Thank you MaggieMay17 for beta'ing, Ncsupnatfan and VegasGranny for pre-reading, and you all for reading.

Chapter Five

Dean's eyes fixed on the place Sam had been, and his breath came out in a heavy sigh.

He'd not been sure of exactly what to expect when Sam was brought back, apart from a miracle, but he'd thought there would be more of a connection there for them all, a reunion. It wasn't like Sam was brought back against his will, and he'd proved how strong he was again and again, but he'd seemed so different, so vulnerable.

Mary covered her face with her hands and made a soft gasping sound. Nick eased her up and put his arms around her. She buried her face into his shoulder and said, "He left."

"Yeah, but he said he'd come back, too," Dean said. "He just needs a little time."

"But he was so different," Nick said. "When we saw him before, when we didn't remember him, he was so strong, calm. He seemed to be in control all the time. But now he was… I don't want to say weak… Unnerved? Wary? And when he looked at me, he seemed scared."

Dean hadn't noticed that as he'd been consumed by what he was seeing and how Sam was reacting to him, but he trusted Nick to know what he was seeing in their brother.

Mary pulled back and looked at Nick. "You think he was scared of you?"

Nick nodded. "He was. It was like he wasn't seeing me; he was seeing someone else."

"But who?" Mary asked.

Nick shrugged. "I don't know, but there was nothing good there. We were never close like him and Dean were; we didn't connect right, but he was still Sam, my brother. I didn't feel that from him anymore."

"He's been through a lot," Dean reminded them. "Chuck said his grace was going to feel raw. It was probably that. He went through hell with Crowley, went months with us not knowing who he was, and then he died. He's going to be feeling all kinds of stressed out."

Castiel cleared his throat. "How do you feel, Nick?"

Nick looked puzzled. "Uh, disappointed, worried, exhausted. Why?"

Castiel stared at him a moment as if analyzing him. "Something has been taken from me."

"What?" Dean asked.

Castiel answered, his eyes still fixed on Nick with an intensity that made Dean uncomfortable, "Nick's experience of the Cage."

Dean's eyes snapped to Nick. "Are you okay?"

Nick frowned. "Yeah. I mean, I'm worried about Sam, obviously, but otherwise, I feel like me. I don't feel like I did when it was still in my head. I'm not seeing Lucifer or anything."

Dean breathed a sigh of relief. Nick going through that again was one of his worst nightmares. He'd come so close to losing Nick to that madness, and he never wanted to feel as helpless as that again.

"I don't understand," Castiel said, sounding frustrated. "It's been there since I took it, I always sensed it there, but it's gone."

Nick pinched the bridge of his nose. "Do we need to stress over it? We've got enough going on already. Cas, man, if you've not got it and I've not got it, I'm calling it a good thing. Let's not go looking for trouble since we've already got enough."

Castiel didn't look reassured, but he turned and walked from the room without a word. Dean and Nick exchanged a glance and then followed, Mary behind them.

When they got into the library, Dean saw that Chuck was sitting at the table opposite Rowena, and they seemed deep in conversation with Jack looking between them both as they spoke.

"It's not him, though," Chuck said. "I know he put you through terrible things, but that was never Sam. It was always Lucifer."

"I know that," Rowena said bitterly. "And I don't expect you to understand since you're invulnerable, but when you've had your skull crushed and been immolated by an archangel that smiled the whole time he did it, it's hard to let go and accept that he's suddenly not the same person. It's his face that I see." She looked up as they entered, and she fixed her gaze on Nick. "You understand, don't you, Nicholas?"

Nick rubbed the back of his neck. "I guess. I mean, I remember how it felt to see him before I knew the truth, his true face always in the background of my mind, but now I just see my brother."

Rowena huffed a laugh. "Must be nice for you. Unfortunately, Sam Winchester is nothing to me. I don't have any other experience or bond with him to call upon."

"I understand," Jack said quietly. "He's not my father, I know that, but he looks like him. He never hurt me the same way he did you both, but he did hurt me in other ways."

Nick sighed. "You just need to get to know him. He's nothing like Lucifer, really. He's… good."

"He really is," Dean said. "Right, Mom?"

Mary smiled sadly. "I can't call upon experience. He was a good child, but he's a man now that I don't know. I am sure he is good, though. He must be to do what he did for Nick. I haven't had a chance to know him yet, though. He left."

"We saw," Jack said. "He took both of the archangel blades—his own and Michael's."

"I imagine he doesn't want to be stabbed again," Rowena said pointedly.

Dean winced, and Nick ducked his head.

"It wasn't your fault, either of you," Chuck said. "Nick was scared of Lucifer, and Dean was protecting his brother."

"And he was probably a little bitter about us trying to send him to the Cage," Rowena pointed out.

Dean's eyes snapped to Nick. "You did what?"

Nick flinched and seemed to need to force himself to meet Dean's eye. "I had Rowena help me. We tried to get his grace out and do the spell. It didn't work."

"It wouldn't," Chuck said. "Sam is not an archangel in a vessel. The body is his own and coexists with the soul in it. He's a hybrid in a way. There has never been another angel like him. That's why it's so hard for him. His soul was damaged when he was with Lucifer and Crowley, just like yours was in the Cage, Nick."

