You may have noticed MaggieMay19 is now listed as a co-author for this story. She has gone above and beyond as a beta until she was contributing as much as me to each chapter. This chapter is written completely by her. I think you'll really enjoy it. I did.

Jadey's World xxx

Chapter Twenty-Seven

Jack lay on his bed, staring at the ceiling. He, Nick and Dean had researched dreamwalkers into the small hours of the morning. They had found three national and seventy or so local or state-based professional bodies for psychics and related practitioners, whose combined membership totalled over a hundred thousand. There were over seventy trade conventions a year dedicated to the industry, with nine specialising in dreams or dream therapies. The Winchesters had contacted everyone they could think of for leads on real dreamwalkers, and Jack had signed back on to every dreamwalker-themed Internet forum he could find. They had cast a very wide net before calling it a day. Jack had gone to bed at the same time as Nick and Dean, though in truth his grace had regenerated sufficiently that he didn't feel tired.

Jack had lost Castiel before, when he was born. Back then, ignorant of everything but his primeval sadness he'd wanted, and Castiel had returned from the dead. This time things were different. Jack's depleted grace meant his raw power felt a fraction of what it had been, and anyway, Castiel had chosen to leave. No matter how much he wished and prayed, Castiel wasn't simply going to return to him.

Castiel's words, his drunkenness had bewildered Jack. He had thought he was doing the right thing when he returned with Mary, Dean and Nick. Jack had expected they would fix things with Castiel, but from that moment everything had gone horribly wrong. During the fight Castiel had barely looked at him, he hadn't even said goodbye. You have Jack, he'd said to Dean. Did Castiel believe Jack didn't want to be his son anymore? He had chosen Castiel!

You have Jack. Dean, Nick and Mary were like family, and it was true Jack would never again willingly leave them. He felt ashamed that he had been so dazzled by Lucifer's interest in him that he had seriously considered traveling the universe with the devil, leaving his adoptive family – even Castiel – to Michael's slender mercy. However, they left him all the time. The Winchesters went on hunts without him (Mary was away hunting right now) and every hunt carried the risk that they might never return. Or they would naturally grow old and die within what seemed to Jack a shockingly brief period of time. Jack needed Castiel, the angel was the only other immortal person that Jack knew. Yet that wasn't the whole story: Jack loved Castiel like a father. He missed him so much.

Jack's thoughts jumped from Castiel to Lucifer to Nick and Dean, Rowena, Sam, then back to Castiel himself. Jack's own behavior might not have been blameless, he could see that, but he couldn't think what he had done that was so bad it would make Castiel reject him so completely. Since his resurrection, Castiel hadn't been a constant presence in his life, but he had always been available to Jack whenever he needed him. Now he needed him and Castiel was trapped in a nightmare world, a war zone, a place angels succumbed so easily to death. The thought drove Jack to his feet, sent him wandering restlessly around the bunker.

He went to the spot in the library where he had first seen Castiel after the angel's resurrection. Because of me? he'd asked, and with something like fear in his voice Nick had said we don't know, Jack, but we think – maybe. Jack closed his eyes, reliving the first hug he'd ever gotten from the father he thought he had lost at birth, his heart full of longing and loss. Castiel had never been afraid of him.

With a jolt Jack suddenly felt Castiel's presence – not the memory but the faintest sensation of the angel himself. Jack's eyes flew open. There was no-one there, although the sensation remained. He moved away and it disappeared but when he stepped back there was Castiel again, insubstantial as a cloud but just as real. Jack closed his eyes once more. If he concentrated he could make the feeling stronger by turning around and extending his limbs to occupy the exact same space Castiel had filled. It was like enfolding himself in the love for Jack which Castiel had felt in that moment.

Tears prickled under Jack's eyelids. Castiel had loved Jack, then. Here was the proof. He strained his senses for more, and found a new direction where Castiel's presence felt even closer. He leaned towards it until suddenly it vanished.

