Touched By An Ancient

By Ann3

Writer's Note: Another slightly longer chapter this time, setting the scene, I hope, for the end of the story.

Speaking of which, and in answer to victoriaely's question, I think I said a few chapters back that there were another nine to come at that point. Blame the plot bunny, but I'm getting the feeling that could change...! So let's just say I'll follow the lead of another type of bunny, and just keep going... and going... :o)

Seriously, thanks so much for the continued support, it's been much appreciated ! And for anyone who thought our Carson was, perhaps, making too good a recovery from his experience... well, let's just say there's more than one storm brewing in this chapter... ;o)

Chapter Twenty Eight

Even as the rest of Atlantis slept through a pre-dawn storm, Elizabeth knew where she'd find him. Her CMO, she dryly reflected, was nothing if not predictable, especially when he had a lot on his mind.

Sure enough, there he was, enjoying a quiet breakfast at one of the Commissary's sheltered tables.

A few other early risers who'd had the same idea were still greeted with the usual, friendly smile. But to those who knew him that little bit better, who could read his face just that little more astutely – oh yes, Elizabeth mused, still quietly watching him, Carson Beckett, MD, was not a happy doctor.

It was inevitable, really, that the incredible events of the last two weeks had finally caught up with him. His seemingly untroubled recovery had, she realised, lulled them all into a false sense of security. In the shared relief of that recovery, the change in Carson's mood had escaped even the sharpest eyes.

For the last two days, though, his increasingly subdued quietness had set alarm bells ringing. The playful banter, most markedly between him and McKay, had come to a worrying halt. There was an awkwardness around them, a simmering tension, which hadn't been there before.

As its cause continued to evade them, someone else was going to have to identify it instead. More to the point, that someone was going to have to find a way to bring both back on an even keel. And they were going to have to draw on all their skills, both as a diplomat and a leader, to pull it off.

She'd tackle McKay later, once she had a sustaining breakfast inside her, but in the meantime – well, while she had her CMO on his own like this, with conveniently few people around…

"Carson, good morning… do you mind if I join you…?"

Guilt flickered through her for a moment, that she'd startled him so suddenly out of his thoughts – relief thankfully following on behind as, recovering himself, Carson dredged up a sheepish grin.

"Aye, lass… um… of course… here, let me… um… let me get that for you…"

The sight of him hastily making room for her tray on the table was a charmingly encouraging sign. So was the slight easing of his smile as she sat down, betraying his silent relief for her company. That, at least, gave her something to work on as, smiling back at him, she nodded towards his tray.

"A fine traditional Scottish breakfast, I see… just what you need on a cold wet morning like this…"

Puzzled blue eyes blinked at her for a moment, before dropping to study the bowl in front of them.

"Aye…" Carson said at last, passing his spoon in listless circles through a heap of cooling porridge.

Okay, so maybe not the most promising of responses, but Elizabeth knew better than to push him. For all his cheerily friendly nature, you backed Carson Beckett into a corner at your foolish peril. So instead Elizabeth just waited, sipping her coffee, until his eyes flicked hesitantly upwards again – the bewildered disappointment within them echoed through a voice that was still tellingly subdued.

"I – I think Rodney's still mad at me, for… for what happened with the Chair…"

Even as she welcomed this typical openness from him, Elizabeth couldn't hide her puzzled surprise. As far as she was concerned, a still nigglingly guilty conscience was affecting the wrong doctor.

"He is…?" she said at last, deciding, for now at least, that the best thing she could do was play dumb. A surprising number of tricky situations, she dryly reflected, had still been resolved that way.

Staring out at the ocean, Carson just nodded this time before, sighing, he shrugged his shoulders.

"I must admit, Elizabeth, I can see his point…" he said at last, giving his porridge another listless prod. "I – I mean, I know it worked out okay, in the end, but… it was still a bloody reckless thing to do…"

Carson then shook his head, his reticence of just moments before now swinging to the other extreme – his next words tumbling over themselves, in a pure rush of release, as he stirred six bells out of his tea.

"I – I mean, I knew I'd be okay, I knew no harm would come to me, but what about Rodney…? All the time I had that power going through my head, Elizabeth, he was right there with me, and… damn it, no wonder he's so mad at me… what the hell was I thinking, putting him through that…?"

