This was going to be a nice happy ending. I changed my mind. Authoress' privilege. I decided I was going to create more angstyness. Mwhahahahaha (etc). You're lucky to have this- I've had my school prom (which was amazing- although I ripped my dress before I got there), a ruby wedding- not my own, and I go to Spain tomorrow. So no updates for a week- I'll leave you all hanging! Sorry for being so evil. This is only short, but I thought I'd leave you something to read!

"What?" I stare at him incredulously. "I don't believe you."

"Why not?"

"Because… you're just trying to stop me from jumping. You'd say anything."

"No!" He shakes his head desperately. "Rem, I really do love you. And if you still want to jump, then I'm not going to stop you. But I'll jump too."

Looking into his eyes, he seems to be serious. The ever-present spark of mischief is gone, and the black holes seem troubled. But no! This is Sirius!

"Even if I did believe you, why do you think I'd want to stay?" Outside it had begun to rain, and the drops were blowing in to land on us. I raised my voice to be heard above the wind. "Sirius, I know you! You fall in and out of love so fast that they've installed revolving doors on your bed! You wouldn't know real love if it bit you on the ass!"

His eyes are blazing. "I wouldn't? Let me tell you what real love is, Moony! Real love is not being able to sleep unless you're in the same room and I can hear you breathing. Real love is failing Astronomy so that I can be tutored by you. Real love is hating the pain you go through, feeling every scream you make. Real love is noticing the little things you do, like pushing your hand through your hair or frowning when you read. Real love is knowing every little detail, including imperfections, and loving you all the more for them!"

"What kind of imperfections?"

"Well, everyone thinks you're just quiet, but really you're antisocial because you're afraid of people finding out who you are and hurting you, and that makes you feel vulnerable. You have an addiction to chocolate, and when you get some and start eating it you look angelic. You're constantly sarcastic, and you tell me off for being me, and you hide yourself away in the library…"

"You forgot my two biggest imperfections. My body is covered in scars, and I turn into a wolf once a month."

"No." He reaches across and takes my hand. "The wolf is part of you. Without it you wouldn't be you, my own cantankerous Moony. And the scars…" He traces one on the back of my hand with his thumb. "They remind me that you're beautiful on the inside as well, because you're so strong that you don't mention them." He releases my hand and hunches away. "Even if you don't jump, I might. You're in love with someone. "

"It's you." My voice is dead, lifeless.

"What?"

"Sirius, it's only ever been you. I've watched you for ages. I've never had any other partner. Every new boyfriend or girlfriend you had drove daggers straight through my heart. If you damn well loved me then why did you do that? And why did you tell me you were in love?"

"I was! With you!"

"You never told me that! The next day you were snogging Stromboli. Do you know how that feels?"

He's blinking. "I guess I didn't think."

"Sirius, you never think!" I turn away, shaking as tears run down my face.

"I'm sorry, Rem." He sounds genuine, so heartbroken I have to look at him. The rain has plastered his hair to his skull, except for wisps which have escaped to curl crazily. His shirt is sticking to his torso, going see-through. I can see his muscles, the six pack that makes everyone with a pulse skip a breath, even the straight guys and lesbians. His makeup has run, giving him huge black circles around his eyes. It can't just be from the rain. He must have been crying. As I watch he begins to sob, leaning away from me. "I'm so sorry. Rem, you deserve someone better than me. Someone who thinks about you, and doesn't argue, and doesn't flirt, and is serious…"

I reach towards him. "That's not what I want. I want someone who cares enough about me to spend years researching a spell to make my life more bearable. I want someone who gets lost dancing to my song, and who wears makeup even though he's male, and who laughs at everything, and who pretends to be strong but is really vulnerable."

He shakes his head, looking at me. "I'm not good enough for you, and you need to get on with your life." He takes my hand and raises it to his lips, kissing it. His lips are cold, icy, and his breath ghosts across my hand as he speaks. "Bye Rem."

He pushes himself forward, into empty space. I grab for him quickly. I won't lose him, not now. Gritting my teeth, I hold on as his weight pulls me across the wet stones. "Rem, let go!"

"No!" I look down into his terrified eyes. "You really think you can love me and leave me to die without you? I love you!" I can feel myself slipping. The rain is blowing into my eyes, making it hard to see.

Then I fall.

Somehow I'm holding Sirius. We twist and turn, buffeted by the winds. I pull him so that he's falling on top of me, and so that I'll land first. My werewolf skeleton may survive better than his. He's clinging to me, his eyes clenched shut.

Pain.

Blackness.

carpe-nox-sulum-nox- Ta. And I love long random reviews. I was going to watch Cambridge Spies, but I never got round to it. Must do that at some point. Yeah, dunno if marriages between people and fics are legal… but hey! And the English weather was awful the other day, waking me up at 5 with thunder. They had the same stuff at Glastonbury :snigger:. And you didn't threaten me! I love you!

SilverTrinity- Ha! Even bigger cliffie now!

I-Shave-Clowns- That is how you spell spectacular. I think.

kaotickween- Ta! Especially for the 'wow's

Versipellis- Yeah, I know, my parents tell me so all the time.

KawaiiMegami86- Ah, but he can still fall… I'm evil.

Silverwitch07- Sirius is a dude, so he had to tell Rem. Coz he's going crazy.

deathfire1334- Another short sweet review. Now would not be the best time to tell everyone I'll be away for two weeks after Spain…

EsScaper- Enough soulpouringoutness? Who cares if that ain't a word.

lauren- Ta lovie, but still sad? I'm such an angst whore, and I don't like reading it coz I want the characters to be happy, but I still read it and still write it.

winterbaby93- Maybe you're his soulmate in this reality (but everyone knows it's me ;)

siriusly delusional- I'm getting good at evil endings

madscotswoman Just for you, Stromboli will be making a reappearance in the story. Bad guy!

Minority- Ta darling, and here is the rest.

butterflywings32- Darling, I don't mind. And I love your story! So plug away!

Lykaios Nyx- I have to be vague. Leave something to your imagination!

SLC- Buy your inflatable silver hammer at SCTMCL now! (scarecrow, tin man, cowardly lion- I'm sad) Ask for Maxwell!

checkmarks- I always do cliffies!

Tanya J Potter- Haha, even less nice cliffy!

Robyn1212- I was quite affected by the last chapter. And, yeah, but I like my middle name better. What, I don't own them?

the Hermione Jane Weasley G- Ah, but everyone would have got annoyed. That could have been funny.

IssaLee- Ah, well. Remus thinks too much, methinks.

Lady of Faerie- I am pretty obvious, yeah.