Jack gasped at the loss and once more opened his eyes. He hadn't moved, not physically anyway. The sense of Castielhadreturned. He experimentally changed position, then, eyes still open, Jack once more reached out without moving. Castiel snapped into focus then maddeningly vanished again.

It took some practice to find where the impression of Castiel was strongest. Reaching out – no, reaching back in time, Jack realised – brought his father into focus, and it was strongest just before it vanished because that was the moment at which their first hug had taken place. Jack stopped thinking about it and simply stood, experiencing again his father's first embrace, until his whirling thoughts calmed, and sleepiness overtook him.

Nick knocked on Dean's bedroom door. It was a week later: Nick he had been waiting in the kitchen but Dean hadn't showed for breakfast.

"Dean, you awake? I think I found something." Dean was at his door before Nick even finished speaking.

"Dreamwalker?"

Nick's heart sank at the naked hope on Dean's face, but he pressed on. "Uh, no, a case."

"We have a case, finding a dreamwalker is the case," Dean replied flatly.

"Dean, you haven't left the bunker since we got back from Rufus' cabin. We've done all we can for now to help Jack narrow down his list, until he gets a decent lead we're just spinning our wheels. You won't talk about what happened with Cas or Sam and you spent all day yesterday stripping down every weapon in the place. Jack says it'll take him at least three days to work through his current batch of potentials. You can't take three more days of this."

Dean took a deep breath. The search was going much slower than he'd hoped. Their own contacts among hunters had been a bust. Jack had given them some tips and for the first few days they had helped him weed out hundreds obvious fakes or people with no pretensions to dreamwalking abilities, but Jack had to vet the others and the process took time. He saw the look in Nick's eyes, hopeful but wary, and relented. Nick was trying to help him deal with Sam's loss and his own frustrations in the only way he thought might work.

"What you got?"

"Fort Collins, Colorado. Three bodies turned up in the last two months, all with teeth marks on the bones. One, and I quote, 'eviscerated', the others were too decomposed to say for certain but looked as though they had organs missing, as well. Local PD are calling them animal attacks. Another five people went missing during the same time. Happened over the winter in Laramie, Wyoming – extra missing persons, some of them turned up dead, too, two with hearts missing. Both towns, the missing people all lived or were stopping in trailer parks. I'm thinking a werewolf in an Airstream."

"Awesome," muttered Dean. "You see whether Jack's wants to come along. Before I go anywhere, I need bacon."

"Sure, Dean," Nick replied, smiling. He turned, then called over his shoulder as he left to find Jack, "Oh, and you need a shower, too."

Nick was delighted it had taken so little persuading to get Dean to come out on a hunt. He was sure if he and Dean could just keep busy then Sam would fade, as he had before, to become nothing more than a painful memory. Jack missed Castiel but Nick was sure that would fade too, with time. Maybe it was already happening: Jack wasn't looking as ragged around the edges as Dean, though he was quieter than usual.

"Hey, Jack," Nick said as he entered the Library and found the kid there, busy at his laptop. "How's progress?"

"Slow," Jack replied, not really looking at him. "Last time I discovered that although the ability to dreamwalk is as common as other psychic abilities, people don't know that they have an ability. They think what they experience when they sleep is the same as everyone else. Once I find one real dreamwalker it should become easier. Dreamwalkers tend to know about at least a few other people like them. At the moment I seem to be finding a lot of people who are psychic but can't dreamwalk, or people who dreamwalk but not through natural ability. Or fakes. They're the hardest to eliminate, because it's hard to tell if someone is lying about their abilities until I meet them in person." Jack looked up now. "When you were psychic, did you ever dreamwalk?"

Nick felt uncomfortable. "We, uh, used African Dream Root for a case once, but…"

"No, I can't make a portal if the dreamwalking is caused by eating something or working a spell, rather than natural," Jack looked back to his screen. "I found that out pretty quickly last time. The link to other universes just isn't there."

