Mixed Signals by Posh & Stoneygem

Part 19

A knot in your stomach wasn't the best feeling in the world, especially not on a plane that was about to take off. Clarisse shifted nervously in her seat fiddling with the clasp of her seatbelt. Hopefully, the other passengers in the first class cabinwouldn't recognise her and realize that she was a puddle of nervousness.

What if what she did was wrong? What if she disturbed him? What if he didn't really want her to come? What if he was angry with her for not going with him right away?

He had been right, it had been so easy to rearrange her schedule. Mia had been so happy about her plan that she would have probably cleared her diary for the next six months. It wasn't work that held her back, it was her own fear. But fear was difficult to overcome. Though she was working on it. Hopefully, it wouldn't go wrong.

'Stop it, Clarisse' she chastised herself. 'Pulling yourself down will help nothing. He asked you time and again to join him. He'll be happy, when you show up. Better late than never. He loves you, he misses you and you feel the same. It will go well.'

"Ladies and gentlemen, we are now ready for take off. Please, turn off all electronic devices, put your chairs into upright position and fasten your seatbelts. We hope you do have a pleasant flight."

'Funny, how is it that those public planes never make you feel welcome.' She mused.

As the plane to Vienna took off, the former queen settled back against the back of her chair and closed her eyes to concentrate on happy thoughts. She wasn't too eager on flying and especially detested take-off and landing. From experience she knew that happy thoughts would help her through.

Usually, over the years she had thought about… about… Gods, had there never been a time, when she had not been thinking of him in the last twenty years? Oh Joseph, how could it be - to fall so deep and so irrevocably? He was her fate, she knew this, had accepted it a long time ago. To think that she had come so close to losing it. No. No! …No! They were so perfect together and she would make sure they wouldn't lose it again.

Vienna was just the right place for it. And her suitcase contained just the right things to help along. Hopefully…

The memory came unbidden and Clarisse couldn't help but cringe at it. His anger, his incredulousness, his fury. What if he really didn't like to see her in sexy lingerie anymore? Granted she had made sure that she had no items with her that were too risky, but she knew Vienna and she would have time to shop and… Another memory came into her mind. The blood red piece, he had been so angry about. She had never found it again and she was certain the maids hadn't taken it to the laundry. Where had it gone to?

She was shaken from her reverie by the gentleman standing next to her.

"Your majesty…" he whispered bending down. "Is everything acceptable?"

She glanced up at him, straightening herself in the plush seat a little. "Yes, everything's fine."

She resisted the urge to tell him to leave her alone and not under any circumstances refer to her as 'majesty' again on the flight. She understood the need to have security; Joseph would never forgive her if she flew over alone on a public flight. Yet somehow even having the one security guard's surveillance seemed a slight invasion on her privacy, an invasion on the life that right now she wanted to side step.

"I'm fine, think I might read for a while." She smiled sweetly at him and he left her alone, returning to his seat across the aisle from her.

Ahh well, in a few hours she would be in the hotel alone with Joseph, and it was certainly an experience flying like this instead of on the official plane. Actually it was rather nice, having that freedom. Well as much freedom as one could have being royalty.

Closing her eyes she shut her mind off from the hum of chatter around her and let herself drift to sleep.

"Ladies and gentlemen, we are preparing to land. Please, turn off all electronic devices, return chairs into an upright position and fasten your seatbelts. On behalf of all the crew I'd like to thank you for flying with us today and we hope you've had a pleasant flight."

Clarisse couldn't help but smile as the captain's voice drifted into her sleep induced mind. Joseph always made fun about them, that deep gravely voice travelling over the tannoy, that self-assured importance. In fact he did a damn good impression of captain's speak when provoked.

Clipping her seatbelt together Clarisse smoothed her skirt a little and glanced down at her crossed legs. That morning when she'd dressed it had taken her three outfits before she felt content with her choice, for some unfathomable reason she found she was nervous, and quite desperate to choose an outfit that was not only comfortable to travel in but that would catch her husband's eye when he saw her. In the end she'd gone for a cream coloured dress, it finished at her knee and had a wonderful loose elegant feel about it, a skirt with a slight flair. A simple long jacket and a scarf embroidered with tiny pink flowers and she was set. She certainly hoped she didn't stand out in any way; sunglasses were the order of the day though she didn't often wear them.

