Disclaimer: I do not own Magic: The Gathering, only my own characters.

CHAPTER 36-Mana Burn

Arrathir ran headlong into the forest, not caring where he was going, only obsessed with putting as much distance between Eva and himself.

His entire body was in pain, partially from his beating and partially from the duel. The physical pain he could deal with. His healing factor was already kicking in and most of his small wounds were gone. It was the psychological pain that was killing him. The memory of his attempted rape on Eva was on continuous playback in his mind. He could still fell the lust coursing through him as his demonic side sought to satisfy its urges. He saw Eva's tearstained face and shuddered in disgust and he remembered how much it had aroused him.

If Khell hadn't shown up, I would have…done the unthinkable.

But you would have enjoyed it. I know your feelings for the girl. You desire her.

You bastard! Do you know what I just did? I betrayed Eva! I shattered the trust she had in me! She'll never see me the same way again! Whenever she'll look at me, the only thing she will see is you! Physical wounds can heal, but mental ones never do!

Cry me a fucking river and build a bridge and get over it, you pathetic, weak little halfling bastard!

Stop it.

You're worthless, you know why? Because you're afraid, afraid of who you are and the power you wield.

Stop it!

You always need someone to save your ass. When it's not your spirit, it's Charles, or Khell, or Eva. You couldn't even save you from yourself!

"STOP IT!" Arrathir screamed as he came to a halt. Breathing heavily, he waited for the demon's response, but none came. Arrathir sat down and realized he was crying. He gave in, venting his emotions as sobs racked his body.

He's right. I'm worthless. I told Eva I'd protect her, but I couldn't even protect her from myself.

He looked down at his bloodstained claws. The memory of him killing the elves flashed across his mind. Yes, he'd enjoyed that was well. It had been a game.

I'm nothing but a killing machine, a monster who doesn't deserve to live.

Arrathir looked at his claws again. It would be so simple: a slash across each wrist and the nightmare would be over. He could escape the pain and the sadness. Even his demon powers couldn't save him. The demon would die along with him.

Arrathir shook his head. Was he actually considering suicide?

No! That's not the way out! OK, so I fucked up big time. I should…Christ; I have no idea what I should do.

Arrathir!

Chikuro?

Arrathir was flooded with relief as he heard the Keeper's voice in his mind.

What the Hell happened?

The demon…he took over and tried to rape Eva. Chikuro, I-I don't know what I'm going to do.

Hang on! I'm coming out!

The spirit appeared beside Arrathir and placed a reassuring arm around the distraught man.

"It's OK, Arrathir," he said "You're going to get through this."

"Oh yeah?" said Arrathir, turning on him "What about you promising to prevent the demon from taking over? What happened to that?"

"Arrathir, the herbs severed our mind link," explained Chikuro "That's why I wasn't able to take over when the elves started to beat you. It is also why the demon was able to take over your body more easily."

"I'm worthless," said Arrathir "I hurt Eva today, very badly."

"Arrathir!" snapped Chikuro "It was not your fault. You have very little experience in dealing with your demonic side."

"How can I face Eva again after what I did?" moaned Arrathir "I bet she hates me now."

"She knows it wasn't you," said Chikuro "You would never do anything to hurt her. What is important is you apologize profusely to her. An apology can work wonders."

Arrathir sighed. "Well, it's the least I can do," he agreed.

"We have to go after him!" said Charles "He's completely out of it! He could do something really stupid if we don't find him fast!"

"No," said Khell "I've known Arrathir longer than you have. He needs to be alone so he can sort this out. If we went after him, he would feel we are prying and that might worsen his condition. He will come back when he is ready."

"He can't even summon!" roared Charles "You expect him to survive in Yavimaya without any protection?"

"I'm sure Chikuro will protect him," said Khell.

"Well, where was Chikuro when the demon tried to rape Eva?" yelled Charles "Where was Chikuro when the elves were beating the shit out of him?"

"Charles, calm down," said Khell "From what Eva told us, Arrathir was drugged and this might have prevented Chikuro from taking over his body."

"Come on!" said Charles "Is there nobody here who agrees with me?" He looked expectantly around, but nobody answered.

"I don't see what all the fuss is about," said Erik "Just let Quinn cry for a while and he'll be back to pester us some more."

Charles growled. "One of these days, Morlock, I'm really gonna kick your ass."

"You can't even beat me in a duel!" laughed Erik "Much less in a real fight!"

"Eva?" asked Charles "I know you've been through a very traumatic experience, but do you want to help me find Arrathir?"

"Sorry, Charles," she said "But my emotions are too messed up right now for me to think straight."

"Fine!" said Charles "Since you're all abandoning Arrathir, I'm going to go look for him!" He turned and walked off into the forest.

