I do not own anything in these stories. All rights go to the creator Chris Savino and the current showrunner, Michael Rubiner.
It was Saturday, September 27, 1986 in the Loud House in afternoon as Lori, Bobby and Lincoln were studying over their homework given by the school for the weekend in Lori and Leni's room. Every now and then though, they would play on the NES and read comics together to cool their brain down and Lily was playing along with them.
"Wow, looks like we've got us another school weekend to get through, Lincoln," Lori commented.
"Yeah, Mom. We sure do. I'm hoping for some more homework later this coming school week. Though, of course, we would often play some games and read comics so that our brains don't blow up," Lincoln replied before suddenly, Rita comes in to Lori's room and suddenly finds them together.
"Lincoln, shouldn't you be in your room where Lori told you it's safe?" Rita asked him in concern.
"I know it's safe but, she's my mother! We always spend time together. We even sleep together in either her room, or my room," Lincoln confessed.
"Yeah! Aren't you being overly controlling on all of us too often?!" Lori agreed with Lincoln.
"Yeah! Plus you're both giving us unnecessary chores to do," Lincoln replied.
"Well, It seems like I'm going to have to take measures on you," Rita suggested, "Why don't you go outside? It's not healthy to sit around and just do your schoolwork and then just play games and read comics all day."
"Actually, Mom, some of the health studies show that..." Lori tried to explain but...
"Lori, please stay out of this. Lincoln, outside!" Rita commanded.
"But..." But Rita silenced Lincoln.
"No buts, Lincoln! Both of you! Out! Now!" Rita demanded at them.
"Ugh! Fine!" Lori said angrily as she and Lincoln went outside.
Later, in the backyard, Lori and Lincoln were sitting under the tree and Lincoln was looking over all his schoolwork.
Suddenly, Rita came out and found out that Lori and Lincoln were not exercising.
"Lincoln! That's not what I meant for you!" Rita said to them in a stern tone, "You need to get some exercise! And I have just the thing for you!"
"What is it?!" Lincoln asked suspiciously.
At the mall, Lynn Sr. and some of the other fathers are power walking inside.
"Good workout, eh, boys?" Lynn Sr. shouted out.
"Feeling the burn, bud..." Lincoln kept up at a normal pace.
"Last one to the food court buys the soft pretzels!" Lynn Sr. shouted out.
Lincoln comes to a halt and sees the arcade. He goes inside and plays a game of Space Invaders only to get caught.
"Oh! Hi," Lincoln chuckles nervously, "Guess I'm paying for the pretzels..."
Just then, Lynn Sr. grabs him in a very angry manner.
Back at the house, Rita and Lori were following along with an aerobics show.
"Phew. See? Exercise can be fun! But for me, it's very painful that you're forcing us to do it all the time!" Lori panted before she pulled a muscle, "Agh!"
It appears that Lincoln is following along, "I read ya loud and clear, Mom!" Lincoln agreed with Lori, "It is painful! We got to take a break every now and then!"
It turns out he's just reading a comic book he taped to Rita's bottom. As he tries to turn the page, the comic tears and falls off, and Rita suddenly realizes and quickly turns to them with a very angry look on her face.
"LINCOLN!" Rita yelled furiously at him.
"Come on, Ma! Exercising too much is sorta bad for you! Mom knows that we should take a break every now and then!" Lincoln confessed.
Back in Lincoln's room, Rita was really angry with Lincoln and decided to take some measures on him, "Young man! You don't even know what's going on! You're just trying to get out of the importance in exercising! So it looks like I have no other choice but to take other extreme measures!"
"What kind of measures?" Lincoln asked before Rita gives him gear for a certain sport, "Uh, excuse me? What is this?"
"Lincoln, we are commencing YOU to play football, whether you like it or not!" Rita explained to him.
"Football? Come on! You know sports aren't my thing," Lincoln denied it.
"I don't care what you think, Lincoln! You are going to be playing sports and that is final!" Rita said sternly at Lincoln, "And my husband is signing you up for football whether you like it or not!"
It then fades to a montage of Lincoln participating in sports, but not actually playing them. First off, he's playing catch with Clyde as Clyde tosses him the ball but he's just reading comic books and misses the ball. Later, he's playing Basketball with Liam as Liam passes the ball, but it just passes by Lincoln preoccupied with his comics. Later, he was playing Badminton with Lola as Lola serves the shuttlecock, but he has his racket secured around his sweatband while he's reading another comic and the shuttlecock hits him in the head, not even fazing him. And finally, Lynn tosses a horseshoe that misses the ringer and hits Lincoln's shin.
