I'm glad everyone's excited for this new story. I know I am. So, anyway, today we're going to see everyone get ready for the trip, and stuff is going to happen. How am I going to ruin their perfect vacation? Well, read the title of this chapter and you'll start to get the idea.
Just a quick word of warning, this story is going to be much longer than the first one, so I hope you're strapped in for the long haul. I know I am!
"But You don't know me!"
Chapter Two – Five somehow becomes Ten and this isn't going to go well
The week building up to the trip was a strange one. Randy told Stan how Kyle's father, Gerald, would also be going and split the costs of renting the fanciest RV they could find. Stan didn't find any problem with that, especially since it meant that their summer wouldn't be ruined by a sucky RV. Gerald said he didn't mind coming along, since his wife and Ike were doing something together for the summer that was totally epic and legit and not because the author didn't feel like writing them into the story.
When Stan told Wendy about their plans, he was surprised to see that she didn't seem overly excited about the whole thing.
"So, I'm not going to see you all summer?" Wendy asked in a sad tone. Stan blinked at the revelation.
"Um, yeah, I guess," he mumbled. If they hadn't been talking on the phone, he was sure that she would have grabbed him by the arms and not let go.
"What am I supposed to do without you for three whole months?" she whined. "What if you meet a girl?" Stan paused for a moment to think about it.
"Well, what if you went with us?" he asked her. There was a pause on the other end, and for a moment, he thought that she had hung up on him for some reason.
"Are you serious?" she asked.
"Of course!" Stan replied. "I would love to have you along. I don't think I could stand being away from you for that long either. The guys won't mind, and I'm sure the RV will be big enough to fit all of us."
"Well, I could at least ask my parents if it's okay," she said.
After hanging up, Stan went to tell his dad about the slight change.
"Oh, that's ok," Randy told him. "I'm sure we'll have no problem finding an RV big enough to hold all seven of us."
The next day, after Wendy had confirmed with him that her parents gave her permission to go, Stan received another call, this time from Kyle. He sounded rather hesitant.
"Hey dude," Stan greeted. "What's up?"
"So, you remember how when Kenny died, we replaced him with Tweek?" Kyle said. "Well, he told me that his parents are going on some fancy cruise without him. And I felt so bad for him that I kind of invited him to come with us."
"That's no big deal," Stan replied. "I'm sure eight of us will fit."
Kyle hesitated. "He asked if he could invite Craig along," he said after a moment. Stan couldn't help but groan.
"You let him invite Craig?" he sighed.
"I had to!" Kyle said. "They've been dating for so long now, and Tweek was saying how he couldn't stand being apart from him for an entire summer and what do you mean eight of us?" Stan paused, now being the one to hesitate.
"Um, I also may have invited Wendy along myself," he mumbled into the phone.
"You invited a girl?" Kyle asked, his voice sounding slightly annoyed.
"She's my girlfriend!" Stan defended himself. "And we are exactly like Tweek and Craig. We couldn't be apart for a whole summer." Kyle sighed.
"Fine," he said at last. "As long as no one else comes along. It sounds like it's going to be a tight fit already and we don't even know how many beds there will be in this thing."
"Ok, seriously?" Kyle sighed. "Who the hell invited Butters?"
None of the others replied as they stood in Stan's driveway, waiting for his dad to pull up with the RV he had rented. Butters had just arrived with all of his stuff, waving happily and thanking them for inviting him along for the trip.
Maybe it was because everyone else had grown at least an inch or two over four years, but it almost seemed like Butters had shrunk somehow. He had changed very little, except for letting his hair grow out slightly longer.
The only thing different about Kenny and Stan was that they were taller, although Stan's hair had started to poke through his hat. Craig and Tweek also looked pretty much the same, except Craig had dyed a streak of his hair blonde, while Tweek had dyed a lock of his hair black. It was actually quite adorable, the way they matched.
Wendy, on the other hand, had started experimenting with different hairstyles and did her hair differently pretty much every other day. Kyle had somehow managed to get his hair to start growing down instead of up, and even though he still hid most of it under his hat, they could still see waves of red hair falling over his face. Cartman had grown taller than all of them and had somehow started to lose weight (for reasons he wouldn't disclose) and he hardly looked like the ball of dough he used to be. All of them still wore the same hats they wore when they were ten.
"Hey, fellas!" Butters greeted, coming over to them. "Thanks for inviting me to come along with you guys on this trip! My parents weren't planning anything nearly this fun for us, and it will be nice not to have to worry about getting grounded all the time, too. So, when are we leaving?"
Stan and the others tried to force a smile on their faces as Stan addressed him. "Just as soon as my dad gets here," he replied through his teeth. Craig leaned over to him, not even sort of attempting to smile.
"You invited Butters?" he asked him in a low voice. Stan glared sideways at him.
"No," he said through gritted teeth. "I invited Wendy." Craig blinked at him.
"You can't invite two people?" he wondered.
"I really hope this RV is big enough for all of us," Wendy said, before Stan could make an angry retort. They were saved from having to make any other awkward comments when they saw an RV turn up the street and make its way over to them.
