DISCLAIMER: I don't own fma or any of the characters.

The Pain of Feeling Alive

Every moment spend away from him, every kiss not kissed, every second of the unknown it tears at me until I am nothing. Nothing more than pain itself.

You say that pain reminds you that you are alive. To me, the pain of being alive, without you holding me tightly, without you kissing me, without you in my life, is killing me from the inside out.

I stare into space as I sit at my desk. This pain of feeling alive you speak of is nothing to me. I have never known the agony of which you speak. I do not understand why you say this.

I wish to understand what you mean. Is it that the screaming heartache tells me that I love you? Is it that the misery swallowing me so slowly, inching over my body, proclaims that I need you? That I can't live without you?

Tell me love, is this what you mean by the pain of feeling alive?

rizahawkeye21

A/N: sorry this sounds so depressing… I just feel like this right now… I won't say to who this is for cause I highly doubt he knows. Anywho…

Maria Symeou: to sum up the episode, Izumi teacher had a kid but the baby died soon after its birth. She was so depressed that she tried to resurrect the child. She failed miserably and for her mistake her lower organs such as her womb and intestines were removed for equivalent exchange. That's why she coughs up blood. Since both Ed and her saw 'the gate' they can transmute without a transmutation circle. The boy that Izumi is taking care of has Ed's missing limbs. When the military Archer (EVIL I TELL YOU!) and Armstrong take the boy away to Southern HQ Izumi tries to rescue the boy even though it's possible that he is a homunculi. The chimera that Ed and Al encounter is part of Greed's group. Do you get it now? Anything I left out? I hope you and your friend understand better, but then again I'm not very good at explaining things…

Bureiku: I'm sorry about the whole romance thing. I'm just a romantic at heart so again I'm sorry.

Fluff Freak, Guest, LT. Hawkeye: Thank you soooooo much! You don't know what that means so me. I'm really glad I have readers who love my writing: )

Edited: 3/12/06