Back in the house, Rita was angry with Lincoln since he was screwing up in sports.
"Lincoln, what are you even doing?" Rita said angrily, "We trusted you to play sports, but you aren't even playing in them. I didn't want to do this, but it seems like you've left me no choice. One way or another, you're going to be getting some exercise and that is final. Screw this up one more time and you'll be sleeping out on the back porch for the next few nights as punishment."
"Hey, wait! Look!" Lincoln pretends to do aerobics, "I'm exercising right now!" ...only for him to pull a muscle, "Ow, ow! Charley Horse!"
Suddenly, Lori and Bobby came in Lincoln's room with Lori holding Lily in her arms.
"What the... what is going on here?! Mom, what are you doing?!" Lori asked in a stern voice, "Why aren't you being nice with him?!"
"Lori! Bobby! You stay out of this!" Rita yelled, trying to push Lori and Bobby out of it.
"Excuse me?! What do you mean stay out of it?!" Lori denied, "Bobby and I are his parents, remember?! I've been Lincoln's adoptive mother since the day you gave birth to him, and plus I've been Lily's adoptive mother since the day you gave birth to her!"
"Yeah, Lori and I are supposed to be providing them with some quality time, and you and your husband are just giving them along with me and Lori bunch of cruel punishments for no reason!" Bobby agreed with Lori.
"Lori! Bobby! Lincoln's being lazy and he's not wanting to exercise!" Rita denied.
"Don't listen to her, Mom and Dad. Clearly, I cannot play football," Lincoln confessed.
"Don't give us that excuse, young man! You are playing football and that is final!" Rita said angrily at Lincoln.
"Ahem! Can you at least show our kids some respect around here?!" Lori said angrily at Rita.
"Yeah! You're treating them like slaves and outcasts rather than actual children!" Bobby yelled angrily at Rita.
"Now can you please leave this room? Bobby and I have to settle this ourselves!" Lori said in an angry tone.
"Bobby! Lori! You don't understand it! Your father signed him up for football!" Rita explained in a stern manner.
Suddenly, Lori and Bobby got really angry with Rita, "WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT?!" and it shocked Rita.
"Why would you do that?! You should know it's going to tire Lincoln out to the point where he'll collapse and pass out from excessive exercising!" Bobby yelled at Rita.
"Yeah! And Lincoln may possibly suffer from dehydration if it happened without any water breaks!" Lori yelled at her mother in agreement.
"But, guys, Lincoln's not exercising and he is lazy!" Rita denied her.
"No, he's not!" Lori and Bobby both yelled at Rita in an enraging voice.
"Lincoln's a smart kid! He does his homework every night!" Bobby yelled at Rita in anger and fury.
"And you think signing him up for a sport against his will is a good idea?!" Lori snarled at her mother, "That's gonna drop his grades greatly and he'll possibly repeat the year over! BECAUSE! OF! YOU!"
"Lori, Bobby, please! I just wanted to..." Rita now tried to confess.
"You know what?! We heard enough out of your abusive and neglectful mouth right now!" Lori began snarling at her mother, "Get out!"
"But, but I..." But Bobby and Lori both silenced Rita.
"OUT! NOW!" Lori and Bobby both raised their voices at Rita.
"Okay! Okay! Fine, I'm leaving!" Rita said sarcastically as she exited the room.
With that, Lori closed the door behind her as she and Bobby both came up to Lincoln as the four of them sat on the bed and spoke softly, "Hmmm... its not looking good right now, is it, Lincoln?"
"No, Mom and Dad. Your parents signed me up for football without their knowledge, and what's worse is that your mother yelled at me about having to play football!" Lincoln replied in a sad manner, "Fortunately though, in a big family, there's always someone who can help you out of a jam."
"Uh, Lincoln, are you sure that's a good idea? Because we've got a really bad feeling about this," Bobby confessed to Lincoln.
"Because if Mom and Dad find out about this, then that means we'll be forced to sleep outside for the next few nights as punishment," Lori agreed with Bobby.
"What do you mean?" Lincoln asked her.
"Well, technically getting out of exercise is making you lazy," Bobby explained to him.