She couldn't help but smile as she caught sight of her shoes, Mia had given them to her as a 'gift' several months ago and it was the first time Clarisse had actually worn them. Her granddaughter argued that Clarisse needed to "get with the fashion" and wear Jimmy Choos. Clarisse had argued she was no longer young enough to be with any fashion but had reluctantly agreed to them. As it turned out they were very comfortable and did look rather good with the dress. Yes, Joseph would be impressed she mused glancing out the window to the approaching city.

A car was waiting and within twenty minutes Clarisse found herself being ushered into the hotel. She rather hated the fuss going on about her but as always was poised and elegance itself as she shook hands and greeted staff members. The Sachar was somewhere she'd stayed before, and it always amused her that they gave her the Madame Butterfly suite.

As she stepped from the elevator she was welcomed by no other than Frances Sagan, who gleefully smiled at her and shook her hand a little too vigorously.

"Your majesty."

"Please, I'm not the Queen any longer." She smiled retrieving her hand. "Mrs. Romerro will be fine for this trip I think." She glanced around her wondering how long she would have to remain in conversation with this rather over enthusiastic gentleman.

"Well…" he grinned. "Your 'husband' is just finishing off in a meeting. Though I have informed him of your arrival."

Clarisse mentally kicked herself at his comment, it was supposed to be a surprise, a surprise she wanted to see through. Nevermind.

"Shall I escort you to your suite?"

"Actually I think I'd rather like to see the conference room, I assume that's where my husband is."

"Why yes, I believe he is."

"Thank you."

The short fellow obediently escorted her down the hallway and through a series of glass doors. She felt she had to physically restrain herself from running, honestly, a few days apart and she's this eager to see him again. Goodness.

They passed the majority of the group en route to the conference suite and Clarisse noted how several nodded to her before engaging in a little gossip as they headed away. 'Let them gossip', she thought ruefully.

As she entered the room Joseph had his back to her, looking out over the city, several well dressed gentleman remained in the room talking and she could tell from his stance he didn't fully appreciate their words.

One of them glanced up as she entered and a broad smile crossed his face. She recognised him immediately.

"Clarisse my dear…" He smiled as he moved across to her; she offered her hand which he kissed. "You look wonderful as always."

"Thank you Stephan, it's good to see you too."

Now she looked towards Joseph, he was smiling absently at her, taking in the scene, taking in her appearance.

She crossed towards him and he met her halfway, taking her hand and squeezing it as he politely kissed her cheek, they were in company after all.

"Thank you for coming." He whispered in her ear.

"Well." She smiled glancing around at the remaining group. "I'm intrigued to find out just how you gentleman are running our education system these days."

She felt his hand on the small of her back, oh how she'd missed that, as he guided her around the room and introduced her to the other members. Finally the room emptied and they were able to escape, only Frances remained and her security guard. The energetic organiser babbled on as they took the elevator to their suite and she was rather glad he wouldn't be organising anything for her!

Joseph knew how to handle him though and she was impressed by how smoothly and politely he dismissed him as they finally emerged in their suite.

Taking a deep breath Clarisse slid off her jacket as she made her way to the huge windows that looked out over the city.

"Such a beautiful day." She said gently.

She felt Joseph behind her; he took her jacket and hung it on a chair before returning to stand behind her. She turned quickly.

"Are you surprised?" She bit down on her bottom lip, somewhat nervous as it turned out.

"Wonderfully, and pleased."

"Good."

His hands rested on her bare shoulders and he tilted his head forward his lips gently brushing hers. "Darling, you look simply ravishing…" He emphasised his point by circling her waist and lifting her up, she felt her shoes slip off as she instinctively gripped his back.

"Ahh, Joseph…"

He was kissing her neck as he spun her round growling unfathomable words against her skin.

She pressed down on his shoulders, helplessly giggling. She didn't realise he would be this pleased to see her.

"Joseph, put me down."

"Mmm," he kissed her neck again though returned her feet to the floor. She felt his hands roaming over her body, hungrily taking in every inch of her.

"I guess you missed me." She smiled when he finally stopped and stroked her face with his thumb.

"Perhaps a little." He was grinning like some kind of idiot yet he couldn't help it. "I can't believe you actually came, I thought… well it doesn't matter what I thought, you're here, and simply gorgeous. Let's parade around the hotel so that I can show you off."

