Chapter 4: Wendy
Wendy looked over the children as they slept in their bunks at the back of the caravan. The four were still away on their journey to Darwin, as was to be expected, and she had volunteered to watch the little ones that evening. She smiled softly to herself as she watched the young faces at ease in rest. It was a welcomed change from their reality, their lost innocence forgotten in the peace of dreams. She remembered when she had Judo, her first-and for quite some time-only. It had been a difficult pregnancy, not as much as Chilli's had been with either of her girls, but due to Judo's size it had been a real task later on. Her daughter had been nearly 6 kilos at birth, which had had been induced early due to her doctor's concern over the possibility delivering Judo if she'd been allowed to come to full term.
But now Judo wasn't her only little one. With Pat and Janelle's passing she now had their boys to care for, Lucky and Chucky. She had known them well enough before all of this had happened, they were neighbors after all, but it was one thing being friendly with someone and another entirely raising them. The boys had just been starting to get over their father's death when Janelle had died in the attack; it had been deeply traumatic to say the least. Neither of them had done much for the first few days afterward, it had been a struggle to get them to eat or even leave the caravan. But with time and with support she'd managed to get them to a point where, while they hadn't moved on, they were at least functioning.
Chucky had taken it the hardest. He was young still, and unlike his older brother, he hadn't been hardened yet by the realization that the old world was truly gone. He'd still had hope and some degree of innocence, and even with his father's death he'd at least still had his mother to cling to. When she passed he truly had nothing of his old life except for his older brother. He'd hugged Lucky and done nothing but cry for nearly three straight days following the funerals. It had been heartrending to hear him sobbing and not know what to do. It hadn't helped that I was on so many pain meds for my lost appendage and was still half out of it I couldn't do much of anything…
Lucky also was grieving, but he had internalized it much more than his brother. Pat had always been a bit old fashioned, and part of that was not expressing much in terms of his emotions. He was still friendly and outgoing, but negative thoughts and feelings weren't discussed, especially around the kids. As a result the older retriever brother had begun to compartmentalize his thoughts and had shut down, refusing to do anything as he couldn't express how he felt and was overwhelmed. He'd just numbly stared forward as his brother clung to him, occasionally rubbing his back in his best attempt to provide comfort.
But with time and patience she'd managed to get them started on healing. She knew they deeply missed their parents, but they'd bonded with Judo and had taken to Wendy as their mother figure. She was usually Miss Wendy, but on occasion the boys had slipped and said 'mum' when talking to her. She didn't mind either way, she knew they weren't hers, not biologically, but she loved them just the same whether she was 'mum' or 'Miss Wendy'. They're good boys, and I promise you-Pat and Janelle, wherever you are-that I'm going to do my damndest to make sure they're okay.
She walked back from the bunks toward the middle of the caravan. Lee, Mary, and Chris were all asleep in a play-pen. There was only room for one cot, which meant that they were sharing. The cousins didn't seem to mind, as the three little Heelers had curled up together. It was honestly one of the few positives that had come from all this, that these little ones had come to be. Lee was holding onto Mary's tail and Chris was grasping onto his sister's arm. The three were sleeping soundly, a small miracle in itself, and Wendy found herself tearing up at the thought that they were never going to get a chance to know the old world.
It was clear that with the three of them and the other children that there was a problem brewing. Judo had entered adolescence, which meant that Bluey was likely close behind. Wendy suspected that Lucky was also beginning his journey into adulthood as the boy's voice had started squeaking on occasion. Furthermore the older Bell brother-Monti-while not yet at the age to start puberty was certainly starting to get curious about the opposite gender. This, coupled with the fact that in a year that the babies would be toddlers and need separate sleeping arrangements, made it clear that there was going to be a shortage on space and a need for some separate living quarters.
After all, the cabin is already pulling double duty as the adult's sleeping quarters and armory. Wendy thought, looking at the small building through the window. The tent that's the medical room is full, and honestly should be upgraded to a permanent structure… And the caravan is also at capacity with kids and supplies. She sat down and pulled out a pad of paper and a pencil, starting to make a list. Like most things in life, it was easier to find a solution when you knew what the problem was. And the best way to determine the problem is to list what is wrong and focus on what can and cannot be changed.
***ST***
It was the next morning when Wendy shared her list with the others in camp. The children were off playing before Chilli would start school, which meant it was a good time for the remaining adults to talk. Even though it was only Nate, Chilli, Stripe, Trixie, and herself it made sense to at least begin to address the issue.
"I called us together because it is apparent that we have a potential issue in the near future and I want to address it before it occurs." Wendy began, flipping over her sheet of paper. "As you know there are currently ten adults and nine children here in our camp. We currently have sufficient sleeping arrangements, but that is on the brink of not being the case. Between the older children reaching adolescence and needing separate quarters from the opposite gender and the infants soon being in need of beds we will run out of space."
"So, it's clear we need to do something." Stripe commented, agreeing that it made sense to start separating the older children, knowing that while nothing would happen intentionally he didn't want to have to have any sort of talk with Muffin sooner than absolutely necessary.
"That is correct. But the question is what do we do?" Wendy replied.
"Should we build another cabin?" Chilli suggested.
"A good idea, but it still leaves us vulnerable. We had time to prepare for the last attack, and even then our defenses still failed in the end. We need something sturdier and more permanent, as well as additional living quarters."
Nate tilted his head a moment in thought before raising his hand, "I have an idea of how we can make the camp more secure with walls and have more buildings."
"What do you suggest?"
"We could make it like a castle, sturdy exterior walls that share with fortified rooms." Nate stated, "I was really into medieval history for a while, this guy named Shad had a YouTube channel Shaddiversary that talked all about them. We could maybe use some of his ideas to build a quasi-castle."
