A/N: It's here! the penultimate chapter to our long and winding road. Here we go with the crazy twists and turns of Love.

Desperation

Last Chapter:-

It was another beautiful summertime day in Hillridge, the view from the edge of the cliffs was great. Gordo was sat on his favourite rock at the sloping edge, thinking about what he was about to do.

Suddenly he heard the one thing he didn't want to hear right now. He heard the distant sound of footsteps and a voice.

"David Gordon... where the hell have you been?"

Gordo slowly turned around, his face without emotion. Inside, Gordo was tor apart, unable to think straight through his depression.

"-Hey" Muttered Gordo.

"-Where have you been?" Said an angry Lizzie, walking up to him and sitting by his side on the rock. Gordo moved away a little.

"Studying." Gordo lied.

"Well, what's going on?" Lizzie asked, resting her head in her hands. After a moment of silence, Lizzie asked another question. "So, how are you?"

"Good." Gordo lied again. Lizzie nodded, but didn't seem convinced. Gordo pretended to look frustrated, "And busy."

"Yeah. Me too.", Lizzie sighed. "I'm all done. So I guess it's goodbye freshman, and hello, Sophmore for Lizzie McGuire." She said, smiling.

They both hung their heads, not knowing what to say to eachother. A few seconds of silence passed.

"You wana..go do something?" Lizzie said, perking up.

That was the last thing Gordo wanted. He wanted nothing more to do with his best friend right now. He knew how hard it would be for him to hang out with her when she thought nothing was wrong and he knew that he loved her and would never get the feeling in return.

Gordo shook his head. "No... You know, I should really get back to studying." He said, getting up and starting to walk away.

"Okay..." Lizzie frowned. What is going on with him right now, she wondered.

Gordo turned back. "So, I guess I'll see you around." and he turned back again towards the pathway out of the cove they were in.

"I heard you were going to England, Gordo." Lizzie whispered, and he started to walk away again. Gordo quickly noticed the sadness in her voice and couldn't fight his best friend urges to comfort her. He turned back the other way. Again.

"Yeah. I'm gone in a few days." He said.

Lizzie shut all her sadness away and tried to be happy for him. "When's your last exam? I mean, do you wana go celebrate or something? You wana--"

"Uh, no, I'm leaving right after it, so--" Gordo quickly interupted.

"Okay...well, I guess we'll talk soon." Lizzie muttered.

Gordo gave her a look of fake positivity, and turned to to walk away...

"What's going on?" Lizzie said, but much louder and more anxious.

"-What?..." Gordo replied, equally as loud.

"What, This, What is this thing you got going on?" Lizzie shouted, desperate.

"I don't know, Nothing's going on!"

Lizzie smirked a slight bit, getting angry. "Really? because I spoke to Miranda the other day, and she told me that you broke up with her...Is that what this is about? Because I thought I told you not to tell her about what happened?"

"Yeah, I know." Said Gordo, all the anger and self pity coming up to the surface inside of him.

"Then...Are you upset? are you--"

"-No!" Gordo started to sob a little. But not enough for Lizzie to see that he was.

"So what's going on?"

"I don't know!" Shouted Gordo. "Things are differant.-"

"-But I thought we talked about that.", Lizzie rose up from the rock so she was nearly at head height with Gordo, stood a little further down the cove as he was. "Gordo, I thought we said that we didn't want anything to be differant...I thought we said that having sex was just a huge mistake and...I mean, that was weeks ago now. I thought we'd go back to just being friends, I thought that we would just-"

Gordo started to get very angry. He stepped down off of the path, and walked closer to Lizzie. "-Why was it a mistake?"

"What?"

"You and me. Why was that a mistake? I'm curious."

Lizzie sighed. "We've already talked about it. What, do you wana go over it again, Do you wana-"

"-No, you want to talk? then let's talk!" Hissed Gordo.

"Was it a mistake because anything that comes close to real intimacy freaks you out?...Or just that I'm not good enough for you?"

Lizzie suddenly realised what was going on. "Gordo, you kissed me, and I responded...But I wouldn't have done it if I knew it was going to end our friendship."

"And neither would I." Said Gordo, looking miserable.

"Gordo, if I could take it all back I would."

"Take it. It's yours." Uttered Gordo, a lone tear falling down his cheek. "Put it on the shelf with all your other one night stands."

Lizzie stepped back, looking hurt. "Why are you doing this?"

Gordo stepped a little closer to Lizzie so they were only a few feet away from eachother. "Look, that night was as much a surprise to me as it was to you.", He took in a breath. "But being with you was like going to a place I have never been before... and after you fell asleep, I just laid there, staring at those cheap fluorescent stars on your ceiling, and... after a while, they just started to form a pattern. This crazy glow-in-the-dark pattern that linked together our entire relationship, when we were in elementary school holding hands to walk into the first day of school, the day we started middle school, the graduation day, that night on the roof in Italy...", Gordo started to sob. "And for the first time, everything seemed clear to me. It felt like you and I were the greatest thing ever made, and I had nothing to do with it!" Gordo wiped some tears from his eyes.

"Being with you made me feel like maybe I didn't have to keep planning ahead anymore...because it felt like I was actually Living!, and for once in my entire life, I wouldn't have to work so hard at being happy...that it could just happen."

Gordo frowned at Lizzie's dumstruck face, and shook his head in pain. "NOTHING will ever hurt me as much as your reaction to that same experience."

Lizzie was just stood there, feeling very sorry for Gordo, before she spoke. "Gordo, I..."

"What? You wana go hang out at the library and pretend nothing ever happened?... well, sorry, but I can't do that."