;Are you sure of what you're doing, Cannon?;

;Look! Arrathir is my friend, and if I were in his shoes right now, I'd want a friend by my side!;

Reaching out with his mind, Charles searched for the Keeper. It was difficult because he suspected Arrathir must have run far into the forest. Finally, he managed to detect some black mana ahead of him. It was faint, but he figured it was his best bet. At least it wasn't moving, which meant Arrathir had stopped running. Charles set out to find his friend.

"Chikuro?"

"Hmm?"

"I've been thinking: is it really worth it? All the pain I've caused because of the Awakening? I'm having second thoughts on it. You know how they say when you're fighting evil you have to be careful not to become evil? Well, I think that's what's happening to me."

"Well," sighed Chikuro "You can't make an omelette without breaking some eggs."

"I'm just not sure," said Arrathir "I-I want out."

"What?"

"I just want to go back to living a normal life. No mana, no duels, no summoning, and no Keepers. I'm sick of this."

"Now you're starting to sound like Erik."

"I'm sick of him as well," said Arrathir.

"Surely you must be joking!" said Chikuro "Arrathir, we are so close to completing the Awakening! We only have one more Keeper to go!"

"I'm not joking," said Arrathir "I mean, look at what's happened so far: we've killed two Planeswalkers, I slaughtered several elves, and almost raped Eva!"

Arrathir suddenly stiffened. "Someone is coming," he said. Chikuro took his cue to vanish back into his Soul Room. Arrathir ducked behind a large tree.

It's Charles! How did he find us so fast?

Chiburuu was the best of us at mana tracking. Why are you hiding?

Look, I don't want to see him right now, OK?

"Arrathir!" called Charles "I know you're around here! Come out!"

"Why?" shouted Arrathir "So you can rub it in some more?"

"No," said Charles "I can't possibly imagine how you're feeling right now, but I do know you could use a friend."

"Hi," said Arrathir, coming out into the open "How's Eva?"

"Pretty rattled, as you can imagine."

"Yeah," said Arrathir "Charles, do you think it's all worth it?"

"What is?"

"The Awakening. Does it really matter if we awaken the Keepers or not? I mean, the Multiverse has been going on for millions of years after they were gone, so why do we need to do this?"

"What are you talking about?"

"I'm having second thoughts about the Awakening," said Arrathir "And I've decided I'm out. I quit."

"What?"

"I'm fed up. It's too much for me."

"Arrathir, we were chosen for this," said Charles "You can't quit something like this."

"Going home and never summoning again? I call that quitting."

"Don't tell me you're pulling an Erik," said Charles.

"So what if I am?" shouted Arrathir "You haven't gone through what I have! It's just a game to you, right? You haven't seen the people you love get killed because of you! You haven't had to deal with any demonic changes! You think I want these?" He pointed at his ears. "And this! You think I like walking around with a fucking tail? I mean, look at me! I'm a freak!"

"You may be," said Charles "But what I know you aren't is a coward. The Arrathir I know faces his problems head-on and doesn't run away to sulk. I know you're afraid to face Eva, but staying away from her won't help. You have to confront your fears to overcome them."

He's right…I've made a terrible mistake and now I have to bite the bullet and face the music.

"Fine," said Arrathir "I'll come back and apologize to Eva."

"Good," said Charles "I know this is hard for you, but once it is over, you'll feel a lot better."

"Charles, thanks for coming after me," said Arrathir "I don't know what I would have done."

The Keeper merely smiled as they began walking back towards the others.

"Khell?" asked Eva "Why did the demon bite me? Is its some kind of ritual?"

Khell leaned over and examined the wound on Eva's neck. He nodded. "Demons traditionally mark their mates. It shows to other males that she is taken and binds her to him. While she is marked, no other man may touch her. However, this is usually done consensually. In your case, he did it only to humiliate you."

"So I'm bound to that thing?" Eva asked.

"Unfortunately, yes," said Khell "Only the demon who made the mark can remove it."

Eva shuddered. "I never want to see him again," she said.

"I understand," said Khell "You have suffered terrible trauma and have no wish to relive it. However, if you do not confront the demon, you will remain afraid of him, and this fear will only grow until you are unable to bear the presence of Arrathir."

"The sooner the better?"

"Yes. I know it's asking a lot, but you'll be better off once you get it over with. Speaking of which, here they come."

Effectively, Arrathir and Charles were coming out of the forest. Eva froze as she saw Arrathir's eyes go red and hungrily devour her body. She saw him lick his lips in anticipation and mouth the word, "Mine."

(Get a grip! It's not real! It's in your head!)

Arrathir saw the look of fear on Eva's face and hated himself for putting her through this. Taking a deep breath, he walked over to Eva.

"Eva," he said "Can I talk to you, alone?"