Dean gasped. "Does that mean what happened to Nicky is going to happen to Sam, too?"

The idea was abhorrent. He'd only just got his brother back. He couldn't lose Sam the way he'd almost lost Nick.

"It won't kill him. He's an archangel with immense strength," Chuck said. "And he won't suffer the same… side effects Nick did."

"Like hallucinations and chronic sleep deprivation," Nick said, his tone strained.

"Exactly," Chuck said. "An angel can't experience a damaged soul in the same way as someone fully human."

"What about Nick?" Castiel asked. "I don't have his experience anymore. It's just gone."

Chuck looked startled for a moment, disbelieving, and then his expression smoothed into a smile, and he said, "You don't need to worry, Castiel; none of you need to worry. Nick's experience hasn't been transferred back to him. It's been taken."

"By who?" Dean asked suspiciously, confused by Chuck's reaction.

"By you, right?" Nick said.

Chuck nodded. "I thought I owed you more than your brother's life. You have all been at war for years, always fighting something bigger than yourselves. That's over now. Michael is dead, and Lucifer will never come back. It's time for you all to rest. I wanted to take away some of the consequences of the battles you have fought before. The war is over. I wanted it to be a fresh start for you all, so I took the experience and healed your soul."

"Really?" Dean asked. "It looked like it was news to you."

Chuck raised an eyebrow. "I am God, Dean, there is no 'news' for me and hasn't been since creation. I was just surprised that Castiel noticed so quickly. I didn't realize how acutely he felt it."

Reassured, Dean nodded.

"Can you do that for Sam, too, take it away?" Mary asked hopefully. "If he's been hurt the same way Nick was, you could help him."

"I could if he would let me," Chuck said. "I don't imagine he will, though. He still doesn't trust me. I won't do anything against his will; he has lost too much and suffered too much for me to do that. To him, it will feel like a violation for me to interfere with his soul."

Dean cursed. "No, he's definitely not saying yes to that."

"Why not?" Mary asked. "He can't want to hold onto pain like that."

"You didn't see him when we were trying to persuade him to come back, Mom," Dean said. "He was raging. He blames Chuck for the spell."

"He does," Chuck agreed. "And I think it was the very worst thing that was done to him. His family was stolen. You remember how it felt to look at him and think he was Lucifer? Imagine how it felt to be the one seen that way. After everything Lucifer put him through, he was suddenly seen as the creature that had hurt every one of you in some way. He loves you all so much—you too, Mary, even though he has no more memory of you than you do him—and he lost it all. What I did, taking Lucifer away, should have been a gift, but Cuthbert Sinclair turned it into a curse."

"Wait! Cuthbert Sinclair?" Nick said. "Magnus? That freak that wanted Dean in his zoo? He's dead."

"Apparently, Lucifer brought him back," Dean said. "Lucifer knew his attack on Chuck might not work out, and he had a failsafe in place."

"But how did it break?" Mary asked. "As soon as Sam died, I remembered it all, I recognized him."

Chuck smiled slightly. "No spell of any man, no matter how powerful, is capable of breaking the love you all shared. It was enough to make you forget for a while, but that instinctual bond, even though you were unaware of it, created immense grief. The spell didn't stand a chance."

Dean raked a hand over his face. He was damn glad he had Sam back, it was a gift, but he didn't know what to do next. He wanted to see him, to talk to him, but he didn't want to push him past what he was comfortable with. And that seemed to be very little given the way their last interaction had gone.

When Sam was still technically dead, in that strange place with Chuck, it had been easier as Sam had been open with him. He'd shown that he loved him. All the barriers came up when he was alive, and Dean didn't know how to breach them.

"What do we do?" he asked, his voice desperate as he fixed his eyes on Chuck. "Do you even know where he is?"

"Alaska," Chuck said. "He likes to spend time on Mount McKinley."

Nick grunted a laugh, and Dean frowned.

"Sorry," Nick said. "It's just this is all so weird. Sam always liked his space, he'd go away when he was dealing with something, but the fact he's sitting on the top of a mountain right now for space is a mind-bender. It's Sam. He's so different now. He's a damn archangel."

"Imagine how it feels for me," Mary said. "He was a toddler, and now he's… It's even harder than it was to see you and Dean as men. At least I could still relate to you. Sam's not even human."

Nick winced, and Dean guessed his thoughts had gone to his own history. When the psychic powers had been ruling, Nick had thought he was less than human. It had been a battle for Dean to make him see otherwise, especially when he had his father's words in his head—If you can't save him, kill him.

Chuck looked thoughtful. "Castiel, I think you're the logical choice to speak to him next."

"Me?" Castiel said doubtfully. "I had less time with him than anyone else. At least Mary had two years. I only had one, and we didn't form much of a bond."

Chuck nodded. "Yes, but you can relate to him on a different level. You're both angels. Also, the fact you don't have that deep relationship already will help. He might be able to handle your presence easier than someone he loves."