"Well, I have to keep myself focused on the homework our schools assign us each night and now they're gonna make me play sports," Lincoln explained in anger, "I gotta have someone help me out of a jam with an injury."
However, Lori, Bobby and Lincoln are actually conversing with Lola about Lincoln's quandary.
"An injury to get out of sports...that can be arranged," Lola replied.
"Just not the face," Lincoln commented.
"We'll see about that..." Lola said as she sips her tea.
Later, in the backyard. Lola has her kiddie car all warmed up, ready to do something that involves injuring Lincoln.
"Go easy on me, okay?" Lincoln stuck his leg out.
Lola started grinning fiercely, "We'll see."
"This is not going to be good!" Lori said in fear while holding Lily in her arms.
"Oh, God! I cannot look!" Bobby said in fear as he covered his eyes.
Once Bobby covered his eyes, Lola puts the pedal to the metal, and at the last second, Lincoln moves his leg out of the way, making Lola crash right into the trash.
"Wow. Lola's gotta concentrate on where she's driving that kiddie car," Lori said to Bobby
"YOU WANT AN INJURY?! I'LL GIVE YOU ONE THAT YOU'LL NEVER FORGET!" Lola snarled as she proceeds to charge at Lincoln with full force while he was trying to run away only to pull a muscle again.
"Ow, ow! Charley Horse!" Lincoln cried before Lola pounces on him to pulverize him.
"Agh! I can't watch!" Lori screamed as she and Bobby looked away.
Just then, Lynn shows up, "Oh, we're wrestling? Cool!" Lynn said as she blows a whistle and stops the brawl, "Lola, that's unnecessary roughness!"
"Well, he deserves it! I was trying to help him get out of playing Football, and he made me total my car!" Lola snarled, "AND I JUST PUT IN THE CUPCAKE AIR FRESHENER!"
"Wait. Get out of playing Football?" Lynn said in fear, "Why would you wanna do that? Football rules!"
"Lynn! Please, Lola might be right," Lori responded, "Lincoln just isn't as athletic as you are!"
"Mom's right. I don't even know how to play!" Lincoln agreed, "Plus, I'm gonna get my butt kicked!"
"You got that right!" Lola said suspiciously as she held her grudge.
"That's enough! Hit the showers!" Lynn yelled before Lola runs off in fear, "You forgot that you've got a secret weapon: me. I'll teach you everything you need to know about Football."
"I don't think this is gonna be a good idea, boy" Bobby explained in fear.
"Any word from you yet?" Lynn asked him threateningly.
"Well... Alright," Lincoln replied.
"Good. Now drop and give me 20," Lynn commanded softly.
Lincoln gets down on the ground and takes out his wallet and a five dollar bill, "I've only got a 5."
Lynn realizes that it's not gonna be easy.
First off, Lynn shows Lincoln how to step by running through tires which Lincoln trips over and gets rolled off by one.
Next, Lynn was showing him how to drink real protein shakes for protein as Lincoln drinks one, knowing that it tastes good.
Soon after, she shows him how to pass by tossing a ball through the center of the tire swing as Lincoln misses and gets pegged in the back of the head by the ball.
She then takes him for a jog around the neighborhood, but by sunset, they make it back but Lincoln took a bus back home much to their disappointment.
Next, she shows Lincoln how to punt with Lynn as the ball holder. Then, some Peanuts style music starts to play and Lincoln charges at the ball, but Lynn pulls it away just like in the comic strip.
"ARGH!" Lincoln lands on his back.
Later, at Ketcham Park, Lynn and Lincoln were practicing receiving.
"Hike!" Lynn passes the ball to Lincoln only for him to get decked in the eye and crash by the feet of some bulky Football kids who laugh at his pain.
"If you clowns are done, we need the field!" Hawk suggested, "We gotta practice for junior football league."
"You guys are playing junior football, too?" Lincoln realized, "What team are you on?"
"The Hazeltucky Hockers!" Hawk and Hank hock loogies, "And what team are you on, dork?"
"The Royal Woods Roosters!" Lincoln replied before he, Lori, and Lynn all wave their hands high up, "Cock-a-doodle-doo!"
"Nice cheer. When we play you, you're cock-a-doodle-doomed!" Hawk called out.
"Yeah! I'm gonna pluck me a few feathers!" Hank joked and they both laugh which irks Lynn.
"You chumps are lucky I'm not playing, 'cause I'd whoop all your butts!" Lynn yelled at them.