A few moments of nothing but silence ensued. Lizzie frowned, "I'm, sorry. I don't know what to say...Gordo, I can't offer you anything other than my friendship. I thought that would be enough."

"Look, you don't have to say anything...I have to go." and Gordo walked a fair speed across the path, and into his car, and drove away.

Lizzie and Miranda were stood outside Lizzie's house, both crying. Lizzie had decided to spend her summer at Gammy McGuire's, to get over everything. But, Miranda in her heart knew that Lizzie would probably never come back to Hillridge. Gordo was gone, and Lizzie was just depressed as Gordo had been when he had called earlier in the month.

Lizzie and Miranda unloaded the last suitcase onto the truck heading out, and they both hugged the other tightly. "I'm gona miss you so much." muttered Miranda, through her tears.

"I'm gona miss you too, Randa."

They broke the hug, and Miranda pulled Lizzie in for another in desperation to hold onto her best friend, when Larry casually walked around the corner to Lizzie's street. "Lizzie?"

Lizzie turned around. "-Hey."

"Where are you going?-" He wondered.

"I'm going to my relatives for a while."

"Right now?" Larry asked, in his usual annoying way, that made Miranda laugh. "Larry, there's a truck right here, of course now." She said, laughing again.

The truck driver got out, looking at his watch. "Miss? we'd better get going. I've got other people in here wanting to get going ASAP."

Lizzie nodded, and turned back to Larry. "How are you Gordo's exams going?-"

"-Good.Good...They're goin good."

"He's doing Okay?"

"Yeah, He's doing great-...he really couldn't be doing bet..." Larry paused, and cringed. "Okay... that's a lie. He's in love with someone who's not in love with him. How do you think he is?"

The truck driver pointed into the back, where five more people were waiting to get going. "Are we gona go?"

Lizzie, realising that she was holding up the trip, pulled Miranda in for another hug. "I love you..."

"I love you too, Liz. Good luck." Miranda replied, And Lizzie jumped into the truck with her travel bag.

It had been ten minutes since Lizzie had got into the truck to leave Hillridge, and she looked to the person sitting next to her, and the woman smiled cheerfully. "Going away for the summer?"

"Yeah...I just graduated freshman year."

The woman nodded. "Congratulations. So what are you doing in here? shouln't you be out with your friends? or your boyfriend?"

Lizzie frowned. "Um... I have no idea... and I don't have a boyfriend. Well, not really."

"Oh. well don't worry, I spent four years out of high school looking for the right guy. I never realised that the answer was always stnading right in front of me. I never noticed him, but the guy who would always look out for me, the one that was my closest friend, helped me through those hard times."

Lizzie smiled. "Really?"

"Really. We graduated from high school, and I finally realised that the one thing I had been looking for was right in front of my nose. Don't get scared. You'll end up figuring out what exactly you want." The woman finished.

Lizzie frowned, and looked out of the wndow. A tear came down her cheek as she saw the cove that her and Gordo had talked on, shining in the sunlight down in the bay.

"Was it a mistake because anything that comes close to real intimacy freaks you out?"

Lizzie undid her seatbelt. "Stop the truck!" she shouted.

The driver turned round. "I can't stop the truck, we're on a bridge, lady."

"-Just pull over now! cause I'm getting out!" Lizzie shouted again.

Lizzie jumped out of the truck, and pulled down a cab.

And if I don't say the words

How will you hear what's inside my heart

She reached Gordo's house, ran up to the door as fast as she could as Mr.Gordon was coming out. She ran straight past him into the house and all the way up the staris to Gordo's room.

"-Gordo!" She shouted, as she swung open the door to find no one there.

How will you know, babe...

"NOTHING will ever hurt me as much as your reaction to that same experience."

If I don't tell you now.

Lizzie started to cry, as she stood in an empty room.

"Randa?" Lizzie said, as she slipped herself through Miranda's bedroom door.

"Wha-what are you doing here Lizzie?"

Lizzie started to sob again. "I dunno...I just-"

"Oh... what's wrong Liz?" Asked Miranda, seeing her best friend with tears on her face.

"Randa... did you ever get the feeling that the one thing you ever wanted was just-" Lizzie stopped when she heard a noise coming from Miranda's bathroom.

"Is someone here?"

"Yeah..." Said Miranda, smiling. "But that doesn't matter...What's wrong?"

"Randa? Who's here?" The door slowly opened, and out came Larry Tudgeman, in a bathrobe, looking very pleased with himself.

"Larry?" said Lizzie, utterly confused and surprised. Then...Lizzie realised something. She quickly jumped out of her seat. "Larry!"

"Larry? Where's Gordo?"

"He's on his way to England." answered Tudge. Lizzie frowned, and looked over to Miranda for comfort. Larry rapidly tapped Lizzie on the shoulder. "I think...he was catching the four o'clock plane, Liz." he said, smiling.

Lizzie looked over to the clock on Miranda's bedside. three thirty. "Oh my god!" She anxiously shouted, and opened the door. "Which airline?"

"Sky Southwest." Larry replied, still smiling.

"Great! Thankyou so much Tudge!" Shouted Lizzie, running out of the door and towards her waiting cab driver. She flung herself into the passenger seat.

"Hillridge Airport! And I'll pay you double to get me there before Four o'clock!" Lizzie literally screamed into the drivers face.

"Yes Mam!" and he stepped as hard as he could on the acceleration.

A/N: Yeah baby. I almost feel cruel to leave you on such a MASSIVE cliffhanger. Will she make it? won't she? You'll have to wait and see. Read nad Review. Reviews make me want to write faster, so anyone who reads this, review it! Even if you don't normally review, review it for the good of the masses!

DearLizzie