"Show me off, my how times have changed." She kissed his mouth, slowly and sensually, pressing her body against his. "I need a shower and a cup of tea."

"In that order?"

"Yes, you know I hate to fly."

"I know. You go take your shower and I'll order tea."

"Oh, I was rather hoping that…" She loosened his tie slipping it off. "That Mr. Romerro would wash my back."

"Oh you were… well what if Mr. Romerro has already showered once today?"

"Then I think he should indulge his wife's whims. It will prove very beneficial to him."

"Well, I've never known you to be wrong."

She kissed his nose. "That's because I never am. Now, come along dear…"

"I'd like to cover you in ice-cream and lick it off." Joseph whispered in Clarisse's ear as they stood beneath the hot water. "Lick each inch of you until you're moaning my name."

"Any specific taste you would prefer, dear?"

"Can't go wrong with Vanilla, the expensive kind though, pure... nothing less for your skin." He nipped her ear loving how she giggled and moved against him.

"Vanilla? A bit boring don't you think?" She replied breathlessly, pulling his hands forward so that his body rested closer against hers.

"Oh I'd make it interesting..." he mumbled as she rubbed her body against his. "Mmm, you smell so good." He buried his face in her hair. "And feel so good." Her hand folded with his and he rested his chin on her shoulder. "Thank you."

She turned her head slightly, feeling his breath against her cheek and the corner of her mouth. Such a simple thing and yet it was the most glorious feeling in the world. "For what?"

"Coming here to be with me."

"How could I not?" She turned in his arms and cupped his cheek. "I missed you. Joseph, I don't know, I just missed you so much. I felt as if I could not stand another day without you, so I came here."

"I'm glad..." He kissed her forehead. "Oh Clarisse, these past few months..."

She shook her head, placing a finger on his lips to silence him. "Don't say it. I know how close we were to lose ourselves. To lose us." She moved suggestively against him and smiled. "But I realized something along the way and you better realize this now: You are stuck with me. For better or for worse. I won't let you go. Ever!"

"Well..." he sucked in a breath as he folded his arms around her. "I guess that's something I'm just going to have to get used to."

She laughed at that. "You better do so." Leaning forward she caught his mouth in a tender kiss that quickly grow more and more heated. Getting lost in the feelings swirling through her body as his hands roamed over her skin, it took her a while until a beeping sound registered.

Joseph barely registered Clarisse's voice, saying his name, repeating his name. How he loved to hear that... the way she would moan his name urging him on... her hands were pressing against his shoulders, actually she was being rather forceful.

"Joseph. Joseph! Somebody is at the door."

"Oh not now, not now…" He devoured her mouth again a hand cupping her breast.

She arched into his hands, a low keening sound escaping her. Yet, the beeping sound resounded again through the room and this time she just couldn't ignore it. "Oh bother!"

Joseph felt her palms against his chest pushing him back from her. "Don't stop now, Clarisse…" he implored as she reached for a towel.

She grimaced in disappointment. "I wish I could." She placed a finger on his lips. "But somebody desperately wants to talk to you. You are the important person here." Her voice took on a teasing tone. "I am just a tourist."

"Mmm, well, perhaps people should understand that a man needs to make love to his wife every now and then. Whether he's important or not." He reluctantly stepped out of the shower and took the robe she handed him.

"Somehow I doubt this Mr. Sagan will ever find himself in such a situation." She chuckled as she reached for the other robe.

"I'm not sure his boyfriend would agree."

Clarisse couldn't help but burst out laughing. "His boyfriend?" she asked incredulously.

"My dear you must learn to be more astute, it's blatantly obvious. Now, am I sufficiently covered up to greet him without blushing?"

"Who would blush? You or him?"

"Ha, you're funny, did anyone ever tell you that." He kissed her cheek watching as she wrapped an extra large towel around herself. "Don't go anywhere."

She gave him a cheeky grin. "Too bad. I actually planned to go down to the souvenir shop just now. I am a tourist after all. I need to prove I was here."

"Save it for tomorrow, I have back to back meetings." He quipped as he exited the bathroom and headed through the suite to answer the insistent knocking.

Clarisse chuckled after the door had closed behind him. Then with a sigh she turned around and stared at her reflection in the slightly steamy mirror.

She wiped the surface of the mirror clean and stared at herself resting her hands on the marbled top. She was practically glowing. She noticed Joseph standing behind her.

