Title: Most Important Thing

Author: Mika Chan 55

Spoilers: Nine

Pairings: Cam/Hunter

Warnings: Boy/Boy love, Character death

Summary: Grief is the agony of an instant, the indulgence of grief the blunder of a life.Benjamin Disraeli (1804 – 1881)

My dull, wet eyes stare at the coffin containing my love after I have given my speech to the crowd. I give a watery sigh as my mind pictures how Cam looked when he finally passed on.

Two weeks after I allowed myself to realize how tired my Asian lover truly was.

"Hunter,"

I look up and focus in on my brother,and finally notice everyone else leaving. Blake pulls me into a hug and I release my sorrow as I openly sobwhile I clutch to my brother tightly. Arms wrap around the two of us and I take to offered comfort from the others until I am able to pull away.

"Please, take me home," I comment pitifully and we head silently to Tori's van.

Days turn into weeks and weeks into months. A month and a half after Cam's death has me still unable to get on with my life.

I sit in my room, on the bed, staring dully at nothing. My stomach grumbles and I force myself up to my feet and out of my room at Blake and Tori's house.

"Hey Hunter," Tori greets me and I give her a strain smile in response, "You hungry?"

"Yeah," I sit down at the table and rub my face wearily, "Where's Blake? I thought he was in,"

"He's in the shower,"

My brow scrunches in thought, something is wrong about that statement, but I end up just shoving it up and over to the side. Tori and I eat in silence and once I finish she takes the plate as I head back to my room.

Entering the dim lit room, I spot an envelope on my pillow. I sit down and pick it up, just to drop it upon recognizing Cam's writing. My breath quickens as my shaking hand re-pick it up. I carefully open it and pull out the note. Blinking to clear my vision of the sudden wetness I start to read.

Hey Love,

If you get this I did indeed get worse and died and your brother believes you've grieved long enough. Hunter, my love, please don't lose your life from my death. There are a few things I want to tell you and I don't know if I'll have a chance if I do get worse, like I feel I will. 1) I don't regret anything in my life, other than that in my death I will be leaving you behind. 2) Don't give up on your life wallowing in grief. Please love, go and start living. If not for yourself, than for me. Live for the both of us. 3) If you meet someone else, than go with them with no regret. 4) I love you with all my heart and if you join me before your time I will kick your ass.

Love you, Cam

I chuckle at the last sentence. The chuckling turns into sobs and I clutch the last piece of Cam to my chest as I curl up into a ball.

I'll grieve for you this last day love, and then I'll start living for us both.

TBC…