Hawk ruffles Lynn's hair not intimidated one bit, "Sure you would, ponytail," and Hawk and Hank walk off laughing some more.
Lincoln suddenly got an idea like he was inspired, "Lynn! That's a brilliant idea! You could pretend to be me and play in my place.
"Yeah, right..." Lynn smirked.
"Wait! Lincoln, what's going on here? Look, getting Lynn to take your place isn't the best idea," Lori confessed.
"Lori, I think he might be right. He's not really athletic and our parents are making him play," Bobby explained to Lori.
"How do you know, Mom and Dad? There's no girls' league around here, right?" Lincoln explained to her, "This would give Lynn a chance to play, and me a chance to live out my full life and hang out with you guys."
Lynn thought about, "Hmm...I could use another sport right now. I've only got four."
"So, what do you say?" Lincoln asked before he and Lori do their cheer, "Cock-a-doodle-doo?"
Lynn grins with acceptance.
"This cannot be good," Lori said to herself in fear.
Later, Lincoln is seen wearing his gear, waving to Rita and heading off to one of his games but heads over to a tree where Lynn is waiting. They switch the gear off to her and she goes to play the game while Lori, Bobby and Lincoln all relax by a tree enjoying the nice autumn breeze together. After the game, Lynn returns and switches the gear back on Lincoln, but before he can return home, she throws some mud on his face to make it look convincing. He returns home as he and Lori let Rita know the game went well. This goes on for a couple more weeks into October 15, 1986.
"I can't believe we pulled this off! Only one more game to go!" Lincoln exclaimed.
They switch off and Lynn gets the mud ready, "Well, I'm really gonna miss this," Lynn then throws mud at Lincoln.
"I'm not gonna miss that," Lincoln explained as he and Lori and Bobby head home only to be met up with Lynn Sr. who had an angry look on his face.
"So, you and Lori both thought you could get away with this, huh?" Lynn Sr. asked them in an angry tone.
"But, we, uh..." Lori, Bobby and Lincoln tried to explain with their tongues tied.
"Not telling your family..." Lynn Sr. then spoke in a proud tone, "...you're a big Football star!?" and holds up a newspaper with a front page article about his Football status, "Crowds Love Loud! Haven't seen that headline since my break dancing days. We're so proud of you, lad! We're all gonna be at your game tomorrow!"
"All of you?" Lincoln realized.
"You betcha! And if you need some new moves for your touchdown dance..." Lynn Sr. shows off some of his break dancing moves and scats, "I'm on fire, on fire, on fire!" and then he dances and scats some more.
Later, with Lynn and Lori was they were talking with Lincoln as Lori held Lily in her hands.
"Lynn, you were just supposed to play, not become a big star!" Lincoln confessed.
"Sorry, Linc. I only know how to give 110%," Lynn denied.
"Look, Lincoln. your father and I know that you shouldn't get Lynn to take your place to avoid exercising in the first place but we at least understand that you aren't athletic like Lynn is," Lori explained softly to Lincoln.
"Well, now we got a problem. Because I'm so good, the whole family wants to watch me play tomorrow," Lincoln explained.
"Don't worry. We fooled everyone all season," Lynn commented, "There's no reason we can't do it for one more game."
"Ugh! For god's sake, Lynn. Can we just get going already?!" Bobby demanded Lynn.
"Yeah, let's get moving," Lincoln agreed, "We got a big game to attend and I don't want to be late for it."
Thursday, October 16, 1986
It was the big game, the Roosters VS the Hockers. Lynn Sr. is dressed in a Rooster costume with his tail feathers blocking Rita's face. Lana has face makeup on and is holding a sign that says GO!. Lily has one that says GOO! with her face as the first O". Lucy has a sign that says "Embrace the darkness". Luan, Luna, and Lola are excited for the game, but Lisa is just reading a book on advanced calculus. Leni was using binoculars to search for her star player "brother".
"Agh! Where the hell is Lincoln? I literally don't see him anywhere," Leni said while she was searching for Lincoln.
Suddenly, Leni spots Lincoln right in front of her face and drops the binoculars in fright, "AAAAAAHHHHH!"
"Hey, guys!" Lincoln waved at them.
"There's my little Football star!" Rita exclaimed.
"Hey, Lincoln! Sign my hat!" Lana said as she tosses her hat to him.