"Sorry, Jack, I haven't had any abilities for a long time, dreamwalking wasn't ever one of them and, uh, they weren't exactly natural. I wasn't born with them."

"That's okay," Jack shrugged. "I'll keep looking."

Nick shook himself. "Jack, I found a case. Possible werewolf in Colorado. Dean and I were thinking of checking it out…"

"Yes, you should go. I'll stay here and put together a list of people we can visit when you get back," Jack said in his usual, mild way.

"Okay. Erm–"

"I'll be fine, Nick."

Disappointed but not surprised, Nick didn't press the issue. He figured he would work on Dean first. Jack would be easier to tackle once Dean gave up on the idea of a rescue mission and they could present a united front.

Jack took the opportunity of Nick and Dean's absence to find every place in the Bunker where Castiel shone through. As the days turned into weeks and still no dreamwalker, Nick and Dean went on two other hunts without him. In between they tracked down likely candidates, all of whom turned out to be dead ends: either not dreamwalkers at all, or people whose dreamwalking abilities were drug-induced.

Jack did continue his search for a dreamwalker, but he was also spending hours learning about Castiel from the feelings the angel had unwittingly impressed into the Bunker. Each had their own nuance of emotion, and Jack sought them out and drank them in. They were a comforting reminder of the father he had lost and a spur to Jack's effort to regain him. He didn't tell Nick or Dean. They missed Sam more than Castiel, Jack thought, and after their fight Dean might not like the idea that Castiel had left traces of himself all over their home. They might even want to find a spell or warding that would get rid of those traces.

Nick was overjoyed that Dean had agreed to start hunting again. It wasn't quite perfect – Mary was still away, poltergeists in the Florida Keys apparently, and Jack refused to come along – but for two of three days at a time it would be like old times for Nick. Better, even: these memories were his alone, not Sam's old recycled ones. When they both got lucky in Nebraska, Nick took it as a sign Dean was starting to let go of Sam, and indeed Dean never mentioned their brother during these hunts. True, Dean's mood would darken whenever they returned from visiting another not-dreamwalker, but Nick felt even that would lessen over time. Nick wasn't sure about Jack, the kid had a special bond with Castiel, but Jack was young and Nick, guiltily, waited for a sign that time and absence had started working their magic on him, too.

Nick and Dean had gotten back from their latest hunt in the small hours. Nick headed straight to his room and dropped onto his bed, asleep almost before his head hit the pillow. Dean made it to his room before he remembered his gun was out of ammo. He hadn't slept without a loaded gun to hand since he was twelve. With a soft groan Dean pushed himself up and headed down to the armory.

On the way back to his room Dean heard a small noise somewhere in the Bunker. Dean quietly chambered a round, fully awake now, then crept towards the sound. Cautiously rounding a corner he was astonished to see Jack in the library, standing very still with his eyes shut, his arms out as though he was hugging an invisible person.

"Jack?"

Jack opened his eyes and dropped his arms with a guilty start.

"What's going on?" Dean asked.

"I'm not doing time travel," Jack said quickly. Dean's confusion grew.

"Okay..."

"It does involve time, though. Sort of. It's hard to explain."

"Try me," Dean replied.

"I found places in the Bunker where I can sense Castiel's presence. They're like memories or photographs but more… real, I guess. I, um, don't go back in time, but I feel back in time. To when Castiel stood here. And gave me a hug." Jack's voice grew smaller and he hung his head. "Because I miss him, and I want him back. I'm sorry. I know you're angry with him."

Dean's heart broke a little for Jack, then. It was easy to forget that Jack was so much younger than he looked. He had caught Jack taking what little human comfort he could get from hugging the solid memory of Cas – or whatever – and Jack even felt bad for doing it. Dean knew Jack was sad about Castiel leaving but the kid always sounded so matter-of-fact when he talked, as though nothing really affected him. In any case, Dean realized guiltily, his thoughts had been all about Sam, not Cas. It had simply been easier for him to believe Jack wasn't so messed up than to check in properly with the kid.