"I like it." Trixie nodded. "Wendy, do you think you could draft up plans for something if Nate has some ideas?"
"Definitely." She replied.
Nate's tail wagged slightly as he smiled, happy to be useful. "Give me a little time to think and maybe I can make a rough drawing and then we can come up with a plan."
A few hours later Nate and Wendy had worked to make a rough plan. They would scavenge as much as they could from Ranken and other small settlements nearby, razing structures and taking the building supplies to camp with the ute and 4x4 when it returned. They'd build a sturdy outer wall of reinforced wood, metal, and brick scavenged from cars and buildings. There'd be a single doorway-wide enough only for foot traffic-they'd decided that no vehicles would be allowed in or out of the camp-their vehicles would be in a separate structure attached to the side of the camp-and that they would have defense points at the corners. There would be nine sections inside in three rows of three. Each would be joined with doorways and be fortifiable, allowing any section to be locked off if needed or breached.
"It's going to be a lot of work, but it's not impossible." Wendy explained to the others that evening after the children had gone to sleep.
"I think we can do it. It'll take a few months, but if our calculations are correct we already have about a third of the materials we need." Nate added, "We'll get the rest from Ranken and a few other small towns around here."
"I think it makes sense. We're pretty open here; if we are planning on this being where we settle we may as well make it somewhere safe." Trixie stated.
"Plus with this plan we get an enclosed rooftop area we can use for defense and growing crops." Nate noted, indicating the area on the plan. "It'll definitely make it easier for us to have our own food than having to worry about always finding food somewhere."
"So, what will all the rooms be?" Chilli asked, looking at the plans in front of the group.
"We aren't entirely sure but we know there'll be an infirmary, school, and at least three living quarters. The other rooms may be storage, food prep, an armory, or something else depending on what we decide we need." Wendy noted. "They'll all be 7 by 7 meters, so they'll be a decent size to use however we need."
"Alright." Stripe turned to Nate, "Whaddya say Nate? Two of us head out in the morning to Ranken and start scavenging whatever we can get in Rad's ute?"
"Sure thing dad." Nate smiled.
Trixie rolled her eyes, "First let's make sure you two get a good night's rest. It's late…" She yawned. "And I need my boys in top shape if they're planning on doing anything."
"Okay Trix." Stripe kissed her snout. "I suppose it is time for bed."
The group dispersed and as Wendy started heading toward the caravan Chilli gently touched her shoulder. Wendy turned around.
"Hey, can I talk to you for a moment?" Chilli asked.
"Of course." Wendy nodded, stepping away from the caravan and sitting on a timber that they'd laid nearby. She motioned for Chilli to sit beside her.
Chilli exhaled, "How do you do it?"
Wendy furrowed her brow slightly, "Do what?"
"How do you manage it all? Even now I look at you and it's incredible… you're taking care of your daughter, helping the Retrievers, managing to draft plans for a new fortress for us to live in… Honestly it's amazing. And you're doing it all single-handedly, pun somewhat intended." Chilli exhaled, "I just feel like I can't manage, that I'm always on the edge of falling apart… that I'm not good enough." She whispered the last part, tucking her head into her lap.
"Chilli…" Wendy placed her hand on her friend's shoulder. "You think I don't have my doubts? I wonder if I'm doing anything right with Lucky and Chucky. Not to mention Judo growing up, she's already starting to get a rebellious streak and I have no idea how I'm going to handle that once it manifests fully." She paused. "You're a good mother." She looked in Chilli's eyes with a smile, "And you are good enough."
Chilli snorted, "Thanks." She looked up, tears on her face, "I just don't know what the hell I'm doing… especially with Bluey and Bandit... and Bingo."
"What do you mean?"
"Ever since Bingo passed I've just thrown myself into everything. I've been teaching the kids, taking care of Lee, making sure that Bandit had everything he needed for any of the outings he and the guys took. I have to keep myself busy, because if I'm not that's when Bingo comes back… then I see her just… lying there."
Wendy sighed, "I don't know what to say. I only lost an arm, not a child."
Chilli looked over at her friend, "It's okay, I shouldn't've said anything…" She started pushing herself up.
"Oh no you don't!" Wendy grabbed her paw. "Sit back down; it's clear you need to talk."
"You sure?"
"Absolutely."
"Thanks." Chilli sniffed. "I just feel like between that and the fact that Bluey isn't Bluey anymore and Bandit isn't Bandit anymore, I just don't know what to do." She sighed. "I just want my family back, but none of us are the same anymore. I don't have my daughter or my husband. I have strangers wearing their faces. Everything changed and I can't keep up with it."
"Grief affects us all differently." Wendy stated, "It'll take time to heal, it's only been a few months."
"Bluey's fine, she plays with the other kids and can handle school. And Bandit manages. He still leads us and does what he needs to. So why am I still so broken? Why does it hurt so fucking much?!"
Wendy frowned, "Have you talked with them about it?"
"No, I don't want them to worry about me. They're doing okay; I don't want to drag them down."
"You won't be dragging them down; you'll be sharing how you feel." Wendy paused, "When Bandit gets back I think the three of you need to talk about Bingo. I know that it'll hurt, but you need to figure out how you're all feeling and what you can do to grieve. Grieving on your own sucks, I think being able to have someone to talk to, someone close to you, might help you feel a bit better."
***Author's Note***
Hello everyone! I ended up splitting up this chapter into this part back at camp and another part returning to our group in Darwin. Don't worry, we'll be back with them next time! If you liked this, check out my other work "Motherhood" or my collab with Kodiwolf321 "Project New Era". I also take commissions, if you're interested. Any and all reviews are appreciated, but not required! Thanks again for reading!