"Saving it for the game," Lincoln replied.
Under the bleachers, Lincoln has swapped the gear out over to Lynn.
"Number one, Lincoln Loud!" the announcer shouted.
"Well, that's me!" Lynn exclaimed.
"I think we're gonna pull this off," Lincoln exclaimed.
Lily drops her drink through the crack between seats and babbles upon seeing their secret.
"It's alright, Lily," Lori spoke softly to Lily, "Mommy will get your drink momentarily."
Lily laughs as Lynn heads out onto the field.
"Alright, let's beat these chumps!" Lynn shouted.
"Ladies and gentlemen, as a special treat, Luna Loud will be performing the National Anthem! Please remove all hats and helmets," the announcer shouted before a rocking version of the Star-Spangled Banner begins to play, with Lynn in a conundrum.
"Uh...I gotta pee," Lynn runs off as Lincoln switches out to join the rest of the anthem as Luna finishes her performance by smashing her axe on stage.
"LET'S PLAY BALL, DUDES!" Luna shouted.
Lincoln then starts to sneak off only to be caught by the coach, "Loud, where are you going?" the coach demanded an answer.
"Bathroom!" Lincoln yelled.
"Again? Seriously?!" The coach complained while Lincoln switches out with Lynn who runs into two familiar players.
"Hey, aren't you that twerp from the park? We're gonna knock you on your tail feathers," Hawk proclaimed while he and Hank hock loogies and Lynn growls at them viciously.
The game starts with the kickoff and Lynn catches the ball and scores a touchdown.
"Touchdown, Roosters!" the referee shouted.
The Louds and some of the show's staff cheer for this, but the rest of the staff is upset by it. Lynn Sr. breaks out some of his dance moves and knocks his drink with his tail feathers, causing it to splash Lincoln below.
"Tackle made by Loud!" the announcer shouted before a hot dog lands on Lincoln's head, "Ball carried by Loud!" and some popcorn falls on Lincoln, "Touchdown, Lincoln Loud!"
This time, Lincoln puts on an umbrella hat and saves himself from getting splashed by water before he suddenly gets hit by dropped binoculars just before the referee blows his whistle.
"Halftime!" the referee called.
The local news team is out on the sidelines.
"Hey, Loud, over here!" the coach called for the teammate, "They wanna interview you for TV. Take off your helmet."
"Uh...I gotta..." Lynn tried to explain but...
"Let me guess. Go to the bathroom," Lynn nods in response to the coach and runs off, "You guys want an action shot of me and my whistle?" The coach then blows the whistle and poses as Lynn and Lincoln switch off.
"That last play was sensational," the reporter commented, "What can you tell us about it?"
"That last play? Uh...the thing is, that was in the past, and I'm all about the future. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to pee," Lincoln then runs off to the bathroom.
"Guys, how about this one?" The coach made another pose.
Sometime later, the second half begins.
"Set, hut, hut, hike!" a rooster player snaps the ball to Lynn before suddenly, the Hockers charge at Lynn all at once and plow to the ground, leaving her injured. The ref blows his whistle and the team carries Lynn to the sidelines. The Hockers from before laugh and hock some more.
"Back off! Give him some air!" The coach takes Lynn's helmet off and reveals her in front of everyone.
Lynn Sr. and Rita both proclaimed, "LYNN?!"
"Who's Lynn? I thought you were Lincoln," the coach realized.
"No, I'm Lincoln," Lincoln explained, "Lynn, are you okay?"
"I'm fine," Lynn replied.
"Oh dear god! Lynn, What happened?!" Lori asked in fear.
"I think I just sprained my ankle," Lynn replied.
"Ohhh! That poor girl!" Lori replied with worry.
"Poor girl?! Would somebody mind telling me what the hell is going on here?" Coach demanded.
"Yes! I'd like to know, too!" Rita and Lynn Sr. were looking at them now and they were very angry with them, "YOUNG MAN, WHY WOULD YOU SWAP PLACES WITH LYNN DURING THE FOOTBALL GAME?!"
"Uh oh, Lincoln. I think we should tell them," Lori suggested in fear.
"Guys, please, it's all our faults," Lincoln confessed, "I didn't want to play Football, so I convinced Lynn to play for me."
But Rita and Lynn Sr. suddenly were shocked upon that statement and they were now extremely furious with Lincoln.