"Jack. It's okay for you to miss Cas."

"Castiel was so angry with us, wasn't he? With me." Jack looked disconsolate. "I don't know what I did but I think it must have been very wrong."

"You didn't do anything wrong, Jack," Dean said seriously. "The spell Magnus did – it messed us all up so bad that Sam felt he needed to get away from us for a while. Cas… I guess he must have thought Sam needed him more than we do." Dean felt ashamed he had left Jack to his own devices. The hunts with Nick had been so comforting, but they were band aids over a gaping wound. The solution lay in getting Sam and Castiel back from Apocalypse World.

"We just need to... We'll find a dreamweaver, go find Sam and Cas, and bring them home. We'll fix this," Dean said, with more conviction in his voice than he felt inside. Then an idea struck him. "And I know who can help."

Dean had called Rowena more than twenty times before she picked up the phone.

"Dean Winchester, it's half past four in the morning and I don't want to talk to you. Why can't you take a hint?"

"We need your help, Rowena."

"Of course you do, to bring Lucifer Two back from that other world."

"You know about that?"

"I have my sources," Rowena replied smugly, "but the answer is no. In case you've forgotten, I was trying to get rid of him last time we met. My sentiments haven't changed. Stop calling me."

"Rowena, wait! He isn't Lucifer, it's Sam –"

"Spare me the details, Dean. I know who I see when I look at him. Nothing you can say will change my mind."

Dean looked across at Jack and put the phone on speaker.

"Maybe so, but Jack wants a word."

"Hello, Rowena," Jack said before she could speak.

"Jack," Rowena acknowledged guardedly.

"Castiel went with Sam. He's gone too."

Rowena snorted. "Castiel is no friend of mine."

"Did you know that before I was born I could perceive things going on around me? I guess it has something to do with what I am, my intrinsic power," Jack began. When Rowena raised no objections he kept talking. "When I started growing inside my mom I discovered she was a good person. She was kidnapped by something very bad. Then angels came, not to rescue her but to kill me. They knew the worst bad thing was Lucifer, and he was my father, and they were so afraid. Of me. They were sure I was the worst bad thing ever. One of the angels found my mom and he knew he had to kill her in order to destroy me – but he couldn't do it. Instead in his kindness and mercy he rescued my mom from the bad thing. He felt he had failed, but all I could feel from him was his goodness. He was full of love for the world and for people. He believed I was bad, and that killing me was the only way to protect the people he loved, but still he couldn't bring himself to murder my mom to do it. She was innocent and it would have been wrong."

"How nice for her. I don't see what that has to do with me."

"That angel was Castiel. He made me want to be good, like him, so I asked Castiel if he would be my father instead of Lucifer. And he said yes. And now he's gone. And I miss him. So much."

On the other end of the line Rowena sighed deeply. "Bollocks."

Dean seized the opportunity.

"Rowena, we need to find a dreamwalker. Do you have a way to do that?"

There was a long pause, then Rowena said, "Yes, fine. Can you meet me in California?"

"We'll be there in two days."

"There'll be a price," Rowena warned.

Jack looked at Dean, his eyes full of hope and trepidation.

"There always is," Dean said grimly.

Hi this is MaggieMay19, I was doing beta work for this story when two things occurred to me. Jadey's World thought the ending was approaching rather faster than she liked; and I realised that we hadn't yet explored Jack's point of view regarding Castiel's choice to leave. This chapter is the result. Jack is missing Castiel very much, Dean is climbing the walls and Nick is discovering that even if his schemes to keep his new family seem to be working out, he may not be able to bear seeing Dean and Jack pay the price of his machinations. What do you think? Thanks JW for letting me collaborate with your fabulous story.