"Arrathir, I don't think that is such a good idea," said Khell.

"No," said Eva firmly "I will."

Khell nodded gravely and walked away with Charles to where Halo and Erik were trying to start a fire.

"Eva," Arrathir started "I'm not worthy of your forgiveness, and I'm not asking for it. All I want you to know is how extremely sorry I am. I wouldn't blame you if you hate me and never wanted to see me again. In fact, if you tell me to, I'll leave and never come back."

"I don't hate you," said Eva, eyes tearing up "But I just don't know if I can forgive what you did to me. I know it wasn't you, but I still don't know. I want to forgive you, but my emotions are too screwed up right now for me to know. I'm sorry."

She doesn't hate me…

"Eva, look," said Arrathir "I know I betrayed you. I told you I would always be there for you, and I broke that promise. I'm as scared as you are about this whole demon thing." He started to pace animatedly about. "I mean, what am I supposed to do? Walk around knowing I'm a ticking time bomb and that any second I could go demon and kill all my friends?"

Arrathir plopped himself down on a fallen trunk and held his head in his hands. "I can't do this!" he said, now hysterical "I can't bear the responsibility that I might go nuts and start killing people! It's too much!"

"Hey, relax," said Eva, sitting next to him.

"Relax?" said Arrathir "Eva, next time I go demon, I could end up killing you! It is driving me insane!" Arrathir brought his fist smashing down on the trunk, punching a hole in the wood. He was hyperventilating now, a tense expression on his face.

Eva looked at Arrathir. She could see he was completely freaked out about this whole thing. Plucking up her courage, she leaned over and kissed him on the cheek.

Arrathir immediately went from agitated to bewildered. As his brain kicked in and he realized what was going on, he felt an intense burning sensation where Eva's lips were pressing onto his cheek. It was as if a red-hot iron had been put against his skin and was burning its way through his flesh. He realized Eva was channelling raw mana through her lips. He gritted his teeth against the pain and remained immobile.

"Better?" asked Eva, pulling away.

"Yeah," said Arrathir.

"Oh my God!" said Eva, seeing the burn mark on Arrathir's cheek. "I did that?"

"It's OK," said Arrathir "I think because of the trauma, your body started channelling mana as a self-defence mechanism."

"I'm so sorry!" said Eva "I didn't mean to!"

"I'm fine," said Arrathir "Do you want me to leave you alone?"

"Yes, please," said Eva. As Arrathir got up and left, she reflected on what had just happened.

(He could have pulled away, but he didn't. I was the one hurting him all along. All the pain he's been in, it was because he was so sorry for what he did, even though it wasn't him. He was willing to go through all that pain, just for forgiveness.)

She looked at Arrathir and a small smile appeared on her face.

(Arrathir…I think I can forgive you.)

To be continued…

Author's note: What? An early update? Yep. My family is going up north to a cottage and we're leaving on Tuesday, so I figured I'd put in a little overtime to get you a chapter this week.

Megaprops go to Lu Chao who pretty much came up with the entire plot for this chapter.

Also, I've started a forum RPG based on the Awakening. It takes place in an alternate timeline where all the Keepers have awakened and started the Academy of Magic to train summoners from all over the Multiverse (kind of like Jedi Academy). If you're looking for a fun, MTG-related game, join the Academy, damnnit! Check out my profile for the link. We need more students!

Until next week, 011100110110010101100101001000000111100101100001 00100001

CTL: Well, I do my best to keep the story going slow, but it is hard at times because I have a lot of the future chapters written out and I want to get them uploaded. Oh, and I totally agree with the DBZ thing. Kids these days are too protected.

Armongo: I didn't say I wouldn't be putting any SoK cards in the story.

OP: Yes, Halo knows all about Chiguriin.

SSA: You weren't here for the "One-Update-A-Day" challenge. It was nuts. Crudos Custos Reverto is Latin for "Green Keeper Returns," (roughly).

BB: When the demon activated Reanimate, that's when his life dropped. Reanimate makes you loose life equal to the converted mana cost of the creature you bring back.

John: Well, I think I was kidding about the whole "Charles as Miroku" thing.

Megamickel: Actually, if you rearrange the letters of all the words in chapters 12, 27, and 31, you get a hentai fic.

YM: Isn't it creepy how something I created in my free time and, quite literally, pulled out of my ass saved your life? If I ever do write 'the' scene, I'll let you know, kay?

Khell: Well, everything will be explained in Khell's Story. Plus, what better creature to represent green than a wurm? Don't say elf.

Tech: Fall Out who? Man, you kids these days and your bands. I remember when AC/DC and Iron Maiden were the hottest bands around. (Rambles on about the good old days)

ACS: It will all be explained in Khell's Story. I'll pull something off that makes remotely sense.