A/N: Thanks for all your reviews! I LOVE reviews, in case you haven't noticed, and it helps me write better, I suppose, so... review this chapter for me please:) Not to sound annoying or anything. You don't have to if you really don't want to...

Chapter 3

We were staring at each other.

There were certain things running through my mind that I found I couldn't say. I was frustrated, but I couldn't grumble. I was surprised, but I couldn't say hello. I was... somewhat relieved, but I was unable to tell her things I had dreamt about saying. And somewhere, in the back of my mind, I didn't want to.

She stood rigid for the longest time, probably thinking that if she moved, she would ruin something. Her eyes, which seemed a little duller, slowly began to fill with something inexplicable. My breathing suddenly skipped and I had to cough. Although I moved my arm and my head, she stayed still. I coughed and wiped the wetness from my eyes, then tried to say something. My mouth failed to open.

Slowly, as if we were trapped in a different world, she reached up and took the glasses away from my face. I blinked several times before the world returned to normal speed. I realized that I was holding her hand, and I forced myself to let it go. I didn't like the empty feeling it left.

"Hey," she said.

"... Hey..." I replied.

It was odd how neither of our voices trembled, and we just treated each other like... like friends. My eyes fell to my glasses in her hand. I decided not to ask for them, because I saw the scratches on the palms of her hands. I scowled at myself.

"Are you alright?" I asked.

Confused, she looked at her hands. Although part of her hands were red with blood, her lips curled into a small, soft smile. My heart skipped a beat, and something inside me rustled awake. I quickly reached into my pocket and pulled out a handkercheif. I offered it to her, but she simply laughed. It was just a small laugh... but I had missed it. Hearing it again was kind of like the sun coming out after a long thunderstorm. It made one feel... what was that emotion again?

"You always were so polite," she said, taking it with a toss of her hair. She playfully stuck her tongue out at me. "Thanks."

Oh, right. Happy.

Noticing that she still had my glasses, her face flushed a deep red.

Cute, I thought to myself.

She quickly shoved the glasses back in my hands and looked away. As she dabbed at her hands, I watched her. Her skin was still flawless as ever, but there was something about the bags under her eyes that caught my attention. She looked older too, as her hair fell over her cheek. It was different to see her in casual clothes as well. Normally, I would see her in the school's uniform, but I liked how she looked when she wasn't trying to impress anyone. She glanced at me, but distracted herself with cleaning her hands.

My mouth opened and closed, trying to start a conversation. "H... Ah... How have you been?"

She went rigid for only a few seconds before she finished her hand work and looked at me. She took a breath and shrugged. "Not horrible, I guess."

I probably hadn't been good at concealing my emotions because she looked worried at my pained face.

"Don't worry," she said quickly. "I've just been tired lately. You know... school stuff."

I nodded. "I understand."

She scowled and opened her mouth to say something. She decided against it, however, but looked me up and down. She saw my groceries, noticed my attire (sweat pants and a t-shirt), and, finally, her eyes rested on my hair. I sighed inwardly, expecting what was to come. Of all people, she would be the one to comment on my hair after so long.

Yet Risa never failed to amaze me.

"Doing anything today?" she asked, looking hopeful.

School work, making sure Krad didn't tempt me to commit suicide, trying not to get frustrated with the police for being such dumb asses, eating a few meals alone, and going to bed early only to get up early and do the same thing the next day.

I took a deep breath. "No. Not really. Why ask?"

"Want to get a cup of coffee with me?" she suggested. "I was planning on going alone, but..." A small smile appeared again. "I would like it if you joined me."

I didn't accept the offer. I couldn't. I just... I just couldn't.

I ran. Dropped my groceries and ran. I felt something pushing from the back of my mind, and instantly I knew what was going on. My one eye had perfect vision without my glasses on, and the other was still fuzzy. I had seen that sign many times before, when I was in the house alone, and it had almost disappeared. Almost. Krad was still inside of me, just as he always would be. And he was trying to get out. Leave it to him to try and hurt the one damned thing that actually matters in my life.

I knew she hated me. I know that she probably still does. It's a common-known fact by half of the world by now. Me running away after such a polite invitation only made me more of a... well, pathetic bastard is the term I normally use. She probably wouldn't approve of that name. Knowing Risa, she'd frown and begin listing off all the things that were 'good' about me, my personality, my life...

God. Why is it that every time I'm with her (or was with her), every little thing wrong in my life was... right?

I laughed dryling and shook my head at myself. My doors were locked, and I stood in front of the bathroom mirror. Sure enough, one eye was blue, and the other was a light golden color. A frown appeared on my own face.

Aw, what's the matter, Satoshi boy? I think it's a handsome look. Now if we can make the other one gold...

"Shut up," I hissed, wanting more than anything to punch him. Or better yet, we could have gone all out and done a gang rumble. With knives and belts and brass knuckles.

There was a low laugh. But Satoshi, she was smiling at you...

"Shut. Up." I put more emphasis in my words, but it did nothing. I squeezed my eyes shut, trying to make him go away. No good.

You should have known I'd be back, he said, becoming serious. She will never leave your mind, and because of that, there will always be an opening.

"Shut up!" I bellowed, suddenly cracking. I hadn't lost my temper at Krad in a long time, and this was somewhat new to me. My hands were balled into fists and my breathing had become more labored. "Shut up, shut up, shut up!"

Keep yelling, boy, Krad threatened, as if he was amused. I enjoy that kind of rage.

I don't know how exactly I did it, or why exactly I did it, but the next thing I remember was a searing pain in my hand. I was swearing and yelling and shouting random curses at the deamon inside. There was blood on the wall, and blood covering my hand. I was caught so off guard when I saw that I had punched out the mirror that the only thing I could do was stand there. I was bleeding, probably with a bad injury, I was panting, I was livid, and I was standing there. I was so...

Helpless.

That's what I was. Helpless. 24-7, that seemed to be the only thing I managed to be. Totally, utterly, and completely helpless.

And I wondered, as I stood in the middle of my bathroom, if I would ever change.

A/N: Well, what did you guys think?