh, that's a bit exaggerated, but ya know. No one would turn their backs on me unless they had no heart or conscious;I tend to hunt people who hurt me and others with their ways...)

The only thing I can think of for the reason me getting over my anorexia is… friendship and love (okay, that's two). But… just because you're not anorexic, doesn't mean love can't help you! And I use the word 'love' in a broad way; parent love, sibling love (I don't care if your brother/sister is as annoying as hell), friendship love and… well, love-love. It can help. Just the thought of the fact that…

Jeez…

Say you felt like dying- killing yourself. What- how do you think the people you left behind would react? The way I feel… the way I view suicide is that it's just the easy way out and the most distressing way out. No, I don't view it as a coward's way… just hard. I mean, one mistake and 'woosh'… you're gone. Never to return (unless you believe in re-incarnation…). I never actually considered suicide during that time; nope. Sure, it occurred to me, but I'd never do it. why? I have no fucking clue…

These are my views and I stick by them till the end… my natural end… with him and my friends by my side. I'm glad that I didn't do anything drastic… I don't wanna be forgotten after a while or-or just remembered at my school as 'The girl who killed herself cos she thought that no one loved her' I wanna be 'hey, that's the girl who got over anorexia and look at her! She's standing proud!'… and I guess that's what's happening now. There's one friend out there (I shan't mention her name, but I'll give ya a clue, if ya reading: you like the name 'Marina') that I bet will stick by me no matter what…

Jeez, sorry, off track. But in short… just what I've droned on about in the past 3 pages in a nutshell…

I've gotten over this. I have a life. A boyfriend who loves me for who I am. Friends who love me for who I am… you could say that this is a fairy tale ending…

Remember: It's not the people you cheer up that matter; it's the people who cheer you up at the end of the day that matter…