"UNACCEPTABLE! LINCOLN LAWRENCE ALBERT LOUD! WE MADE YOU PLAY SPORTS JUST SO YOU COULD HAVE LYNN PLAY FOR YOU?!" Lynn Sr. yelled furiously to Lincoln, "PERHAPS THAT WASN'T EVEN ENOUGH! MAYBE YOU SHOULD PROBABLY BE PUNISHED FOR THIS, YOUNG MAN!" He then slapped Lincoln very hard in the face, surprisingly knocking him to the ground, much to the shock of Lori and Lynn.
Lori decided to protest against her parents' actions and yelled at them, "Hey! What is with you?! You're treating Lincoln like a freaking outcast! You better make it up to him or Bobby and I will make the tough decision to appoint ourselves as the sisters' legal guardians!"
"So what?! He's not doing what he told us!" Lynn Sr. denied, "He should probably be sent to Aunt Ruth!"
"No, I'm not making you do that!" Lori yelled at Lynn Sr.
"Yeah, I wanted to help him become skilled at football!" Lynn protested as she agreed with Lori.
"WELL, IF YOU'RE BOTH GOING TO SIDE WITH LINCOLN, THEN PERHAPS YOU SHOULD BOTH BE PUNISHED AS WELL!" Lynn Sr. yelled furiously as he was about to slap Lori and Lynn in addition but suddenly...
"LEAVE HIM ALONE!" Bobby shouted as he entered the football field as he ran up to Lynn Sr. and Rita.
"Bobby?! What are you up to?! This is not important to you right now!" Rita said angrily to Bobby.
"What do you think you're both doing?" Bobby asked angrily before he then finds out that his son Lincoln is rubbing his cheeks from being slapped really hard by Lynn Sr. which really enraged Bobby and turned to him with a very furious look on his face and started yelling at them, "YOU MONSTERS! WHY WOULD YOU PUNISH HIM LIKE THAT?! HE TRIED TO GET OUT OF SPORTS BY CONVINCING LYNN TO PLAY FOR HIM AND THIS IS HOW YOU REPAY HIM?! BY SOMEHOW BEATING HIM UP FOR IT?! THAT IS UNFORGIVABLE! BOTH OF YOU GET BACK TO THE BLEACHERS RIGHT NOW! AND IF YOU PUNISH LINCOLN THIS HARSHLY AGAIN, LORI AND I ARE GOING TO APPOINT OURSELVES AS YOUR DAUGHTERS' LEGAL GUARDIANS! NOW MOVE!"
In response, a now frightened Rita and Lynn Sr. quickly ran back to the bleachers and sat back down.
"Hey, Lynn. Take care of that ankle. I want you on my team next year," the coach spoke sympathetically while Lynn left.
"Coach, get your team on the field or you forfeit!" the referee commanded.
"I got a problem, Ref. I'm one man short," the coach replied softly.
"No, you're not," Lincoln takes off his umbrella hat and decides to speak with Bobby and Lori, "Look, Mom, Dad, I'm sorry I lied."
"But, Lincoln. You only wanted to do what's best to keep Mom and Dad from forcing you to play," Lori explained softly.
"Yeah, son. Your mom and I didn't want you to be punished and abused for trying to get out of sports," Bobby added.
"I know, Mom and Dad. And now I'm gonna do what your parents asked me to: get some exercise," Lincoln shouted out.
Lori then kissed him in the cheek and spoke softly, "Be careful, my son!"
The score is 28 to 27 with the Roosters leading by one.
"We're up by one with a minute to go. Just don't blow it," the coach suggested.
"Cock-a-doodle-doo, coach!" Lincoln cheered out as he heads out onto the field to play but his parents were worried, "You can do this. You can do this."
"Back for more, Loud? My my, you made yourself a bad choice," Hawk complied before the Hockers hock again.
"You can do this!" Lincoln fought back, not afraid of the Hazeltucky Hockers.
"Set, hut, hut, hike!" the rooster player snaps the ball and passes it to Lincoln.
"I caught it!" but the Hockers come charging at Lincoln and he runs around the field like crazy and scores on the end zone, "Yes!" and he then turns to the viewers, "I don't know what I was so afraid of. Sports can be pretty awesome. And it turns out, I'm a natural."
However, the Hocker player tags him, indicating he screwed up, "YEAH!"
The whistle blows, ending the game, "Actually, Loud, you ended up running the wrong way and scored a safety for the other team! So that means we lose the game!" the coach corrected him in concern.