For all her underlying concern, Elizabeth now felt a smile tugging, irresistibly, at the side of her mouth. So that was it. A simple crossing of wires had led to all sorts of cascading misunderstandings. Rodney McKay had been moping around his lab, thinking Carson was mad at him for one reason – and Carson was sitting out here, equally miserable, convinced that McKay was mad at him for another.

Of course, this wasn't the first time that two brilliant minds had completely misunderstood each other. And, she now dryly reflected, just from past experience alone, she knew that it wouldn't be the last. More immediately, though… well, she had a little bit of sheepish explaining of her own to do – to a tired, confused CMO who, not surprisingly, was wondering why she was smiling and he wasn't.

"Actually, Carson, I think the person that Rodney's still most mad at is himself… and for what it's worth, he's feeling as lousy about all this as you are..." she said at last, allowing that smile to widen as her gently tempting bait was, just as she'd hoped, instantly taken.

If there was one thing guaranteed to snag her CMO's curiosity, it was a comment like that one. Nothing got those famous mother-henning instincts up and running quicker than a hint of a friend in trouble.

"He – He is…?" Carson frowned back at her, confused, relieved and dismayed in equal measure.

Slightly guilty that she'd taken such advantage of his nature, Elizabeth grew more duly serious – taking advantage of another kind, privacy this time, as she reached across the table to take his hand.

"Yes, Carson, he's still feeling guilty over… well, what he said to you during the Wraith attack…"

She hadn't thought it possible, but already wide blue eyes now managed to grow even rounder – dismayed disbelief now joining the other medley of emotions expressed so openly within them.

"But – But we've talked all that out, Elizabeth…! I – I thought he was okay…" he said at last – the dismay in his eyes increasing as Elizabeth smiled back at him, nodding in blameless sympathy.

"Yes, Carson, I know…" she replied gently, making sure her next words held no hint of criticism. "But I think your second session in the Chair brought it all back again… and rather more besides. Rodney knows that remark he made, about what happened back in Antarctica, really hurt you, and... well, I think with still being bugged by that, and what he now knows about your father…"

"Rodney lost his father, too, when – when he was the same age as me…" Carson cut in softly – its impact written all over his face as he realised what this new bond between them had led to. "All this must have been hell on him, Elizabeth, and – and... dear God, what the hell have I done…?"

Watching his face pale, its expression fall in complete despair, Elizabeth hastened to reassure him.

"You've done the best thing you could do for him, Carson… the best thing any friend could do…"

Either she'd been too cryptic, or he was just too upset to take it, but her bait went untouched this time. In fact, it took several gentle but brisk shakes on Carson's hand to coax him to meet her eyes again – her grip on it staying firm, ensuring she kept that vital contact as she tried, again, to reassure him.

"Carson, you knew Rodney at the SGC long before I arrived there. You know him better than I do. In fact, with this new mind-link between you, you know him better, now, than anyone else here. And yes, it will have brought back some painful memories of his father, just as it's done for you. But so much good has come from it too, Carson. It's given you the best way possible to help him…"

"Aye, lass… yes, it – it has… of course it has..." Carson agreed, clearly surprised he'd not thought this out for himself – still frowning but, to Elizabeth's relief, in self mockery now as he poked the remains of his porridge. "Guess the slow release energy hasn't quite reached my head yet…"

"Considering most of it's still in the bowl, Carson, that's hardly surprising…"

The face he pulled in response was priceless – but not as priceless as the sight of him eating again.

All rueful mutters about it aside, the powers of porridge still worked wonders on her CMO's mood. After just a few spoonfuls, the tired blue eyes brightened, regaining their familiar, steady calmness – prompting Elizabeth to quietly promise herself a big bowlful of the stuff the next morning.

The voice which then broke into her thoughts was still soft, but still warmed her with its gratitude.

"Thanks for putting me straight, lass… if you'll excuse me, I'd better do the same for Rodney…"

"At this time of the morning…?" Elizabeth pointed out, raising a playfully quizzical eyebrow – gladly giving up the fight to keep her face straight as that of her CMO winced in comic realisation.

"This'd never happen with proper, Scottish porridge…" he muttered, glaring at the offending bowl.

Laughing too much to tease him further, Elizabeth just linked her arm, in easy informality, through his - enjoying this simple pleasure of their friendship while both enjoyed the spectacular beauty of the approaching storm.

Beyond the Commissary's shelter, torrents of rain continued to lash down from a cloud-laden sky. But for its two cosily huddled occupants, this miserable morning had just become just a little bit brighter.