"Something wrong dear?" He said as he touched her shoulder.

"Wrong?" A tremulous smile crossed her face. "Wrong?" She slowly turned and too a step closer to him. He looked at her with concern. She ran a fingertip over his profile and finally launched herself into his arms. "No," she breathed, "everything is just so perfect."

"Ohh." He caught her body, somewhat off guard, and returned her hug. "Well I'm afraid I'm going to have to ruin the perfect moment. It seems a hastily arranged dinner is in order…" he pulled back slightly to look at her face. "I do believe the official word is so you can meet everybody. Though personally I think it's because they all wish to flirt with you."

Her smile was still watery, but it brightened nonetheless. "Well, they will have no success. I intend to flirt with only one man tonight."

"And he intends to make the most of it and show you off... so best dress sweetheart."

"Best dress?" Clarisse raised an eyebrow. "Joseph, you do remember what they say, right? Careful what you wish for..."

He lifted her chin with his finger. "One wish was already granted today… I can't tell you how glad I am to have you here, I'll fix my schedule so we have as much time together as possible, we'll do whatever you want, I'll even give in to shopping."

She just couldn't resist the slightly evil grin that crossed her features at his promise. Going shopping with her? She could see, he already knew he would regret it, but right now it didn't matter. Nothing mattered. They were together. In this glorious town and without the usual scrutiny. They could do whatever they want. "I'd love to," she said hugging him close.

Pulling back again she shot him a questioning look. "Do we a have a little time for a short walk before the dinner? It's so nice out there and the city so beautiful..."

"As long as you put that wonderful dress back on I'll walk anywhere with you."

The late afternoon was indeed glorious. The sun was still high up in the sky, but the red-golden hues it cast over the roofs of the inner city already spoke of the quickly approaching nightfall. The air was balmy and filled with chatter of the many tourists meandering through the cobblestone streets of Vienna's inner city.

Nobody took notice of the couple strolling arm in arm along the Graben, and if they did then only to notice how handsome a couple they were. The woman in a cream-coloured dress with a matching cardigan, the man in a tailored suit though sans the tie and with the jacket hanging from his free arm. To the close observer they looked familiar, despite their sunglasses, yet their most obvious feature was the happiness they exuded.

"I never realized how free one could feel even among so many other people." She said with a happy sigh. "It is wonderful."

He smiled broadly at her and leaned over to place a quick kiss on her nose. "It is because we are alone with ourselves here. Nobody cares who we are. It's just us. And right now, this is the most beautiful place on earth."

"And to think that you don't like this town." She teased gently, squeezing his hand affectionately, while she turned to take a closer look at the "Pestsäule"

She was right about that. It wasn't their first trip to Vienna. Clarisse being the opera lover she was and generally being a queen and thus a celebrity had visited the Austrian capital on a regular basis. For Joseph, being her head of security, those trips always had been a nightmare. Vienna was a nightmare.

Old, medieval, morbid – the town was horrendous for any security man. Those narrow cobblestone streets, constantly full of tourists and cars and carriages. So many niches, nooks and crannies that had to be taken into account for one single venture outside the hotel. The "Sachar" itself was a security nightmare. Narrow flights of stairs, constantly overcrowded, a celebrity itself. He had certainly disliked this town on earlier visits. However, since he was no longer a security man, but could actually enjoy all the luxuries and beauties this place had to offer…

Her gentle, happy voice shook him out of his musings. "Joseph, where are you?"

He smiled at her and with sudden giddiness coming over him; he swept her into his arms and whirled her around, not caring about the many people who might be watching them.

She laughed; delighted and happy, it made his heart soar every time.

"Put me down." She demanded laughing. He only held her tighter and whirled her around faster, being caught in the moment and the momentum. "Joseph, please stop, I'm getting dizzy."

That stopped him and he slowly put her down again, still holding her tightly against him.

She looked into his eyes, so full of love and happiness, while he got lost in the sparkle of utter bliss in hers. "You are crazy." She whispered against his lips before kissing him gently.

"Yes," he whispered back, "crazy with happiness. Gods, I never thought we would have this again."

Leaning her forehead against his, she whispered: "I never thought, I would ever have this."