The Hockers are victorious and take home the winning trophy, leaving Lincoln to realize his mistake.
The other Roosters then get angry at Lincoln for botching the last play so he decided to speak out, "WAIT! Before you turn me into a human pretzel, let me something. The matriarch of the Loud Family wanted me to play sports, but I'm not into it, my sister Lynn is! But they wanted him to have fun, and that's it what matters, fun, is more important than winning. You guys have fun, didn't you?"
Lori, Bobby, Ronnie Anne, Lily and the other sisters were all touched by Lincoln's words and the rooster players be silent for a moment but the parents were not happy with what Lincoln did.
"Yeah, I guess he's right," a player replied softly.
"Despite the fact that we lost the game, it was fun," a player agreed sympathetically.
"Loud! Loud! Loud! Loud!" the Roosters started cheering for him sympathetically.
"Hey! Why are you celebrating? We won!" Hank confessed in confusion.
"He admitted that he just wanted to have fun!" a player replied softly.
"A correction to my previous statement: I am not really a natural. But, on the plus side, at least I had fun," Lincoln explained to the viewers before he pulls a muscle, "GAH! Charley Horse!" ...and then falls over in pain and everyone discovers that he pulled a muscle.
"Jeez. We gotta get a medical advisor for him!" a player suggested.
Friday, October 17, 1986
The evening after the game, Lori and Bobby were taking Lincoln and Lily out for a little walk at the park to help rest up Lincoln's mind.
"Geez, Lincoln. This was way harder than we thought it would be," Lori said to Lincoln.
"I couldn't believe this had to happen, babe," Bobby said to Lori, "You were right. Sports really isn't our boy's kind of thing. Those parents are G-U-I-L-T-Y."
"Mom, Dad. I'm sorry I lied. I know they'll be disappointed in me. I shouldn't let anyone to take my place for some sporting event. I just saw how upset your parents were after the truth came out, especially since you were all proud of what Lynn was achieving when you thought she was me. Then when I messed up, your parents booed me, and my team was mad and threatened to beat me up. I was starting to think that for the rest of my life, the four of us plus Ronnie Anne would be nothing but a disappointment to your parents, and that they won't see us as part of their family anymore," Lincoln said as he began to tear up.
"Lincoln, please don't say that. Look, we know they would force you to play football every day," Lori said softly as she comforted Lincoln.
"But I really felt so harsh when they signed you up for a sport without your consent," Bobby said sympathetically in agreement with Lori, "We just felt that it was not the way to go for you."
"Yeah, me too, Mom and Dad. I can't be exercising all the time, you know that?" Lincoln explained dejectedly.
"Mmmm... yeah, you might be right. Every now and then, we all have to take a break from exercising and rely on other things," Bobby explained.
"But just because you have to get some exercise doesn't mean you can't play video games and read comic books anymore for the rest of your life," Lori added in explanation.
"I know, Mom and Dad. I know," Lincoln replied.
"Mm-hmm," Lily agreed as they continue with their time at the park.
Sometime later that evening, Bobby, Lori, Lincoln and Lily have just come back home to see their parents sitting on the couch.
Lori looked towards the viewers and said, "Lincoln, I really hope Mom and Dad will make it up to us. Bobby, could you go upstairs? I have to do what a responsible mother like does."
"Very well, babe," Bobby replied as he went up to Lori's bedroom while Lori and Lincoln walked closer to the parents so they could discuss about the football incident.
"Mom? Dad? I think we may need to discuss about this," Lori called for them in a stern tone which got their attention.
"Lori. Are you calling for us right now?" Rita asked her in concern.
"Yes! It's because of what happened at the football game back on yesterday and how bad you were to Lincoln," Lori replied in a stern tone.
Rita then started explaining, "Lori. I know what you mean by that. And..." she paused for a moment before she turned to Lincoln, "We'd just like to say we're sorry for making Lincoln play football. You understand we just wanted him to get some exercise," she explained.
"We understand," Lincoln replied.
Lori then asked Rita a question, "So, is Lincoln going to be punished for making Lynn play instead of him?"
"Lori, We're not going to punish him. But we were not happy with him about what he did," Rita replied in concern.