Castiel considered a long time and then nodded. "I will go now, but it will take me a long time to reach him, and he may not stay in Alaska. And…" He looked embarrassed, "I'll have to climb a mountain."

Chuck looked amused. "Then I suppose I should make it easier on you."

He moved to Castiel's side and touched his back. Castiel flinched, and then a wide smile spread across his mouth, and his eyes glinted with blue-white light.

"What are you…" Nick started then trailed off as Chuck stepped back and held up a hand.

"Cas? You okay?" Dean pressed.

Castiel straightened, and the shadows of wings spread from his back onto the wall. There was no sign of the damage that had been in all angels' wings since the fall. They were whole and healed.

"Thank you," Castiel said fervently.

"I thought you could all use the added advantage," Chuck said. "Sam is going to be difficult enough to keep up with, even if you're not on foot. You should have full access to your other abilities, too." Seeing the question in their eyes, he nodded and went on, "Yes, you can resurrect people. You will also be able to sense Sam unless he is shielding himself from you. If he does that, there is nothing even I can do to help you. Expect him to do it. But he's still in Alaska right now."

Castiel nodded, and the shadows of his wings disappeared. He concentrated for a moment and then frowned. "I can't fly."

Nick slapped his forehead. "The sigils are still up."

"Then how did Sam fly?" Mary asked.

"An archangel at full strength, as Sam is now, is infinitely more powerful than a seraph," Chuck explained. "He probably felt the resistance of them, but they wouldn't be enough to ground him. I advise that you remove them so Castiel can have free entrance and exit, though, as there is no other angelic threat for you to worry about."

"I'll do it now," Nick said, nodding eagerly. "You go, Cas, make sure he's okay. Jack, come help me with the sigils."

"Hang on a sec," Dean said, a flicker of concern in his chest. "Sam was threatening to take Castiel's grace last time they were alone. If he's still pissed…"

"Why is he so pissed? What is he pissed about?" Nick asked.

Dean bit his lip. He'd forgotten Nick didn't know about Bobby's fate and Castiel's knowledge of it. It made complete sense to him, now, why Sam was so close to hurting Castiel like that when he found out. Sam had been close to Bobby, sharing a mindset that was tuned to lore and information as well as strategy, like Nick, and protectiveness, like Dean. They'd shared a strong bond.

"I don't think that will be a problem," Chuck said. "Things are different for Sam now. You will be safe with him, Castiel."

Castiel nodded and made for the war room. They watched him go, not looking back at each other until the sounds of the door opening and closing reached them, and Rowena spoke up.

"I'm leaving, too," she said.

"You can't!" Nick said. "Rowena, we need you to help us find Magnus. We've got to kill him."

Rowena smiled sweetly. "As pressing as I'm sure that is to you, I'm not going to stay in the place that will no doubt shortly be inhabited by the face of the archangel that killed me. I'm glad you have your brother back, truly, but I am not sticking around to watch you all build new memories." She got to her feet and strode out of the room.

"Awesome," Nick spat. "We could have used her help."

"You don't need it," Chuck said. "Think of all you have done. Finding and killing one warlock is not going to be a challenge after that." He rolled his shoulders. "I should go, too. Amara will be waiting for me, and Lucifer needs my time."

Nick scowled, and Dean guessed he was thinking of the unfairness of Lucifer getting face time with his father when their own brother was too overwhelmed to be around them.

Castiel was going to him now, which was some reassurance as he was a part of their family, even if Sam hadn't had a chance to appreciate that yet.

"Yeah, okay," Dean said. "Thank you, Chuck. Seriously, if you hadn't…"

"Yes, thank you," Mary said fervently.

Chuck smiled, and Nick yawned widely behind a hand. His exhaustion was clearly catching up with him.

"You all need sleep," Chuck said, snapping his fingers. "There, the sigils are gone. You have no excuse to delay your rest."

"Thanks," Nick said, concealing another yawn.

Chuck nodded and disappeared.

"Now sleep, both of you," Mary commanded. "Sam isn't going to be coming back here today, I'm sure. Let Castiel have his chance to talk to him, and we'll see where things stand tomorrow."

"Yeah, we all need rest, Nicky," Dean said when Nick looked like he wanted to argue. "If we do get a chance to speak to Sammy tomorrow, you want to be awake for it."

"You really think he'll be back that soon?" Nick asked.

A reassurance was on the tip of Dean's tongue, but then he bit his lip and said, "I don't know, man. I hope so. We've got to do this at his pace, and we've got to be ready for it to be tough."

As much as he wanted to have that same sense of reunion he'd had when he and Chuck had been alone with Sam, he knew it wasn't going to be like that straight away. Sam had been through too much and missed too much with them. They were going to have to find what they used to have again, and that was going to take time.

With only Magnus to deal with apart from the usual threats they faced on a daily basis as hunters, they were going to have that time.

So… That's Chuck got rid of for the foreseeable future. As fun as it is to write someone that evil, it's nice to get back to familiar characters again. Something big is coming in the next couple chapters. I've told a few of you about it already in replies, and now it's finally time. Sam is going to have an ally.

Until next time…

Clowns or Midgets xxx