The RV seemed pretty big on the outside, and not shitty looking, which was promising, and Stan only hoped it was as big and not shitty on the inside as it was on the outside. They all quickly moved out of the way as the RV slowly backed into the driveway and Gerald and Randy hopped out.
"So, boys…and girl," Randy said, spreading his arms wide towards the vehicle. "What do ya think? Not half bad, huh?"
"And that's really going to fit all of us?" Stan wondered in surprise.
"Yup," Gerald replied. "The dealer guaranteed it. They even had twenty workers go and fit inside it just to prove it."
"Well, at least some business man was honest for once," Kyle muttered under his breath to Stan, who nodded in return.
"Now there's just one small problem," Randy said suddenly. "There are…ten of us and only five beds in this thing, so we're all gonna have to buddy up and share beds." Immediately, Stan raised his hand in a panic.
"I change my mind," he said quickly. "I don't want to go on this trip after all. I just want to stay here instead." Randy pointed cheerily to him.
"Too bad!" he replied. "Now everyone, hop in."
The teens grumbled as they all picked up their stuff and started filing into the RV. The thing wasn't the fanciest RV in the world, but it had a cozy feel to it. Two small beds that were just big enough so that two people could sleep on it and not feel awkward sat in the back corners, and another bed was tucked in a recess above the table and booth, which Randy said could be folded out into another bed. There was a small couch on the wall across from the booth, and near the front was a small kitchen and sink, complete with a mini fridge and mini pantry. The bathroom sat in the very back, and next to it was a small shower room. A small flat screen TV was mounted on the wall.
"Cool," Craig commented, sounding very unimpressed. "Dibs on the top bed. Tweek, you're with me." Then he casually tossed his things onto the bed he had picked while Tweek mumbled something about not liking heights and being afraid that he would fall off during the night.
"Oh, we can take this one, Stan," Wendy said happily, going over to one of the corner beds. Stan gulped nervously.
"We?" he repeated softly. For some reason, the thought of sharing a bed with his girlfriend made him incredibly nervous, like it had never occurred to him that she would want to share a bed with him.
"So, where are we headed to first on this great journey of ours?" Butters asked excitedly.
"Hey, yeah, where are we going first?" Kyle asked, turning to his dad.
"The Grand Canyon, of course!" Gerald said as if it should have been obvious. "Now everybody, sit down and make sure to hang on tight, because we are headed out!"
Randy, sitting in the driver's seat, turned the RV on and it roared to life before pulling out onto the streets. The others all took seats either on the couch or at the booth, and only Butters started unpacking. There were little cubby holes everywhere in the wall to jam stuff into, and drawers under the two beds, but that was about it for storage.
"This is going to be so much fun!" Butters said happily as he unpacked his things. "I wonder what sort of things we're going to see and do! The places we'll go, the memories we'll make! This is going to be a blast!" He spoke rather quickly, and they were all taken by surprised when he suddenly turned to the others. "So," he continued. "Which one of you fellas is going to bunk with me?"
Immediately, Kenny, Kyle and Cartman's eyes all widened as it suddenly dawned on them that one of them was going to have to share a bed with Butters. And each other. The moment they realized this, Kenny slammed his face into the table in despair. When none of them answered, Butters simply shrugged and went back to unpacking.
"I'm not sharing a bed with Butters," Cartman said matter-of-factly.
"Well, neither am I," Kyle replied.
"Oh, and I am? No way," Kenny hissed, raising his head to glare at his two friends.
"Well, one of you guys has to share a bed with him," Wendy pointed out, looking way too entertained by all of this.
The three of them argued about it for most of the day, with Butters not even sort of caring about the fact that no one wanted to share a bunk with him. Then they decided that they would settle it with a game of rock-paper-scissors, which quickly became fifty games because for some reason all three of them would not stop picking rock. Wendy watched them with ever growing excitement, Tweek looked absolutely terrified, Stan was growing more annoyed, and Craig remained completely indifferent to the entire thing.
"Ok, seriously?" Stan snapped at last. "Will one of you just lose already so we can do something else?"
"It's not that simple, Stan," Kenny replied, rolling his eyes. "You can't just change your hand like that, otherwise you might- God damn it!" He had looked over at the other two as he had decided to switch to paper so he could win, only to discover that both Kyle and Cartman had switched to scissors, effectively making him the loser.
"Yay!" Butters cheered, running over to Kenny and giving him a huge bear hug. "We're going to be bunk mates!"
As Kenny tried in vain to free himself from the crushing hug, Wendy stared at them and after a moment, she grinned.
"I ship it," she muttered, nodding her head.
And that's where this chapter is going to end. It will take a while to get the next chapter out, since I'm still typing it, but hopefully I'll have it finished before spring break is over. And then I'll be typing a little less as I try to focus more on my school work. I won't stop entirely, of course, I just probably won't be able to post as much.
But, in the meantime, remember there are three things that tell the truth: drunks, small children, and yoga pants.