"And to add an insult to injury, I couldn't believe I slapped him so hard in the face for making Lynn play for him and I still cannot believe that Rita and I slapped you both in the faces just because you and your sisters tried to help Lincoln win that video contest last month," Lynn Sr. added in sadness, "We're just nothing but bad parents for doing that."
But Lori then calmed her father down, "No no no no no, shhh shhhh shhhh. It's going to be fine, Dad. We all know this was too far. And plus, I'm still very disappointed in you both for doing something so cruel and harsh towards us. But, I'm giving you both a fair warning. If you ever do something this cruel to Lincoln again, I'm going to have to punish you both for two months without going to your workplaces, and you will only do exactly what Bobby and I tell you."
"Okay, Lori. It won't happen again," Lynn Sr. pleaded to Lori.
"Thank you. Now I want you to apologize to poor Lincoln here," Lori said to her father while patting Lincoln's back.
"I know, Lori, I know," Lynn Sr. replied before he kneeled down to Lincoln, "Hey, kiddo. I'm sorry about what happened at the game yesterday and about what happened with the video contest last month, and I was such a bad parent for slapping you in the face just because you were swapping places with Lynn and that's in addition to us slapping you both in the face and blindly punishing you both along with the others over some trophy for a video contest"
"It's all right, sir. My mom knows that my interests are on other things," Lincoln replied softly, "Can we make sure something this cruel never happens again?"
"Of course. I promised Lori and Bobby that," Lynn Sr. replied as he shook hands with Lincoln.
Before Lori left with Lily in her arms, Rita then told them something, "Lori, Lincoln, it looks like your father and I decided that you were right about being the mother of Lincoln and Lily since you're their caring adoptive mother. And we decided you and Lincoln can both stay home with Lily and Bobby on the weekend without leaving the place. That might give his teammates who attend your school time to forget about what happened."
That night in the parents' bedroom, Rita was already in bed when Lynn Sr. walked in. Lynn Sr. released a small sigh while getting under the covers on his side of the bed.
"Something the matter dear?" Rita asked in concern but her husband stayed silent for a few seconds before answering his wife.
"I am just disappointed it wasn't Lincoln playing in that game. You know, one time, I dreamed for him to become a football or baseball star ever since he came into the world," Lynn Sr. admitted, "But it became harder for him to achieve it since he was Lori's adoptive son."
"Yes I remember when we bought a baby football helmet for him when he was a few months old but I think Lori told us that making a mobile with little footballs and a little football jersey to put over his crib was pushing it a little too far," Rita remembered.
"Yes I remember when Lori made us take it down and she placed the old one back up," Lynn Sr. told Rita.
Lynn Sr. could remember looking at Lincoln in Lori's arms on the day his wife Rita gave birth to him. Even after Lori adopted Lincoln soon after birth, Lynn Sr. began to picture him wearing a football uniform and holding a football in his hands despite the fact that he and Rita never cared about him hardly. But while Lori and Lincoln were growing up together, Lynn Sr. noticed the boy's interest were on other things. He and Rita also knew that Lori wouldn't allow them to push or force Lincoln into playing a sport, so they decided to just accept what Lincoln liked to do since Lori always stuck by Lincoln's side as his adoptive mother, though they often punished him and Lori for no reasoning whatsoever.
"Remember the time when we tried teaching him to play catch when he was six?" Lynn Sr. said.
"Yes dear I remember," Rita replied, "In fact, Lori remembers as well."
But that wasn't a success. Every ball the two threw at Lincoln, the boy missed catching the ball. Finally, the last ball which Lynn Sr. threw ended up hitting Lincoln on the side of his head, causing the kid to start howling loud enough to wake the dead. At that same moment, Lori rushed outside within seconds, and she scolded her parents while carrying Lincoln inside to tend to his injury. That was the only attempt Rita and Lynn Sr. made together to teach Lincoln a sport.
"He couldn't catch one ball even when we tried going easy on him for once," Lynn Sr. said.
"Dear you'll just have to accept that Lincoln's interests are in other areas like Lori does," Rita replied.
"But I was so excited to see his name in that newspaper headline," Lynn Sr. said, then sighed again, "It looks like we'll just have to deal with the fact he'll never be an athlete."
"Well, we have our Junior filling that role," Rita told her husband, then she yawned.
"Well, I have to get up tomorrow. At least I don't have to go to work tomorrow or Sunday. Good night dear," Rita said, then turned off her light after giving Lynn Sr. a kiss on his cheek and they both went to sleep.