Oops! I just added this chapter as a new story! Oh well, I fixed it. This Song belongs to HIM its called Fortress of Tears. Degrassi belongs to whoever degrassi belongs to. NOT ME. Hope you enjoy. Ellie and Sean forever!

Chapter 3

Fortress of Tears

The next day I walked into school not knowing what to expect. Would Sean deny what he had said to me the night before? Was he wrong? Was he lying?

I didn't want to think so negatively, but I couldn't help it. Every time something good happened to me, something bad had to follow it.

I went to English class and remembered that I'd never gotten my homework done. Oh well, I thought to myself, guess that means I get another zero. I sat down in my normal seat and pretended to pay attention.

At lunch, I chose not to eat, so I went and sat at a table by myself. I had nothing to do, so I'm sure I looked like an idiot, sitting at the table, alone and quiet and solitary. I liked being alone, though; nobody can hurt you if nobody is around. Sometimes it sucked.

"Contemplating the mysteries of the universe?" A voice asked from behind me.

I turned, knowing that I would see Sean. "Maybe."

"Can I join you?"

"If you want."

"You're not much of a talker, are you?" he sat in the chair next to mine.

"I'm just not used to talking to people anymore."

"How are things going?" he asked. "Did your mom catch you last night?"

"Are you kidding? The world could have ended and she would have still been asleep."

"Yeah, I know what you mean."

I nodded. I had no clue what to say.

"Will you come over tonight?"

"I don't know that I can," I told him.

"Will you try?"

"Yeah."

"Can I walk you home?"

"Won't Jay need you to steal something after school?"

"Jay can do it himself."

"Okay."

"I'll meet you after our last class."

I decided to go to Sean's after school, instead of going straight home. He wanted to know me, despite my defense mechanism that kept everybody away. That meant a lot.

"Which direction is your house in?" he asked as we met on the steps outside of Degrassi.

"Could we go to yours instead?"

"Yeah, sure."

"Cool. Thanks."

"No problem."

There was an awkward silence as we walked.

"Do you like music?" he asked.

"Some music."

"What kinds of stuff do you listen to?"

"I don't know, really. Whatever comes on the radio, I guess. I like Linkin Park, A Perfect Circle, Green Day, and Good Charlotte. Stuff like that."

"Me too. Linkin Park is good. Especially on Meteora."

"Yep, that was a good album."

We approached his house and he let me inside. We sat on the couch.

"Tracker isn't here. It gets lonely sometimes," he admitted.

I nodded. "It's lonely at my house, too."

"You can come over anytime you want to."

I smiled at him. I actually smiled. "Thank you."

"I like you, Ellie. I want to help you."

I looked away, breaking eye contact. I didn't want him to see the pain that I was in, although I knew he already had. "I'm not sure I can be helped."

"Everybody can be helped."

"You don't know that."

"I want you to listen to something." He stood and put a CD in his stereo. A song started playing.

"No one can hurt you now

In this haven safe and sound

No one can save you now

From this grace you're drowning in

Just hold your breath on your way down

This fortress of tears

I've built from my fears

For you

This fortress wont fall

I've built it strong

For you

No one can free you now

From the chains around your heart

Don't be afraid now

Just dive and descend to me

And hold your breath on your way down

This fortress of tears

I've built from my fears

For you

This fortress wont fall

I've built it strong

For you

No one can hurt you now

In this haven safe and sound

Just hold your breath on your way down

This fortress of tears

I've built from my fears

For you

This fortress wont fall

I've built it strong

For you."

I was crying by the time the song had ended. "Why do you have to do stuff like that?" I asked him, angry that he'd gotten through my fortress. "I was doing fine until you come along and just…you challenge everything!"

"You need to cry, Ellie," he told me. "You need to get it out."

"I don't want to get it out. Its so much safer kept inside."

"And you're happy with it that way?"

"I need to go home."

He wanted to protest, but he didn't. He walked me home. We stood on my doorstep.

"I'm sorry I got mad earlier," I said.

"I know." He looked at me again, with those blue-grey eyes piercing my soul, forcing me to feel. He leaned closer, cupping my face his hands, and he kissed me. A deep, passionate, perfect kiss that I wanted to last forever. "Call me later?"

I could only manage a nod before I went inside. I collapsed against the doorframe.

"Where have you been?" Mom screamed at me.

It was always like this. Whenever she just starts drinking, she gets mean. After the first three or four, she just gets tired and passes out.

"I went to Sean's house…he's a guy from school," I told her. "We were studying."

"Studying? Yeah right. I know how boys study."

"Mom," I started. "That isn't fair…we didn't do anything."

"I don't believe you! I don't know what's happening to you. You used to be such a good kid."

I glared at her. "I still am! You used to be such a good mom; I don't know what happened to you!"

She slapped me. I ran out the door. I wasn't going to put up with that. There was no way. She had never hit me before.