He cupped her cheek lovingly. "Oh Clarisse, I love you so much. Te quiero mucho. Usted es mi vida, mi amor, mi diosa, mi toda. Usted está por todas partes - en mi mente, en mi corazón, en mi sueño, uniforme en mis pesadillas. Entonces me atierro que despierto y le van. Que tengo que vivir mi vida sin usted " He didn't even realize that he had slipped into his native tongue. His heart was quelling over and he just had to tell her all that was running through his mind.

Tears began to gather in her eyes at his words and she put her hands on his face and pulled him close for a passionate kiss. Putting all the love, all the passion she had for him into this kiss, the embrace quickly became heated. Responding to her insistent touch his arms around her back pulled her tighter against him as they lost themselves in their love.

People were walking by smiling at the couple so oblivious to the fact that they were standing on a crowded street, between throngs of passers-by. Oblivious to the clicking camera capturing their happiness for good money. Oblivious to the young street musician, who came closer and started to sing a love song from an operetta. Oblivious to the time passing by.

Only the desperate need for breath finally pulled them apart. He tenderly wiped away the traces of a tear that had fallen down her cheek, as they smiled at each other brilliantly.

Applause behind them returned them to the real world. Slightly embarrassed they turned around for the source of the clapping and found themselves surrounded by a few smiling people and a young man singing the final notes of a love song, all of them applauding them.

Clarisse stared at the people in bewilderment, then realization hit. With a groan she buried her face in Joseph's chest, feeling his chest rumble as he chuckled. Burying his face in her hair, he tried to hide his blush. So much for not being the centre of attention.

Her face an interesting shade of crimson, Clarisse peeked out from her hiding place. But all she could see where those indulgent smiles on the faces of those people. "I guess we better leave, or they'll think the show is going to have an encore." she whispered.

Joseph only snorted, but obediently followed as she took his hand and dragged him away from the crowd. Before they were out of reach they could hear the young singer intone: "Die Liebe, die Liebe ist eine Himmelsmacht"

She only squeezed her eyes shut at the well-deserved pun. Hopefully, nobody had recognised them, otherwise they would never hear the end of it. Mia would have the time of her life teasing them.

"Clarisse, darling, where are we going?" his voice interrupted her reverie. Turning around she gave him a tender smile, then she turned back and pointed to the gigantic cathedral. "There."

Inside the dome, it was eerily quiet. Not even the masses of tourists could disturb the quietness this house of God commanded. Evening mass was just beginning and Clarisse dragged him into one of the back pews. The priest spoke the first prayer and Joseph saw with some surprise, how his wife joined in earnestly. She had never been one for openly displayed faith. As a matter of fact, he knew that her faith wasn't too deeply rooted. She had not been raised that way and in later years it had only come partially. She believed, he knew. She followed the necessary rules, yes, but to go into a church in a foreign place to participate in a mass – this was unusual.

When the priest began his sermon, he leaned over and asked in a whisper: "Darling, why are we here?"

She smiled at him. "Darling, this is the one church in the world that always makes me want to pray. I don't know why, but every time, I go in here, I just want to pray. It is so beautiful here. And today I felt like I must pray, to thank for being here with you. For having you. And for having your love. There is no better place to do it."

What could he say, she was right. Putting an arm around her shoulder, he kissed her temple and decided to simply enjoy the quiet and peace.

As they exited St. Stephen, the beginning of dusk was settling, tinting the town in the slightly morbid atmosphere it was known for. Checking his watch, Joseph realized that they would have to hurry, if they wanted to make it to the dinner on time.

Leaning against him, Clarisse heaved a sigh as she caught his gesture. "Do we have to go back already?"

He kissed her temple again, tightening his hold on her shoulders. "I'm afraid so. We still have to change and since I told you, you should wear your best dress, I believe we will have to hurry actually to be punctual."

She looked up at him, a teasing glint in her eyes. "Does that mean, I take too long getting ready? And that we are always late because of me?"

Of course, he heard the challenging tone in her voice, but knowing she wasn't serious, he chose to ignore the challenge and rather steer their steps towards their hotel again.

Even though the sun was no longer shining on them, the air was still balmy, though much cooler. The illumination now came from the streetlights rather than the reflection of the sun. Still there were many people meandering through the streets, doing some last minute shopping before the stores would close, or heading towards dinner places or dates.

Vienna's inner city gave the impression of a relaxed, laidback summer spot and Joseph couldn't help but revel in. He knew there were perfect days and he had had some of those over the last months, but if he was honest, the last few hours had been life in its utter perfection…